Kats8652
135309
3356
77
Jan 21, 2020 6:10 AM
Kats8652
135309
3356
77
Sassmachine
Isn't the ending of the book Bilbo getting knocked out? Then someone tells him what happened?
Silas007
By now I made it a habbit to watch this masterpiece of an autopsy and mention it at every excuse I get: https://youtu.be/uTRUQ-RKfUs
IThinkYouGotAFineBrainJack
That looks like she sacrificed him for the Soul Stone.
Phischstaebchen
I think the ears are a huge turn on....
bigguywhokills
The Hobbit Trilogy: An Exercise in Deus Ex Machina.
LeviathanOmega
The Hobbit Trilogy: When You Milk The Cow that's actually a chicken.
jfaraday
ingram0079
Be thankfully that they did not put in a black elf.
temotodochi
Dark Elves do exist in Tolkiens universe, but are not in the movies.
longwalkoffashortpeir
Book.....it wasn’t in the book.
DB4289
I never read much of the books and I still thought "Am I still watching the same movie?"
temotodochi
Did you read the apendixes of LOTR and unfinished tales as well? The movie was not just about the book hobbit, but everything that happened during that time that Tolkien wrote about.
bripi
Ok, fair enuf. But I thought it worked, and I was entertained. And I don't spit on Peter Jackson's work with LOTR, even for details.
imyourrealdad
I just watched the animated Hobbit movie from the 70s for the first time. Badly animated musical 75 minute movie was a hundred times better.
Krackajak78
Ohh I thought she meant buttsecks
manowar669
I can't believe Jackson allowed this shit show love triangle BS.
TryNotToPanic
While I really disliked everything about her forced arc I appreciate the idea of elves and love. You live forever, why commit to anything?
TryNotToPanic
I enjoy the concept that it’s so alien to them that when it happens it’s like: “ahhh... Ahhh! Why!?”
herzatz
It's funny because I find Tauriel story arc wasn't the worst thing of the trilogy...
Inimposter
Yup. That's some of the best explanations for how bad that whole thing was.
PeteThePerv
The hobbits films are bad.
TheBitSlinger
I feel thin, like a book stretched over three movies.
temotodochi
Even if the movie was made from material of 5 books?
JohnnyHotnuts
Hobbit should have just been two movies - extended excessive battle scenes ruined it IMO.
S4GL0RD
The books episodic writing supports multiple movies pretty well. They just ran out of time with 2 and 3.
gandraw
There wasn't really a natural cutting point for three movies. Two movies would've worked after Smaug's death.
gecko08
Well that and the corporate overlords wouldnt step off of the creative process and let the actual writers and artists make it.
Lichelf
It would have fit better as a tv series though.
TheAnswerIsPie
I can read the hobbit in less time than the movies
AtsaMattaForMe
bandashee
She's cute and all but the actress even stated she didn't want a romance bc it wasn't in the books.
mycleverusernameisthis
I had a huge crush on her.
PrehistoricCocksman
*have
mycleverusernameisthis
imakesoft
Me too but I LOST it.
Foffer
sitarhero
https://imgur.com/0tVNzsW
SilentScreamsX
I liked the LotR movies because the books were needlessly long and the movies got to the point. With The Hobbit it's the other way around.
0000013
Producers of LOTR: ok we have a plot that is long and complex, dividing into multiple plot lines. Let’s carefully try to fit it to 3 movies.
0000013
“Producers” of hobbit: ok we have very simple straight adventure plot. Let’s add ridiculous amount of stupid cgi, checkbox characters and
0000013
Totally irrelevant side plots and video game bad guys to extend it into 3-movie slog fest.
BrayerIncognito
Jackson wanted to do 2 film's, started shooting as if it was 2 and then MGM demanded a 3rd...cuz $$$
0000013
The fact jackson wanted 2 to begin with was already bloat
SuperChochip
What you think they shoulda just made ONE movie? DID YOU READ THE HOBBIT?!
Kuplar
Her dialogue is so nonsensical. I think Jacksons team is good at converting Tolkien work to film, but not very good at making their own.
Radix865
So kinda like Game of Thrones crew...
Kuplar
Yeah but at least with GoT you had separate seasons. These movies it's *goodline-cringe-goodline". I still love them just cuz of the world.
Drath101
Should've been two movies in order to cut the filler, otherwise reasonably well made movies
Shitheid
But the 1977 version did it in one
sevendragonsandababy
*Lindsey Ellis intensifies*
BrayerIncognito
It was going to be 2, Jackson even said so. MGM wanted to milk it as they had $$ issues, so PJ had to add a ton of filler to stretch it...
