IfYouAreReadingThisYouAreFckingBeautiful
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Now that I have HBO Now, what should I watch?
Nov 18, 2014 7:44 PM
IfYouAreReadingThisYouAreFckingBeautiful
528153
10963
83
HufflepuffStoner
That is too damn cute.
ISayBoooooo
Well, he got the food and the toys. Who was the real winner?
MakingUpAUsernameIsTerrifying
"You aren't even a Bronzed Retriever"
abnrml
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" -All the adults ...."BALLFOODTOYFOODTREATTOYBALLTREATSQUEAKYTHINGTREAT" -Dog
peit
That golden retriever is my spirit animal <3
CylonN6
Puppy's life was made that day.
eedathinks
YLE mainittu!!
AfterOvenRyebread
Torilla tavataan!!
caffeinatedbeingbean
I promise you that dog is a winner.
ayoungerdumberronswanson
"Fail"? MOFO got all the treats and toys... FOR FREE
TerriSchiavo
OHHH A TOY, MY FAVORITE THING.... OHHH ANOTHER TOY, MY FAVORITE THING.... OH ANOTHER TOY, MY FAVORITE THING.
ISeeWhatIDidThere
Life is a journey, not a destination.
britsch
You see the Shep look down for a second though...like "nope...ill get a toy after!"
SirZak
they are called golden retardeds for a reason
shootxthexmessenger
My dog would run straight through, but only if I were at the other end because he's scared of everything and would want me to pick him up.
Schmitzz
"Stupid other dogs don't even notice all this good stuff"-Dog
ReposterCallerOuterMan
shoulda fed him before the race
fumble
They did.
mandeliondarling
Haha with a Golden that would have changed nothing.
bertttthiyass
if somebody lined a red carpet with booze, weed, steak, puppies, and pizza i dont think id make it to the end either
guppocalypse
Aw man look at this beer and food too! and whats this a joint? *smokes joint* hey puppies!
nevergoingtogiveyouupnevergoingtoletyoudown
Dog breed is less a factor here than training. Its completely ignoring her like Charizard with Ash's low badge count.
Dutchy1
Well it is more paying attention to everything, for 0.1 seconds. It obeys, for 0.1 seconds. This dog is my penis! DOWN! Okay, OOH TITS!
Banlish
Dog is like 'OOOH what's this my favorite thing, oh look my OTHER favorite thing, treats my FAVORITE THING!!, Sausages MY FAVORITE THING!!!'
ltroussel89
Haters gonna hate.. Potatoes gonna potate..Canine gonna canate
GoniMaster
Truly beautiful.
sonicblis
This had me rolling. +1
blueowl642
Schnauzers gonna schnauze.
DJBBT
I'm not here for a long time, I'm here for a good time!
SashaTheGray
As someone who was contemplating getting a GSD, Im going to add golden to my list now.
bohemiancrabcity
to hell with the win line give me some play time.
SL4pthePANCAKES
It retrieved didn't it?
Irejectyourrealityandsubstituteitwithmyown
Thank you, finally someone said it, its in its bloody name
tellemurius
It's a retriever, its suppose to grab shit. What else did these people expected? You can't easily train away a basic instinct for the dog.
Irejectyourrealityandsubstituteitwithmyown
Thank you, finally someone said it, its in its bloody name
Irejectyourrealityandsubstituteitwithmyown
Thank you, finally someone said it, its in its bloody name
australish
this, this would be my dog, plus he'd then shit and run to some one else, then try hump that person.
tzendere
So pretty much this guy? http://img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20090602035123/pixar/images/3/35/Dug-up.jpg
AuntieMeat
Well, he is a Golden Retriever.
thatguyinportland
sauce: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iTTNRE-njM
tulias
That first comment though.... Breta Lovejoy.
Glitchinthematrix
I like how the dog at the end is like "but I'm not even halfway done here!"
tooshbaboosh
HAHA I love how everyone applauds and his tails wagging like "God, I did SO good and I love everyone!"
MrChurch
I didn't know Putin was a referee.
BonerSlayer
this dog only failed at one thing. it was about giving a fuck and it clearly didn't
BonerSlayer
this dog only failed at one thing. it was about giving a fuck and it clearly didn't
astrocouldyounaut
The benny hill music makes it. That was fantastic
ugottapaythetrolltoll
Lol. I agree. As soon as that kicked in I was laffing so hard!
tehhete
You call it failure. Dog calls it success.
