15655 pts ยท August 14, 2017
I believe other highly social animals like wolves have similar rules for reproduction. They survive as a species bc many tend to the few, thus increasing chance of survival while also keeping the consumption of precious food/calories low in total for the group. Babies sometimes require a LOT of care and calories to raise to adulthood and therefore controlled family planning (the pill/instinct/social order) is essential for survival. Who knew babies could be detrimental to a society!
Yeah, just bc a girl somewhere along the long process of puberty can technically get pregnant doesn't mean it's healthy or in her (or the baby's) best interest. And highly social creatures often place limits on things like who can or should mate. Ex: meerkats may be fertile but only the highest ranking female in a family is allowed to be pregnant, with the other adults tasked with raising the pups. Any other preg female is cast out of the group to die along with her pups.
True, but I'd rather be guilty of performing an abortion than guilty of murder. But it's also easy for me to say when I'm not even a doctor. I wonder if any doctors are performing illegal abortions in their private practice off the record. Probably a lot harder to hide it in the technology era.
Actually, I take that back. Vaginal birth and c-section are the only outcome for every pregnancy that wasn't already ended in spontaneous or elective abortion. So all pregnancies result in pain and trauma ("natural" or not) to reproductive organs that requires some form of medical care to support a safe healing process and effective pain management.
Um no. I'd say ending a pregnancy outside of a medical emergency should be preventative care. All pregnancies increase the risk of developing or worsening health conditions, mental illness, and death. All of them. Some mothers might not experience harm to their health after birth and healing, but the moment they became pregnant, the risk grew. If someone just wants an abortion for the mere reason of preventing health issues, they should have that right.
I wonder if there is any way to get around the law and just fudge the medical file enough to meet "necessity" of an abortion. Or do they have people monitoring all miscarrying patients to prevent that?
If medical staff refused a blood transfusion that resulted in death of a mom and esp a baby, you know heads would roll. This happening over a fetus already dying or dead is infuriating.
Momma Doctor Jones is an OBGYN who practiced in Texas for years. She and her family moved abroad, but she has some videos on the laws and politics in Texas being so dangerous. Definitely recommend her channel.
*torn
Women with fertility issues must be so town between building a family and facing a situation like this. Some have several miscarriages in their lifetime. With my missed miscarriage (MMC), I carried my baby for 2 weeks before knowing something was wrong, then another two (by choice) bc I wanted to 'birth' the baby using meds in the comfort of my own home and to grieve privately. My body kept holding onto that baby, so I needed a D&E. I didn't worry for my life, but I'm also in NJ.
Who looks like she's already a mother to at least one child (didnt read the article yet). I cannot imagine the heartache of her partner and child(ren) going from the building excitement of welcoming a new baby--thinking of names and cute matching sibling outfits, etc---then all of a sudden there's no baby and then. Bam. No mommy anymore. No partner. Absolutely heartbreaking and traumatic for the family to lose so much at once.
Good point
Idk, I think there's a teensy chance a dog could prioritize feeding a piglet if the dog was a nursing foster mama to the piglet from a young age. And even then...probably only if the mama was already fed and full. So, put that money on party tricks taught by a human.
Can I ask for a friend even if I have no friends?
Forgot to include we were all about 15, but still old enough to know what is right and wrong, and how to open their damned mouths and make it clear that behavior is unacceptable.
(Simplified for brevity) The issue isn't that black friends need white friends to protect them or a host friend needs his friends to protect his carpet from shit. It's that all friends should call out others for fucked up behavior and hold each other to the standard of being a decent fucking human being. When more than half your friends see fucked up bhvr and do nothing, they are quietly giving the okay and making that behavior acceptable. (3)
...they should have already known the behavior was wrong, vocalize that it was wrong and unacceptable, and then socially chastised him and/or defriended him until he apologized and made an effort to change. Similar to not tolerating racism. Most know it's wrong and if someone says something racist to hurt another, most people make it clear that that bhvr is not acceptable. Or not tolerating shitting on someone's carpet: most would call the person out and say it's fucked up, etc (2)
A more personal example related to my op: I was actively being sexually assaulted via a "joke/play wrestle" when at my friend's house with 2-3 other guy friends. I kept telling him to get off and to stop. Not a single one of those friends called him out at any time. They watched and (maybe uncomfortably) chuckled, but did not tell him to stop. It hurts just thinking about how alone & abandoned I felt. And while the issue seems like they should have protected me, the actual issue is (1)
Ah, it was meant metaphoically and not tied so much to OPs post. Women and minorities seem to "scream" (i.e. petitioning, protests, lawsuits, promoting awareness, suggesting legislation, etc.) "for help" (societal change like ppl actually giving a fuck instead of ignoring the issues). Real life women don't need real life men to protect them. That's just a poor excuse for a bandaid. The issue is not enough people, particularly men, care enough to actually do something to prevent the violence.
