Jan 2, 2014 5:45 PM
334638
11358
994
hellafordays
Your good-looks will get you through this. That, and the nap.
kcloud
Twist: you work in Japan and you now look very very dedicated.
judithmyers
Just act like you're fixing something under there. When u get back up, look at your screen and say, There that's better.
introdevious
this is what you call the "oh fuck" face
pornonthecob
I recognize that face. That is the face of utter terror.
CanadianRedneck
Is there an alarm clock in your desk?
Bombideer
Time to call in a bomb threat
dontlookatthe
Dexter??!?
kallan0100
You poor bastard.
iLikeStuffToo
i hope your boss isn't on imgur
bzdug
Where's your giant black piece of foam core to act as a false wall between your chair and the partition? http://imgur.com/LyQ7qdJ
CloudyHero
We want the end of the story !!
casinomama
OP is a fake:( He steals stories and tries to get to the front page
somedude525
Lets hope he doesn't bring in the grandkids too George.
PatchouIi
Oh my god, this cracked me up so much you made me log in just to upvote you.
01000100011011110110011101100101
now jump out and yell Suprise
GBMaker
*Surprise
you win this time...
Katie0721
Just curious, will you be signing up for the imgur dating site...?
Gorillaabs
George Costanza style
THScam2009
If I dose off at work and someone notices, I just lift my head slowly and say, "amen". Works every time.
Sue43
I want a job where i can take a nap under the desk and no one notice!
Opie8
"Where is he, I just wanted to give him a late Christmas bonus!?" http://imgur.com/Xd3Qcqb
jeanralphiosaperstein
Call in a bomb threat!
thefriskywalrus
tokomak
This looks like it's Nick Park. Is this Nick Park? Where can I have this Nick Park?
ScruffyBelievesInThisCompany
Scientist in an adventure with Pirates. Something like that, too lazy to search the proper name. Hilarity ensues.
mycouchpullsout
HIDE!
Actually, you're already in the perfect hiding spot. STAY!
misslola
Emerge and loudly proclaim, "I cannot find it! I give up!" Then claim you heard a squeak, saw a roach, etc and were searching.
Witmonger
Instructions unclear, stood up and shouted "Dammit, I couldn't find my roach!"
hannavas
Searching! On my back. For two hours!
So you'd be known as the obsessive guy, but not "sleeps under his desk" guy.
The best thing is: it comes much closer to the truth.
sarapls
A real life Costanza. Call in a bomb threat.
yesthisislion
My CEO did that on my first day at work. My trousers fell down...
WeiblesWobbles
plot twist: you're not really employed, you were just getting ready for a wank!
I wish! Thankfully there were only two other people in my dept's office at the time...
Yverras
"fell"
mynameisnotimportant
Your first day?! You ballsy man.
I'd lost abotu 2 stone in weight and my jeans no longer fitted. I really needed a belt. Thankfully, I have one now!
IdLikeToBuyAllYourChocolate
Do you work for Yahoo?
Nope!
anakin1729
All my friends at Yahoo collectively orgasmed when the name of the new CEO was announced.
alpoopy
So you kept the job aye?
Yeah, he just told me to buy a belt.
jwilson16
http://imgur.com/eqJPasJ
ihavecurlyhaironmyhead
I watched Pretty Woman tonight and seeing Jason Alexander's face right now is very upsetting.
Nail260
Love that episode!
TastyStatistician
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W__qCFWi1KA
pandajerk
Hello, I am the CEO. Those are my shoes. You are fired.
hippocampus
unfortunately I am the high king of skyrim
ILostIt
pandajerk? that is an unlikely CEO username. more like headpandajerk, yeah i'd believe you then
Kastovin
Hello, yes this is dog.
keithtjr
Hi CEO, I'm dad
HannibalPoopsPeople
classic dadjoke
imsohungryrightnow
OP is from reddit. Better head over there to find him, boss man.
headpandajerk
intelliswag
No, I am Spartac--Er, the CEO. Those are my shoes. You are fired.
stuckintheoffice
well played
yerglion
you sir, are very relevant
MajorMustard
Oh my God, the dedication! I'm dying +1
[deleted]
ThomKlanc
>pandajerk --> headpandajerk
did you just...use my comment...i-is this what it feels like to be a father?
zanstar
#FearSelfie
girlyoutalktomuchshuddup
hey can someone tell me how to sign up for imgur social?
