MFW I'm almost out of pee-pee money.
4
2
260
Being alive is awesome enough compared to the alternative
10
9
1003
It came as a shock since I feel I dodged a bullet with it not working out and I'm more optimistic about the future than ever.
5143
322
221239
"One of us" means different things to different people.
26
30
160
I've felt aimless lately...like I wasn't being my best self. I decided to do something about it.
16
12
1042
I dunno what more you people want from me.
-6
4
43
I miss you, big guy!
36
18
1704
I also used to save pictures I liked on AOL floppy disks.
50
38
228
They don't really teach you this in school, but it's important public health information.
14
24
131
Imagine a dude is doing cosplay in a trench coat and then Fry is like
-4
4
163
I tried to give this smoking hot teenage bimbo a snickers and he looked at me like I was the devil
-7
6
836
Halloween is a weird time
-1
12
204
I also thought that seeing their own blood made them incredibly angry
-5
6
840
TFW Daddy is bae
-4
6
286
Wait until that melon ripens sometimes people make hasty choices
3
78
229
Journalists should continue publishing allegations and outing perverts like Linda
-7
9
513
Where is he the Waldo please?
3
3
247
freaky freaky
40
49
2713
I get it he's gay and that's kinda gross but his movies are still alright
-6
22
345
Extraterrestrials successfully bred with humans a few decades ago, but their offspring have one noticeable difference.
28
23
220
It's been a week why won't he come before us and clear his good name?
6
25
96
"I'm vegan" might be the same thing as "I've been kidnapped"
33
20
608
He growin on me
0
7
174
It happened just the other day...
-4
9
137
I've banged all kinds of people, but at the end of the day...
-3
22
532
When she decides to make eye contact while rolling dice
5
11
807
The gud ole days
1
8
203
She can have a career but she should see marriage and family in her future along with those career goals.
1
6
488
MRW I get a flu shot
-5
16
451
They can't decide if they want to be dependent or independent and they literally walk on fences
1
15
99
I'm not exactly sure how the rotation works is it by states won or percentage of popular vote? What date does Johnson go in?
18
62
80
When the principal wants to see you after class
6
3
397
TFW you remember Halloween
-2
0
293
MRW someone asks me who my crush is
-4
3
142
Pretty much
1
4
178
MRW someone asks me why my posts are so cringey
0
6
317
Fighting crime in the streets together
2
7
129
MRW someone accuses my friend of rape and I start to defend him but then he tells me to curb my enthusiasm and I realize he's been a monster this whole time only I never saw because I wasn't his prey
20
9
933
When you tryin to grab puss but her friend checks you
-6
11
212
MRW someone calls me a jackass, but in reality I was just trying to jack some ass
-3
5
151
MRW I'm finally getting out of a rut and my toxic ex says we should talk about getting back together
98
14
4249
Show me what you got
-5
7
70
I can't make gifs
3
2
174
How can you succeed if you don't know how to define success?
1
8
168
Calm the fuck down, you animals.
-1
0
143
You don't blame the dog, you blame the master race.
-3
3
127
Travel Stories: The Will-o'-the-wisp.
-3
0
146