WarKittyKat
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She had one mass removed from her breast tissue and a bunch of smaller masses nearby. The vet recommended chemo, but it's hundreds of dollars at a bad time for me, and all they could tell me was that some studies suggest dogs live longer when given chemo. I'm pretty sure intellectually it's the right decision, but I still feel like I'm betraying her.
She's a good kitty who's had a hard life. I try to spoil her the best I can - she's a better family than my real one, and I'm going to miss her.
Edit: This would be the one post that blows up. She's happy so far, doing her usual begging for pets and brushies and staring at me from whatever perch she can get to. If I thought chemo would get rid of the cancer I'd find a way to pay for it, but right now it's not even certain how long it would give her. It won't cure her.
Thanks for all the support and PM's - I've responded to a few, I'll check back and respond properly to more later.
#confession_bear #cat
iWishThereWasAWayToDeleteThis
WeAdoptTheOldBlackCats
Put her on hospice with the goal to make her comfortable. Love her and do what's right for her comfort. Chemo comes with no guarantees.
metalheadmafia
I love pets. I always treat them like family, but there comes a point where spending thousands of dollars on an animal isn't smart
Muttons1337
My dog was 18 and degrading rapidly. We took her in to put her down and the vet told us "she has a strong heart!" Damn it don't tell me that
theoriginalkittySPARKLES
Totally get this. Have sick boy with intestinal cancer and a major heart condition now for 2 .5 yrs -hardest ride of my life in many ways
MeowMyOvaries
I'm sure if you did kitty chemo all the fur would fall out and she'd be an adorable bald testicat
asquiiiiiiisha
Chemo is nasty and animals don’t understand why they’re suffering. Unless remission is likely I wouldn’t do it.
Jessicageekwhogames
My dog had breast cancer for many years and as far as I know her death was due to something else She died at 16 I pray ur cat lives long
sergeantapone
I refused to pay for an expensive diagnostic test for my dog one time. The vet looked at me like I was a monster. Dog turned out to be ok.
goldensky
I feel so lucky to have a vet who is like "yeeeeah most of these tests are really just preventative, you can pass on X, Y, and Z."
mcneelyj
Good luck OP. I've seen a number of people spend thousands of dollars on these treatments for the cat to struggle and die shortly after.
confettis
Cats don't know chemo is trying to help them, they just feel like crap. What would quality of life be during and after?
confettis
How much time does she gain compared to sick chemo time, and can she ever function normally? Don't be too hard on yourself. It's ok.
DukeBombadil
you are right on both counts, but if she appears to be suffering, pay for her to be put down.
kermotherapy
Home visit by the vet is the best way when the time comes.
SociallyConfidentButterfly
Hey @OP I’ve had to make a very similar difficult decision in regards to cancer treatment for my cat. She will love you no matter what.
aptatlas
Don’t blame you. I don’t get spending thousands of dollars on animal medical bills. Usually you’re prolonging their suffering.
CammieCakes
Agreed. If my dog gets something that would kill him in nature, I'm not paying to stop it. Sorry, I don't have the extra cash.
Sionas
You aren't letting her die, you did what you could. What was her prognosis with chemo?
WarKittyKat
Vague - basically it kind of helps for dogs sometimes, no evidence in cats either way. But it almost certainly wouldn't cure her.
grumpy173
Neighbor spent $10K on chemo for dog w/ cancer. Dog had a miserable miserable couple of months, died two months after the chemo ended.
TheMeofYesterday
Our vet said we could amputate my 10yr bb, but it was in her bones.. i don't know how people can put them through what the pet doesnt 1/2
TheMeofYesterday
understand besides pain and sickness. We got more months of painkillers and treats than chemo and amputation had offered, she was a trooper
ChoochyMcGee
My 16 year old Cat needed chemo. I didn’t do it. I got the cancer excised twice, she lived happily for another 8 months, then never woke up.
ChoochyMcGee
Vet told me that chemo had chance of making her suffer. Never felt pressured into it. I think I made the right choice.You know your kitty op
ChoochyMcGee
Make her the happiest cat ever in her final days
TheMeofYesterday
Make her happy, don't be shy with painkillers, and she'll tell you when its time; didn't think anything would knock my lab down but when 1/2
TheMeofYesterday
her insatiable foodlust was gone and she could only lay and cry... she told us. praying for a long time of your kitty's happiness <3
CuttleFishOfCthulu
If you decide on the chemo, look into Care Credit. You can sign up at the vet. It'll pay for the treatment, and you have a year to pay it >
DianaLnn
@OP LOOK
CuttleFishOfCthulu
< off with no interest. After a year, it goes way up. You can also use it for yourself. Another one is Pet Assure. That'll help a little. >
CuttleFishOfCthulu
< Good luck to both of you. I hope it works out.