Whodat54
an acceptable selfie application.
YourGod
*#Selfear
saxyrugby
Can confirm CEO, those are very nice CEO shoes
BlueberryJohnson
#FearFart (LOUD Style)
PandaPartyPlus
I wish people would spell out "hashtag" instead
TheWolf277
lol
ImGur8
Selfear
Miller92Time
* /r/FearSelfie
coincidenceithinknot
This is when Insatiable Desire to Move kicks in.
deebr
the newest on a very short list of ways a selfie can make the front page
NinjasStoleMyMama
And then the CEO went to Imgur during his lunch and saw you on the front page..
shuckinsfuzzy
"during his lunch"
ok.. so he checked imgur when he got on the elevator to go down 1 floor.
Maniko
Or by checking his smartphone while waiting
AntiDownVoteActivist
Be very... very... still. Their vision is based on movement.
Lolmarty
Do you mean they can't read? Because letters are definitely not moving.
kevohulio23
If you can't see them, they can't see you
LesbianWieners
CEOs uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh find a way.
very...very.. quiet. CEO's hunting young secretaries. For the good of the company.
IchitheKira
the lack of it
Guitaren
And remember, the CEO is just as afraid of you, as you are of it.
stillcleaning
Be vewy vewy quiet.
TheNamesAshHousewares
Your boss will..uh..will find a way..
Damnit! Didn't read far enough down. Posted similar comment. Shame.
much bro fist, such friendship, so Wow!
RatBasil
Thank you for this. Jurassic Park references make me happy.
TheRicM
talkingrock
Damn you.
purplechaps1787
Someone else must be watching the Jurassic Park marathon today!
iaccidentallybuiltafirewhileiwassleepwalking
There is a Jurassic Park 3D screening at my local movie theater! (...to celebrate New Year or "because why the fuck not it's Jurassic Park")
IKnowTheGuacIsExtra
THERE WAS A MARATHON?!
MadScienceAndAlchemy
"If you find yourself cornered by a boss, do not show fear to it. Stand and try to make yourself look as large as possible." (1/2)
sillypinkpanda
I can't stop laughing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FP8nFZs0-Ys Source: "Office Survival," SMBC Theater
fenix849
I think i need more SMBC comic, didn't pay all that much attention to it because I've mostly been an xkcd guy but that was some funny stuff.
Juggler
It's actually based on synergy, but points for effort.
PillaPlease
I'm too tired to laugh as hard as you deserve. For that one.
Synergy, outside the box, cross-functional teams... corporate buzzwords make me drink.
pr0nty
Touch base, moving forward . . . *downs another shot*
JasperSirGalahad
Economies of scale, lean supply chain, ROI
TheBreaux
Thought leadership.
supinebovine
Leadership focus.
BaconKitty
From Reddit: OP is a big fat phony
Fishbasket
WebmMP4notGif
It's like finding out how a magic trick works. Party pooper.
FrenchyVonRichter
EatTheSheep
My rule of thumb: When in doubt upvote the comments you like and leave the post without a vote. #trustnoone
MobileSuitFundam
http://mrwgifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Just-Go-On-The-Internet-And-Tell-Lies-Meme-Gif.gif
harleyran94
You really think someone would do that? Just go on the internet and lie?
calmchowder
I don't believe it. OP has never lied to us before!
RockEmSockEmRobot
Oh well.still made me laugh
highest scoring comment ever is for being a party pooper here! lol yay me, I guess that's why people call them out on Imgur haha
rozstar
upvoted, then took back my upvote
CorgisButtsDriveMeNuts
Oh no, dickhead and/or moron on reddit, it can't be happening!
unoriginalusername
how dare theeeeey lol
Radioactiv369
DoingMyKanyeBest
Now theres only EVERY OTHER IMAGE ON IMGUR to prove...
captaincampbell
May be a phony, but he followed it up with an AMA, so he's a BAMF
TuMadre
bodu!!!!
UrpiArvasti
Phony maybe but fat?
is a reference to Family Guy, too lazy to look up the gif
TheGoldenElephant
Yes ok this one might be fake. But sometimes similar stories happen on two places of the world. A lot o people on this planet y'know.
Stabbybaby
PITCHFORKS SOUND LIKE A GOOD IDEA
enneque
And torches!!
