Hero, leading a parade that he did not want

Feb 29, 2024 5:08 AM

BleebBloop

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95508

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2077

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33

1. Hello imgur !

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31. One of my favorite quotes from Welcome to Night Vale

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42. OMG YOU CAN DELELTE AN IMAGE NOW !! NO NEED TO START THE WHOLE DUMP OVER WHEN THERE'S A DOUBLE !!

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#1 Tutorial Inception lol

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#45 I tried a variation on this. My little brother was running very quickly towards a Very Steep Hill, so I stuck out my arm to slow him down, expecting to catch him and redirect his momentum back towards where he came... I clotheslined the poor kid

2 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

#1 Those videos are good only if nothing goes wrong.
I've been around enough people who knew what they were doing to know that something always goes sideways. That's where experience of prior screw ups comes in.

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

#43 - TIL that apparently my brother is a DILF. He'll be rapt when I let him know.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#20 The white throated sparrow has four sexes.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#2 In the Netherlands old houses have a hook-like structure on the front of the house. It was used to hoist up bigger pieces of furniture! Although we usually opened/removed the windows

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#43 Example 1 - David Tennant

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#22 Can’t top THAT story.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#27 Walmart pours bleach on food they are throwing out?

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

having worked for walmart, I don't know if this is true, but I'm gonna guess it is, because holy fuck it's walmart.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#42 The best way to learn a language is to try and speak it, even if you don't know how to do it properly. A person who speaks a language poorly in public is doing something that requires courage in order to improve themselves.

2 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 0

Gwah szayd.

2 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

#2 listen to Bernard Cribbins "Right Said Fred"

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

#47 is too real. That’s the whole “triggered” bullshit these fucks pull

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#25 There's a restaurant called The Gastrognome in Idyllwild, CA. I go there at least once a year.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#22 I'm proud of this Anon. They killed a bigot and helped create a more decent person.

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#43 okay but between you and me, why?

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

People are allowed their kinks.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You don't call someone skinny a BBW

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#43 i feel SEEN

2 years ago | Likes 43 Dislikes 0

I suspect many of these creators of so called Dilfs haven't met many dads.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

tommy chardonnay?? He's the opposite of a dilf, he's a small twink, do words have meaning anymore?

2 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

5'10" isn't small, the rest stands.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

he might be tall vertically, but he's built like, and has the presence of a wire coat hanger

2 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

#5 One of the Hitchhiker‘s Guide to the Galaxy books contains a solution to that problem: just erect a simple POOP field (Problem Of Other People). The mountain will become practically invisible because everybody will just overlook it.

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

#2 Mathematically this makes perfect sense. You wouldn't lift a safe over a sidewalk packed full of people so a person would have to be exactly in the wrong spot at the wrong second to be hit by a safe. The hole is there for hours or days though, and if you don't fill it in or block it off anyone walking by unattentively could fall in.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

#43 deep truths.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#43 I make similar arguments about MILFs. Just because a 16yo spat out a baby does not make her a MILF. That's stupid.

2 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

Aye, a MILF has gotta have teenage kids, whose friends declare her a MILF. It is The Law.

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Some people just call anyone with a vag and some life experience a milf and it gets annoying. I identify as nonbinary and am personally disturbed by the idea that my body could even go through pregnancy - do not want - and being called a milf for my female presenting body and age is so far from applicable... I am not a mother and will never be a mother so please don't assign the role to me just because I have a vagina and am no longer part of "the youth"

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

#5 Mining. Dwarfs mined under the mountain, creating a huge dungeon that was visited regularly by adventures. On one visit a wizard decided to cast a fireball into the darkness, hitting big old pile of mining explosives, causing the whole dungeon to collapse and the mountain too. On a quiet night you can still hear the yells of the barbarian calling the wizard a fucking trigger happy idiot.

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

#16 economy is fun!

2 years ago | Likes 61 Dislikes 0

I think you mean !!FUN!!

2 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's not fun unless it's on !!FIRE!! and slowly melting the body of someone who went stark raving mad...
Tantrum spirals for days (or even for life)!

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

dwarf fortress is just communism.

2 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

Yes, because capitalism doesn't work.