RolePlayForFun2
I know it sounds cold but chemo for a pet doesn’t seem like it’s ever a good idea. They can’t understand why they’re miserable so it’s 1/2
RolePlayForFun2
just not worth it. Spoil her for the time she has left and don’t drag it out. Sorry for you, I know how rough losing your furry family is.
carlsagansghost
I think it's unethical for a vet to recommend such an expensive treatment for a pet. It creates a lot of financial and emotional pressure.
TransrectalPalpation
I cannot x-ray your bank acct.
carlsagansghost
Just to maybe prolong the life a little bit. Best vets I ever had were Indian. They recognized death as a normal thing, and never pressured.
carlsagansghost
To extend a pet's life in such a way.
carlsagansghost
I know it's a hard decision, and it really sucks. No getting around that.
L0StWaNdErEr
I spent over 10K keeping a recue alive & didn't save him. It hurt that he died but the years of debt hurt to. No court would convict you
Klove12
Yep. I spent just under 5 grand to save a 13 year old cat that I had for one week. An illness that the rescue could have treated easily.
Klove12
He died anyways. I hate the Edmonton Humane Society now. But I don’t regret it. At all. Will do it again when the time comes.
L0StWaNdErEr
Oh, I'd spend the $$ again in a second, he was an amazing dog although, I've never been accused of being financially responsible
6panelplywooddoor
To be fair, it's how most health systems around the world work. Its shit news, but just treat that lil kitty and cherish the time you have.
SomeDetroitGuy
We made the same choice for my dog. She has lymphoma. Our options were do nothing, and she'd die in about a week. Give her a steroid to give
SomeDetroitGuy
her maybe 1-2 months of life. Or give her chemo to give her maybe 6 months of life. It seemed selfish to make her go through that to give
coffeechocolatepretzels
Same. Did steroids and antibiotics. Realized it was a mask and he was miserable. We made the choice to let him go 3 weeks ago. Why torture?
SomeDetroitGuy
me an extra four months with her. We went with the second option plus a lot of treats. She's definitely gotten worse but we've had a month
SomeDetroitGuy
with her and expect another few weeks.
TheDuuuude
Chemo is brutal enough for people who can rationalize and understand what's happening. It's a lose-lose situation, don't feel guilty.
causality
Also, this kind of thing is almost shot in the dark stuff for vets. The amount of research on pet cancer is very small.
dustwindbun
THIS. Cats don't understand that they're miserable in the hope that it will help. Give her all the love &a peaceful end when the time comes.
ssaberhagen
Chemo in dogs and cats isn't as hard as it is for people, it's meant to make their lives easier not usually as a cure, more as an extension
AbjectFun
THIS!
TmdoeuQ
Chemo in pets is a lot different, we use lower doses and always focus on quality of life. The reward is months-years instead of decades
rach3468
I've been told it's not as hard on animals. As a pediatric oncology nurse I give a lot of chemo. A lot of kids fly through it, some struggle
BlueSkiesChris
1/ Lost my dog to cancer last summer. Chose not to do chemo; thousands of dollars for a treatment that would only buy her a few extra months
BlueSkiesChris
2/ and would make her feel awful the whole time seemed like an obvious non-starter. Instead focused on making the best of our time together.
Fluffyleopard
Cats handle chemo much better than people. Most cats just get an upset stomach.
thisgifisperfect
Seriously?
Zootsoot
We adore our cats. But we agreed no chemo. The animal doesn't understand why the suffering, and the outcome is uncertain
bubblysakura
As someone who's 1 year old is currently going through chemo, yes absolutely. And its hard to watch. But its worth it if you know they 1/2
bubblysakura
A good chance at beating it. When you have so little evidence it sill make much difference like in your situation it is kinder to make 2/3
bubblysakura
Them comfortable and enjoy what they have left :) you arr doing the right thing even though it feels terrible. <3
bubblysakura
Omg the typos are real......sorry guys its very early and im sleep deprived.
peachesforme
Many doctors will refuse chemo for themselves depending on the cancer. at some point people value living better than getting better
Doktorkk
That's just not true in the vast majority of cases
peachesforme
Except it is. Most folks want something to happen so the doctors let them do chemo. But for themselves they know how little it will do. 1/
peachesforme
So they skip it and just try to live their life as they can. It depends on the cancer . They know when it will be worth it 2/
quepadre
Chemo is not brutal for dogs or cats. Our dog was on chemo for 4 months, and she felt 1000% better while we were able to treat her with it.