NotKaren
You're right, there are no losers here.
VerticalTaco
And this is the story of how my dog almost blew a year of service training.
magila
Fuck your little contest I'm eating the sausages.
SuperRockinMrMagic
It didn't shit on the carpet. SUCCESS!
ItsCaptain0bvious
"So, you want me to ignore 8 plates full of treats and run across & you will give me a tiny dog biscuit? Hm... Here's a better thought..."
twentyfiveandone
BEST DAY EVER
BootsCatsBootsCatsBootsCats
This is like the dog version of "Pie contest? Nah, man, free pie"
maybeidowantants
Jokes on the first dog, golden retriever got to eat everything and play everything. He's the true winner.
kayleo
Yes, a successful way to get sick and throw up
Aelinsaar
Seriously, this dog is just full of win.
Galdornae
Lost the race? Sure, but won my heart.
PavlovsDoge
Success would have been shitting on the red carpet for all the other dogs to smell.
sweetspot42
FUCK THE SYSTEM!!!
HappyEngineer
Is the system someone's leg?
dontgoundertheboardwalk
The dog sees the toys and foods as more interesting than you calling it. Just more practice and any dog can do this
ironsonic
months of ignoring treats during training, all in preparation of this one master heist
lastie
Now that's a heist film I would watch
itsahollyday2
Golden Deceiver
crihsagnlel
Seriously, if more people used lateral thinking, I would be a lot less pissed off
IMakeLotsOfReferencesAndRemakes
I honestly don't know what they expected... a dog called a "Retriever" tries to retrieve everything... Surprise!
astrocouldyounaut
I think the golden really is the winner here. They got ALL the treats
saltyslug
"OK, am good boy. Run to nice lady friend. Run to ni....OMG THERE IS FAVOURITE THINGS EVERYWHERE! I'M THE BEST BOY!"
professorfuzz
Dear Dogiary: "Today the humans unrolled a red carpet filled with toys and treats, all for me... today was a good day."
TheFinalDoctor
Legendary
HappyPappy01
Until he started pulling me away from it and pointing for me to leave it. I will never understand them but I love them anyway.
jkeezie
*Gray carpet
BergerMan
What a dumbass, that carpet is clearly red.... Oh wait dogs are colorblind...
jpparkenbone
They do not see in black and white though.
Zetsubou5
they are (kind of) red-green blind
OMGWTFISTHIS
Actuallllyyy, if you want to be a pecker-wood about it, it'd be yellow. They have a fucked up color blindness. :\
Skornish
Also, pecker-wood.
MatrimBloodyCauthon
I wonder if scientists will ever cure it
Skornish
Also, dogs don't understand what the red carpet even means.
whelp
Its that yellow thing on the floor.
nym23
OKAY I'LL RUN, RUN TO MY MOMMY...GO! – OH BOY! BALL BALL FOOD SQUEAKY TOY! OH BOY OH BOY SAUSAGE SAUSAGE SAUSAGE...
qwicksilfer
This would be my dog. God, pulling him off that sausage would be a herculean task.
qwicksilfer
This would be my dog. God, pulling him off that sausage would be a herculean task.
MissBunnyCake
RUNRUNRU- I'LL TAKE SOME OF THIS AND THIS YUM THIS TOO AND YES THIS!! MY FAVORITE THING! THIS AND THIS
HappyEngineer
SQUIRREL!
siler7
It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed 1/
Dogeborn
I always upvote Douglas Adams.
ravenlunartech
So long, and thanks for all the fish.
Manzellina
Don't panic.
siler7
that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much -- the wheel, New York, wars and so on -- whilst 2/
Britich
New York is nothing to be proud of.
siler7
all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed 3/
siler7
that they were far more intelligent than man -- for precisely the same reasons. -Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
ThisWasATriumph
This is so much better reading it in the narrators voice.
zerohunter
*Applause*!
UselessBlinkingWhenImThinking
+3 for commitment.
ChaosLierLen637
I will never not love this.
Griffy11
Farewell...
HowDoYouMakeAnElephantFloat
And....
Whitney189r
I've been meaning to watch that movie once again. This has compelled me to do it.