2 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

I just have to point out to anyone downvoting this: that's the point of #16 - he tried to make capitalism in dorf fort, but had to take it out because it didn't work.
As for IRL... Well, nothing really works, because it's all full of people, and eventually people will be bastards. Long live the mechanical uprising: We Deserve It.

2 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

only 10% of people are bastards but they end up usually being the people wanting to be in charge.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

So get rid of "in charge." I'm serious. This is the only solution to that problem.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#2 old stairs didn't have a minimum width? Big deal. You ever walk on old stairs and the treads are too small and each step is too high? God forbid their be variables in those sizes because that's a whole other nightmare.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

I work in Germany and my company has another office in Belgium. Each time I'm there, I notice that they must have different building standards, as the steps of their stairs are less deep than on any modern stair I have ever used in Germany. It's unnerving and feels very wrong.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm mostly remembering a house I worked in 10 to 15 years ago. I still remember it. They were very tall steps which wasn't exactly the problem...the real problem was that, while the tread was big enough, the rise was angled in such a way that the tread was half the size going down.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

The house was built in the 1930s I think.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

We have an old stone stair case in Stockholm where earth movement has moved the stairs, it's only 1-2cm of height difference between steps but it really makes you stumble if you're not aware of it.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

#10 "The first though that goes through your mind is what you have been conditioned to think. What you think next defines who you are"

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Blue shirt is his internal self calling out his baloney.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#48 Pretty sure that's 'Deadpool 2'...

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

A European Christian Monk class? In Dragon Magazine #68 a Cloistered Cleric class appeared for 1e AD&D. Aarakocra? Birds a feathered dinosaurs. A bard with a washboard? Is he Creole? Is he going wear it as a vest frottoir to play zydeco with it? A sentient hat? In D&D there are magical intelligent swords that could possibly overwhelm & dominate a low level, with low intelligence, low wisdom, low charisma wielder, etc... so there is a basis for making use of other intelligent magic items. (1

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

A drow that's afraid of the dark & spiders? An albino drow that repudiated the ways of his people wasn't enough for you? A peasant farmer that wishes to join the PC party? They would probably be willing to use the farmer as hireling, fulfilling the role of a linkboy (torch/lantern bearer) and/or porter (carries party supplies). A druid cannabis dealer? That would probably take a lot longer to acquire experience versus normal adventuring. A lycanthrope would be affected by the change of phases (2

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

of the moon irregardless of whether or not it believed in it. On second thought... are these supposed to be the Mystery Men?...

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#8 listen, I shipped Korrasami before season 3. Sometimes, your crack ship WILL become canon. Never stop believing!

2 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

To be fair, I don't think even Konietzko and DiMartino had a clue about what they were doing romance wise in that particular iteration. Crack ship were as likely as anything else.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

To be fair, does anyone of us ever know what we're doing when it comes to romance?

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

whoever writes my romance subplot must be French and on strike a lot

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#35 (he does good luck spots too)

2 years ago | Likes 125 Dislikes 0

Yeah I would be walking right through the middle. You don't bring me bad luck, I bring me bad luck

2 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

Bad luck circle? Buddy, my whole life is a bad luck circle

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Pretty sure my inherent nature would make me sit and sprawl in the big empty space no one was walking in.
My bad luck spot now, Felix.

2 years ago | Likes 27 Dislikes 0

I want to believe my logical sense would have me walk through it just fine, but I know that tiny part of me that thinks 'but what if?' and I would end up walking around it just in case

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

The fear factor in superstition isn't that you'd walk across the circle and immediately get hit in the face by a rogue pigeon, because what are the odds.. but rather for the next days weeks months years everytime something catastrophic happens in your life seemingly out of nowhere you'll have that nagging negative guilt in the back of your head, is this because of the circle? I KNEW I shouldn't have fucked with it ::(

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Nah, screw it, I got crap luck anyway, might as well take my chances at making it DISASTROUS luck. More exciting! Then I can blame Felix for my problems.

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Because we’re not all superstitious, but we’re all a little ‘stitious

2 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

Writing's on the floor.

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Stay grounded

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

More like, I don't want to walk on peoples drawings.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Same reason I swerve viciously every time I come across "STOP" painted on the road

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#27 yep, the Bible is pretty socialist. As in, provides guidelines for how to live in a functioning society.
There is slavery, in that people had the option to sell themselves if they couldn't pay a massive debt, but it was time-limited so that generational poverty simply couldn't happen. (And slaves were to be treated well as members of the family, not exploited.)

