ConfederacyOfDunces
527544
9852
268
cocoa butter kiss
me irl
Why Men get caught with murders
Part 1: http://imgur.com/gallery/gZzg5
Part 2: http://imgur.com/gallery/eEMBJ
Part 3: http://imgur.com/gallery/8B17r
Part 5: http://imgur.com/gallery/tlXTA
Part 6: http://imgur.com/gallery/sRkVU
Part 7: http://imgur.com/gallery/1WK8R
Part 8: http://imgur.com/gallery/H5EX6
Part 9: http://imgur.com/gallery/7LMIV
pseudoirishman
I fuckin' love cocoa butter! It's as manly as Jesus's beard.
NaBrO
#1! That's my username! I never thought it would happen...
missrinoko
Someday I hope to have so few fucks that I'll have sex with my girlfriend on top of her car. Also someday I hope to have a girlfriend.
Wolfpack22
With the tomato one, can I have some salt with it?
levzin
Fetus deletus. I'm dying.
gengumby
how can a fetus type?
GlitterInTheDarkNearTheTannhauserGate
Are you a fetus.
DrFo0Ls
I lost it.
Beckinpdx
http://media.giphy.com/media/kxNQqpj1wTiX6/giphy.gif" class="comment__media" loading="lazy"/>
accidentalslut
(◑‿◐) yep
losingmyperspicacity
Thank god theres always a new plucky imgurian sifting through the heaping pile of garbage that is Tumblr to find the gems for us:)
Harmonex
Wait, is the reason you don't see the old ones still going because they got too jaded and quit?
WhimsicalCalamari
Seems like OP is just sifting through the heaping pile of tumblr compilations that are already on imgur.
ronaldinyo
"Hi Shoulder, I'm Dad."
SomeDetroitGuy
#4 - Mary did a magic trick. People are pretty chill with it.
gengumby
GrumpyCommentDispenser
In today's news: tumblr overreacts to puns.
thurmanator3000
I'm leaving. I can't even. Did you just. No..
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE
Coming next: the sky. Is it blue?
Notforhire
For the first one, if the man is that serious about smelling like cocoa butter, he shouldnt be ashamed of buying girl stuff anyway
humbugga
While reading these, I have been hit in the face twice by stink bugs....
onedayiwillruletheworld
Did anyone else also know that the tellietubbies were called teletubbies because of the teles on their tummies since they were little?
RamboNZ
Yeah I thought that was common knowledge
MusculusSternocleidomastoideus
Since I'm from another country (no English), I did not know, cause we don't say tubby :D
gablen500
ieatinsanityforbreakfast
Fun period fact time! Tampons were actually made to plug bullet holes during WW2, but the nurses were like "Ugh got my peri-WAIT THIS MIGHT
ieatinsanityforbreakfast
WORK LET'S SHOVE THIS THING UP MY TINGLY BITS" and yeah. That's one of the reasons they're so shitty for you.
ieatinsanityforbreakfast
Cups 4eva
will242
I feel weird buying tampons because there are 50 billion kinds and i don't know wtf you want and I have to stand there for an hour trying to
will242
figure out what the fuck I should get with women circling because they are thinking the same thing about if I would be wondering if they we
will242
re bleeding right then when all I'm thinking is "Why wont someone help me?"
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
tampon brands are really confusing, and I'm a girl who buys them often.
villhelm
ha! kids these days. try doing that back in the day when you couldn't just pull out a cell phone to call and ask her
will242
That was what i was talking about
MandNBeers
2 H's double bond O.........that, that doesn't work
VampireInstagram
Seconded. Why didn't this get more attention?
PsuPepperoni
and the way they wrote "omg" and "ok", though I guess there would be no joke if written correctly.
TheyStoleTheSun
When you pee, your bladder is still ~10 full of urine.
hencethequeef
How many urine? Ten. Ten urine.
TheyStoleTheSun
~10% sorry. i had a few drinks
hencethequeef
No, no. I like it the way you had it before.
TheyStoleTheSun
What do i do now then? im torn between two options
BisonForPresident
Every Tumblr post that doesn't end in "I'm so done" or "This *insert desired expletive* site" or something like that is infinitely better.
thurmanator3000
DID YOU JUST
Wulfgang77
Pomegranate Cherry Sunshine sure beat smelling like dick and asscrack.