RNWho
It's not done withh the intention of curing so the therapy is not as intense, you get less side effects.
liala
I'm guessing it depends on the cancer? It will be painful for some humans too.
TmdoeuQ
Way lower doses and focus on quality of life. we are trying to get months to years vs people who can get decades with aggressive treatment
BaldVinnie
This is a very very good outcome. Most dogs do have at least some negative reaction to chemo. Vet nurse, trust me..
quepadre
I guess it all depends on which drug, in what dose etc... but from my understanding the effects are nothing like they are for humans. 1/
quepadre
Our girl had lymphoma and went through three different drugs before her red blood cells dropped too low to continue. 2/2
AverageJoestar
Your choice is rational, but if your kitty appears to be suffering at all, don't drag it out.
HoboTerry
Just shoot it and toss it in a hole.
GuacamoleMoleMolester
My cat went through chemo, it's more affordable here, and died shortly after. She suffered a lot physically and we emotionally.
CrazyMonkeyYT
Gateway drug
anubricwookie
Set your criteria for when to make that call now and stick to it.
BilldeTurlock
1
Isaypoopythingsbecausemostofyouannoyme
Ya, one well aimed swing of a shovel will dig through all nine lives
ThailandExpress
YEah, do for your cat what you can't do for Grandma. Also you can goto jail for letting your cat suffer also so .....
CumDumster
Well said. Stay strong @OP
ImHereToGetDownvotes
This. There's nothing wrong with not spending hundreds to thousands of dollars on a gamble. Your love for her isn't any less if, when 1/?
ImHereToGetDownvotes
she shows symptoms of pain you have her put down and spend the money you saved by saving another cat you will care for from a shelter. 2/2
herefortheboobies
But we can not allow a rational person to make that decision for themselves before everything is taken away. Down vote me all you want.
TrueNorthernLights
I don't think you'll get many downvotes.
TexasChainsawUnicorn
You can in some states.
FancyFrance
We had two knee surgeries on our dog back in the day and she succumbed to bone cancer a few months later. Would not do again, sorry old girl
ohforcrissakes
You did your best, no way you could have known. Sorry about your furry friend.
Shiznit007
You don't have to give up to what looks so easily. Do a GoFundMe page....as well as talk to the vets about payment plans.
Shiznit007
They have ran into the same situation with other people many times I'm sure
LearnSomething
I think this is more about knowing the cat most likely won't make it with the treatment. My dog is currently fighting pneumonia and
LearnSomething
Meningitis and it's costing me thousands to treat but I know she'll probably make a fine recovery. If it had been cancer, I probably would
LearnSomething
Have let her go. There's no reason to make them suffer continually so you can have them around for a few more months.
Shiznit007
If this cat is that important then it's healthy for you to have this cat in your life and you'll do what it takes to hold on to that
Darla626
But is it so important for them to keep the cat that they are going to make it suffer more before the end? This is a selfish human notion
Darla626
Make the kitty as happy and spoiled as possible with the time at hand. Too many people can’t make the hard decision, and their pets suffer
Darla626
A family friend took our dog when we couldn’t house her. With old age she couldn’t walk and would lay in her own mess. It was devastating
Necronox
I wish this applied to people as well... Yet... It pains me greatly to have said that.
DakotaWolf
I agree that if someone is in pain and has no other option but to live it out. don't make them suffer. not sure where the line is though
anubricwookie
This is brutally true. My wife is living in a way she was explicit about not wanting and there is nothing anyone can do, but let her linger.
Necronox
You have my deepest sympathy. I know this feeling all too well.
itisanimgurnaccount
If you're determined to take personal responsibility for your end of life arrangements the law can't stop you. Just be sure about it.
Necronox
It usually isn't for yourself, mate. It is for the someone who has no further means to communicate, always in pain and obviously suffering.
itisanimgurnaccount
Yeah, that situation sucks. Only thing you can do it try and preempt it and/or have a friend you can trust.
WarKittyKat
I'm dreading that decision. She hasn't noticed at all yet.
RespawnAnon
Just shoot it
MakeMeACakeOrGrillMeASteak
Good - still time to love her <3
biggp2
I know the feelings. Your cat appreciates everything you have done, and given her a great life. Father time is undefeated.
