asterisk09

11611 pts ยท December 17, 2014


I'm a dude. I like video games and gross jokes. I'm a murse.

You must be fun at parties.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I highly recommend cardiovascular ICU. But I'm biased.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A lot of these hit home for me, too, but I'm an ICU nurse. Mostly the ones about "what's the worst thing you've seen."

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Anyone who's ever done CPR knows your hands don't go on the titties.

8 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 9

It also helps with pulmonary hypertension. But at lower than boner-inducing doses.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Just because you're a raging cunt doesn't mean you aren't either.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I stopped watching TV news years ago and my life is fifty times better for it.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah dude I'm a fucking retard, good thing I recover people who just had open heart surgery. Ooooweeee, am I dumb, or what?

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 7

Maybe spend less time on Tumblr and more time in the real world. I've not heard that basically ever.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Might be a bit of an over-generalization, mate.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Found glasses with a co-worker when she was putting a catheter in a lady. The glasses were in her lady parts.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As a nurse, I can unfortunately tell you all about the yeasty underboob.

8 years ago | Likes 71 Dislikes 0

*sucks air in through teeth quickly*

8 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

Yeah dude, I'm a nurse and I've killed so many people. (OP, tell your roommate to come have his surgery here so I can recover him)

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 5

I didn't upvote this, not because I didn't like it, but because you had 1337 points and I didn't wanna ruin it.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Lack of competition is the problem here. Most markets have one or maybe two ISPs.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

This makes me absurdly depressed

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Being a nurse is kind of like that too. Except sometimes they're enough of an asshole that I get to give them haldol.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

HAHA BUTT CUM

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Pray for a nurse to flush that damn IV before it clots off!

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 4

I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE!

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Great, I'm a nurse, so they're gonna make me be a medic aren't they?

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Just rub honey, cayenne pepper, and olive oil on your taint. Works wonders. /s

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Activate that fuckin Cath lab. Stay strong @OP

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's how I react when people wake me up at 11:30, too. But I work night shift.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Fallout 4

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Let's talk business, gentlemen."

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He could get hypotensive if you had to cut his leg off and he bled out.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'm a nurse.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0