AsAWhiteWoman
I find it weird that imgur loves tumblr posts while simultaneously hating everyone on tumblr. Anyone else notice that?
vanella
Don't go look for the crazies!!!
DysgraphicProgrammer
It's almost as though there was more than one person on this site.
Ambroos
I don't think we hate everyone on Tumblr, just the usual ridiculous drama queens who get offended by everything. Because they're annoying.
PublicClassMiloImplementsPerson
It's not really weird. We love their good stuff and hate their bad.
MonaPizza
Just like tumblr!
TheFoxCouncil
It's looking through the glass at a zoo to watch monkeys flinging shit, as opposed to actually being inside the enclosure with them.
align
best explanation I've ever heard
Samamsh
Damn perfect explanation. Couldn't have said it better
GrateLordCheesus
That spoke to me on a spiritual level.
IChangeMyUsernameMoreThanIChangeMyUnderwear
that is beautiful
ManLegit
I for one despise their habit of "I'm so done with, did you just, *italic responses*, etc". I know its their thing, but its lame cliche shit
iwenttohogwarts
Because Imgur TOTALLY doesn't do that. At all. Ever.
RoundThreeFIGHT
Did you just
ManLegit
+1 for rebuttal, I always up vote replies, THIS, sadDrWho.gif, its pronounced 'gif'
iwenttohogwarts
Precisely! They have their replies, we have ours.
align
spot on
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE
The difference for me is that I don't upvote anyone who does that garbage, and every tumblr post ends with the same stuff
iwenttohogwarts
So does every Imgur post. It's part of the community.
SquiddlyDiddly
WHY WEREN'T THEY CALLED TELETUMMIES!?!?! I'M SO MAD RIGHT NOW!!!!!
Kafein
English is not my native language. This teletubbies things is pretty much TIL.
dogenuggets
I always assumed it was baby-speak.
IAmTheOneCuttingTheOnions
Tele is TV in spanish.
SquiddlyDiddly
it's also slang for Tv in england/aus/every country ever lol. My issue was with the tubbies part when the teles in the tummies.
IAmTheOneCuttingTheOnions
OH OK sorry xD.
BergerMan
Because they were tubby
SquiddlyDiddly
but the 'tele's were in their tummies not tubbies lol
TheCarolingian
Kids learn to pronounce the 'b' sound b4 they learn the 'm' sound. Teletubbies was genius in understanding phonetic development in children.
wintermute93
I don't think this is true. [m], [n], and [b] are all among the first phonemes infants acquire. Most won't have [l] for another year or so.
TheCarolingian
As I understand it, the hard vowels come first. Hence Daddy before Mummy (in most cases), but then all kids are different!
BergerMan
Tubby means short and chubby, which is what they are.
austenbronte
I don't get the Rapunzel joke.
sammythebull
Why did you explain it to him? You should have this humorless bastard live his existence always wondering!
austenbronte
HAHAHA, now THIS comment made me laugh. Thanks. I needed a palate cleanser after Rapunzel.
AskingTheRealQuestions
It's a bad joke. Not sure why it's even there.
austenbronte
Yup. Pretty bad. I should've gotten it though. As an English major, I feel the Shame.
AskingTheRealQuestions
As a non-native English speaker who immediately got it, yes you should have. :)
Seanathan65
Ra PUN zel
austenbronte
Thanks. That was drier than average sexless spell of imgurians in general.
wearymalaise
Thanks. I get it now but I didn't laugh.
Seanathan65
I doubt anyone did
kkuja
I did. But I'm not very smart.
pencilcase
#20... yeah you have a UTI...
PeanutButterEverything
my first thought
Britboy
Not all the time, sometimes if you squeeze too hard when you jerk it that can happen... Or so a friend told me
MrBananaBeak
Pretty sure that happened to me yesterday.
losingmyperspicacity
Who told you about my uncomfortably tiny intestine..?
diregamer
That... That actually sounds pretty painful...
sirlurksaSPACElot
Unfortunate titty incident
ShepskyHuskherd
What classifies as an unfortunate titty incident?
whyexactly
a UTI hurts, it doesn't make you feel like you have to pee more.
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
For me it makes me feel like I constantly have to pee, but couldn't. Seriously, most annoying ailment ever. But it can be different for some
buttermyarse
Me too. But i've also had burny pee. Guess it depends on different types of infection.
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
I've had both =( at the same time. So not fun
whyexactly
Interesting, I've never heard of that symptom before but I've had that feeling come up at random.
