deutschethos
311018
8834
191
Lorde Voldermort
Part 2: http://imgur.com/gallery/bwjli
rattlebone10
These are so good.
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
That's nice.
strangecharmquark
In supernatural, why don't they just buy hoolahoops and fill them with salt and carry them around? Or make belts out of tubing with salt???
causticcoquette
As someone that does not use Tumblr, my initial Google search led me to believe that TBOT meant Traditional Bowhunters of Texas.
thesunisgettingreallow
+1 for Supernatural references!!
Equreuil
the one about raising a kid is so spot on, it's not even funny, it's just scary.
foreverimgurian
It's dark and I wasn't expecting the voldemort one....I almost screeched
JesseBrucePinkman
Supernatural <3
linneah
Omg congrats on your username ;)
jojomymathteacherwearsgoggles
These always make me feel like tumblr is a magical place of constant hilarity, and I want to go there. ...but then I know better.
DeadlyLittleKate
It just depends on who you follow. Some people only post nerdy or funny shit, others only post drama. Just follow the right people.
badinplaid
justintimberlakedoingthings is my favorite tumblr.
thankyousirmayihaveanother
I lost my shit at the raspy baby.
ImmaStealYoReactionPics
Keylimepie: I'll get off my high horse when you get out of your short bus.
Twenty3Skidoo
In Hebrew, the first three letters are ABT: aliph, bet, and tet. That's the explanation I was given for why it's called the Alphabet.
SojournerTooth
I just read all of these in backwards succession and now I don't know what to do with my life.
Manzellina
I guess I'll sleep now
CommanderDick
That Pikachu one, hahaha.
Ravenuser
I died. Well...so did someone else...
Nineteenletterslong
Yep, because it was the only funny post.
DishonoredUser
You're right - this post was pretty lukewarm in terms of funny.
MundaneFacts
as a lifeguard, this one bothers me. I know it was fixed quickly, but THAT PLUSHIE GOING TO KILL SOMEONE.
punxsutawneyphyllis
As a former lifeguard, it bothered me as well, but then I thought about how cool it would be if someone made a Pikachu-shaped defibrillator.
Dogsarecoolerthancats
I laughed so hard at that
queefingkitten
Why is this top comment lol
IAmNotRoy
Whenever someone mentions the last picture in a post I think they did it just to prove to everyone they made it through the whole thing.
MissMoosette
I think this is the best one of these posts I've read.
deutschethos
Thank you! I've made more
hellifiknowwhatsgoingon
i died at the "baby calling you nigga in a deep raspy voice" XD Woke up my roommate. she died too.
SlightlyOverripeBanana
Tattoo sleeve or career? Be a chef and have both!
DylanSchiester
I've found the beginning.
comebacklaterimthinkingofsomethingfunnytosay
I... I made it. All the way to the end... T'was a pleasant journey.
CampanulaMonkshood
That salt one got me thinking; salt burns ghosts and demons but our sweat has salt in it, I don't get why they would possess us 1/2
CampanulaMonkshood
since they would basically be wearing acid suits.
variabletfortime
Hey, Just time travelling to tell you: The Body protects them.
CampanulaMonkshood
Whoa, really? When was this discussed?
variabletfortime
It only took half a year, but demons/ghosts can pass over lines of salt while in a human body and can be forced out if the host consumes it.
xenathewarriorprincesswashot
αλφάβητο. The more you know.gif
eatened
Czech this out: Abeceda
mechalynx
You'd know, being Greek and all XD
xenathewarriorprincesswashot
shh, don't tell everyone :P
KingOfTheInterwebz
alphabetagammadeltaepsilondzetaetathetayotakappalambdamunu (1/?)
KingOfTheInterwebz
ksiomikronpirosigmatauupsilonphichipsiomega. Yes, by heart.
JamesBluntThatSmartassCunt
My Greek is REEEEEALLY rusty. I'm curious, is that a lower-case Beta, or a lower-case Lambda?
