WeaponizedCrumbs

13962 pts ยท October 6, 2016


I once yelled "EGGPLANT TALKING SHIT!" at my bf that woke me up.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

What did the fox say?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Soft cucumbers are the worst.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Not sure if I'm more impressed by the belt knife or the double denim...

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I totally get it. Waiting for my mother in law to go... as she talks to herself and watches the porniest stuff she can on my Netflix -_-

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

***not enough butter

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Working ice cream machine in a McDonald's???

7 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I thought they were in blenders

7 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Dt Orlando's always a good time.

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You're a wizard Hairy.

7 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

7 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

That bear tho...

7 years ago | Likes 56 Dislikes 1

then a few hours later I got a text telling me I'd be paid through my intended resignation date LMAO THANKS FOR PAYING ME TO JOB HUNT!

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

ME TOO! When they saw my resignation they said EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY! Which totally screwed them bc of the projects I was working

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And they smell like they've already died 0.o

7 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

I did this! But on a mountain! In CO! On a snow trail! With trail mix! Next time I'll be more prepared to make wild bird friends on hikes.

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

SO MUCH CHEEK!

7 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Upvote for birbolution.

7 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"They're friendly but if they come to close just hit them with da shampoo"- Carl

7 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The people nuked the emus or the emus bombed the people?... those are 2 very different endings

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There was a second emu war??? I'm an uninformed American learning all this for the first time...

7 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Thank you for making my Monday morning uncomfortable first thing. Everything else is uphill from here...

7 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

It makes me itchy looking at it

7 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

My ovaries grew ovaries.

7 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

All I remember about the dwemer ruins was glitching out... over and over and over and over...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dis is mine.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

If toes are beans then what are nipples?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0