PinkGoddessAlice

948 pts ยท June 3, 2014


My cat asks me again every half hour all day long.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For me, large dose, brings all the bad stuff to the fore without the uplift/feel better at the end.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's true. But it also comes back.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Nope. I like thick guys with beards. No dude's ugly with a beard on.

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

So sorry for your loss.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I hope your day got better and there were pupper hugs for you at the end of it.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Never thought I'd actually miss this guy.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nah. Dude's not eating raw salmon.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

As a woman, I absolutely wish I could easily pee in the sink. I don't know why this could be considered wrong.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I went to high school with that dude.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When you got a tool like mine, heh heh, ya gotta build a shed over it!

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Ashlee Simpson? Izzat you? (This was the dance she did when she got caught lip syncing on SNL. )

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Mildred is pleased. ???? ???? ????

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Sending love from Whidbey Island Rocks. Your rocks are awesome!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

"Can I use your computer?" Mormon Uncle: "Yes, but don't look at porn!" Looked in his cache. Yep. Porn. Lots of it. Hypocrite.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I showed up with an eight cup glass measuring cup that fit though the hole but was turned away because it didn't have a lid. Disappointed.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

'Bout all that's left is the taint.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Why can't I ever find Amanda Hugginkiss?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

My blood boiled when the kid takes mom's salad then dropped it. Omfg, I was gonna eat that you twerp!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

He's got the eyebrows of a 2015 middle school girl.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I kept the tears in until I read this. Well done.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Probably clutching his heart thinking he's going to have to carry her drunk ass home later. She is not a tiny woman.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

C'mon! I'm desperate! Wasn't that clear?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Can you imagine the increased chance of biting your cheek with an extra nommer like that?!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

They go to special spider heaven where they get to squish people. Or take them outside if they're not too terrifying.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The dancing Dorito!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ding Bang Ow!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

How many spots are available? Your kid is so lucky.

8 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

Please consider my children in the same way I considered the children of others. What a bitch.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0