PMMENUDES

7487 pts · October 25, 2014

I'd like to own an ant-eater bear someday. not to show to my friends or parade around my neighborhood or even use it as a topic of conversation. Just knowing, after a long ass day at work or getting some bad news, that i have an animal specifically designed to eat ants would be immensely comforting. like a safety blanket of fur and ant-annihilation. i think i would spend a lot of my money and free time designing and growing different types of ant colonies in my back yard, fenced off from my bear. then, if he does something really cool like a trick or something i'd let him into one of the ant colonies. i'd probably measure his tongue too and maybe freeze his sperm and try to breed him with other ant eater like from a zoo or something just to see how many baby ant eaters he can make and if hey knew without any guidance how to eat ants like not watching their parents do it just like out of complete instinct they would know to eat ants. i'd have to make a tiny colony just for them then. probably have to research different types of ants. i would try and see if some of my friends wanted some of the baby bears and i guess i'd have to give one to the zoo for letting me use the mom in the first place. maybe in like a 100 years people wont ask just ask "are you a dog or cat person?" they'll ask "are you a dog, cat, or ant eater person?" and that'll reveal more about their personality than anything else like who to marry or if someone is secretly racist or a dormant homosexual.