SpockIsMyHomeboy
262046
13147
166
Jul 28, 2016 2:51 PM
SpockIsMyHomeboy
262046
13147
166
Element20Three
I always up vote House.
avyon
I've been yelled at for waiting too long to see the doc but then I get yelled at for going in too soon :( ((cold symptoms))
ImNotAnOrange
As a person who has an inhaler I have no idea what I was expecting bu that wasn't it
katercharlo
You can see him dying on the inside. Just. Just dying.
ixxa2oo
They made us watch this clip at my hospital's orientation to emphasize the importance of patient education.
Mavgurian
I do not care for inhalers, they only kill themselves that way. Make sure they take their antibiotics accordingly, FFS!
Deziha
As an ER nurse I can confirm.
TheGraaaayGhost
Did you try the medicine drug?
grapesforducks
we need more mouse bites.
Bayani42
twenty years of this. Switched to IT. Exchanged one type of idiotic person for another. SMH
ub3rwarrior
FML* ftfy
RelaxGuyYouNeedARest
House: "Gribbit, gribbit, gribbit. You know another really good business? Teeny tiny baby coffins."
SpockIsMyHomeboy
".................GRIBBIT"
PeterMunoz
And with her perfume she sprays it in her mouth. You know, like a normal human being.
WestminsterHopkins
Natural selection at its finest
yellowtimer
you deserve more upvotes. +1
LotsOfPlaneStuff
Its fine shes probably got lupus.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Liver failure during the MRI.
nicholcm
Its never Lupus
mistercram
Like when epileptics stop taking their medication because "they stopped getting seizures after they took the medication"
OSCgal
People who don't finish their antibiotics because they no longer feel sick. *rages*
grapesforducks
Pet peeve right here grrrrrr. A friend who did this didn't understand why his illness kept coming back worse than before. I couldn't even.
thatcrazyasian
I will never forget this scene from House.
flapperfemmefatale
i liked the one with the little girl who masturbated and the mom was more upset than when she thought it was epilepsy.
Mavgurian
Remember the "every part of my body hurts" guy? The one with the broken finger with which he keeps poking himself?
acekicker
There's something a little 'Tyrion Lannister' about his acting. Or the other way around?
SpockIsMyHomeboy
I like how you think.
Woodcastle
A lady once treated her yeast infection with vapor rub because "if it burns it's working".
SpockIsMyHomeboy
*lights patient on fire*.....Better?
Woodcastle
Yeah but it makes my skin ashy.
glassweaver
Shit, fam. Just use some battery acid instead then. It's like a free chemical peel. The one simple trick salons don't want you to know!
NarcissusInc
SmergTheDargon
Everything you've ever done in your life has resulted in nothing but stoking the hatred others have for you. Fuck off. [That work?]
DeadNotSleeping1010
"Are you fucking sorry?!"
elbowdeepinadictator
Igetthatreference.gif
ElecTech
Please me?
imgurane
Adding Anti- A- or No to a word generally takes the opposite meaning. For example, antimatter, or "No thank you." ...... you're welcome.
twixxx
I guess it's time I watched House. I've never got around to it D:
yellowtimer
Do it! It's a really fun show.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
It's an American take on Sherlock Holmes in a medical setting. Love love love it
IWouldBeACatIfICould
Only Sherlock holmes wouldn't screw up so much
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Just be a raging sociopath
oneofthecalled
INHALER?! I don't want to know her
MostOfMyFavoritesAreNSFW
I don't like puns that much but I still upvoted
Dominiricanish
You don't know how truly stupid people can be until you work in the medical field. It's fucking incredible!
WoeToHice
You're kidding, right? Just go on Facebook, pick any trending topic and read people's posts and comments.
