LaserCheese

8305 pts · May 20, 2014


Just found out two weeks ago I have stage 4 kidney cancer that has spread to my lungs, spine, and pelvis. I’m in my 40’s. With an 8 year old daughter. It’s pretty fuckin’ surreal, my friend. I have no wisdom or advice… I don’t even know what to say to myself.

4 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Surprisingly accurate.

6 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Actual question: how does one collect enough cat piss to fill a water balloon? That seems a monumental task.

8 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I have a helmet with similar patterns that I keep on a shelf in my office as a reminder. I landed face first and walked away. Yay helmets!!!

9 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This is literally my wife right now, except she’s not blonde. She made English muffins last night with her second jar of starter. They were fantastic.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have been married 10 years today!!! Anniversary twins!!!

1 year ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Same here! I have a slightly different model, but the dang thing won’t quit. It’s a beast!

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Mad King has Rob Schneider vibes.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Yeah, but we have lots of guns to protect us from getting sick. Checkmate, hockey-boy.

1 year ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Nice, but that is not king fu training.

1 year ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

“Ever seen?” This ain’t ancient tech, bro. Used to use one every day.

1 year ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Imagine that from the bugs’ POV. Terrifying.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I saw the pic and thought, “ElbowDeepInAHorse should see this.” Then I checked the username. Guess I can move on now.

1 year ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I’m paying for Grandma’s assisted living care because her social security doesn’t even cover 50% of the cost. And if I apply for a state facility they will move her 100 miles away to a shitty dump.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Pinky and The Brain had a teleporter accident.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

Oooh! I live in Arizona; where can I get one?

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Come on make it Mac tonight! It was a very strange ad run.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I have always preferred smaller boobs. And my wife has huge double D’s. Dont get me wrong, I love those too, but smaller boobs are fantastic!

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Was that Dwayne Dibbley?!?!

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

I actually had a manager at Albertsons that would schedule 8.5 hour shifts so that we could only take a half hour lunch. We all took an hour anyway because he was a dick.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The worst for me was when I worked nights and Saturday night was like my Friday as I had Sunday/Monday off. I would stop at the store at 6:30 am on Sunday to buy some beers and some places wouldn’t sell it to me, and instead give me dirty looks. And there was this evangelical lady that always tried to change my heathen ways. Like dude, I’m going home from work to get tipsy and play Fallout 3.

2 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 0

Dang, I went to downvote it but apparently I already had years ago.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Looks like someone stuck googly eyes on him.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I appreciate the info! I went down a slight rabbit hole looking that up and it is fascinating.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I had never heard that so I looked it up. And, apparently, according to Dr. Ulrich Schneider, at negative absolute temperature “the gas is not colder than zero Kelvin, but hotter.” ?1

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

As a husband, I can confirm that is enough. Or a crotch graze. That’s always hot.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah… I actually work in marketing for a police training company, and we avoid this type of thing as much as possible. Weapons training is a part of police training, but not like this. Not like this.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0