IAmTheDarkMermaid
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It never fails. Whether its the foundation people, plumbing, or any sort of service they call him. Each time I have to correct them and say "I'm the homeowner."
I put both our numbers down as a call reference just so I wouldn't miss their calls.
Plumber dude was like "Huuhh. I'd think you moved into his house." -__-
I'll give them my name and his name; they will either ignore my last name and go by his or omit me completely and just straight up call it his house.
Usually when we finally meet in person I get it corrected.
But correcting them and seeing their surprise puts a smile on my face.
DooDooDaddy
I had a roofer who did this. He talked down to my wife and was all “yes sir. No sir.” With me. He got fired. My only regret is not sooner.
MyLittleLily
I know a dude who has sole custody and even though he told the school numerous times, they always called the mother first about the kids.
CatsOrExcited
Yikes, that needs to be addressed. In a bad situation that could be dangerous.
Taxicat
Casual Sexism 101. Most people don’t even realize they’re doing it until someone points it out to them.
4Running4life
So true. Working in a male dominated field i notice it all the time, now that i have a higher position i call it out to kindly educate them.
itrhymeswithshells
Me (50 something female) and my nephew (20yo male) were in front of my house washing our cars. Realtor came by and spoke to him about my 1/2
itrhymeswithshells
2/2 house. He thought he was the owner. He LOOKS 12.
yallmfsneedjesus
Same thing happens with schools and daycares but reversed. The ONLY ever mom. Its like, you can bother dad at work too ya know!
Snoopy101x
If you have other options don't give them your business. If they are not going to respect you upfront then they are not going to respect /1
Snoopy101x
you with the quality of work they do. And will think they can pull a fast one on you just because "you're a girl."
HailHector
Pee on the service techs to assert your dominance.
scottsinflavortown
You are the Dark Mermaid damnit! Show them who the boss is
Heavenissize17socks
KnightThatDrinksTea
Yes, she should drown him, put him in a bathtube full of water and eat his remains when it starts to get all wobbly and easy to devour.
W0b0
And steal his voice n give him legs
IAmTheFarmer
Welcome to the shit show. No one believes it is my farm. They assume my bf or dad.
NinjaHoff
Username checks out
Zmokahontas
:D you gotta farm?! Do you have bunnies?
IAmTheFarmer
No bunnies yet but that's the kids first request when we love to s bigger farm
kirbyvictorious
DO U HAVE CHICKENS I LOVE CHICKENS
IAmTheFarmer
Well April through October I raise ~2000
kirbyvictorious
SO MANY CHICKIES
WhosCatIsItAnyway
Read your story. Pretty damn cool what you've accomplished, even though you lost the barn
IAmTheFarmer
Hey thanks!! This year has gone so great I'm doubling everything! And five times the ducks :D
Asbjorn
Ah, kind words are a barn for a broken heart.
SazzMcGee
Man, I hate the sexism here. But in case it makes you feel better, I've been asked if my parents were home when dealing with house stuff.
MrGoodCat5
Omg same. I had a whole conversation with a neighbor once. He asked me how many kids were in the home. When I said none yet he finally
MrGoodCat5
Realized I was the homeowner. We were both embarrassed and I just finished my walk.
ineedscoffee
Workmen doing estimates always say, “dontcha wanna discuss it with hubby?” I tell ‘em I bought the house without discussing it.
canyouthriveat35
I’m single so it’s “there isn’t a husband to ask and I wouldn’t if there was.”
AlwaysUpVoteGSD
My only hesitation with that is that I don't like announcing that I'm a single female, living alone. Even though I have a German Shepherd.
canyouthriveat35
It was a small town with a low crime rate so I wasn’t too worried. I’ve since moved and have guns and knives strategically placed at home.
holdonwhileioverthinkthis
I had a roof guy come out 4 quote. Requested to speak to fiance- I clarified I was the sole homeowner and he still didnt want to talk to me.
holdonwhileioverthinkthis
Had no issues with any other company. This guy was just such a misogynist prick.