Ew wtf is wrong with people? I get that more covert racism is "harder" to moderate (it shouldn't be), but that person's post is so obviously not okay. I hope, even if it doesn't work, you can report the post itself if you didn't already. That's so messed up, but good on you for speaking out, esp considering how hurtful that post must be for black members of the neighborhood. My mixed family lived next to an older couple who fly a confederate flag...and they have mixed grandkids visit them..
Oof, that's a good point. Wish we had gov funded child care. But finding another position close by sounds like the best option. Yet, I know it's also not always the easiest to do esp if you happen to rely on your current job for benefits like health insurance. The way employment works in the US is so fucked.
Of course the data is going to show that it's not cost effective. It's more cost effective to treat employees with respect, good benefits and leave time, etc, but that doesn't seem to matter to big corps. They prefer to pay employees as little as possible and threaten to fire them for minor misteps or for daring to call out sick, and then pay for high turnover rates than to actually invest in their employees. It's a power play. Similar to housing the homeless is cheaper than not. It's sick.
Can those thick condomlike bags be used as condoms if you're in a pinch?
Thank you!!!!! It's so rare that I feel heard when I talk about this sort of thing with male friends and such. Even with my own husband at times. Most just react like "oh that sucks" and don't really give it more attention bc it has "nothing" to do with them. It's like screaming for help and people just walking by, maybe taking a second to frown in sympathy, but continuing on nonetheless. Keep passing that message around to male friends and family.
Jfc. You sure it wasn't the op who deleted your comment? (I don't use nextdoor much so not sure this is a possibility)
It's a lot of extra steps, but what if you installed some plexiglass in front of the TV? Might save your screen and your ears.
I'm going to guess dry bc they seem to have kept their shape despite some possible chewing. If wet, orbeez split apart into minced jello of sorts when squished or damaged. But my dog would probably swallow wet orbeez whole in a matter of seconds, so guess it depends on how the dog eats their food.
Well, it's harder to squeeze every last drop out of workers when they aren't being monitored and micromanaged. Sure, they can still try with wfh but it's going to be harder.
"You didn't pay me then and you aren't paying me now, so the answer is still no." Unless they paid for your commute to and from, this logic makes no sense and is exploitative.
It's okay if changing environments helps you. If you tend to stress about work while at home, and it's negatively impacting you, then something needs to change. Going back into the office, renting office space, having a "work only" office in your home, etc. I think it's important to have the choice of in-office or wfh without pressure to do either. Problem is the wfh option is at risk of being removed so there is no choice. We must fight for these options.
I believe other highly social animals like wolves have similar rules for reproduction. They survive as a species bc many tend to the few, thus increasing chance of survival while also keeping the consumption of precious food/calories low in total for the group. Babies sometimes require a LOT of care and calories to raise to adulthood and therefore controlled family planning (the pill/instinct/social order) is essential for survival. Who knew babies could be detrimental to a society!
Yeah, just bc a girl somewhere along the long process of puberty can technically get pregnant doesn't mean it's healthy or in her (or the baby's) best interest. And highly social creatures often place limits on things like who can or should mate. Ex: meerkats may be fertile but only the highest ranking female in a family is allowed to be pregnant, with the other adults tasked with raising the pups. Any other preg female is cast out of the group to die along with her pups.
True, but I'd rather be guilty of performing an abortion than guilty of murder. But it's also easy for me to say when I'm not even a doctor. I wonder if any doctors are performing illegal abortions in their private practice off the record. Probably a lot harder to hide it in the technology era.
Actually, I take that back. Vaginal birth and c-section are the only outcome for every pregnancy that wasn't already ended in spontaneous or elective abortion. So all pregnancies result in pain and trauma ("natural" or not) to reproductive organs that requires some form of medical care to support a safe healing process and effective pain management.
Um no. I'd say ending a pregnancy outside of a medical emergency should be preventative care. All pregnancies increase the risk of developing or worsening health conditions, mental illness, and death. All of them. Some mothers might not experience harm to their health after birth and healing, but the moment they became pregnant, the risk grew. If someone just wants an abortion for the mere reason of preventing health issues, they should have that right.
I wonder if there is any way to get around the law and just fudge the medical file enough to meet "necessity" of an abortion. Or do they have people monitoring all miscarrying patients to prevent that?
If medical staff refused a blood transfusion that resulted in death of a mom and esp a baby, you know heads would roll. This happening over a fetus already dying or dead is infuriating.
Momma Doctor Jones is an OBGYN who practiced in Texas for years. She and her family moved abroad, but she has some videos on the laws and politics in Texas being so dangerous. Definitely recommend her channel.
*torn
Women with fertility issues must be so town between building a family and facing a situation like this. Some have several miscarriages in their lifetime. With my missed miscarriage (MMC), I carried my baby for 2 weeks before knowing something was wrong, then another two (by choice) bc I wanted to 'birth' the baby using meds in the comfort of my own home and to grieve privately. My body kept holding onto that baby, so I needed a D&E. I didn't worry for my life, but I'm also in NJ.