Andilee
No thank you! I've done that once all it did was make me go wtf a bunch and get real angry at the stupidity.
grapesforducks
"This medication worked for pt, get a prior auth from their insurance so they'll cover the med." Ins co resists us, wants more and more
grapesforducks
2 documentation, eventually getting the list of medications tried from the pharmacy... at which point we learned pt hadn't filled any of the
grapesforducks
3 previous scripts, 1.5 years' worth, because he had to pay part of those costs. No wonder the free sample showed such improvement!
ojp1977
I've worked in retail, food industry, and IT - you don't have to work in medical field to find out people are stupid. I will say, I had 1/2
ojp1977
never given up on humanity until after I started working in IT.
thecoon55
*Takes pt off of Nasal cannula 2/lpm for 30 seconds to switch o2 tanks, pt starts yelling about how they can't breathe.*
SpockIsMyHomeboy
truth
asterisk09
God dammit this is painfully true.
Cannadance
As an idiot myself, I must ask, shouldn't have someone shown her how to use it in the first place?
mazurpapa
the name INHALER kinda covers all the intel, dont you think
asterisk09
As a nurse, yes. Respiratory therapy and/or their nurse should have taught them, depending on if thet were in/outpatient.
grapesforducks
Gave instructions to collect a urine sample.Pt put the disinfecting wipes into the sample, for a microbial culture. We had to call her back.
NightButtFairyHawk
If you have a cut, and I give you a band-aid, and you to set it on fire & throw it out of a window, is it my fault?
GirlintheTown
Yes. And if there isn't a warning on the band aid I will sue!
grapesforducks
Yes. That doesn't mean she paid attention or remembered it. A lot of people think they're smart enough & don't need the directions.
peddroelm
DO I LOOK STOOPID ?
TheyveGonePLAID
I have chronic asthma. Had to teach my sister how to use her inhaler for bronchitis because doc didn't show her how.
Mavgurian
Is there no package leaflet with instructions in your country? Here packages are sometimes bigger then needed just to get the thing into it.
OfNefariousIntent
Eau de Albuterol...
hairtriggercunt
"Well congratulations...you just gave yourself an MI"
errisgeeee
d'Albuterol*
anonymoususerisanonymous99
L'eau d'Albuteral
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Slogan: "Just Breathe."
CrayolaCrayons
Are you a doctor?
alienwithflowers
Symbicort*
phnxfire
Salbutamol*
tickleteeth
Omelette du fromage...
inugod
/a/6M1Gc
murks
Mmm that fresh medicine plastic smell. We can't resist it..
ThisGuyHere
"J'adore Ipratropium" -Not Charlize Theron
butImNotBasicRx
True life. Had a patient show me the same thing at the pharmacy.
Pointlesscommentary
I had a pharmacy patient that thought he was supposed to exhale into the thing.
pookieeatworld
I exhale, then puff and inhale at the same time, maybe his doctor explained that and he got confused?
Pointlesscommentary
That's definitely possible
yellowtimer
You can go to the salon and get a full nebulizer makeover!
goodjobmyfellowman
eau you!
ShuffleBoars
Fun Fact! I am allergic to Albuterol.
RespiratoryRandy
Are you allergic, or are you sensitive? If it's a heartrate/jitters situation, ask for Xopenex or levalbuterol next time
ShuffleBoars
I guess there is an additive that they put in it that makes it adhere to lungs and such that makes my lungs/throat swell upon contact.
ShuffleBoars
One of my daughters gets a chest infection at least once a year. When they give her breathing treatments, I've gotten it on my skin. Same.
SuckitPUPPS
Well that super sucks :(
ShuffleBoars
It has led to hilarious hi jinks in hospitals. Other than that, your assessment is correct. :(
PooPooInSpaghettiEveryoneUpsetti
A friend of mine works in a hospital. Some girl was taking her contraception pills by the vagina.
Zombraina
I don't understand how people can fuck up that bad if they're literate. It says all over the packaging how to fucking use it.
VEpsilon
Well good on her for trying not to reproduce.
GreenLanternMD
"...but only when I need them. Sometimes that's 5x a day, so the pack doesn't even last a month. What am I supposed to do?"
UnicornAbbey
You can take most oral contraception pills vaginally! My gyno told me to do this when I had stomach flu, to prevent missed (vomited) pills.
