randomwalrus

122473 pts ยท January 17, 2014


When you are nature's perfect killing machine, it can be hard not to have an ego.

2 hours ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

...how do you tell time?

3 hours ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Preach.

4 hours ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

No, butthole. I repeat, balls in butthole.

6 hours ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Cramer is a great info source. Just do the opposite of whatever he recommends, and you'll always win.

6 hours ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

So, what you're telling me... the more bananas I eat, the more I increase the chances of destroying all of reality. Neato!

9 hours ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Personally, I say "eye ran" as I can then say "so far away" and make myself laugh.

9 hours ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Charles is the one in the air, getting throttled by Mr. Doom T. Guy.

10 hours ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 1

I think there's a goose at the door, can somebody get it? I am trying to stay in first place.

1 day ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Kinda both? They (used to) have a uniform. But now they LARP as military goons, so bring their cosplay shit from home.

1 day ago | Likes 30 Dislikes 0

I appreciate the vote of confidence, but I am just an ordinary day-today villain. Maybe once I get that fissile material, I will become super. We can hope.

1 day ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"Drive me closer, I want to hit them with my sword(s)!"

1 day ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In this economy?! You gotta.

1 day ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Like, right before? Or can I do it on the drive over?

1 day ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Now that is art.

1 day ago | Likes 26 Dislikes 0

Free fissile materials, you say? Neato. On my way.

1 day ago | Likes 73 Dislikes 1

I suplex'd a train, once.

1 day ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

But not in that order.

1 day ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

He was safer with Pee-Wee, than Neo, as Pee-Wee was a gangster, who took no shit.

1 day ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

He's just a normal guy.

1 day ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Anakin did NOT do fine. No, sir. Not fine at all.

1 day ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Both? Both.

2 days ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You're thinking of Cysex. Common mistake.

2 days ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Kitty is not open to open relationships, that's her man, and Jolene better hit the bricks.

2 days ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

"Killing Mother Fuckin' Dinosaurs, Mom!"

2 days ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Last I heard, there were only two casualties, but that was awhile ago. Also, did not say who they were. Probably the pilots.

2 days ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Never has a more truthful truth been spoken.

2 days ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

They walk single file to hide their numbers.

3 days ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

False, teethwriters are the now, old man. Typewriters are so 2025.

3 days ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I also choose her French boyfriend.

3 days ago | Likes 40 Dislikes 0