SMASPTP

9146 pts ยท December 4, 2015


Something about myself.

Someone, please... just explain to him how capital letters work.

3 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Shitty, yes. Illegal, no. MSRP stands for manufacturer SUGGESTED retail price.

3 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This is hella disappointing. Jason was always my fave. Spent hours arguing at recess about why he was better than Tommy!

3 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Elon's desperate Iust to be a funny Twitter guy is reaching critical mass.

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Damn, nothing harsher than having your girlfriend turn on you.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I wonder what other past presidents have had to say about Mr. Putin.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm more impatient for Thorn of Emberlain than I am Winds of Winter. You're killin' me, Scott.

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Just went through a crushing breakup with a very ill person. Can't let it get to you, man. Hope that she finds help, but try to move on.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Gay, poor atheists, unite! *High-five*

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I like people not seeing my face. People tend to agree.

4 years ago | Likes 41 Dislikes 8

Joke's on us. He'll finish decomposing before he ever sees a cell.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

She looks like she's about to roll up her sleeve and slap me. But I guess I have been naughty... Whoa. Kinda went somewhere else for a sec.

4 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 4

My very generous aunt is our landlady, so our rent is $600 a month. And we're still fucking broke.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That is a superb "Every crush I had from 2001 to 2007" costume.

4 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

I'm gonna watch porn and play video games even harder.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In his defense... his mom's pretty hot.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Gary was from my hometown. We just put up a new monument to him a couple months ago.

4 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Uh-oh, sounds like this snowflake is triggered. Better get them to a safe space.

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm walking to work in the dark in an hour. I should have skipped this post.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I like 'em squishy.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Folks like this are the reason the C word should remain in common parlance. Dude's a cunt.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

... My life is so fucking boring.

4 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 2

Yeah, but what if it comes SATURDAY? Not worth the risk, man.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I like when he shoots the dude in the junk.

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I've been binging Ryan George stuff all day, and now I suddenly feel uneasy. Are you watching me, meme dump?

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Heck, I'll even give you three. *Thinks* Yep, still cool.

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0