IdiopathicHomosapien
I bought a house as a single woman and I always get an invisible spouse assigned to me. "You guys", "you two". Or, "are you authorized 1/
IdiopathicHomosapien
To make changes to the account?" I bloody well hope so, it's my house, the account is in my name, and no one else lives here. 2/2
BrilliantButCowardly
My husband and I both own our house and are both listed as primaries on all our bills. People still only want to talk to him...
HighlandPotatoe
My utities wouldn't talk to me because it was in my husband's name. Despite us both being on the contract and them having never spoken tohim
nosaucesbutapplesauces
My husband’s ONE job was to turn on utilities. He literally put them all in my name so he wouldn’t have to deal with it ever again.
BrilliantButCowardly
Especially if I start asking detailed questions about bills and services. It’s always, “is your husband there, ma’am?”
MamaRosie
I'd just fucking reply with, "I ate him, is someone smarter there?"
IAmTheDarkMermaid
AmotsEinhorc
Does your boyfriend have an account so I can upvote this post.
TestyZesticles
Kill him. Problem solved and you made a statement.
PraiseTheMachineGod
So, you're saying she's gonna be singe?
kirbyvictorious
I like you
TarrkertheNewt
Ah yes. The casual suggestion of murder. There's always one. I have no idea why this is considered socially acceptable.
vahnn
How come this gets 240 upvotes but anytime I advise someone to commit murder on Imgur my post gets deleted and I get banned for days on end?
AsparagusSyndrome
StarscreamAndHutch
Maintain eye contact, establish dominance. Wipe blood off pencil onto their own clothes.
marlinhr3
Start a movement
FlyingDorito
plumber? no.. I need him.
TotallyNotAMurderer
Agreed
MagmaCarta
Total power move
slightlyincorrectquotes
I see this as an absolute win
StalkerMagnetxx
wait... the repairmen or the boyfriend?
besn
Yes.
IAmTheDarkMermaid
Aldorin
So you’re single AND a homeowner? I’ll be your stay-at-home whatever you want me to be. My wife might be pissed though...
Syk0tik0ne
Everyone needs to learn how to share eventually.
DontTazeMeBrah
Eat him and you'll never be alone
v
NonstopRampage
I like the way you think.
mkreku
When I go with my female friends to buy tech the salesperson ALWAYS faces me when talking, even though she is buying the tech
canyouthriveat35
My brother went with me to buy a car. They only wanted to talk to him. Thankfully he told them it was me they we’re dealing with not him.
clide005
I ask my wife to hire a guy to do the repair. Bc you know talking to people sux. Guy refuses to do the repair without getting my permission.
MrSquiggleTheManFromMars
Is house under only your name? Or anything like that? Idk if a solar company would egen have that info tho
DickMundee
Congrats on the new house
PoodyCZ
And on the sex
IAmTheDarkMermaid
I've actually had it 1 1/2 years! House started settling and got it lifted. Funny enough I paid for it in full.
snowglobeshaker
Congrats on the house! I’ve had the same problem - any random man in my house automatically assumed to be the owner. Even a plumber once!
Audasity
nice!
CalvinMcFly
Holy cow, how much was that??
IAmTheDarkMermaid
7k. Butcthe plumbing is like 10k
DickMundee
hope everything works out ok
IAmTheDarkMermaid
I hope so too. This plumbing thing I won't be able to pay in full. Just waiting for insurance to approve this and they're taking foreverrr.
AgnesMcGillicuddy
Contractor came to bid on our bathroom and never addressed me, even though we told him I was the decision maker. He didn't get the contract.
crswjr
Same shit happens everywhere - people just naturally assumes "The man of the house" runs the house and its affairs.
Nuggettt
Oof i had this happen, but it was with my car. I green lit a repair, and the other person who picked me up halted the repair. I was the only
Nuggettt
Person on my cars contact info. I just picked my car up immediately after that. They kept waiting to run a diag and never did anything for
Nuggettt
Weeks, and left my car unlocked for weeks. They were nice though, but for security reasons im not going back there.
IAmTheDarkMermaid
It be do. I usually correct them and it helps.
Heninthefoxden
happens to me and husband too. Got three quotes for bath remodel, picked the dude that didn't talk down to me as I told him what I wanted.