DrArbitrary
I just asked a pharmacist about this, she confirmed it, but like you said, not all pills. Check with your doctor or pharmacist first!
NightButtFairyHawk
At least that's "plausible." But INHALE-er. Ment to be INHALED.
Pirkale
You think "those" people know what such a big word means? :)
TrickyChlovers
A pt of mine swallowed the capsules youre supposed to place in the spiriva handihaler and inhale and asks why she wasnt improving.
therocksfannypack
Oh my gosh
TrickyChlovers
i heard she was ok, which is good! but omg the things patients have told me i cannot make up! i need to write a book
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Had an obese lady give birth in the ER and immediately said "That's not mine....where dat come from?"
lesliebananas
Had a black lady give birth and ask why her baby came out "so black" :/
kayjayshay
That was me, sorry
CatLadyLvl2
Please do a "work stories" post X)
SpockIsMyHomeboy
HA! I've actually done two of them. I'll comment with the links:
PajamaStripes
My aunt had a girl claim there was no way she could be pregnant, because she only had sex with gay guys.
glassweaver
Next time she should do the world a favor and have sex with a chainsaw.
mondayaddams
Or two.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
These are the types of patients I gave Aspirins to. When they asked why, I told them to hold it between their knees and don't let it go.
PajamaStripes
lol
ImAfraidYoureAllPsychosSoIMadeThisAccount
Sorry, my wife and I have proven many times that doesn't work :P
SpockIsMyHomeboy
It doesn't count for doggy fashion lol
PleaseDontRespondToMySarcasticCommentsWithASeriousReply
Hugh Laurie's ability to emote sarcastically is a national treasure
Gawky
which nations?
somanyfeels21
I was just thinking that too, this is an incredibly nuanced acting job, he's pretty in the moment there.
gondring
International.
PleaseDontRespondToMySarcasticCommentsWithASeriousReply
Interstellar:
SmergTheDargon
MERPH
imgurane
What... did.... I just... watch
eetsumkaus
I mean, he IS British
TheArrestingAbhorrentArrantAbominableAlliterator
PleaseDontRespondToMySarcasticCommentsWithASeriousReply might be british.
Zombraina
It's still international because House was a Fox TV show, which is an American network.
eetsumkaus
I was just saying he was a natural at it because he was British haha
Zombraina
Oh, that makes sense. c:
blues1841
Am medic, can confirm patients can be this stupid.
HarryPotterReferenceProbably
I need a fish to go along with this bait
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Brother. http://static.celebuzz.com/uploads/2013/06/14/almighty-five.gif
Radix865
I'm a human being, I can confirm many human beings can be this stupid.
thecoon55
As an EMT starting medic school in a month http://www.reactiongifs.com/r/fgwv.gif
burritoz
that face. that's the face of "I'm dying a little inside"
THEOTHERUPVOTEFAIRY
I make this face a lot working at Walmart. Thanks to both fellow coworkers and customers.
TheFinalDoctor
"Actually Ma'am that says 'supplementary' not 'suppository' "
TheRealWhaleLord
When the guy in front doesn't know how the chip reader works at Walmart.
CounterPuncher
When the guy in front doesn't understand that he has to pay money for his groceries...
TheRealWhaleLord
I will do a post of all the stories from Walmart over the past months if one person requests it.
CounterPuncher
Please. A retail cesspool like that has to have good story.
sirenes90
He looks excactly like my dad does when he's talking to an idiot, that's how I learned not to be an idiot. I hope XD
CaverExtrordinaire
No. That's the face of "I have been sent a gift"
flapperfemmefatale
this is the exact context of that scene. i watch House too much.
Wallaceman105
Nonsense! There's no such thing as too much house!
Williciousness
I have been sent a "gifted"
RaefWolfe
[internal screaming]
dimmor
Hugh Laurie's dad was a doctor so he probably borrowed that look straight from him too
Newballs
This also works in IT alot, rather than me tell them how stupid I think they are I ask them to show me.. they usually realise soon after
Radar1980
Preach
NotForYourEyes0
Yaaasssss ♀️ #JobSecurity
KrondaxDrakhien
I just sent that to my friends titled, IT in a nutshell
darkhavana0512
vogelstroika
Did support previously. Can confirm
SpockIsMyHomeboy
tallonmetroid56
.