BingleyBingleyBeep
It says "a l ph a b e t o".
xenathewarriorprincesswashot
λ= lowercase lambda, β= lowercase beta
MyrtletheMagnificent
There aren't any capitals in there. Lower case beta looks like an english B with a decender, and lower case lambda is an upsidedown y.
ByThePowerOfSCIENCE
Wait till you know why it's called "the ABCs"
smoke928
75001
Barkinsons
The suspense is killing me
cheesypundit
because it starts with AB, see?
EmmaItalia23
I'm upvoting you solely because of your username. Just thought you should know.
ByThePowerOfSCIENCE
At least you like me because of myself (:
excesivo
In spanish it's called either "Alfabeto" or "Abecedario"
ByThePowerOfSCIENCE
En algunos países, "el abecé" (:
Pathologus
http://imgur.com/vKhchDc CHUUUUUUU..... CHUUuuuuu.... chuuuuu.... ;(
FlufflesTheGreat
:(
an0malousSpacefucker
now was that REALLY necessary?!
RoxSezMee
HOW DARE YOU
TheGrounded
Oh god, why'd you have to bring up the old feels? :(
Orangutango
My sister cried during this scene and I laughed at her. I cried later when no one was watching
PetrificusTotalus
Y u do dis
sciencecatmeow
THAT HAD ME IN TEARS MAN! TEARS!
fulcrume
Yes, this was sad, but the rest of the Pokemon crying and having their tears revive him was just too cheesy for me to not cringe about.
jrau18
Bitch, don't you know electric types don't work against ground types? That is literally your fucking job, Pikachu.
[deleted]
[deleted]
kurodansei
Pretty sure electricity is still not very effective against rock types... But I haven' t played in forever so I could be oh so wrong.
dickspickle
THIS IS GEN 1 MOTHERUCKER(i think there are no ground types, right?)
kittyclawz
CUBONE, MUHHFUKKA
SassySemen
About the blowjob thing... Can't dudes just jack off. Like why does it have to be a mouth doing the work?
Styrr
Because sex with someone is cool beans.
vexxed14
Not nearly the same relaxing experience. If it was, we wouldn't be chasing girls around so hard
jrau18
Because they're trying to use it to get blowjobs.
SassySemen
Well I didn't know if it had to do with like dudes just relaxing and not having to work. Idk...
tiam1985
No, it's ejaculation in general that lowers risk of heat disease & prostate cancer. Doesn't have to come from a BJ.
SassySemen
Well then
JPBStory
Correlation =/= causation. Happiness slightly aids health. Happiness correlates with good relationships which correlate with oral sex.
Waidonut
They'd also live longer if they got castrated :D....
neffynuggets
Because science dammit, science said so
helpidontknowmyname
I wonder if it was a controlled study, with matched men (married status, socio-economic, etc) or if it really is just that the men women 1/2
helpidontknowmyname
will blow are healthier specimens with better lives in general. 2/2
SassySemen
Someone should do a thing like this though
suomynonA
I volunteer as tribute!
Chev8t8
How dare you use logic here? You just cheated some poor bastard out of a blowjob, and possibly caused his death. You should be ashamed.
SassySemen
For all you know I could be part of the evil lesbian group and thus my plan worked perfectly! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Chev8t8
Is that how this is going to play out? The evil lesbians trying to kill all the men, and the heroic gay men giving blowjobs to save them?
SassySemen
YES
MellowButDramatic
Because it has to be, orright? It does! Do we have to justify every little thing?
SassySemen
Yes.
Picklefoot
Great civilizations have risen and fallen from promised blowjobs.
Solastro
I'll ask, TBOT?
BearAttack
Comment for the best not-answers.
