thepenisbIue
62723
2708
69
Mar 4, 2016 3:26 PM
thepenisbIue
62723
2708
69
ItsAGameOfSchlongs
As would i, just ask my girlfriend
OolonColuphid
Omnipresence would be my superpower
MaoZedong
The power to alter the probability of anything at will. Then you have every power ever. You win.
LoudAngryJerk
I feel you brother. I mean I don't really, not in any way whatsoever
NotHarroc
You just need the power to edit anything and everything and have it work the way you think it should. Edit your death clock or bank account.
Imgonnatipyouwell
I'd have multiple man's powers personally. Seems like the most practical. Or maybe teleporting.
AcousticGstring
Haha, damn, she's probably reading it like "whaaaaa?
idislikecomingupwithuniqueusernames
Wow, starts off strong and then just bombs himself.
EverythingThatFallsToTheGroundIsMine
The ability to turn any liquid into urine, instantly. Blood in your veins? No! Urine!
Sureletsgowiththat
Controlled dimensional travel with pinpoint accuracy. That way, theoretically, I could obtain miracle drugs, magic artifacts, weapons...1/2
Sureletsgowiththat
I would arguably have infinite power at my fingertips. 2/2
preaction
I want limited telekinesis. I want to be able to fetch things from across the room, and as I walk to work, pick up the garbage.
Kyshho
Refill things
Nahxela
Well, at least he got a response to the first question.
ThatGuyNoOneKnows
Psh, that's a damn good question
Jeepenstein
Unlimited mind control...
DukeOfChutney608
that is a good ice breaker tho
Raptorsaurus83
I would go on a date with him.
Vulpinologist
You're SHAPEshifting. You're not shifting into a completely different persona, just the appearance of something.
DJTrickyM
Yeah but if you shapeshift your brain...
willowwashere
the power to return stuff to where it belongs instantly; dishes, laundry, books, slow people in the right lane, lost pets, you get the idea
willowwashere
...punctuation... -_-
CliveBarkersMysteryHole
I would like the ability to make phone calls without having to spend an hour hyping myself up before hand.
[deleted]
[deleted]
CliveBarkersMysteryHole
https://ioneglobalgrind.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/impossible.gif?w=610&h=349
WolfPackMedic
True story
DavidMakalaster
I may be teaching grandmother to suck eggs here, but I find it helpful to write down what I want to say and any info I may need in advance.
RohBear
Time control. Not only can you stop time, but since f=ma, you also have infinitely super strength/speed.
Mistruths
Except that if you were to perform the FTL punch, your arm would immediately shatter as well. Equal and opposite.
nubs2016
Power to control and create all matter
RobOttman
Projectile Vomiting. That's the power to have. No one messes with you cause you can puke all over 'em!
EverythingThatFallsToTheGroundIsMine
I like your style.
foreverbanned
But... But... He's talking to a woman! He got his super power!!!!
insegrevious
Oh, sweet summer child....
septillion
nope, he's talking to his phone, and that phone is talking to another phone, and that phone is talking to a woman.
MasterFlippyFloppy
Not successfully, he isn't.
windedsloth
By the genie rules he got exactly what he wanted
HungryPumpkn
"I need someone as dishonest and devious as a 50,000 year old magical jerk... I wish I had a lawyer!" - Timmy
lancell
He's texting, not talking tough.
Luigisno1
Isn't that what could happen to the shapeshifters in Dragon Age Origins?
SunfireInc
Also in GoT. And wheel of time. And probably a lot of others
LiftsLikeGaston
Not to my knowledge.
ratatazonk
Kinda yes. In DAO it matters how long you turn into that respective animal. A couple of mins mights be ok, but days and they might get lost.
allofthebooks
Ditto Discworld witches 'borrowing'
bjaerven
and just about every fantasy novel that taps on shape shifting is exploiting this trope.
Athang
I read a sci fi novel that had a limitless shapeshifting alien. It literally spent a week as a stack of linoleum.
Fisticufflinks
mmmm... No. Morrigan can shape shift into a bear, a spider, and a swarm of insects, none of which have higher mental functions
allofthebooks
Celtic mysticism is different
Snooj
I had a book once about a donkey who had a magic wish pebble and he wished to be a rock and dropped the pebble was was stuck as a rock.
thestorkasaurus
It was probably a nice rock though. Maybe even in a swamp.
freegiant
Snooj
Sometimes I forget I have Google. http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/457762.Sylvester_and_the_Magic_Pebble
harleenVT
My super power. Immortal until my choosing to die. 99million years. Seems long enough
CliveBarkersMysteryHole
Then, technically, the only way you'd be able to die is by suicide.
CliveBarkersMysteryHole
Every time you went to end it you'd have to ask yourself if you actually wanted to die or if you were just having a bad day.
NotAmused1001
That's pretty much the last thought I have every day before I leave my desk at 5.
IFUCKEVERYTHING
Bruh, you ok?
NotAmused1001
Yeah. *JustWorkThings
Sgtsmack65
I would want mine to be the ability to breath under water. Cause I'm drowning in pussy
thepenisbIue
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
TakeOffYourPantsAndJackIt
If Lil, Wayne taught me anything, you need to swim to the butt
torsen8
If you're drowning in pussy, you'll still drown if your ability is to breathe underWATER. Yes, I'm fun at parties.
MatrimBloodyCauthon
Also, breathE.
YeaImFunAtParties
I'd make my superpower not needing to eat, and never being too cold or hot, then I would walk the globe sleeping in field
Koravel34
That's TWO superpowers. Cheater.
cow042
then a farmer will shoot you for sleeping in his field and spooking his animals.
DidNoOneNoticeThis
Hey at least you didn't die hungry.
Goatinacoatfloatingonaboat
This...is really fucking smart. Ok but that's two, what if you can only have one? Which is better? Thinking the cold/hot.
YeaImFunAtParties
I'd go for not having to eat, that shit is a nuisance, and say goodbye to IBS
Goatinacoatfloatingonaboat
See I figured food would be easier to get than shelter. Rent is like 500 a month, food is 200. But I guess you'd also never get fat...
tetracycloide
Add always look like you're wearing clean clothes and smell nice and you've got a plan.
YeaImFunAtParties
You'd be approaching god territory
thecactusfucker
I'd rather never be required to sleep and never tire. I'd get so much more nothing done!
NoiceSmart
Ah yes, a lifetime of feeling comfortable without depending on external resources. That WOULD be a superpower. I like this.
IMBALOIC
But is soo noice getting to cool down when hot, and feeling warmth when cold! No light without darknes my love
youlikehueylewisandthenews
Sooo... you wanna be a zombie?
YeaImFunAtParties
We're already zombies!!
shitdickin
Your body would still be taxed from exposure and you would still need to drink.
YeaImFunAtParties
Your dick really do shit?
shitdickin
Butt sex