BrayerIncognito
..the 1st film would have ended when the company 1st met Bard after escaping down the river.
lMrBodybagl
Or kept it 3, take out filer and fix the pacing. Boom, done.
Drath101
The filler will have been there... Because they wanted it to be 3 films? To pack it with non filler would take much more new stufd
MoepsDump
I mean they could've just added the stuff from the book they left out...
loltard
The book has 300 pages
textilelover
They put in some stuff from the Silmarillion and other writings. Radagast isn't in the Hobbit, but I'm glad he was in the films.
AlwaysTrustTheManInABigWhiteVan
Not compared to the LotR ones. The amount of green screen gave me a headache. Good actors and music though.
SuprisedPikachuFace
Yea everyone is complaining about the cgi characters but they looked fine to me, it was the sets and backgrounds that looked worse to me.
AnonKneeMoose
That was because WB only gave PJ 1 year pre-production. Not enough time to make dual-sets and prosthetics.
SergeantTerryJeffords
Half of it would have been improved by benny hill music
aldamiriel
>Tolkien and quality media lover brain: I hate Tauriel her character is pointless and forced >Lesbian brain: shoot me pretty lady
Jinxies
I feel you on that!
Rabenstein
Same
BlackCatCasper
The character’s name is Kate from LOST
Gremlynn4023
*mean pretty lady
whatpassesforclever
Are lesbians attracted to male elves?
AnthonyJanthonyFell
I mean I sure am but I can't speak for everyone. Thranduil, Aaravos and Runaan bitches
aldamiriel
I fucking hate that you named all my gay friends’ top male picks ????
Thesaya
As a lesbian, the men I find attractive are usually androgynous ones, so elves are right up my alley.
aldamiriel
SAME. Lesbians can have a lil animated androgynous men as a treat
Imsworntocarryyourburdens
She thought he was a female dwarf since his beard was so insubstantial.
mattihase
I imagine it's pretty obvious for elf lesbians.
Jinxies
elfbians
OutOfStock
Are straight men attracted to male elves?
shadowex3
No but god damn I want gimli's beard conditioner
whatpassesforclever
This is why I ask.
stevencloser
Yes.
MASSIVESPACEMONKEY
Probably.
FreshBundleOfStick
Nuttsy
So long as they're not dwarven men, probably.
redmangc
Have you seen Male Elves
bigguywhokills
Best answer ever! Have some Reddit gold.... oh.
PersonenschadenImGleisbett
beaubrent
I enjoyed the hobbit films.
Creature224
I agree, but completely ridiculous
Wellshiet
Fair enough, some people just have bad taste.
dragonsnot
Good for you. Don't let people shit on your parade...
Frankmate
Me too :)
AlwaysTrustTheManInABigWhiteVan
I might have if I didn't have the LotR movies or the book to compare them to.
dxt6191
Martin as bilbo was fucking perfect. And Cumberbatch as smaug was just delight. Rest was meh
S4GL0RD
How dare you have an opinion!
incubisexual
They're fun! I *love* fun, terrible action movies.
swedishpancakeswithlingonberries
I too enjoyed the movies, I also love the books.
vudak
I really like them. I even got the extended editions of them all - enjoyed them even more during EE viewings too.
vudak
Also re-read the book last year and still think the movies were good. Smaug did jack shit in the book - he was way better in the movie.
vudak
I can understand people having issue with tauriel and whatnot, but I don't mind it myself - so they don't detract from the experience :)
GoSens
Sure you can enjoy them as a movie but it had tenuous correlation to the book. Some people would have preferred a more faithful adaptation
Shoelebubba
Benefits of not having read the book beforehand. That aside the pacing across the 3 movies was...weird. 1/2
Shoelebubba
Biggest one was the end of the 2nd and the start of the 3rd. Cuts off before a climax, 3rd starts at the climax then resets 20 minutes in
Yojoo
I thought the first one was damn good, but 2 and 3 bored me.
thisismyaccountforwork
exactly I actually fell asleep in the theater for part of the third on because I found it just so... empty
BennyJ89
Same. Never mind the add-ins. Let's just enjoy some fun action movies!
Foffer
I liked the first 1 alright. But the 2 after could have been 1 movie imo.
MrXistentialCrisis
IMO they just packed to much content and forced storylines in 3 movies. If they stuck to the book, they could’ve done fine with two movies.
zeniarose
Agreed. I was disappointed at how fast Smaug was dealt with in the third. Doing everything in 2 films probably would have been better.
nugo520
I always thought 2 2 and a half hour movies would have been the best way to do. that being said I still really enjoyed these movies a lot
Telashar
So did I. In all honesty people care way too much about similarity between books and movies. Bbok is a book, movie is a movie.