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
I think it's because your bladder can get swollen with a UTI. But that feeling is also a sign of dehydration.
Waxsmile
Or a tipped uterus
buttermyarse
Tip: ladies always pee after sex. Reduces the risk of a UTI
FlatPlutoSociety
Or you drank a fuckton of coffee during the afternoon and a bunch of beer at night. Source: my bladder right now
illogicalphallusies
Nah, there is a distinct difference, if you are standing there at the toilet dick in hand, just peed and "need to pee" more but there 1/2
wompwompwomp
It can also be a symptom of dehydration. Either way, the best thing to do is drink a lot of water and you'll actually pee!
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
yeah that's my issue. When I'm dehydrated, I have the urge to pee a LOT, but I can't. Which makes no sense.
illogicalphallusies
Is nothing left no matter how hard you try....thats a UTI. Having to actually pee lots is kind of normal 2/2
therealSKYKING
Holy fuck I had that exact feeling once after I whacked it. It eventually went away the next day, but is that a bad thing?
LittleAutumnLeaves
That may not have been a UTI, sometimes (over)stimulation of genitals can cause discomfort that lasts hours-days but does go away by itself
herrocaro
An infection can spread to your kidneys but if it was for just one day you're probably fine.
UnPetitSugarcube
I had a kidney infection. Lost ten pounds in two days (I'm already thin) and the doc said I was dangerously close to death. Very painful.
herrocaro
That's terrible glad you're alright! One of the most terrifying symptoms is quick weight loss/gain. A girl I know gained 50lbs in 1/2
herrocaro
1 month. Turns out she had thyroid cancer. 2/2
Omny
If you feel like peeing even after you've peed, you're dehydrated. Drink more water. If it's painful, you might have a bladder infection.
aliciazombie
I usually have this sensation after having a bottle of water; still the case?
buttermyarse
UTI is uncomfortable and you feel the need to desperately pee but there is no water to pass. It can also burn.
ImTheSchmitt
Also if you have been holding it your bladder expands, you could be feeling the discomfort of it retracting back to normal
YesIChangedMyNameAgain
Not sure if this the science side of imgur or the fetish side. Mayhaps both?
Gingefro
I think they might be the same thing
BuzzBuzzMama
Also, pregnancy.
Drakeslade
I drink a lot of water, but constantly feel the need to pee very little amounts. You a pee doctor?
PatrasNana
or you're old-lucky, lucky me!
CrocodileTears19
I believe that sensation can also be caused by diabetes or an sti
TheUserCommonlyKnownAsJackFrost
I drink almost a gallon of water a day and this happens to me.
rip36706
No I drink average amounts, and then less, then lot of water, effects all the same. I finish peeing, leave bathroom, and could pee again. :/
Maripapay
maybe you're drinking too much water then
TheUserCommonlyKnownAsJackFrost
Could be that too.
AwhatNwhatAwhatMwhatE
I get the feeling whenever I have tea for breakfast. Damn its diuretic properties!!
slagath0r
Exactly, thank you
Mybuttstinksgood
Or pregnant, that's my life now
blahdeedah
Wait, what? Why would being dehydrated give you the urge to pee? Crap...back to Google for me, sigh.
Omny
It's like, your bladder wants to keep peeing the normal amount, but there's nothing there to pee. It's like bladder blue balls.
TheManYourManCouldSmellLike
Well, that escalated quickly.
JhericFury
Damn, usually when this happens i'm trying to get to sleep, drinking loads of water is risky business at that time.
WolfTheRobber
I drink ALOT of water, and sometimes I still get that feeling
ComicAvec
It can also be chlamydia, interstitial cystitis, benign prostata hyperplasia, overly active bladder or any number of causes.
Omny
True, but it's only usually when its accompanied by other symptoms.
imgician
Source,: WebMD
ComicAvec
I'm a GP.
imgician
I actually kind of figured that. I'm just poking fun at all these hypochondriacs that self diagnose thru typing symptoms in to websites.
pylliam
HEIL HYDRATE
pylliam
HEIL HYDRATE
Jusmar
Sometimes over er... Stimulation of your genitals (mostly men) can make the urethra incredibly sensitive and pained.
anneka
That pee after masturbation....