2 years ago | Likes 145 Dislikes 17

Unless they are foreign slaves, then you get to keep them forever and pass them down to your heirs as property.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

That's a bit of an inaccurately romanticized view, but yes, the Bible did have some good parts and those seem to be the parts its followers don't like to actually follow.

2 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

There were prescriptions on how to beat your slave and also how to trick a Hebrew slave into permanent servitude. Also told Hebrews to take slaves from the nation's around them along with specifically young girl slaves. It was just as bad as any slavery, just accepted as ok in those times.

2 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 2

Yeah, the only part that was *marginally* better was Hebrew men who sold themselves into temporary slavery. For everybody else, it *was* permanent.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

My skin crawls when people frame biblical sky daddy approved slavery as anything other than appalling.

2 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 2

It's historically contextual. It is needed to understand how and why something was written. Going "lol people were so dumb getting exploited, sky daddy lolololol" is a rather naive approach. If you want to learn instead I can recommend "UsefulCharts" on YT, they have a freat series explaining how all the major religions (and their writings) came to be.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 2

Exodus 21:20-21 doesn't get better in context.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Key note, that was ONLY for the Hebrew men. You weren't a Hebrew man, and your ass, and any kids you had, was that family's until you died out or were sold on/escaped. Also of note, you could become a permanent chattel slave if you so desired. ie, your master had your wife and kids still, and you didn't want to be separated from them.

2 years ago | Likes 50 Dislikes 0

Yep. "All humans are human" isn't really a thing when you want your devotees to feel like they're better off in that out.

2 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

I wouldn't consider being beaten so badly you die in more than a couple days well, but I also don't tend to try and spin fucking slavery positively. (Exodus 21:20-21)

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Slavery was not uncommon in history, but the systems of mass slavery seen in The American Plantations with slave labor serving as the foundation of an economy was quite rare.

2 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

Almost as rare as when the European countries bought native Africans land out from under them, decimated their house, plowed under their fields to create their own plantations, then forced the people who had lived there for thousands of years to work their plantations to afford to pay for water and housing.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

That's .. not how colonialism in Africa went. Very few parts of Africa are suitable for large scale plantations. while regions like Belgian Congo saw extreme exploitation, African colonization was a dick measuring contest between Europeans first, a source of resources second. By and large Europeans rocked up with guns to prove they could, puttered around making sure people knew they were important, and post WW2 admitted that they never really knew what to do with them in the first place

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeaaah, and then Paul told slaves under the Roman, chattel slavery system to serve their masters like they would be serving Jesus.

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Much of Hebrew slavery was *also* chattel slavery.

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Including the part with the stick?

2 years ago | Likes 36 Dislikes 0

You do not think that kids/wives did not also get the stick? So, yes, "as well as family" often (sadly) includes physical abuse.

2 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Still does!

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

"Well" Is relative. Far and high way better than how we did slavery in the US. Slaves then were still considered people.

2 years ago | Likes 26 Dislikes 7

No. They are specifically referred to as 'money'. They were directly defined as property.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

'well' Only counted for fellow jews in slavery, foreign nationals were a ok in the bible.

2 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Uhh… that is a somewhat generous description.

2 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

When bible thumpers defend any type of slavery I remember organized religion is a sham and it's all about control of the masses.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Just to be clear, if you thought I was trying to defend any of anyone's slavery, I wasn't.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nope. Read the slave codes for the southern states, and then compare them to the biblical ones. A common boast of slave states was that they treated their slaves better than the bible did. And sure, the laws were better, but no one cared about enforcing the law in antebellum US, and you can bet that they didn't care to enforce it during biblical times, either.

2 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

I'll admit that I've never looked too deep into the details surrounding slavery in ancient times. But I haven't seen any reports on them nailing slave babies to trees as holiday decorations, so I'm leaning on our slavery being worse.

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 1

Here's the thing, that was illegal by US slave codes. Very illegal. But it's just a bunch of n***** babies, so why should we do anything to the fine, upstanding white plantation owner. Selective enforcement is an old, old thing. You're comparing practice versus law, when we only know the law in common for both societies. Considering the awful shit we do have stories of the Hebrews getting up to, I'd bet they did just as if not more awful shit.

2 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0