anlyin
232392
8097
97
The way to handle the news
Jan 14, 2018 12:45 AM
anlyin
232392
8097
97
Cornflakes91
+1 for dad
smashpro1
Dude is a fucking legend.
LiquidFire3
ogdoad
"Duck and Cover" a new kind of duck prosciutto omelette?
ShaunDreclin
If North Korea isn't dealt with soon, the next alarm could very well be impending doom.
Rips4w
This mirrors my view on doomsday scenarios. Just gimme some good food, a cold beer and a front row seat.
SearchingInProgress
can i join?
GrayWhiteWolf
Plot twist: his dad was on a diet and this ruined 5 months of hard work
AspartameDaddy
There's a lot wrong with this comment.
EdgardoVelez
He does have a point.
gayrat5
People in Hawaii
v
lettersandnumbers808
Truth
teh0khardic
theychangedthatquick
This made me realize I had no idea what to do in this situation. For the first time ever, I was scared for my life.
sodachick500
Why did it take almost 40 minutes for them to send the false alarm notification? That's a long time for panic.
lettersandnumbers808
The alarm was automated to reach everyone, there wasn't an available automated message to say false alarm
Bubba83443
Doesn’t fully apply given the bigger picture but reminds me of a quote “ calm people live, panicked people die”
AspartameDaddy
But everyone dies.
Krasnopeev
Unless you're on Oahu or Maui, there is not much reason to be concerned. Me, big island, are more than likely safe
ohDannyBoi
Anyone know why that alert went out in the first place?
TheDivineUsersub
In short, someone hit the wrong button... think he'll lose his job?
reginald1648
Maybe he spilt his covfefe?
ZepTheNooBVersionTwo
Might as well stay where you are if you don't know where the missile is gonna hit.
GuardsmanMiku
Not at all. Assuming it's nuclear, If the missile lands on top of you you're fucked, but if its further away shelter is extremely important
Firetowerdude
Yup. Fairly survivable if not at the epicenter thankfully.
MistressLyda
Yeah, but for what future? Pretty much just waiting for the cancer to hit you in some years? I can understand that some don't bother.
Firetowerdude
Well only if it's a total world-wide war. Then you're kinda screwed. If it's a few blasts? Hunker down. Is survivable by far.
TheIrishman35
My dad is there on business too. I asked him the same thing. He said he went to the beach because no one would be there.
fairybug
Was he right?
ReaLifeSmeagol
Hell it's probably the safest place there. Not like the beach is going to be targeted, and if it's a nuke you're dead anyway.
TuggSpeedmann
You’d get a hell of a tan too
WaterblightGanon
and if no one else is there he could go skinny dipping
kayakhero
I love how he says the line went down. Not that it cleared
LordScrublord
If there was an ICBM comin for me I would just sit down and play videogames until I was thrust into oblivion.
BromegaShenron
Dad level over 1000
tReasonoustRump
Over 100
fairybug
Your scouter's upside-down. It's not 1,006, it's 9,001.
IAmAngry
Dad level +972
APisMOSTFIRE
Troll level 1000
aZestyEggRoll
9000*
[deleted]
[deleted]
Roshiro
Is that hiw the dad reacted?
JerryWhinefeld
WHAT, NINE THOUSAND!? THERE'S NO WAY THAT CAN BE RIGHT!
DavveZ
8000* before translation
haunanz808
I was working and once this hit, it cleared out entire restaurant out. We all ended up huddled in the backroom until we got a all clear.
MuhammedGarza
Do you mean your dad traveled to Hawaii for vacation?
BrazilianThunderPanda
My auntie made coffee and sat under her dining room table. She was mad she woke up early for nothing.
TheDispossessed
she's awesome
SemiBrutalOne
Kona for the win
SemiBrutalOne
Coffee that is
BeeDragon
I also like Kona Brewing Co beer.
alsoAzrael
Not entirely sure what the table would have done, but I guess it can't hurt.
YellowJelloNomer
Is there anything you can actually do in this type of situation?
IamTheSherm
IrishBarBalm
Devouring an entire buffet seems more fun than hiding in a freezer or under a desk. Good for him.