SamanosukeOnimusha
Good job staying on it. It's easier to not say anything but then they never learn
TheVermonster
My wife went to buy a car. She would ask a question and the salesman would turn to answer me. I finally said "look at her when you respond"
noisegirl
This actually happened to me at University with a professor. I would ask a question and he would turn to my field partner to answer.
daslar
I actually have the opposite happen to me. When I called places for a new roof they wouldn’t speak to me without my wife.
TJMack
That’s a sales tactic. They want to worry her in front of you.
daslar
They didn’t do that at all. It was more financial reasons wanting her ok on the price.
TJMack
Fair... Do you not upvote your own comments? I’m I a jerk for always upvoting mine?
daslar
I think I do haha. They are both green for me. No way that is a jerk move or else we both are.
NarutoSexyJutsu
When my husband and I first moved in, we had a solar company pay us a visit. I told them no, but the wanted to speak to the man of the house
IAmTheDarkMermaid
I would of told them I'm the man of the house, don't come to my house ever again.
NarutoSexyJutsu
My husband was playing video games, overheard and told him to not be a sexist prick and that he couldn’t solicit in the neighborhood
Arrowheadx1
When I was on my own contracting I'd run into people like you all the time. It's your house, not his. Don't put his contact info down.
FloatingOnACloudOfTitties
I've been through this my whole life. I bought my first car & they refer to my boyfriend even though I know more about cars. Same w/ my home
OvergrownDwarf
Good afternoon. I can't..erm..i mean..so..erm..your username..
OnlyPositiveFavourites
I consulted a few surgeons for a breast reduction. Brought my boyfriend along for moral support. One asswad of a surgeon talked to my BF ¹
OnlyPositiveFavourites
Most of the time, ensured him they'd still look good and that kinda creepy stuff. (Didn't go with that surgeon of course)
LateNightBunnyParty
Good god.
4Running4life
The worst. Owned my own house, single, and companies would be like “is there a man of the house” wtf it’s 2016+!!
SirChadwellHeath
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wgDgntY1LCQ
kaidell
Girl, same. I’m a single female homeowner and contractors sometimes straight up disconnect me because they think they’re getting pranked
OvergrownDwarf
Can i just say...that is some good comedic material if u work on ur delivery timing lol!
IAmTheDarkMermaid
ChetTheRocketStedman
If it helps. My wife owns this house. And when we hire people for work they call me “Mr. [Her Last Name]” because most things r in her name
aSansHasNoSerif
This happens to my husband. It's always, Mr (my last name) bc I handle a lot of the affairs and kept my last name
IAmTheFarmer
They only call you that because they think she took your name. It's kind of worse
bluemagister
Most married couples share the same last name. If they only have the name for the work / deed / whatever, it's a safe assumption.
whatevertakemyupvote
It is not a safe assumption anymore.q
bluemagister
It absolutely still is, by the numbers. Percentages of married couples who share the same name is about 80%.
CuttleFishOfCthulu
Just roll with it. You're more likely to get ripped off than he is. My wife always gets quoted higher for things than if I do it. Sucks
TJMack
This is very subjective. I don’t bid based on sex I bid on potential pain in the ass.
GiNgErSnApBiTcH
as a woman ... exactly this
RoscoeDeBoscoe
Just went through this. They don't listen when it's a woman telling them the problem, either. Cost me an extra 50 because they didn't listen
duhqueenmoki
As a woman who owns everything in the relationship, this is SO true!! I still gove ppl my bf's number because they give him a fairer price.
Sutashi
Yep. I always have my dad deal w them because he gets better deals.
khety1890
What about lesbians? They should just be honest to everyone. That isn't hard. Not being sexist isn't hard.
OvergrownDwarf
Ha..classic but true..one of life little gotchas that u cnt easily change.
sisuandserenity
I play the waiting game. Got my roof completely redone for $9K when their original quote was $23K. Just had to “think about it” long enough.
schmendrickthemagician
Well that, in and of I itself, is shit, not okay, and shouldn’t just be “rolled with.”
qtRaven
Happens to guys too. I had a mechanic shop quote me hundreds for something I didn't ask for. Tried the "legally we have to do this" bit.