Who looks like she's already a mother to at least one child (didnt read the article yet). I cannot imagine the heartache of her partner and child(ren) going from the building excitement of welcoming a new baby--thinking of names and cute matching sibling outfits, etc---then all of a sudden there's no baby and then. Bam. No mommy anymore. No partner. Absolutely heartbreaking and traumatic for the family to lose so much at once.
Good point
Idk, I think there's a teensy chance a dog could prioritize feeding a piglet if the dog was a nursing foster mama to the piglet from a young age. And even then...probably only if the mama was already fed and full. So, put that money on party tricks taught by a human.
Can I ask for a friend even if I have no friends?
Forgot to include we were all about 15, but still old enough to know what is right and wrong, and how to open their damned mouths and make it clear that behavior is unacceptable.
(Simplified for brevity) The issue isn't that black friends need white friends to protect them or a host friend needs his friends to protect his carpet from shit. It's that all friends should call out others for fucked up behavior and hold each other to the standard of being a decent fucking human being. When more than half your friends see fucked up bhvr and do nothing, they are quietly giving the okay and making that behavior acceptable. (3)
...they should have already known the behavior was wrong, vocalize that it was wrong and unacceptable, and then socially chastised him and/or defriended him until he apologized and made an effort to change. Similar to not tolerating racism. Most know it's wrong and if someone says something racist to hurt another, most people make it clear that that bhvr is not acceptable. Or not tolerating shitting on someone's carpet: most would call the person out and say it's fucked up, etc (2)
A more personal example related to my op: I was actively being sexually assaulted via a "joke/play wrestle" when at my friend's house with 2-3 other guy friends. I kept telling him to get off and to stop. Not a single one of those friends called him out at any time. They watched and (maybe uncomfortably) chuckled, but did not tell him to stop. It hurts just thinking about how alone & abandoned I felt. And while the issue seems like they should have protected me, the actual issue is (1)
Ah, it was meant metaphoically and not tied so much to OPs post. Women and minorities seem to "scream" (i.e. petitioning, protests, lawsuits, promoting awareness, suggesting legislation, etc.) "for help" (societal change like ppl actually giving a fuck instead of ignoring the issues). Real life women don't need real life men to protect them. That's just a poor excuse for a bandaid. The issue is not enough people, particularly men, care enough to actually do something to prevent the violence.
Ew wtf is wrong with people? I get that more covert racism is "harder" to moderate (it shouldn't be), but that person's post is so obviously not okay. I hope, even if it doesn't work, you can report the post itself if you didn't already. That's so messed up, but good on you for speaking out, esp considering how hurtful that post must be for black members of the neighborhood. My mixed family lived next to an older couple who fly a confederate flag...and they have mixed grandkids visit them..
Oof, that's a good point. Wish we had gov funded child care. But finding another position close by sounds like the best option. Yet, I know it's also not always the easiest to do esp if you happen to rely on your current job for benefits like health insurance. The way employment works in the US is so fucked.
Of course the data is going to show that it's not cost effective. It's more cost effective to treat employees with respect, good benefits and leave time, etc, but that doesn't seem to matter to big corps. They prefer to pay employees as little as possible and threaten to fire them for minor misteps or for daring to call out sick, and then pay for high turnover rates than to actually invest in their employees. It's a power play. Similar to housing the homeless is cheaper than not. It's sick.
Can those thick condomlike bags be used as condoms if you're in a pinch?
Thank you!!!!! It's so rare that I feel heard when I talk about this sort of thing with male friends and such. Even with my own husband at times. Most just react like "oh that sucks" and don't really give it more attention bc it has "nothing" to do with them. It's like screaming for help and people just walking by, maybe taking a second to frown in sympathy, but continuing on nonetheless. Keep passing that message around to male friends and family.
Jfc. You sure it wasn't the op who deleted your comment? (I don't use nextdoor much so not sure this is a possibility)
It's a lot of extra steps, but what if you installed some plexiglass in front of the TV? Might save your screen and your ears.
I'm going to guess dry bc they seem to have kept their shape despite some possible chewing. If wet, orbeez split apart into minced jello of sorts when squished or damaged. But my dog would probably swallow wet orbeez whole in a matter of seconds, so guess it depends on how the dog eats their food.
Well, it's harder to squeeze every last drop out of workers when they aren't being monitored and micromanaged. Sure, they can still try with wfh but it's going to be harder.
"You didn't pay me then and you aren't paying me now, so the answer is still no." Unless they paid for your commute to and from, this logic makes no sense and is exploitative.
It's okay if changing environments helps you. If you tend to stress about work while at home, and it's negatively impacting you, then something needs to change. Going back into the office, renting office space, having a "work only" office in your home, etc. I think it's important to have the choice of in-office or wfh without pressure to do either. Problem is the wfh option is at risk of being removed so there is no choice. We must fight for these options.