IAmAFlyingCamelPleasedToMeetYouPleaseIgnoreTheCrane
TORCHFORKS! OR PITCHTORCHES!
mariosx
HEY EVERYONE, THAT GUY IS A PHONY. A BIG FAT PHONY
TOTOAFRICA
WASN'T GONNA JUMP? YOU'RE A PHONY! HEY EVERYBODY THIS GUY'S A GREAT BIG PHONY!
howToLoseTheGame
Is this somehow a reference to Holden Caulfield?
no no http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2cXQbPMHvE
dwightkschrutebeetfarmer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXBFre683dA
Toulla
Dont't know why you've been downvoted, it's a Holden word.
PvtWaffles
hellooooo, is that czech i spy?
Ahoj! lol not really, I do live in the Czech rep. but I'm not Czech, ok maybe a bit, been living here for quite some time now
Fantastic! I'm not from the Czech rep., but i visit there often and i love it dearly. Tesi me (add accents which i don't have).
hahahahaha yeah I know the language is a bitch, I almost had a meltdown when I learned they don't have the 'ing' form for progressive tense
for me, it was 'Ř'. Prague is amazing. The villages are awesome. People are fun. Women are beautiful. SKŘIN is a bitch of a word.
SkittleBomb
Oh man, nothing on the internet is true anymore.
mfabros
Obligatory
LiveGrenade
True dat
Mechanekton
And so the paradox begins.
Hovenbeet
Only Wikipedia
You had me worried for a second here, man :D
differently
Just like the gang house safe, thats a lie.. *cries* It's a lie right?
First rule of the safe: we do not talk about safe.
treekiddo
yup OP found a bunch of $ he cleared the damn thing out and fled to mexico leaving a locked door of disappointment for his friend to find
It all makes sense now... The pieces are falling together... It's all starting to click.... The story is starting to become true... Im done.
hellafordays
Your good-looks will get you through this. That, and the nap.
kcloud
Twist: you work in Japan and you now look very very dedicated.
judithmyers
Just act like you're fixing something under there. When u get back up, look at your screen and say, There that's better.
introdevious
this is what you call the "oh fuck" face
pornonthecob
I recognize that face. That is the face of utter terror.
CanadianRedneck
Is there an alarm clock in your desk?
Bombideer
Time to call in a bomb threat
dontlookatthe
Dexter??!?
kallan0100
You poor bastard.
iLikeStuffToo
i hope your boss isn't on imgur
bzdug
Where's your giant black piece of foam core to act as a false wall between your chair and the partition? http://imgur.com/LyQ7qdJ
CloudyHero
We want the end of the story !!
casinomama
OP is a fake:( He steals stories and tries to get to the front page
somedude525
Lets hope he doesn't bring in the grandkids too George.
PatchouIi
Oh my god, this cracked me up so much you made me log in just to upvote you.
01000100011011110110011101100101
now jump out and yell Suprise
GBMaker
*Surprise
01000100011011110110011101100101
you win this time...
Katie0721
Just curious, will you be signing up for the imgur dating site...?
Gorillaabs
George Costanza style
THScam2009
If I dose off at work and someone notices, I just lift my head slowly and say, "amen". Works every time.
Sue43
I want a job where i can take a nap under the desk and no one notice!
Opie8
"Where is he, I just wanted to give him a late Christmas bonus!?" http://imgur.com/Xd3Qcqb
jeanralphiosaperstein
Call in a bomb threat!
thefriskywalrus
tokomak
This looks like it's Nick Park. Is this Nick Park? Where can I have this Nick Park?
ScruffyBelievesInThisCompany
Scientist in an adventure with Pirates. Something like that, too lazy to search the proper name. Hilarity ensues.
mycouchpullsout
HIDE!
mycouchpullsout
Actually, you're already in the perfect hiding spot. STAY!
misslola
Emerge and loudly proclaim, "I cannot find it! I give up!" Then claim you heard a squeak, saw a roach, etc and were searching.
Witmonger
Instructions unclear, stood up and shouted "Dammit, I couldn't find my roach!"
hannavas
Searching! On my back. For two hours!
misslola
So you'd be known as the obsessive guy, but not "sleeps under his desk" guy.
hannavas
The best thing is: it comes much closer to the truth.
sarapls
A real life Costanza. Call in a bomb threat.
yesthisislion
My CEO did that on my first day at work. My trousers fell down...
