Friday morning dump

Jun 9, 2017 12:47 PM

jcravenw

Views

150579

Likes

5355

Dislikes

272

And then there was one......

Searching for the right spud

True.

To be fair, I was thinking that though.....

Taking it to the next level

Lord knows I would smash

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began...

8 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 1

I'm pretty much fucked. And the the murders began. -The Martian

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

OMG, "Fondil Mabols"...dying

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Like the monk aint a freak, he got a belt of anal beads

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

You're not wrong, pal.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#1 *holds wine glass with perpendicular pinky finger*

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I texted strangers trying to trick them into finishing my owl joke. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

Hahaha

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As a tenor player, I can confirm that #6 is 100% accurate.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Christina hendricks... What a goddess...

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Mr and Mrs Dursley were happy to say they were perfectly normal people, thank you very much. Then, the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

Exactly what I was thinking about!

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Dank.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

ABC Motherfucker is my summer jam!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

123 MOTHERFUCKER!!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A little more than one hundred days into the fortieth year of her confinement, Dajeil Gelian was visited in her lonely tower /2

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

overlooking the sea by an avatar of the great ship that was her home. Then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

+1 for the Culture. And then the murders began *is* rather Banks-y, even.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Who dis?

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

+1

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah it was brutal

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#26 - Stalemate?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The white piece is a queen

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Whoops. My bad. Thought it was the king.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A Lot of people did. No worries :D

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#3 If only Lego made little people-shaped figures.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

yeh but its the brick that will mess you up

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Which is the weaponry of the Lego Minifigures.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

skyrim belongs to the bricks!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I had just stepped up my game using the ribbed stranger, and then the murders began...

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That is a long post. Thats what she said. And then the murders began

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I can imagine his voice as a kid. Kinda the same but with a pitched voice.

8 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 1

I'm pretty sure I remember something where he inhaled helium. Was it a science show or some shit?

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yeah, he were on the "Tonight show" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FRKVQcbIByo

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#26 stalemate?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

White could be taking an offensive move toward black-king, since that space is protected by knight. Would be CM.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Actually, that white piece is a queen, not a king.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#26 thats a stalemate, not a checkmate

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 9

This is important.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Assuming those are the only pieces left on the board it is a checkmate, isn't it? Or can you choose to not move?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I believe if that happens and the king is the only piece left then its a draw rather than a checkmate.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

How would it be a draw? if the black king moves he dies no matter what if he passes (is that allowed?) then the person with more pieces wins

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's a stalemate, he has no valid move that won't put him in checkmate but isn't already in checkmate, so neither player wins.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You are correct.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Is that not a Queen?

8 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Oh. Thought it was a king. My bad :/

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

It happens every time that image is posted.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's okay. That happens in bars, too.

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

I didn't know there was a difference. What is it?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

(1/2) A checkmate is when the king is being attacked and cant move to another spot where he isnt being attacked, and a stalemate is when

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

(2/2) the king is safe where it is and it cant move to any other position

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Doesn't it also become a draw if there is no possible move other than putting the king in a spot where it can be taken?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Thanks!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. →

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Not for the first time, an argument had broken out over breakfast at number four, Privet Drive. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Harry Potter was a highly unusual boy in many ways. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The villagers of Little Hangleton still called it “the Riddle House,” even though it had been many years since the Riddle family had lived →

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

there. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Clearly you eat plenty of fiber because that was a solid dump +1

8 years ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 2

And then the murders began

8 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 0

Actually protein makes your shit hard. (solid) Fiber does the opposite, which is why it makes you shit.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

COME ON!! It's NOT checkmate, it's a DRAW

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 4

Like me, you thought the white piece was another king. The picture is not very clear.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hahaha yeah I know :) I always get butthurt about chess

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I find it interesting the amount of people who assume the joke is a mistake, I wish I could get the data on the people who see it one way 1/

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

vs the other and see what sort of correlation exists, like do the people who assume it's another king play more or less chess than those 2/

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

that assume the other way? Or is it a linguistic difference? Also, INB4 someone says something about assuming the chess piece's gender. 3/3

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

No it's not. The white queen moving there is Check. And the three adjacent squares are unavailable.

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

They basically look the same... Either both are queens or BOTH kings

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I respectfully disagree.

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

I need this every time this image gets posted, thank you!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I regrettably retract my statement

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I got some of them metal chairs in the backyard, too. Hold up brb

8 years ago | Likes 291 Dislikes 4

...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 117 Dislikes 2

dot

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Isn't 11 hours enough?