IonaJ
or you're pregnant
wompwompwomp
It's good to drink a lot of water either way because you can flush a beginning infection.
dogenuggets
This should be higher.
nobodyeverpaysmeingum
I drink more water than anyone i know & pee more than anyone i know. went to the doctor and he said drink less water. i need a new doctor
Frogapus
Alternately, too-frequent masturbation (for guys) can also trigger this.
whyexactly
And if you think you're starting to get a UTI/bladder infection, drink lots of water and cranberry/blueberry juice with no added sugar ++
MulattoGelato
Considering it can be any type of infection it'd be called NSU (Non-specific Urethritis), take it from a guy who... Just knows.
TheNextMsFrizzle
Take cranberry pills if you don't like the juice. But drink water and also avoid caffeine and spicy food.
whyexactly
++ and avoid sugar as best you can. And pee frequently.
JustAnotherSoulLessMonster
And here I am, still after doing this, in absolute agony..
whyexactly
Go talk to a doctor, they have a cool new antibiotic for it that you only have to take once. It mixes with water and tastes like oranges.
ElonFoster
This is exactly the post I was looking for.
isaackaz
Where the fuck was this information 3 months ago? I couldn't sleep I felt like I had to pee consistently
BootyPaladin
The worst is when you are peeing in your dreams, but the feeling doesn't go away. So you are constantly peeing in your dreams.
pinecone
And the huge feeling of relief (pun not intended) when you wake up after pee dream and you STILL need to go to toilet.
dogenuggets
Well you'd better hope the feeling doesn't go away...
BreadyStinellis
You wake yourself up and go to the bathroom immediately. Last time I let myself pee in a dream I was 15 and wet the bed. Not cool.
creatingusernamesgivesmeanxiety
I've done this. It messed me up so bad, to this day I check for signs that I'm awake before I start peeing.
BreadyStinellis
Me too! I actually just confessed this bed wetting to my husband tonight. I'm worried I jinxed myself.
TheMrGUnit
Or perhaps you suffer from a condition known as BPH, or enlarged prostate. THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!
cmw929638
What about feeling like pooping after you've finished pooping?
anneka
I'll guess you need more fibre in your diet.
pinecone
But wait, there is more!
CaptainUnspeakable
As a man, lady deodorant is the best. You seen the stuff for dudes? "Phoenix"? "Rage"? Those are not smells! I know what a mango smells like
GrinchyM
When I was younger I really liked using Lynx Africa. Looking back, I don't think it actually smelled like Africa. 4/10
CaptainUnspeakable
Or Lynx for that matter?
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
my bf often borrows my deodorant because apparently girl deodorant lasts longer because we care more about stinking than dudes do.
CaptainUnspeakable
I wouldn't know about that, but girl deodorant works fine for me. Plus it's more subtle. I don't need everyone to smell me coming.
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
yeah seriously. guy deodorant is powerful stuff! Girl deodorant smell much subtler
gingerbaconkitty
BUT RAGE IS SO MANLY. No I feel ya, some of our lady stuff has some weird ass names for scents as well haha. Like, dafuck is "Daisy Fresh".
hoofbeatsandsnowflakes
seriously. My 2 favorite smells are "Clean" (WTF is that even supposed to represent?) and "Fresh Sport" (because sports smell good?)
CaptainUnspeakable
Fair, but even ignoring vague names, man stuff has a tendency to be really in-your-face and strong. Cucumber and green tea is more subtle.
gingerbaconkitty
True. If a girl uses guy deodorant you can tell immediately. Because they all smell like HOT GUY and they're so intense lol.
CaptainUnspeakable
Hey, I recognize your username! You got after me about comics. Good times.
gingerbaconkitty
LOL I did?
dicklover42069CAPTAINAMERICALOVESTHEWINTERSOLDIERSBIGBONER
girl deodorant is the best deodorant tbh
ashrynn
Have you even smelled Old Spice? It's magical
psnivy
I dunno about that...I spent middle school using old spice even though I'm a girl
redrovered
I legitimately use cocoa butter kiss. It smells like magic and cookies and wonder. But my boyfriend's old spice stuff is also awesome.
anglophilestymie
And here I am, 26 yo female, using male deodorant because the female stuff just doesn't work. Darn you sweaty armpits!
