MRW I feel slutty for banging two chicks in the same week
When you see butthole on usersub but you click on it too late
MRW some fool tries to smoke me for my 8 ball jacket
MRW I see my wayward son
Right after you say "Bloody Mary" 3 times in front of the bathroom mirror with only a candle as your light source
When he's about to suck it but you decide to fly away instead
HS is a bitch (Google at your own risk)
How many people have done this before?
When you see a repost and you're like "hey, wait a second..."
MRW I find out they are out of bacon wrapped jalapeno poppers
MRW I see a Trump sticker on my coworker's car
MRW I get a 4 day weekend
MRW the vicodin kicks in
Elsbeth Tascioni
Selfie induced sadness
MRW I make eye contact with a girl using the abductor at the gym
Farrokh Bulsara on how to stop masturbating
The local police department when BLM decides to protest in town
MRW a girl asks me what I'm thinking about and I'm trying to play hard to get
When your midget visits you in jail but you forgot to pay him for the week and you can't cut a check until you get out
MFW I gotta get my 3 piece and kick some ass.
MRW a nigga says I'm not turtley enough for the turtle club
MRW I overhear my grandma saying I'm her most handsome grandchild
When they play my mixtape in Canada
Seriously, this isn't twitter...
Jesus is like, "Are you kidding me right now bro bros?"
When you watch a TV show/play/movie and a character you like coughs into something and looks at it and sees blood
Unpopular Opinion Puffin UK Edition
To be fair, I like everything Whedon does but this is a good show
MRW I ask a friend to bring soda to my NYE party and he shows up with a 12 pack of Diet Mountain Dew
World Star and Chill
When someone makes a Mexican joke and you're PC as fuck
Anyone remember this episode of Buffy?
When you ask Sarah about favorites folders again
What happens when you play the brown note
Nerdy roommate made pancakes that look like TARDIS from Stargate SG-1!
Good Guy Greg in America
$35 and a six pack to my name
When they want OC but I just send a repost
Can a nigga get a table dance?
When you run around a corner with morning wood and they are serving free waffles down the hall.
My kids don't even know