DickHardPointGuardRetard

580 pts ยท January 29, 2018


I'm just an undercover lifeguard with a couple dirty secrets and a handfull of business cards.

Ive blasted a few Smurfettes. Can confirm.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Explain

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Someone get that kid. He's psychic!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'd like 17, to be exact

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

I wanna fuck her till my dick smells like wasabi...

8 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 15

School shootings get me hard...

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 6

If Tunga "cliick click" spray, the water will "click cloop" stay! -Billy Mays

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you can get pumped up about a school shooting, but not take 10 minutes outta your day to watch Sean White win Gold. You're unAmerican.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 15

Wood band

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Ohhhh Emmma I love youuuuu Emma ohhh f**ck Emma... Ohhh Emmuhhhhh."

8 years ago | Likes 44 Dislikes 36

Host Malone! Qumero, numero uno...

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ya... Except Messi > Ronaldo

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Gotta pull the heat out with ice. Do not pop blister

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ice pack

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You wanna know how I got these malaMARS?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ive seen her nude tho...

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

As a hardcore Simpson fan... +1

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Lol feggit

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ping Me Long Time

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It should have said "It's what we doo."

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That look insanely similar to the moment the roofies kick in.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah Cindy, it's me- Paul. Just sittin here checkin out the shower selfies on my sister...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I just got a Tanya Hardon

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 11

Lol I'm glad he made one last smart decision... To Peep that dead life.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Why would I need a scope if Im literally going to point it at my head?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 4