Hyippy
Ugh thanks for reminding me about Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. A FUCKING FRIDGE
thegreatatuin
Fun fact: Back To The Future (produced by Spielberg) was originally meant to feature a time travelling fridge instead of a Delorean /1
thegreatatuin
The film was to climax with Marty using the power of a 1950s nuclear test to run the flux capacitor. The idea was dropped but Spielberg 2/
thegreatatuin
Kept the idea, to use later in Crystal Skull.
Muffyns
But why
pookieeatworld
Less than a mile from the bomb. Don't forget that.
emparier
I would’ve done the same. Trapped in an island and I can’t outrun a missile so...
ReaLifeSmeagol
20 minutes is enough time to dig a decent hole.
mac821
and then get buried alive in it by debris? id rather be vaporized tbh
GuardsmanMiku
why do people just assume nuclear bombs are this magic weapon that eradicates everything within a precise distance and dont taper out
emparier
Gee idk maybe because the only ones ever witnessed by civilians have done just that...
GuardsmanMiku
Wrong. Like any explosion it gets weaker the further away you are. No matter the size, there will always be a point where shelter matters
emparier
Oh shit sorry doctor!
Deadpangod3
I don’t think Hawaii is big enough for that...
czbagel
Breakfast food as a last meal wouldn't be too bad
Vagabondream
Yeah but buffet bacon and scrambled eggs are always terrible.
TheMadOnion
Breakfast is usually the meal I skip because I hate it so much. I would literally just eat all the bacon they have. Hahaha.
imaginaryPeppers
I love breakfast. Best part of the day.
shamrock124
A lifetime of breakfast food.
Qbertzilla88
bacon baby
Alyrenna
Friend of mine is stationed in Hawaii, he said his roommate was afraid his last meal was going to be a lunchables
TobySomething
Plus all the calories are free
BadamWarlock
"Well... Guess this is my cheat day."
ChopSake
If you gotta go, go with a belly full of breakfast sausage
biglongandgirthyusername
I would be fucking happy about it, dying just after having a wonderful meal? Sign me up
Daqonium
czbagel
I wish I could upvote Ron Swanson twice
ikindafail
Yeah but from a buffet rather than fresh :(
BearBombs
czbagel
Picture of me like every week at brunch
LEEEEROOOOYYYJEEEENNNKIIIINNNS
As long as it was at a nice hotel. I’ve had some shitty hotel breakfast.
GronkIsTheSoundAGronkMakes
First, last, middle. Not too bad at all.
redbob5k
Live by the bacon, die by the bacon. Thats the way to go
Jimmyn6
How is that on a t-shirt yet?
o4kill
ribs are breakfast food :)
winsZero
Infinite breakfast food
SlackerTactical
Not infinite. Just a lifetime supply.
Combatmatt
All the bacon
BarretXIII
the buffet I used to go to had super creamy mac n cheese. bacon n mac, in an unlimited supply, for my last meal sounds epic!
ChronologicalMyopia
Getting to a shelter, secure area is a good idea. Close your windows, doors, and stay away from the windows. There's a few possible outcomes
IamTheSherm
Lock yourself in an old refrigerator.
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
Don't forget the note on the fridge door ~ "Please unlock within half an hour"
ChronologicalMyopia
Also, all that being said, I honestly believe the threat of a first strike on the part of North Korea to be near zero.
ChronologicalMyopia
NK BMs will be accurate as stones, so if you're within the blast area, unless you happen to be in a hardened shelter, not much you can do.
GuardsmanMiku
theres not one finite blast area you realise, it tapers out. Theres a sizeable region where small amount of shelter will save your life
ChronologicalMyopia
Likely, you won't be in the blast, but radioactive dust could be a threat. If your house is intact try to cover all major vents and leaks.
Krasnopeev
Well if the trade winds are right, and the missile hit only Oahu, other islands would be fine. Oahu is the main target anyways
ChronologicalMyopia
Limit time outside to getting to transportation when an all clear is sounded, and heading to your nearest evacuation/medical center.