WeiblesWobbles
plot twist: you're not really employed, you were just getting ready for a wank!
yesthisislion
I wish! Thankfully there were only two other people in my dept's office at the time...
Yverras
"fell"
mynameisnotimportant
Your first day?! You ballsy man.
yesthisislion
I'd lost abotu 2 stone in weight and my jeans no longer fitted. I really needed a belt. Thankfully, I have one now!
IdLikeToBuyAllYourChocolate
Do you work for Yahoo?
yesthisislion
Nope!
anakin1729
All my friends at Yahoo collectively orgasmed when the name of the new CEO was announced.
alpoopy
So you kept the job aye?
yesthisislion
Yeah, he just told me to buy a belt.
jwilson16
http://imgur.com/eqJPasJ
ihavecurlyhaironmyhead
I watched Pretty Woman tonight and seeing Jason Alexander's face right now is very upsetting.
Nail260
Love that episode!
TastyStatistician
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W__qCFWi1KA
pandajerk
Hello, I am the CEO. Those are my shoes. You are fired.
hippocampus
unfortunately I am the high king of skyrim
ILostIt
pandajerk? that is an unlikely CEO username. more like headpandajerk, yeah i'd believe you then
Kastovin
Hello, yes this is dog.
keithtjr
Hi CEO, I'm dad
HannibalPoopsPeople
classic dadjoke
imsohungryrightnow
OP is from reddit. Better head over there to find him, boss man.
headpandajerk
Hello, I am the CEO. Those are my shoes. You are fired.
intelliswag
No, I am Spartac--Er, the CEO. Those are my shoes. You are fired.
stuckintheoffice
well played
yerglion
you sir, are very relevant
MajorMustard
Oh my God, the dedication! I'm dying +1
[deleted]
[deleted]
ThomKlanc
>pandajerk --> headpandajerk
ILostIt
did you just...use my comment...i-is this what it feels like to be a father?
zanstar
#FearSelfie
girlyoutalktomuchshuddup
hey can someone tell me how to sign up for imgur social?
Whodat54
an acceptable selfie application.
YourGod
*#Selfear
saxyrugby
Can confirm CEO, those are very nice CEO shoes
BlueberryJohnson
#FearFart (LOUD Style)
PandaPartyPlus
I wish people would spell out "hashtag" instead
TheWolf277
lol
ImGur8
Selfear
Miller92Time
* /r/FearSelfie
coincidenceithinknot
This is when Insatiable Desire to Move kicks in.
deebr
the newest on a very short list of ways a selfie can make the front page
NinjasStoleMyMama
And then the CEO went to Imgur during his lunch and saw you on the front page..
shuckinsfuzzy
"during his lunch"
NinjasStoleMyMama
ok.. so he checked imgur when he got on the elevator to go down 1 floor.
Maniko
Or by checking his smartphone while waiting
AntiDownVoteActivist
Be very... very... still. Their vision is based on movement.
Lolmarty
Do you mean they can't read? Because letters are definitely not moving.
kevohulio23
If you can't see them, they can't see you
LesbianWieners
CEOs uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh find a way.
NinjasStoleMyMama
very...very.. quiet. CEO's hunting young secretaries. For the good of the company.
IchitheKira
the lack of it
Guitaren
And remember, the CEO is just as afraid of you, as you are of it.
stillcleaning
Be vewy vewy quiet.
TheNamesAshHousewares
Your boss will..uh..will find a way..
LesbianWieners
Damnit! Didn't read far enough down. Posted similar comment. Shame.
TheNamesAshHousewares
much bro fist, such friendship, so Wow!
RatBasil
Thank you for this. Jurassic Park references make me happy.
TheRicM
talkingrock
Damn you.
purplechaps1787
Someone else must be watching the Jurassic Park marathon today!
iaccidentallybuiltafirewhileiwassleepwalking
There is a Jurassic Park 3D screening at my local movie theater! (...to celebrate New Year or "because why the fuck not it's Jurassic Park")
IKnowTheGuacIsExtra
THERE WAS A MARATHON?!