FatassFangle
Turd Burglar On Toast
causticcoquette
Traditional Bowhunters of Texas. Google told me so.
holymackarel
to be honest tho.
holymackarel
wait... fuck...
gotkrypto
THAT's the best? Well fuck, glad I don't go there.
hi16512
Those Bitches On Tumblr
mocat08
It's actually The Best of Times...
NooneintheVerse
The Best Of Tumblr
BodaciousBeaver
Twerk Booty Ohhh Twerk
VeryMagical
That bastard over there.
IJustWantMyGodDamnEggs
Tinsel Bitches Of Tehran
JanitorJo
TheBestOfTumblr
MissMoosette
I clicked on this confident I'd find the answer, I'm too early.
Pharya
I haaaaaate it when that happens...
theoldlickaroo
But there's a correct response from 10 mins ago!
Renarde
Think it's supposed to be "the best of tumblr"
BearAttack
You and your logic.
CanIHaveOneOfYourFriesNoLikeJustOne
That makes more sense than the "Tid Bits of Tumblr" that I thought it was.
Solastro
AH, makes more sense than Tumbler But Off Tumbler
eveariel
Tumblr.
howmanyuserscouldausernamenameifausernamecouldnameusers
I had it more picture as tumblr-bot, some dark powerful robot compiling the weekly funnies.
itsawerewolfbarmitzvah
the best of tumblr
ByThePowerOfSCIENCE
Twat Bastards Over at Tumblr
bhifi
Win
blackdynamitesmustache
I read this comment and immediately stopped caring what TBOT may really mean. This is the definition now in my heart
AdmiralGeneralAladeenissoAladeen
Ah yes. I now decree TBOT now means - Twat Bastards Over at Tumblr
ItscoldoutsideTheresnokindofatmosphere
You. I like you. Your username and comment - http://imgur.com/oj4EhmE
ByThePowerOfSCIENCE
ItscoldoutsideTheresnokindofatmosphere
You're my new favorite Imgurian.
RoachSketches
I love you.
Ispentthelastfewyearsbuildingupanimmunitytoiocanepowder
The tattoo one. Every day. I hate that I have to pick between how I want to express myself and a job that I'll likely hate anyway
SerialKitten666
I'm glad some places are getting over this ridiculous notion that tattoos mean you're a bad person. If anything, shows you can commit
saradactyl
Its not impossible. I'm assistant manager of marketing and my boss likes my sleeve. But heaven forbid I wear jeans to the office...
MajesticBastard
You can definitely have a sleeve and manage to cover it at work. People at my office have no idea I have a sleeve and I've been there a year
okbluejays
Today I saw a cop with two full sleeves... So...
Ringshadow
Join a trade. Half the Union people I work with have tattoos, sleeves or otherwise.
phips
I am a male nurse and with so few nurses here I can do almost anything I want with my body, because they'd be really dumb to fire me
GetSchwifty
Just saying but if my catholic highschool can have a teacher with multiple visible tattoos, then I think every job should.
IWishLifeWasHD
I've got a sleeve and I managed to land a pretty sweet job in IT the other week :) It's all about who's your boss I guess :/
Ispentthelastfewyearsbuildingupanimmunitytoiocanepowder
I have a tattoo on my shoulder that can be totally covered up by 90% of shirts and still catch flack for having one...
IWishLifeWasHD
Stereotypes are a ballache, WE'RE GOOD PEOPLE DAMN IT.
Somefagfromcanada
Guys, we can lower the risk of heart disease if we just work together.
MarshawnLynch
Holy fuck, that username
JonquilPls
:)
BatmansFirstEnemyWasCalledManBat
I'm straight but...heart conditions are common in my family, OH GOD.
Mycologics
Back to the gay pile!
chaoschampion
Well if Pikachu had been more proactive about giving blowjobs then we wouldn't have to use him as a defibrillator.
BetterLuckyThanGood
This is why I can't take feminists seriously. Guys act worse toward each other in mock-homosexuality than they ever do toward women on 1/2
BetterLuckyThanGood
2/2 the internet. I understand if homosexual males hated us because we constantly PRETEND to be like them, but no one actually wants to.