TJMack
Downvoting this is whack. It absolutely goes both ways.
Himser
As a legal and policy nerd i LOVE it when they say legally they have to do something. Thats my favriot argument ever. They NEVER know.
imcurrentlyatabar
Fun thing to do: I always ask them to give me the list of things they want to do in writing, with notations on what is “legally required”...
qtRaven
They told me they "Legally" had to do a full brake replacement. I told them to give me the keys or I'd come back there and take them.
becauseurwrong
I've had them say "legally we can't let you leave unless we change your steering fluid." I called my mom. Mechanics regretted being born.
qtRaven
Same sort of thing they told me. Full brake repair. I told them to give me the keys or I'd come back there and take them. Never went back.
becauseurwrong
Lil disclaimer: i got there fine, the trip was for oil change only, & they showed me color of perfectly fine steering fluid.
physicsisalwaysrelevant
Legally, I do not authorize this repair. Unless I am allowed to leave with it after paying for the authorized repairs, I will report it >
physicsisalwaysrelevant
Stolen.
KoalaPommy
No, how about tradespeople not be arseholes and do the work fair and without gender prejudice
CuttleFishOfCthulu
Tell one that yourself.
ijustfreakinglovecheese
Yes, that would be great
EveryoneWhoDisagreesWithMeIsLiterallyHitler
lmao okay, good luck w getting flexibly priced services permanently fixed
EveryoneWhoDisagreesWithMeIsLiterallyHitler
not that i disagree, im just saying youre not gonna cure the price thing.
RedbuIIVodka
Never going to happen. They all reside at our local bar and I'm qualified to say this with absolute sincerity : Don't bother.
Hyero
Sure, but if you play both sides you come out on top.
cbmech7
I hear you, but yeah, good luck with that. That's like asking Trump supporter to care about illegal immigrants.
TJMack
I’ve seen the opposite more often than not. Depends on the trade, I suppose. I’m sure it’s both ways but that’s a harsh comparison.
iamthugnasty
Tbh its not even unfair or prejudice a lot of times. Often when working for women the work takes longer or gets changed which costs more
iamthugnasty
I've been working service jobs for over a decade and its almost always the women who want everything explained in detail and check on me
Zuzab
So they want you to do the job they paid you for? Twat
iamthugnasty
Its not that, its that they feel the need to monitor and interupt which makes it take longer and cost more
Angel2Rock
They could be checking on you because your a stranger in their house? And they could want more detail on what your doing because they
Angel2Rock
Want to understand what’s wrong and why/how to fix for future? Or because they want know what your doing exactly so they have less chance of
dantethetemplar
When starting work with a company specify that you are the homeowner, and that your bf is only listed for when you aren't available. 1/
AgnesMcGillicuddy
If itbis goingnto be an issue that WILL NOT MATTER AT ALL. Same thing buying a car.
snowglobeshaker
Bought house 3+years ago, new b/f over recently. Contractor I bought it from comes to fix wall, IGNORES me and explains to him, a stranger
dantethetemplar
Lol fuck that contractor.
CabNumber1729
Naaa this is a natural selection of industry issue. Leave a review, and -2 stars on it if they do this, explain in the review.
VaultGirl69
That generation isn't used to women being financial providers. I have my own man potato and I love him.
kirbyvictorious
It’s not the ease of fixing the problem that is the problem you see....
somethingintangible
And there is why you never see any progress. Too hell bent on "killing the patriarch" and not enough focus on pragmatism. Idiot
Atharaenea
She shouldn't have to do that. They should stop assuming the male name is the homeowner. She's listed first, assume it's her house.
dantethetemplar
You're right, but there is a shit ton of fuckin idiots out there.
dantethetemplar
Also be sure to say it more than once, and that all decisions must go through you.
Ydafuqitmattertho
It also helps to present said bfs balls in either a case or bag to strengthen your stance.
Greyeyes1973
^this. "Last time they asked him, he turned our bedroom into the Millennium Falcon!"
Yusill
No you say that shit once. If they don't get approval that's thier fault if your the only one listed.