Hammsammiches
Just love her, spoil her, and be there with her in the end.
mrread55
The decision is hard at the time but will make a world of sense later on once it’s done. You’ll get solid closure knowing you helped them.
Junktrunkjunkie
Having watched several family members suffer slow deaths and being able to do nothing about it, believe me you are not betraying her.
Lulabel73
I made the same decision with my dog. She was 14 and it was only going to give her another year at most. I didn’t want to put her through it
NinjaLene
Its hard to let go and harder to know when the right time is. Just do what feels right for you and your pet in your situation.
IKnowLessThanJonSnow
I remember the feeling & it sucked to put a dollar limit on the care. Don't go in to a financial bind. Do what you can & cherish the time.
KarlPhylos
Animals don’t show pain as quickly as humans do. They tend to hide it so they don’t appear weak and get culled. Consider ending it earlier.
kirbyvictorious
Stay strong friend. You're doing all you can.
Iloveanonymityandilovebeingnoticed
My cousin put her dog down early so her&kids could remember him healthy(ish) instead of all sick and suffering.
mottolotto
..and spend .35". Its not because its bad for the animal but because they have such short lives. Dont make any of it painful is the motto.
controlsthepresent
I'm not even sure I would want to go through chemo. Spare the poor kitty the suffering and when things get rough put her down gently.
ismellmagicmarkers
this.
mottolotto
Ill be honest with you. I grew up in the woods. There was always a harsh joke. "Why take 'em in amd spend a 100 whrn you can stay home...
Hoshizaki78
Putting down a beloved pet is hard. I have seen pets the owner should have let go of, so sad. My thoughts are with you as a pet owner.
Lionskull
It doesn't know that you are doing it. From it's perspective you're taking care of it. It would not want you to sacrifice your well being.
FussyZeus
Make sure you stay with her till the end. It sucks ass but I chickened out of my first cats passing, it's one of my deepest regrets in life.
TurduckenMcNugget
Same
TheMarvinator
Me too
Evern
As a volunteer that sat with pets who were left on their own at the end: thank you for being there from then on. It makes such a difference.
FussyZeus
At the time I wasn't financially able to have my cat put down. Had to surrender him to a shelter at 18 years, knowing damn well he would 1/
FussyZeus
never get adopted out. I don't know how long he went for, can't imagine it was long. I just hope he can forgive me when I see him again. 2/2
sunyudai
To be perfectly honest... chemo would be the line where I would choose to put my cats down. It's horrific, and I don't think they are...
sunyudai
likely to have a decent quality of life during or after. If the success rates were better, maybe, but as it stands, no.
LetDarknessDrainYou
Have you try setting up a go fund me page for your kitty
pottertherotter
Give her all your time while you still have her. Choose to spend your nights at home right meow, it'll benefit both of you. So sorry, @OP.
pottertherotter
Your girl loves you, you are her family. She will pass knowing you were with her every step of the way, and that you love her. That is huge.
pottertherotter
Damn onion ninjas.... your fuzzy baby will be in my thoughts. Message me if you wanna talk. Sorry again, @OP. This never gets easier.
TacoCatte26
She had to go one day. Don't torture her for the remaining time she has. Also insure your next cat. Pet insurance pays for itself.
pheran
Insurance premiums are designed so it doesn't pay for itself on average. Otherwise the insurance company wouldn't make any money.
cmsport2
Seconded! I tell everyone to insure their pets. My puppy swallowed a bunch of string once and tangled in her guts. Would have cost me 1/2
cmsport2
over $2000 on my own. Ended up with only 700 out of pocket. Also covers checkups and vaccinations. Totally worth it! 2/2
Wanderer56
How much it cost to insure your pet ?
cmsport2
It depends on your provider, age/breed/species and chosen level. Mine is $45 a month and covers majority of illness/accidents/vaccines.
Wanderer56
Thanks for the answer. But I find it expensive. Got 2 cat. vaccine, tick & a Vet visit cost me 300$ a year for both
VanessaPearl
Does it?? Insurance, that is?
VanessaPearl
Nah....that’s not a thing. Ever
nmc99
Yes, but get the right insurance company. If it’s US or Canada, I recommend Trupanion by FAR.
SlappedStupid
I'm not sure I agree. The plans I looked at (in Aussie) all seemed too expensive for what you get. I put that money aside for them instead.
JunkGrave
Same is true in USA.
CountessVonFingerbang
I agree (in US) especially since a lot of coverage I would have needed would have been hereditary issues the insurance doesn't cover.