Somefagfromcanada
Oh, i was serious.
UserSubmariner
Nope
BopNiblets
I don't understand how evil lesbians uniting will result in less blowjobs...
JPBStory
"Hahahaaa! We won't do things we definitely weren't going to do anyway!"
Cintilleous
*Gays
Gayzach
I'm down
Somefagfromcanada
our usernames are weird synonyms.
BubblesTheFish
I ain't gay, but 20 more minutes of life is 20 more minutes of life.
Lumberjackfirefighter
As a gay dude, im really fine with this! :)
RainbowsRainbowsEverywhere
liathum
I had no idea I needed this. Thank you.
HungryPumpkn
No way this is real, but i KNOW boob fondling reduces breast cancer by 300%.
DeadlyLittleKate
Well then it's a good thing women have hands.
Zoogster22
Omg that name
SwedishGuyYesIDoHaveLongBlondHairWhy
Shut up and eat your gays
ITalkAboutGoats
Gayloops, it's even fruiter now!
MyPieBringsAllTheDeansToTheYard
Bro jobs!!!
(sfw)
dammitcas
A+ username.
ghostofryuchan
You would read that at work?
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
HAHAH wtf!!!
msa011
He said 'no homo' tho
SapiensMakeMeErectusNoHomo
Right? Right? Guys? He did say "no homo" didn't he?
IJustMadeAnAccountForThat
Did he really? He never said he did
iDrinkDrano
*sighs* *unzips*
Chev8t8
Put it back.
iDrinkDrano
*sighs* *zips*
Somefagfromcanada
c'mon. I wasn't done curing heart disease, where are you going?
iDrinkDrano
How can I turn down that user name? now come, let's cure prostate cancer.
ThatMomentWhenImgurJokesAreOnlyFunnyToImgurians
*whispers* shhh were saving lives
iDrinkDrano
Shut up and get back in the pile.
jrau18
Don't sigh, you'll enjoy it.
Somefagfromcanada
You. I like you.
Shirlox
I like all the penis that this would bring.
iDrinkDrano
That's the point of the manpile, no?
77Phenom
We litteraly call it "alphabeta" in Greece guys
whatsthisusernameofwhichyouspeak
So what came first, the order of the words in the alphabet or the word alphabet? Was there an alphabet before alphabet?
Chev8t8
Whenever people refer to non-greco symbolic languages as "alphabets" I simultaneously rage and die inside.
Chev8t8
Since people keep sending me the same messages, I'll clarify. What bothers me is teh lack of distinction between an alphabet and scripts.
Chev8t8
It's more of an annoying linguistics thing than an actual complaint.
77Phenom
Hahaha well they didn't learn better!
yehonatans
In Hebrew its the Aleph bet...(First letter is Aleph and second is Bet)
Chev8t8
What I'm really talking about is referring to east asian writing systems as "alphabetic", despite not using a true alphabet, but "scripts".
Chev8t8
Greek is based on phoenician,semitic, and aramaic script. Many mediterranean scripts developed concurrently. Those are bad counterexamples.
yehonatans
My point is it goes farther than greco languages.
Chev8t8
I have to agree, but those languages are all related anyway, but my point focussed on non-greek and mediterranean languages.
heretohelp
Why? The definition of "alphabet" is something along the lines of "symbols that make up written language", so of course everyone who speaks
Chev8t8
That definition is too vague, and some languages aren't alphabetic. Some are logographic or Syllabic. What you described are Scripts.
Chev8t8
You'll also notice that most if not all Alphabetic languages are based upon grecian, and altered by either latin, glagolitic, or demotic.
heretohelp
English uses that word to describe the non-greco symbols that make up other languages, such as Chinese.
heretohelp
In short, pick something reasonable to rage and die about.
Chev8t8
I can't help it, I'm hypercritical and extremely non-rational at times.