IAmTheDarkMermaid
Yeah once I correct them they change it. My foundation dude even deleted his name and put my name for both numbers. But if I need 1/2
IAmTheDarkMermaid
Anything else I'm doing that next time for sure. 2/2
arcenlapin
I'd honestly give both #s as your own, and just give BF heads up he may receive calls for you so he's not confused.
IcommentMostlyWithGifs
Much more productive than an imgur post.
Jutana
Like this makes sense... But if she's the one requesting work, it should be a non-issue to begin with and they should work through her.
dantethetemplar
Of course, but let's not forget how many people are out there with little to no common sense, or customer service skills.
IwishIwasfunnieronline
Right. No woman should have to specify it's HER house.
enyoincarnate
Honestly, I default to not hiring that person (if they make the mistake after being corrected). I can shop around for non-sexists.
travishawkins2199
My wife has done a ton of projects for our house and she's never had this problem, when they finally see me they look at me like I broke in
enyoincarnate
That’s awesome! I wonder if it has to do with where you live? Or I guess where I live on the flip of that.
travishawkins2199
Could be, this happened in New Mexico
FlatPlutoSociety
Yeah. Automatically assuming the guy is in charge is bad enough, but if the woman's name is on the work order, holy shit.
enyoincarnate
This happened to me when I bought my old house. My ex was unemployed and I was the only one they ever spoke to yet his name went first.
FlatPlutoSociety
Not surprised. I've accompanied my girlfriend to the auto shop, and even though the work order says "Erika," they always talk to me first.
Jutana
It happens with my car when I get it serviced, everyone wants to hand the keys to my SO and I'm like 'nope, thanks'
enyoincarnate
It’s a bit frustrating. I can 100% say that I know more about the project/car/etc than my ex but even if I didn’t, I am the customer...
somethingintangible
Pretty much this is how easily fixed OPs non-problem is.
Taxicat
You really don’t see a problem with them making those assumptions in the first place?
bluemagister
Not at all. From the service side, they get trained to default to that from enough women saying "talk to my husband about this stuff".
Taxicat
So it’s HER fault that they made an incorrect assumption when they could’ve just checked the damn paperwork?
bluemagister
What? I'm saying even if the woman made the call / is on the forms, wives tell the guy "talk to my husband about it" w/ enough frequency.
BerticusFlamebearer
The problem is expecting change off of no information. If it's important, say it's important early and often otherwise they won't know.
Taxicat
What “change-off of information”? She’s the homeowner. It’s her name on all the paperwork. Why assume her boyfriend is the homeowner?
somethingintangible
Because it happens with enough frequency to become the default behaviour.
StarkRG
When would it not be important to discuss home repairs with the actual homeowner? I think we can just assume that's always important.
BerticusFlamebearer
I'd assume saying you can contact another person would mean you can contact the other person. Otherwise what was the point in listing them.
noisegirl
Exactly, they’ll be phoning her quick enough when it comes time to pay and he tells them it’s not his house. You’d think finding out 1/2
kirbyvictorious
Do you not see how she shouldn’t have to put up with this shit
somethingintangible
Put up with what? There's no problem here.
kirbyvictorious
Go back to the fifties Richard Nixon
somethingintangible
Get real you infant. My gf owns our place. She doesn't give a shit who thinks who owns it cause she's an adult. She puts only her name down
Kronzor
What is she putting up with? A minor misunderstanding that is corrected easily?
AgnesMcGillicuddy
Now I'm getting all steamed up.
kirbyvictorious
Sis same
dragonassbabe
hmm look who obviously does not have a problem with sexism.
kirbyvictorious
BASED PURELY ON GENDER YES
somethingintangible
But it's also based on real world data. If all these tradies are only ever interacting with the man because women don't want to deal with it
noisegirl
It seems minor when it’s once. But when it happens repeatedly, it becomes frustrating that you constantly have to correct people. Plus 1/2
noisegirl
Think how much longer everything in life takes if everyone goes through another person, before actually talking to you.
Feralkyn
It may be hard to understand, but imagine if your daily life is a string of such assumptions based on your gender alone. It gets really-
Feralkyn
frustrating; it's demeaning, shaming, and people who think it's normal or okay to go straight to "the man of the house" do need to catch up