SunshineShannon
I don't know about deodorant, but your name is really long...
zstorm6
Guys is stronger. I have a friend that has to use guys deoderant because she sweats up a storm.
kisselface
It smells nice, but it sucks at doing it's job. Lasts for maybe 20 minutes in your armpits but 20 years on your clothing.
tarnivore
'Citrus magic' how can anyone pass that shit up?!
ashrynn
Because by the end of the day, it smells less like magic and more like orange bo
Amythyst
Okay, at first I read this as "Clitoris magic" and I was wondering how the hell they got that into stores.
causality
Girl deodorant sucks. It clumps up in your pit hair and you have to pick it out in the shower.
UnPetitSugarcube
The secret is bar soap. The liquid stuff doesn't do it for some reason.
Teenygator
I already forgot the brand, but I use the scent Brazil. It reminds me of flowers and foresty Moss goodness. It's amazinggg
RoundThreeFIGHT
As a female, wolfthorn by old spice is the BEST
theIdris
Agreed. It protects and smells fantastic!
NerdHerder
YES! That's what I use! It's also not too masculine-smelling
causality
Bearglove is far superior.
IgnisErus
theyre canceling it!! T_T
clumbsygrace
As a really active female: NOOOOOOOOOO!
ipetdoggos
Omg no that's the only deodorant I like D:
howboutyadontladiesandgentlemenSCOTTYDONT
Try Fiji. That stuff is orgasmic. Women regularly comment on how good I smell. Even the guys on my college baseball team fuckin love it lmao
MaybeOneDayIWillFinallyGrowAPenis
mmmm, fiji is awesome. I (female) like to use matterhorn. smells like 5.6 heavens. it's so good.
ashrynn
YES. FIJI. As a woman, if my boyfriend smells like one or both of two things (Fiji/Stetson), instant lady boner
Asaltycashew
Well hello there; I partake of the wolf of thorns by the mature spice. Shall we strike up a bit of conversation?
RoundThreeFIGHT
Clever lad
CaptainJackSbarro
Nah girl, Hawkridge, ALL THE WAY.
TheColorOfThisPenIsBLUE
ye...ye...yep. yep Yep YEPYEPYEPYEP.
itsahollyday2
Yas.
GambleGorps
http://youtu.be/zR16WVWUgnY
futterwackenfrenzy
WHERG WHERG WHERG
YouCantKeepJetpackingAwayFromYourProblemsBrian
I'd imagine this is how Dale from King of the Hill is in bed.... Hell, all four of them are prolly like that. Except Bill. He gets none.
QuantumSupersexposition
Whatisluv-babydonthurtme-nomo.wmv
shotinthehead
OH GOD YEP OOOOOHHHH GOD YEP YEP YEP......
KlumsyNinja
Maybe....maybe....maybe....maybe!....oh maybe!....maybe!
iwonderwhatthemaxusernamecharacterlimitis
Boom goes the dynamite
ireadyouremailz
yep.
doughnutty
I tell you hwat
liliputian7
SURE! ALRIGHT! THANK YOU! QUITE! THAT'S INTERESTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING
BorderlineBoozehound
OH YEAH. GO TO WORK! WHERE'S THE BEEF?
ianorsomething
I imagine this being said like the YEP in Justin Timberlake's modern masterpiece, SexyBack.
BANANAFLAKE
Nope... NopeNopeNope. *walks away.*
JustAHyperactiveFaery
Yep yep yep yep yep yep yep uh huhh... uh huhhh
Derplord
PLOT TWIST: Canada - "Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh. EHhhhh"
sarioah
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qxWGr8VhzQ
seemill
THANK YOU
youwishyouhadaunicorn
Maybe?
retrohellix
ye.
WeaponizedGuitar
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP
dorkyYorky
exactly what i was thinking with tears in my eyes
BerryTreat
YEPYEPYEP FAMILY
BoredCreep
Is anyone else thinking of the aliens from Sesame Street?
bss36504
This is from a Demitri Martin standup
Welve
All I could think of was Bill Lumbergh - he says "yeah", but in the same lazy way I would expect someone to say "yep"
BaconGod31
INDEED!!!! AAAAfermative
TheDarkLordOfTrees
QUITE. SMASHING.
Oscill8s
Quite! QUITE! Oh quite!
SpoonOfDoom
Forsooth! VERILYYY!
WillJeSuis
I can't even imagine that in a porno. It would be so weird. It would be like if the man didn't say "Oh yea!" but "Great."
MrBananaBeak
I wish the guys in porn would just shut the fuck up.