Ohtarher
This is how most technical fields work. You would be afraid to fly if you knew how stupid some pilots are.
waldogmt
"a lot"...two words. As a grammar Nazi, my job is done. Good-night.
ChickenFingerFingers
Yep!
Feenfurn
Ugh I have to call IT almost every night and I always start off with how much my computers hate me. Every single one of them.
glassweaver
Fucking. Hell. Today, I had someone send me, VIA EMAIL...a printout of a powerpoint, and ask me to remove the slides she'd crossed out...1/2
glassweaver
....There was no other file attached. She was sad that I couldn't take grainy black & white printouts and make the ppt come back from them.
BattlefieldCounterStrike
Swans can be gay
xbxoxy
yeah i was about to comment the same, we see this in IT every single fucking day
Soraptors
My usual experience is people calling themselves stupid and saying they are doing something wrong, when is something they can't solve alone.
Soraptors
Like a remote reset on a machine, or keys to work with the cables in the back.
deltagradient
ALOT
WhereDidILoseMyPants
I have heard that many people can't find the "any" key when told to "hit any key" by Windows and call support. . smh :(
pancreas
https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/keyboard-any-key-17764203.jpg its right there next t the...apostrophe/@ key? this keyboard is an abomination
symbre
did you talk to my customer?
rdbcruzer
Its my favorite trick. "Ok, show me." does thing, long pause "Ohhh, OHHHHHHH OHHH SHIT." Me "ya, have a nice day."
gpechorin
Can confirm. "I followed the instructions" usually means that they didn't
Newballs
You know what's even more annoying, the read out the onscreen instructions and need me to confirm it for them.. "Your password has expired..
Newballs
To change, please select switch user and try log in" they need me to tell them 2 or 3 times with this one to actually do it!
NecroticWords
Sorry. I am am Ogre and when my electronics stop working I smash them and bring them to my IT Man. Not sorry.
Winterboer
I wish I had the money to smash my electronics every time they stop working.
Newballs
Difference here is the company most likely foots the bill
khtad
Can fucking confirm.
sakkehattu
I always tell the IT "explain to me as if I was an idiot, because I am."
FirstAidPoetry
Or as an English teacher. You have no idea how often I ask people to spell ’a lot‘ and they write "alot".
Highlander8795
what about allot?
FirstAidPoetry
Only when there's an allotment :)
ActivateMyAlucard
Personally, I think the reason I despise the space in "a lot" is because it sounds like I'm describing a region if space. "Yeah it's a lot"
Newballs
I'm completely ignorant to this. I do it alot... despite autocorrect, I don't know why I prefer it being alot rather than a lot. Sorry!
FirstAidPoetry
Don't be sorry. I'm the ass. Tip: google for "the a lot is better" and read the blog entry. You'll remember the difference and laugh lots.
Newballs
I really liked that Alot. ;)
Newballs
Now imagine me buttfucking a cross between a bear, yak and a pug muhahaha
myrt
"please unplug both ends of your network cable and switch it around, that might help" (oh it WAS unplugged, good heavens)
ASUSunDvl
That's great
valen00
oooh I like that one, I'll use it
BlowDog
A lot of people have no idea how wifi works or what ssid they are even connected to.
Sqwuid
Oh shit that's good
rdbcruzer
I once convinced a caller to take her network cable out, shake the TCP/IP out, and reconnect it. Im not proud of myself.
trajakovic
brilliant and elegant
GreenLanternMD
You should be....
idislikecomingupwithuniqueusernames
That is brilliant. I'm using that one next time someone doesn't want to check their cable :)
pancreas
Damn, I hate those packet clogs in my network cables.
ExtremelyHappyGuy
That's when you try to sell them your brand new product line: "network drano". And tell them you'll throw in a free DVD re-winder.