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

For science

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Well?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I thought that said the ribbed strangler

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Also good

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Thanks for taking one for the team ship shipp shipps

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Mysterious magnetic ball carries away another victim, and then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 148 Dislikes 1

This guy gets it.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Is his hair made of metal?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ok, what did I miss.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

In the beginning, God created the Earth.

8 years ago | Likes 63 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 1

kinda accurate really

8 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

just delayed a couple years

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

but only during the flood

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Halo has nothing to do with this

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Then there is that first born problem.... gotta pay the man when he comes calling.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 489 Dislikes 7

"I AM NOT A CROOK!" And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

And then after the murders began it was the BLURST of times?! You stupid monkey!

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Damb

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Interestingly, that could be interpreted as the murders have made the times somewhat better than before when they were the worst.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Who dis?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The unicorn lived in a lilac wood, and she lived all alone. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Marley was dead, to begin with. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Well I'll be a mother fucker. Shit does work.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No body, no crime.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth...and then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. And then the murders began

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The man in black fled across the desert and the gunslinger followed. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

In the light of the moon, a little egg lay on a leaf. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"I've watched through his eyes, listened through his ears, I'm telling you he's the one." And then the murders began. Not far off, honestly

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

mine would be "I've been training for weeks. And then the murders began." so it's not always accurate.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Call me Ishmael. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Springtime for Hitler and Germany. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Once upon a time, there were three little pigs. And that's when the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Who dis? And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Dotting this thread because it's amazing.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

In the beginning, the universe was created. Then the murders began. This made a lot of people unhappy and is widely regarded as a bad move.

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

"Where's Papa going with that axe?" said Fern to her mother as they were setting the table for breakfast." And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

He is a violent bastard, he killed almost everybody.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began, again.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

It was the best of times... it was the BLURST of times?! And then the murders began

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Who is John Galt? And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

That's where my mind went too.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

"Where’s Papa going with that axe?” And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

No, dude: "It was the best of times. And then the murders began. It was the worse of times." See? So much better!

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

Twas the night before Christmas, and then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Awe, the story of Jonbenet Ramsey

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

The sun did not shine, it was too wet to play, so we sat in the house all that cold, cold wet day. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

In the beginning, the universe was created. Then the murders began. This made a lot of people unhappy and is widely regarded as a bad move.

8 years ago | Likes 74 Dislikes 3

In the beginning, the universe was created. This made a lot of people unhappy and is widely regarded as a bad move. Then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 27 Dislikes 2

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. AND THEN THE MURDERS BEGAN.

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

Call me Ishmael. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 2

Damn this was the first sentence to pop in my head too! I've never even read the book. I liked the movie matilda though

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man possessed of a good fortune must be in want of a wife. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

The tropical rain fell in drenching sheets, hammering the corrugated roof of the clinic building, roaring down the metal gutters, 1/2

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

splashing on the ground in a torrent. And then the murders began. 2/2 Who recognises it?

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Hit me up with that Jurassic Park

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Nice. I wasn't expecting anyone to know it since it's not giving any big hints.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I've read that book 8 times in the last year and I only read 5 books a year

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth, upon this continent, a new nation, conceived in liberty, and dedicated (1/2)

8 years ago | Likes 148 Dislikes 3

to the proposition that all men are created equal. And then the murders began. (2/2)

8 years ago | Likes 136 Dislikes 0

began?

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Perfect. Just perfect.

8 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

10/10

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. 1/2

8 years ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 0

I almost did this one, glad someone else did

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 49 Dislikes 0

I would read the shit out of that.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That is a strangely accurate amendment.

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Sounds like the beginning of a crime thriller where the serial killers are disguised as a normal family or something

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first Birthday with a party

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

of special magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton. Then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Shouldn't that be "It was the best of times. And then the murders began. It was the worst of times."

8 years ago | Likes 54 Dislikes 2

The sentence is about ninety words long. We abbreviate it to the popular version because that WOULD have been a great opening sentence

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

if Dickens knew what a period was.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When he was nearly thirteen my brother Jem got his arm badly broken at the elbow. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 0

That's actually exactly right, although they were only attempted.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well, he did wind up dead by the end of the book. Shot when he tried escaping from prison.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. And then the murders began.

8 years ago | Likes 64 Dislikes 1

I mean...it's not far off the truth...

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

There was Eru, the One, who in Arda is called Ilúvatar; and he made first the Ainur, the Holy Ones, that were the offspring of his thought,

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

and they were with him before aught else was made. And then the murders began. 2/2

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

When Mr. Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special 1/2

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

magnificence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton. And then the murders began. 2/2

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0