WarJesus420
God there's this one vid I really love but the amateur filming is such a fucking dork and it really annoys me
Woofypaws
http://oi51.tinypic.com/2cp2l4j.jpg
GlenL
Storage Wars porn parody
Jacksohn
Yip yip.
fishiefiasco
i came back to like this, im dying inside
Argentironi
I laughed so hard I shot snot out of my nose. Not even upset
ThatGuyWithTheTopHat
Not sure if Ducky or Hank Hill
TonyBalogna
BRRRRINGGG!!
OfficialSkynet
https://38.media.tumblr.com/a0508ff6d36d070d05161f663b544233/tumblr_mpjum9zwJX1rcjo9to1_500.gif
GoodChange
uhu, um, mhm, indubitably
musikals
Yarp.
meltymcface
NOW WE KNOW
PotatoOfTheSea
My ex did this.
Christianabanana
How it would sound if Hank Hill was having sex?
DanAgain
Calm down, Ducky.
BaconGod31
And that Tumblr post is stolen from a Dimitri Martin joke btw. Not to be a party pooper
Pharya
Everything on the internet is a repost from real life
PrincessChapstick
I love him
BrianBeerGod
Glad you said it because I was thinking it.
WarJesus420
Yep. I stopped reading the post to come here and say this. It bothers me much more than it should that this kid got laughcredits for that.
pmmeyourtitsforpuns
1 More than it should indeed. At least in this case many people know Martin said it. One should feel worse for those people who tell a joke
pmmeyourtitsforpuns
2 and one person hears it and repeats it and gets the credit for saying it.
WarJesus420
Well yea that's part of it, I feel bad for Demitri not getting credit and mad at the kid for blatantly stealing it.
asdfkeyboardman
I could imagine worse things to hear in bed:
BatmansFirstEnemyWasCalledManBat
My co-worker once banged a girl who kept saying "Oh golly".
IncognitoPanda
Delightful
TheColorOfThisPenIsBLUE
delight...delight...uhdelightful DELIGHTFUL DELIGHTFUL DELIGHTFUL
narex456
better: uhuh...uh-huh...uhuh Uhuh UHUH UHUH UHUH UHUH UHUH
WhoPaidForThisFloor
I liked this comment before I even read the post.
iatha
Fweeblies
I always imagined Dave Hesters YEE EEEEE
NorthRex
Curling hard!
Chron121
http://www.quickmeme.com/img/4d/4dc12df7fd9ddc1bb993173503f911bd9573ca4e22d528623fc3006257357c8d.jpg
breadstickez
You saved me the trouble of linking to this picture. Thank you.
chonas
fucking ducky.
Capsicle
This is funny except for the story behind the voice actress which makes everything Ducky related very sad.
botosai2001
Congratulations, you've gone and depressed me.
tombombadilf
There's a Rule 34 of it. I guarantee it.
GambleGorps
Good god what have you done?!
SteakNazisMustDie
There IS a Rule 34 of it. I know it. I wish I didn't but I do.
StephanieWasTheTrueVillainOfLazyTown
*thousand yard stare*
Rainalor
Horrible Fact: The voice actress of Ducky, Judith Barsi, was murdered at the age of 10 by her abusive sperm donor, along with her mother.
PajamaStripes
I tjough of this when I saw the picture. Made me sad. Ducky was my favorite.
VidiVeniThenSheLeft
Yep yep yep
TonyGarbanzo
Her last movie was All Dogs Go To Heaven =(
InterruptingA10
good movie
OhmygoodnessohmydamntheygoinhamOhmygoodnessohmydamntheygoinham
I was hoping that you were lying
TheBasementNerd
YES WE KNOW
sunmoonstars
You're fired.
OhmygoodnessohmydamntheygoinhamOhmygoodnessohmydamntheygoinham
But you weren't
spicyraamen
Holy shit
DrTacticalKeyboard
http://33.media.tumblr.com/f399137fb80493462baf4db4f1d4b2c2/tumblr_mfckwtmIl01qm6tzso1_400.gif
AgentFoo
Uh-huh, uh-huh.
ecorm113
That's the one I wanted to see. A+
PikaCheck
This is why I Imgur. I love you guys.
DrTacticalKeyboard
CrackingPostGromit
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BOING BOING BOING BOING.
Morebunnies
Watching those guys at a young age really prepared me for dealing with stoned people later in life.
SpoonOfDoom
And for dealing with your typical clients in IT. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vh3tuL_DVsE
PajamaStripes
This made my fucking day.
leo900101
Strangest blowjob ever.
blissblush
Bless you, my child! You have learned well
JohnnyStillNotSure
there are times that make me wish i could favorite comments
OSCgal
You and me both.