DerpyWerm
And then send them a cardboard box with "Do not open frajle machenere" written in sharpie on it taped to a CD spool
pancreas
Free?! What a bargain!
glassweaver
Oh! And last week, a lady called one of my techs asking for help changing the batteries in her mouse. He spent 15 minutes on this before....
glassweaver
...asking her if it had a cord coming out of it. Guess who wanted to change the fucking batteries on the USB mouse they unplugged?!?!?!?!
Naturally90
I feel reief when the IT guy actually takes more than 30 secs to solve my problem
eetsumkaus
don't worry about it. Even smart people do stupid shit sometimes. It's the repeat offenders who are stubborn that are the problem
becausebugeye
So much this!!!
vogelstroika
^ I've even been fine with stupid people if they tried and/or are humble
Raig228
Oh yes. So much yes. I'll have patience with the sweet little old grandma all day. Not stupid, of course, but still repeated difficulties.
Newballs
As long as you introduce yourself and say more than my PC won't work we'll appreciate you! Also, if you're a girl.. we'll probably alrea 1/2
Newballs
Already have a soft spot for you.. go you!! lol but seriously, just explain as good as you can, we'll appreciate the effort :)
Naturally90
Pretty sure the IT guy likes me. I've never had to wait longer than a few minutes after an email request for help haha.
Newballs
Lucky you! For urgent emails, I let them wait a day or so. Non urgent, hour tops. I'm trying to train them to call for urgent issues hahaha
Sqwuid
IT Techs trusted me. Then we spent two hours trying to work out an issue. Turns out the cable was unplugged. He laughed for five minutes.
ActivateMyAlucard
As someone who does IT now and then, that's my exact reaction in those scenarios
Space2place
@emmaflorence, I feel relief when I help the "IT person" fix what he/she couldn't fix themselves. ^_~
para9
then they need to get another job or you need to get their job
BewareTheCrocigator
As long as the staff member doesn't lie about it or blame me I don't care how long it takes me to fix it :D
BewareTheCrocigator
Only problem is the dreaded "so what was wrong" when I have to decide to tell them the truth or lie so they don't look stupid
SirPloper
I tell them the truth unless its a password reset because they forgot it and say that they aren't entering it in wrong i then say don't know
Phenome
Dude, my users dont know the difference between an internet cable and a laptop charger....
Newballs
I feel your pain "There's loads of cables I can't tell which one you're on about"
bkeljda
Unplug the NIC cable sir. Ok its off. What do you mean off? I unplugged the big black cable, now my computers off. -_-.......
returnofgannon
OK but that's not fair. I as someone who knows their way around a computer, including what a NIC is, have never heard it called that.
bkeljda
Depending on what department I am talking to depends how i will say it. This particular guy claimed to be head of IT so i figured he knew 1/
bkeljda
what i was talking about. That's when i realized that he was clueless.
returnofgannon
I always say ethernet cable.
bkeljda
That works, depending on who you're talking to.
Phenome
i say the one that looks like a phone cable. "whats a phone cable".... ok, the one that is plastic and see-through at the end? yea that one.
lordcaric
I usually just say the one that looks like a phone cord but bigger, most people get that.
bkeljda
I've done that also, and gotten the strangest response ever...whats a phone cord? The person i was talking to had never seen one
ExtremelyHappyGuy
"Who's 'Nick' and which cable did he make?" Surprised you didn't get that one.
bkeljda
My mom has said that before lol
ExtremelyHappyGuy
That's awesome!
ThatGuyWhoThinksEveryoneIsAPineapple
Funny story when I worked in IT support- Me: "Hi there, how can I help?" Them: "My computer won't turn on!" M: "Okay, is it plugged in?" 1/?
valen00
I had one "printer doesn't work" same end result, I mean cmon!
dpidcoe
I heard this story in an email my grandpa forwarded me in the late 90s.
ThatGuyWhoThinksEveryoneIsAPineapple
Really? Huh, that's odd. I guess it's happened to people before, I guess.
dpidcoe
That's probably why it ended up in an email.