MadScienceAndAlchemy
"If you find yourself cornered by a boss, do not show fear to it. Stand and try to make yourself look as large as possible." (1/2)
sillypinkpanda
I can't stop laughing
MadScienceAndAlchemy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FP8nFZs0-Ys Source: "Office Survival," SMBC Theater
fenix849
I think i need more SMBC comic, didn't pay all that much attention to it because I've mostly been an xkcd guy but that was some funny stuff.
Juggler
It's actually based on synergy, but points for effort.
PillaPlease
I'm too tired to laugh as hard as you deserve. For that one.
shuckinsfuzzy
Synergy, outside the box, cross-functional teams... corporate buzzwords make me drink.
pr0nty
Touch base, moving forward . . . *downs another shot*
JasperSirGalahad
Economies of scale, lean supply chain, ROI
TheBreaux
Thought leadership.
supinebovine
Leadership focus.
BaconKitty
From Reddit: OP is a big fat phony
Fishbasket
WebmMP4notGif
It's like finding out how a magic trick works. Party pooper.
FrenchyVonRichter
EatTheSheep
My rule of thumb: When in doubt upvote the comments you like and leave the post without a vote. #trustnoone
MobileSuitFundam
http://mrwgifs.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/Just-Go-On-The-Internet-And-Tell-Lies-Meme-Gif.gif
harleyran94
You really think someone would do that? Just go on the internet and lie?
calmchowder
I don't believe it. OP has never lied to us before!
RockEmSockEmRobot
Oh well.still made me laugh
BaconKitty
highest scoring comment ever is for being a party pooper here! lol yay me, I guess that's why people call them out on Imgur haha
rozstar
upvoted, then took back my upvote
CorgisButtsDriveMeNuts
Oh no, dickhead and/or moron on reddit, it can't be happening!
unoriginalusername
BaconKitty
how dare theeeeey lol
Radioactiv369
DoingMyKanyeBest
Now theres only EVERY OTHER IMAGE ON IMGUR to prove...
captaincampbell
May be a phony, but he followed it up with an AMA, so he's a BAMF
TuMadre
bodu!!!!
UrpiArvasti
Phony maybe but fat?
BaconKitty
is a reference to Family Guy, too lazy to look up the gif
TheGoldenElephant
Yes ok this one might be fake. But sometimes similar stories happen on two places of the world. A lot o people on this planet y'know.
Stabbybaby
PITCHFORKS SOUND LIKE A GOOD IDEA
enneque
And torches!!
IAmAFlyingCamelPleasedToMeetYouPleaseIgnoreTheCrane
TORCHFORKS! OR PITCHTORCHES!
mariosx
HEY EVERYONE, THAT GUY IS A PHONY. A BIG FAT PHONY
TOTOAFRICA
WASN'T GONNA JUMP? YOU'RE A PHONY! HEY EVERYBODY THIS GUY'S A GREAT BIG PHONY!
howToLoseTheGame
Is this somehow a reference to Holden Caulfield?
mariosx
no no http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2cXQbPMHvE
dwightkschrutebeetfarmer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXBFre683dA
Toulla
Dont't know why you've been downvoted, it's a Holden word.
PvtWaffles
hellooooo, is that czech i spy?
BaconKitty
Ahoj! lol not really, I do live in the Czech rep. but I'm not Czech, ok maybe a bit, been living here for quite some time now
PvtWaffles
Fantastic! I'm not from the Czech rep., but i visit there often and i love it dearly. Tesi me (add accents which i don't have).
BaconKitty
hahahahaha yeah I know the language is a bitch, I almost had a meltdown when I learned they don't have the 'ing' form for progressive tense
PvtWaffles
for me, it was 'Ř'. Prague is amazing. The villages are awesome. People are fun. Women are beautiful. SKŘIN is a bitch of a word.
SkittleBomb
Oh man, nothing on the internet is true anymore.
mfabros
Obligatory
LiveGrenade
True dat
Mechanekton
And so the paradox begins.
Hovenbeet
Only Wikipedia
Hovenbeet
SkittleBomb
You had me worried for a second here, man :D
differently
Just like the gang house safe, thats a lie.. *cries* It's a lie right?
SkittleBomb
First rule of the safe: we do not talk about safe.
treekiddo
yup OP found a bunch of $ he cleared the damn thing out and fled to mexico leaving a locked door of disappointment for his friend to find
differently
It all makes sense now... The pieces are falling together... It's all starting to click.... The story is starting to become true... Im done.