Beersapper

171203 pts ยท October 21, 2014


https://www.twitch.tv/matt_plays_poorly

It's common in gas giants over 4 billion years old.

2 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Those were the days... before Ozzy hit the hard drugs.

3 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't sleep on the Strip Club buffet!

4 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

What?

5 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And if we stop doing COVID tests, no one has COVID.

5 months ago | Likes 337 Dislikes 3

No. Ducks are savages. They swim in the Spokane River so... definitely not.
Go to better lakes, or being trash bags with you.

7 months ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

People not in or from Wisconsin do not understand. I visited family back in 21 and brought back store brand cheese, and it knocked their socks off. I said it was b-teir cheese.

8 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

The other hack is yo just put a stick of butter in your pocket and reapply to popped corn as needed. One stick should be good for two buckets.

8 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't put the "butter" on it. I learned that hack 20 years ago.

8 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 3

She always has.

8 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah, so... I don't like this.

8 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I was told I can just put em up my butt. How do I remove the squirrels who have taken up residence? I can't sleep.

8 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If you down a bottle of wine before you do it, you'll get 4x XP.

8 months ago | Likes 76 Dislikes 0

Just put it in the microwave on high for 27 minutes.

8 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Keep it up! Exponentially, no woman will ever touch you.

8 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You did, late, routine maintenance on a PC? And your toofs are also bad?
Floss your teeth.

9 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4

Maybe it was the best at the time! I wanna do it again, show her how good I got at it. 2.1 seconds and no more crying.

9 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I prefer the term 'vintage'.

9 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I knew she was telling me what I wanted to hear :(

9 months ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Me giving my date the best .7 second weinering of her life.

9 months ago | Likes 275 Dislikes 8

Shes looming at Kitiara who just killed Sturm Brightblade.

9 months ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

If the truck didn't come with nuts, its gender-affirming care.

Do vehicles not get typically female names?

9 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Being a Temu order, it keeps time on 26 hour time

9 months ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I have to pull my tag out of my pants to remember the size. 100% the reason I need a woman around. My memory is trash.

9 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 4

I can't remember this stuff about myself.

9 months ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 6

Keep the stick. Ditch the girl.

9 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4

*pasted from my iPhone*

9 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Weezers

10 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0