Telashar
You can enjoy both if you want. I love Tolkien, and I mean both trilogy, silmarillion and hobbit. But that does not mean I cant enjoy movies
chiefrunswithscissors
The cgi was mind bendingly fkn awful
SuprisedPikachuFace
For the tech available in 2012, it's not that bad. Like Smaug for example was quite realistic imo.
Slydevil13
problem too was that the original LOTR used real actors for the orcs. made it obvious that they were CGI in the Hobbit films
LizardEnterprises
I enjoyed the first one. 2 and 3 were poorly paced and hollow, but there was a good movie in there if you edit out like, half of it.
SuprisedPikachuFace
Personally I reckon the lake town story line and the Tauriel love story line were the only things that felt out of place, or too drawn out.
LizardEnterprises
Or how bout our PoV character spending the entire 3rd act of the 3rd movie unconscious?
LizardEnterprises
And for that matter, why is the thing that Bilbo does to earn the Dwarves' trust a football tackle and not, ya know, theiving?
LizardEnterprises
For that matter why is the football tackle scene set to the fucking ringwraith theme?! You cant just recycle leitmotifs! Music means things!
LizardEnterprises
They spend all of 2 building up Smaug, and then he's dead before the title card of 3. Tell me that wasn't just a bit weird?
Toiletpro4
Hell yeah. People give them shit but they’re light years ahead of what star wars fans got.
AssistantToTheRegionalManagerDwightSchrute
That’s a pretty low bar haha
Dustfinger4268
There are better porn parodys than what we got
happenedtomeonce
CulturallyEmbiggened
As a Star Wars fan, that's fair.
Ohio
Hmm. I don't disagree with your sentiment but I want to point out the hobbit is a classic book beloved by generations. I know there were
Ohio
Plenty of EU books to pick from, but none of them comparable to the hobbit. They could have done better than these SW movies with an eu
Ohio
Story probably. But with the people they put behind the movies it probably still wouldn't have been better than the hobbit films haha.
Oldmemedigger
To be fair... That's not a hard thing to achieve.
toastysteve
You were wrong to.
Kr1osLegion
So were you when you decided to use the wrong "too."
Botticelliii
Lol when you go to correct someone and end up swallowing your fucking foot.
RtsWillH1Mself
I think they were trying to say "you were wrong to like them"
DrLoganHowlett
Sillysausages
I think they used the correct 'to.'. They didn't mean 'as well'
LordBrandonTheBold
It's not love my dear, It's a cash grab. That's why you feel so hollow and poorly constructed.
unvalidusername
Still a better love story than Twillight...
BluePineapple64
Probably true, but we’re awfully close.
raknor88
I must be one of the few that likes the Hobbit trilogy.
mkelter
I liked it too
lookingOknaked
I liked it in concept, hate the execution.
joeyjojosharknado
It felt too stretched and thin, like butter scraped over too much bread.
Lokimund
Chikkintiddy
sirwaffle
It's a 300 page children's book barfed into three movies it was a money grab from the beginning
Beardedgeek72
The Hobbit Trilogy: removing anything resembling the book while stretching it to three movies.
JustAnotherCynicToo
A trilogy, full of filler to make a three-hundred page book equal three feature-length movies long.
greyrey
The problem is that it's a trilogy. One movie would have been enough.
AeonQuasars
I think 2 would have been enough. Skipped all the nonsense, but still keep a slow pace. 1 movie alone would have been a rush.
Kats8652
The first movie was almost perfect in pacing, skip most of the "build up to LOTR" with Gandalf and the nine/necromancer...
Kats8652
And the last half hour of desolation and keep the battle of the five army's to 1 respectable length and 2 movies would be perfect.
TheAncientSea
You must be
Freeflare
It's a trilogy that cuts huge swaths of the source out and replaces it with filler and inanity. They are not good films.
fantasticlight
Check out the Tolkien Edit.
12Centuries
A torrentable version which has all of the added crap removed.
12Centuries
Now if we could just get Topher Grace's Sta Wars Episode 1-3 remake.
ScootinNtootin
We all liked it, it just didn't need extra stuff added to the story. It was superficial and cheapened 3 well made movies.
Anarric
#agreed; I felt the fact Gandalf coming face to face with Sauron cheapened the Fellowship "I have questions that need answers" like bro 1/2
Anarric
2/2 You know who's ring that is!