DelReyoX
The book! Read the book(s). Better, MUCH better, and there's a lot more in the books.
siler7
Watch the BBC miniseries. It's much better than the movie!
RepaidRapidDave
why not read the books
IcedBrews
dog.exe running smoothly
ThereIsNothingMoreIHateThanAnything
Chris Pratt in his dog form
derTorbs
funniest comment I have seen all day....nearly made me spit out my coffee
HappyEngineer
1: PRINT "DOG"
HappyEngineer
2: GOTO 1
Mickstah
I love this comment.
shinyRK9
well, germans are pretty much bred to completely obey their masters, no mater what is asked of them. and their dogs are pretty smart, too,
slinky104
Everyone is still a little sore about the Holocaust
jeherohaku
That one took about 20 seconds to sink in and I came back to upvote it.
NerdN1
German Shepherds focus on the job, no matter what, protect the family, do the thing, etc. Golden retrievers LOVE EVERYONE AND WANT TO PLAY!
ProphetOfTheFirstClaw
hahaha du witzbold, du bist als nächstes dran.
messabeeawesome
Pretty sure that's a Belgian Malinois, not a German Shepherd. But yeah, they're both known for that.
LordChappers
And Retreivers are bred to retreive. Job done.
ShenanigansForHireExperiencedBeerTasterAndCraicFacilitator
Joke so dark people need to eat carrots to read it.
Jackofall
almondsareimportant
http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lr4taes3Ws1qhwtr5.gif
hypostatic
Nah, the difference is that one dog is trained better than the other
H8ling
Hate to be that person but that is a Belgian Malinois.
getoffmytrain
Thanks for making me feel bad about my digorno that's being prepared right now.
SirFishPudding
Though I seem to remember them having some "race" problems as well.
hamburgerbutt
did you just
SongandTam
Bahaha I had to go back and read your first sentence again
3blkcatscvt
+1 for being clever, but I'm pretty sure that's a Belgian Malinois...
bewareofmeg
Yeah, it looks a little meatier than your average GSD
cacalynn11
Considering getting one...anyone have opinions they'd like to share??
RudyToo
I think you're right
drdavessardogs
yup, a Mechelaar for certain.
SharksNeedFoodToo
You're absolutely right.
TrumpChumpPumpDumpSumpPumpLump
Belgian Malinois FTW!
ms2ar15
Yup. Our local PD has one.
SilenceInAutumn
Except that's not a GSD, it's a Malinois. Known for their single minded focus and drive.
ms2ar15
Goldens...not so much.
SilenceInAutumn
LOL, my golden wouldn't have made it past the first tennis ball.
sneaker2
Isn't that a Belgian shepard?
thestigsfemalecousin
Looks like a Belgian Malinois to me too.
secrtagnt
It's a Belgian Malinois (shepherd). Source: My Belgian Malinois says so.
Cerinna
Go tell him he's right.
secrtagnt
It's a Belgian Malinois
fewextrathumbs
Damn right it is! And I want one
BitchButcher
As a German human, I laughed :D
demiandub
As a German shepherd, I'm surprised to have Wi-fi out here where I herd my sheep
Summersky
:looks at your name. Backs away slowly with all the female dogs: heh..heh... •___•;
BitchButcher
Hehe ...you can call me "Awkward-Username-Guy" as well.
CountVorkosigan
Lies, Germans don't experience amusement. Well known fact.
NerdN1
Monty Python did a show for Germany. One of them said "The Germans don't have a sense of humor, so they had to borrow ours." sic
BitchButcher
It's the Englishmen who have a weird kind of humour. Germans distinguish between humour and British humour. ;)
Cerinna
As a Dutch person: what the... you're like the third German with a sense of humor that I've met. What is going on over there?
BitchButcher
Maybe it's because I "visit" Venlo regulary ... but I don't say why :)
Cerinna
I can kind of guess.
ProphetOfTheFirstClaw
there are two things i just can not stand. people who are disrespectful of other peoples cultures. and the DUTCH.
Cerinna
I can't stand the Dutch all the time either. Woe is me.
Yesnomaybeyes
As a German Human with a Rottweiler, Yes.
amoeba15
Rottweilers <3
SaintMaceToTheFace
Best dogs