ThatGuyWhoThinksEveryoneIsAPineapple
T: "I don't know." M: "Can you check for me?"T: "No."M: "Why not?"T: "It's too dark behind the desk." M: "Can you turn on the lights?" (2/?)
ThatGuyWhoThinksEveryoneIsAPineapple
T: "No." M: "Why not?" T: "Because we're having a power cut over here." M: *Trying not to shout and swear* "Please wait until the cut (3/?)
ThatGuyWhoThinksEveryoneIsAPineapple
ends, thank you!" I think I might have threatened more than one of my coworkers after that. (4/4)
ThisIsTheLastTimeIChangeUsernamesIPromise
Yeah sure, this most told it joke ever happened to you
CyberAkuma
You got that from Rinkworks didn't you?
stokedgoat
I had that exact situation more than once when supporting McDonalds stores. "Help all our registers just shutdown!"
rdbcruzer
Ive had this call. Also one where the local servers were UNDER FUCKING WATER, and the customers wanted to know why there was an outage.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Funny story: Whenever I was teaching a computer class, I asked them to right click & this lady kept clicking normally. I said no that's -->
SpockIsMyHomeboy
called a left click. I asked her to right click *left click again*. Then I said "you're left clicking, use the other button." --->
SpockIsMyHomeboy
No joke...she picked up her left hand and put it on the mouse on her right and started clicking. "Like this?", she said.
RichardPOsterior
1That's up there with an RN I was working with who complained her mouse was too hard to use and it was doing the opposite of what she wanted
RichardPOsterior
2Long story short, she had never used a corded mouse. She looked me square in the eye and said "The tail goes in the back, right?".
purpleraptor
And you're trying so hard to contain yourself
SpockIsMyHomeboy
I'm a southerner so I immediately made that face and said "bless your heart".
jenjeh
My coworker calls right click "left click" all the time. I've given up trying to correct her.. Breaks my brain.
TechnicallyRight
I had to tell someone where the escape key was. Its happened twice now at my job. I made a info-graphic http://imgur.com/j6FVuGz
SpockIsMyHomeboy
"Es-capè!"
GlowGreen
This is why macs only have one button.
GlowGreen
(note: personally, I hate macs, but you gotta hand it to them for idiotproofing)
pixe1adrift
i can't stand not being able to right click D:
Tkeleth
I'll do you one better - I was showing someone computer basics (they knew how to play Solitaire. That's it) and I told them to right-click(1
Tkeleth
where it says 'My Computer,' and I shit you not they clicked on it and then STARTED TO TYPE THE WORD 'CLICK.' Write... click. (2
schuwima
I'm working in IT, too. I hate those Layer 8 problems.
whatseventhepointt
The correct thing to do is probably explain what the terms mean, and how they relate to the equipment in use.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
This was my class. I spent weeks covering basics with them before we went into hands-on. I tested them, they knew or should've known.
suchahodor
Did she still left click?? Omfg lol
SpockIsMyHomeboy
Yep. Still did.
Kompo85
I had this in remote session. I kid you not, she was writing the word 'click' in ms word.
Aibell125
Noooooo. I don't believe you
thewhifflingtit
That is a special kind of stupid.
SpockIsMyHomeboy
https://cdn.meme.am/instances/58760770.jpg
HPWombat
Favorite comment thread ever
randomitguy
I am in IT and have seen this before "What difference does it make which hand I use!!??" #facepalm
DerpyWerm
You'd think that everyone would realize that different buttons do different things at this point, but surprisingly there are some who don't
ObamaLlamaDuck
The classic PICNIC error.
TheLANBeforeTime
For those who network, a layer 8 issue!
ASUSunDvl
ID-10-T Error
IHaveASiriusCyberneticsCorporationGenuinePeoplePersonality
I learned the hard way superintendents don't like "FM" as a "Fix Action" in tickets.
Aibell125
PICNIC?
Chokehold
Learning a system at a new job, people who have been there for several years started using their mice with left hand. (1/2)
Chokehold
First and only time sincecthen that I've heard someone explain it to me as "wrong-click" rather than right-click. (2/2)