Azukare
I just felt they should have stuck with only doing 2 movies. There were so much filler. Some Good, some utterly unnecessary
losboccacc
they wanted to make an epic out of a children book, it's not the length, it's the tone that gives dissonance.
Azukare
Yes. But is starter with just 2 films. when they filmef the second they got green light for a third. the drawn out Smaug/dwarfs battle
DonaldFuck
I didn't like it. Anything of it. I saw that trilogy once, but the LotR trilogy many times.
WaveMotionGum
The dwarves showing up at bag end was solid gold...everything was down hill from there.
Onsvaltti
Yeah, characters were pretty cool and stuff, but I rolled my eyes for the romance. We only needed bromance. Sadly hobbiy isn't on my netflix
iamwang
Well speak for yourself mr
JimFromMarketing
You make me sick
Botticelliii
"How dare you not like the same thing as me!!! REEEEEAAAAAA!!!" - what you fucking sound like.
JimFromMarketing
Well, I was kidding
Edgekrsher
This makes me glad I didn’t watch the hobbit movies
InWedgeWeTrust
I think the extended versions helped the trilogy.
ZombieVarwick
I watched the first, didn't care for it. Saw most of the second and refuse to see the third.
mardukkur
Same.
GCRust
Same. I noped out of the whole endeavor when I heard Jackson was making one book three films.
ScootinNtootin
Depends on how much you love LoTR. They're good movies if you can cringe through the filler BS.
Ikwilstroopwaffels
I love them a lot. Not perfect by any means, but fun.
SomeCrazyNerd
The battle scenes are alright? And Lee Pace is good as Thranduil
SuprisedPikachuFace
Yea he was, and casting overall was good I felt. Battle scenes were decent but pales in comparison to lotr for me.
Silas007
Watch this masterpiece instead: https://youtu.be/uTRUQ-RKfUs
attila3000
Go and watch it, share the load with us.
Unbarring
The extended editions make it alot more better
SuprisedPikachuFace
I agree, watching the trilogy a 3rd time rn but 1st time watching the extended version & it makes way more sense now & links to lotr better.
Zaayl
Isnt that the opposite of what people want?
DungeonMaster69
You should, the third one has a fun 5 minute scene that just shows almost every character one by one just staring
Kodaxmax
i see they are taking queues from shitty anime
fattpuss
I was going to make a comment specifically about Attack on Titan. God I hate that show.
Kodaxmax
I love the concept, art and mystery, but man is the cinematography and direction (or whatever the animation equivalent is) awful.
fattpuss
Yep. Feel exactly the same. episode can be broke down in to 5 minutes of plot. 5 min close up of shaking eyes. Ads. Recap first 5 minutes.
ClassyReposts
My friend told me you can get the unofficial "Tolkien Edit" from questionable sources. A 4 hour cut of all 3 movies, which cut out this
S4GL0RD
I tried, but most fan edits have no sense for pacing or tone.
ClassyReposts
I never watched the original, but Tolkien edit did "feel" like an original to watch
DranksAndDragons
Wasn’t it like Topher Grace who made it?
Binsto
i think thats the SW prequel cut
ClassyReposts
weird romance. I quite liked it.
ClassyReposts
I mean my friend did. My friend quite liked it.
MyNameIsntChris
My friend would like to purchase or perhaps download such an edit. Are the keywords "Tolkien edit"?
Evilgerman3000
.
ClassyReposts
Yes, "Tolkien edit". I think you'll also find a couple blog posts about it if you Google it.
BishlamekGurpgork
I am also interested in locating this.
ClassyReposts
I answered the other guy, basically "Tolkien edit" are the keywords to search for.
thepatioheater
The reason behind the whole 3 movies thing is an interesting story about how shit the movie industry is. It was only supposed to be 2!
BrayerIncognito
Indeed, MGM pushed Jackson to add a "3rd" after shooting most of the 2 he had planned. I'd actually like to see if...
BrayerIncognito
...he could do his original cut/idea and remove the fluff.
theyar
It's a short story. It's barely one movie.
thepatioheater
I watched Lindsay Ellis' videos about it. Worth it if you've got 1.5hrs to spare! https://youtu.be/uTRUQ-RKfUs
sundaymondayhippyday
thank you... sauce...
SecondWind90
Lindsay Ellis, gonna pass on that one
Wellshiet
Oh boy here we go, incel rage
EdiciusMaximus
Why what's wrong with her?
SecondWind90
https://www.deviantart.com/xennerdreborn/art/Lindsay-Ellis-and-Anita-Sarkeesian-are-Brainwashed-796991450
herzatz
ok incel