TheColorOfThisPenIsBLUE
My girlfriend ALWAYS uses my deodorant instead of hers. Just kidding I don't have a girlfriend. Or deodorant.
Bent0916
Mine stole my Old Spice. I bought it because I read girls really like it. Had her try it. It was missing two days later. Bearglove, iirc.
DeadGirlSuperstar
Getting a Girlfriend. Step 1: Shower. Step 2. Use Deodorant.
Ecxusemeisthisnametaken
Sweaty palms is a major issue, don't be ashamed.
SweenyOdd
And that, ladies and gentleman, is what we call a causal relationship.
IamMelonLordeYaYaYa
I always use men's deodorant. Works better.
Yoshiru
Actually, the REASON they are gendered is the make them to what attracts the person who is USING it.
bienmenso
You sound like an Earthbound npc
dogmatix
same thing as chicken/egg riddle
Elonth
*rubs deodorant on your right palm*
roarran
ew
BuildHerACakeOrSomething
My husband has Old Spice Wolfthorn and it smells like flippin' jelly bean sugar strawberry fruit punch so of course I use it all the time.
ImmortalAzrael
That is the least manly smelling deodorant ever. My friend told me I smelled like stripper when I used that.
TheDarkPotato
A friend's sister stole his deodorant, used that good Old Spice on herself, she had a rash under each pit for days. She never used it again.
IMadeAnAccountToSayCleverThingsButThenDidnt
This one hit me on a very personal level
howboutyadontladiesandgentlemenSCOTTYDONT
Old Spice Fiji. It's a deodorant for men, but it smells like candy and watermelons. Needless to say, my armpit game is fuckin dope.
ClairelyBearly
yes.
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howboutyadontladiesandgentlemenSCOTTYDONT
Mah nigga *internet fist bump*
sms001
Correlation does not imply causation, but in this case perhaps some further analysis may prove effective.
andIwasLikeWHAT
I was just about to say this! +1 for that
StandardDeviant
Well there's your problem
Inamortal
Yep. No deodorant.
considerimdone
YEPYEPYEPYEPYEPYEPYEPYEP
Teelitisti
You should get yourself a girlfriend to buy you some deodorant.
kilmore
exactly. everyone knows girls don't like hippies
MongoloidFARTexplosion
Not the blue penis?
IamtheGreatQueenSnugglewombs
Get girlfriend, the deodorant will follow shortly
DrAwesomeMcCool
I feel like there might be a connection between those two
Harmonex
Correlation does not imply causation.
OSCgal
But it does bear investigation.
MissRenegadeRabbit
But it sure as hell does hint at it.
ChocolateEevee
I borrowed my bf's deo and loved it so much I bought my own. Then it turned my armpits brown and I was sad. :(
ImgurnariumOfDoctorGiraffus
Way to stick to your name Chocolate Eevee
ChocolateEevee
Bwahaha! I didn't even thing about that!
BergerMan
Why/how did it turn your armpits brown?
ChocolateEevee
No idea. I guess it just didn't react well with my chemistry. I tried a couple other guy brands and it all ended the same way.
PleasantlyPlump
Guy on the first image clearly doesn't know that cocoa butter scent leads to a...happy ending
brunette7900
or is there just that many posts about jacking off with cocoa butter in general...
brunette7900
Are we all talking about the post where the guy came to the scent of cocoa butter on his friend,
PleasantlyPlump
This is the one I was referring to, yes.
DrTobogganMantisToboggan
igotthatreference.gif
Pawnderlust
Yay, a reference & I understood.
DontLoseYourWay
I miss my cocoa butter kisses...
AflyingDukie
I was looking for another Chano fan
DontLoseYourWay
Man, I think we all addicted.
AflyingDukie
cigarettes on cigarettes my momma think i stank
TheRealSickshot
Dang dang dang skeet skeet skeet she do that thang fo' three retweets (much better song)
natekelly
There are dozens of us!
verbalhermanmunster
I don't get it
PleasantlyPlump
There was a previous post where a guy hugged a girl and came. She smelled like cocoa butter.
verbalhermanmunster
Cheers
THEBESTUSERNAMEINTHEWHOLEWIDEWORLDEVERSINCETHEBEGINNINGOFTIME
What?