Roland191145
What would you do? Me? I'm pouring a drink, snuggling with my dogs, and enjoying my last moments. Nuclear war isn't like the Fallout games
ShaunDreclin
Yup. I live in civilization, I'll take a pass on living post apocalypse.
nunyabidnesstwats
If someone nukes someone everyone nukes each other. Everyones gonna be dead except for a few people in New Zealand who will just sit 1/2
nunyabidnesstwats
2/2 around wishing Australia still existed cause now they have no one to make fun of.
nunyabidnesstwats
Have a wank go out in style.
skelitor120
To be fair, if we see Nuclear war in our lifetime, 100% of us are gonna be the oddly-posed pre-war skeletons clutching vodka and money
IReviewDickPics
Or more accurately, sitting at a laptop or on a phone as we're browsing Imgur.
Roland191145
Who has money?!?!
teknojo
Of course not. The fallout games are what happens AFTER the nuclear war. Bring on the post nuclear apocalypse!
mac821
odds are that you, me, and a good 80% of all people wouldnt survive an all out nuclear war. but then again, the odds of that war are low too
GuardsmanMiku
and most of those 80% are people like you that dont bother to hide
teknojo
Oh, I would hide. Second that text hit my phone I would be hauling ass away from the nearest military installation & down a hole.
teknojo
I mean, I now the odds are terrible, but I am going to try.
worldsokayestspeler
As someone about to move to hawaii, are there a lot of ballistic missile threats?
dc808
More tsunami threats than missile
kila
No. More likely: major hurricanes, earthquakes, power outages. Many military bases for Hawaii defense.
HeatherBranson
Its within range of North Korea, so...
pugglesworth
In the last 10ish years I've been around this is as close as they've come to an actual threat I'm pretty sure
Krasnopeev
Not really past 5 years this is probably the first time. Plus, unless you move to Oahu then it's fine. No need to worry really
Keklebum
This is the first time I've ever seen anything like this in my last 10-15 years here. No worries.
WhereArtThouMyTesticles
No. Natives say 'How's It?' instead of 'How's It Going?' Musubi is delicious. People are more friendly and courteous than the mainland. 101
Krasnopeev
Musubis suck. Maybe just cause there's no variety on big island
Krasnopeev
Haha it depends on the people. I've met many locals who aren't friendly even When you just walk past them. Like anywhere else.
mmurrbles
No and there never has been it was an accident instead of send out "this is a test of the emergency" they sent out "this is a missile"
TheDivineUsersub
I hope that guy lost his job. That's a huge fuck up lol.
waitwuh
at the same time, the event really does put some things in perspective....
AlcoholicsAnonymousBYO
"Back to Private for you Sergeant" - Captain in charge of missile alerts, probably
ArtOfKarolMichalec
Yeah “an accident” for sure
SwashbucklingForJustice
Never going to happen. About 10 unlikely things would have to happen in quick sequence. Complete irrationality of the Kim Jon Un regime, ...
SwashbucklingForJustice
...failure of any whistleblowers, shitty missles hitting tergets, and missle defense failing.
TuggSpeedmann
And by missile defense failing - a shitload of interceptor rockets miss and the rapid trajectory scramblers from satellites fail.
ReaLifeSmeagol
Um. Not sure rational and NK should be in the same sentence.
ChainmailleAddict
Un's all bark. He knows the instant he attacks the U.S., we'll turn his country into the world's largest parking lot.
LiterallyYourMom
Those would have to be some very careful strikes so as not to affect the surrounding nations.
toboldlygowherenomanhasgonebefore
Imho that guy is acting totally rational. We may not like how he's acting (I do not), but this is a strategy geared toward his own populace.
soejmud
I think they are more rational than your president. Missile program for self defence, clearing out internal threats to the leaders power ..
soejmud
Now right before olympia it's all sunshine, cooperation, and when that's done, so are their missiles. Clever, in a way.
RaynWisp
I'm not convinced. I think a lot of NKs actions have been to quell potential threats in-house and our perspective is on the outside... 1/2
RaynWisp
looking in. Not saying I agree with them, but their political realities are far different than our own. 2/2