MetaSomma
Must be regional then, pupper insurance paid for itself after mine got a couple UTIs and worms, which aren't terribly expensive to treat
pugglesworth
It depends. It's $50 a month for me and covers up to like 10g for surgery after 500 out of pocket and dental and prescriptions too
pugglesworth
I had it for a couple months until my rescue was 100% healthy because he cost a lot to save
WarKittyKat
I could scrape the money together, if I thought chemo was likely to work. But not for "it sometimes adds a few months in dogs."
Hawkzord
Went through a very similar situation with a dog I loved. Don't over think this. Just love your friend, and let her go when its time.
Hawkzord
Animals don't fear death like we do. Quality of life is paramount. You're already giving that to her.
BaldVinnie
You made the right decision! We did Chemo for my Rotti, He ended up with Toxicity from it and very sick in his last days...
BaldVinnie
...Then the veterinary oncologist tells us that it's always a long shot with dogs and it only ever buys them 6-9 months at best. Shattered
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Koshunae
I wish humans understood this, and why Im a supporter of medically assisted suicide. If the QoL is not there, then it is -
Koshunae
More inhumane to keep someone alive than it would be to assist their death.
pugglesworth
That's so sad. I'm sorry for his suffering and your loss :( my boys are only 2 and 3 but I dread the day I have to make those decisions
WarKittyKat
Harder to insure adult rescues like her too - plus the late spay means she was always more likely to get cancer.
dragosteakae
Also in the US, lots of vet places still don't take vet insurance. : / At least where I live.
Klove12
Where do you live? In Canada, it is easy as pie to insure a rescued cat. Most good rescues have free pet insurance trails actually
erischilde
Yeah don't worry about the insurance. Even with money, chemo is so hard in animals with so little evidence of helping. It wouldn't have/1
erischilde
Changed that fact, having money. So sorry op, is such hard stuff, but that's part we have to accept when we adopt them. Wish you 2 happyns/2
Faerinn
Banfield has a good pet insurance plan. I pay 30 dollars a month, and it helps a ton any time my kitties have to go to the vet.
Faerinn
2/ Itll only work at banfield, but they have good vet staff, and you get a free yearly dental cleaning and some other great freebies.
TransrectalPalpation
As a vet, we all have our limits. I could not afford chemo for my own. Our job is to inform you. It's your job to decide. Agree with others.
AVoiceOfReason
I would like if vets didn't skirt around the options of making our furry friends comfortable if there's no chance of full recovery. I (1)
AVoiceOfReason
have taken care of many animals and they all don't want to say it. I think it would help people cope better if they were told it's okay (2)
AVoiceOfReason
to consider that as an option, and not feel guilty or guilty enough to bankrupt themselves and also draw out the pain of their fur babies.
cakeycakes
My vet did this when there was no cure for my dog's prostate cancer. I was grateful for it. Pain meds made him act like he wasn't sick...
cakeycakes
And it gave me nearly a year longer with him. I am grateful.
TransrectalPalpation
Keep kitty happy for as long as possible, if you see any changes, don't hesitate to take her to the vet (even if you aren't sure whats next)
toastfrancaise
My vet once told me there is a 95% chance that mammary tumors return. Does chemo prevent that?
4thStateOfMatter
We did the $ surgery but breast cancer spread to other organs....bought 16 months (no chemo)...
FinneganBojangles
Is ... is treating transrectal palpations your veterinary specialization?
TransrectalPalpation
What can I say? I love butt stuff.
MuffyTheHamburgerSlayer
Let me just say that, while it's your job to inform it would also be nice to let owners know it's OK to not go to extreme measures. 1/2
AVoiceOfReason
I agree. If you're a vet, please tell people it's okay to let them die comfortably instead of draw out their suffering, if that's best.
MuffyTheHamburgerSlayer
Imparting that palliative care and euthanasia are equally valid options in a non-judgemental way helps with the guilt of a bad situation.
TransrectalPalpation
I never word it as "it's okay to do this instead", but I do present alternatives as needed. I cannot expect an owner to choose from 100
TransrectalPalpation
Treatment options, but I usually say "if given unlimited resources, this is that I recommend", "this is another option", "or we can xyz".
TransrectalPalpation
Palliative care and humane euthanasia are discussions I have daily.
CountessVonFingerbang
When my dog got very, very sick unexpectedly, we had to say "what would you be doing if it was your dog," and the vet said 1/2
CountessVonFingerbang
"He's not going to get better. It would be better for you to be here as he passes." Made a terrible decision easier.
CountessVonFingerbang
AND NOW I'M CRYING AT MY DESK.
sirbartonslady