OceansRust
39551
1755
11
Swag On The Beat parody of a major Australian DIY Home Improvement and Outdoor Living Retailer's ad (Bunnings).
#funny #awesome #comedy #australia #mildly_interesting
Jun 6, 2025 8:45 PM
OceansRust
39551
1755
11
Swag On The Beat parody of a major Australian DIY Home Improvement and Outdoor Living Retailer's ad (Bunnings).
#funny #awesome #comedy #australia #mildly_interesting
colinstu
Germans reading that hoodie: "I..."
userfriendly19777
Standard curriculum at the school of commerce.
jaggcomputing5
They turn over AU$19B pa. In a country with a population of about 25M. Fucking huge company.
MmmmmSoup
Bunnings has everything
kerrmilla
Happy pride month to these two and their positive bullshit
ayeseaturtles
https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1bHJ4M2w0MXh0Z291OWswcWdnZTNncnp4NW5wcXRyZnI1dzFzM284ZSZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/m6km5Bq7WXQp5ssUgE/200w.webp
fofunn
https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1Ymxhc3kwOXcxZjNlemZnYmFzNHU1MzBycmE0MDd3aTI0NGdjdDJvMyZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/hpSOjkcvhDgbv9p92R/200w.webp
YippeeKayakOB
I strongly identify with this.
StubbDubya
Came here just for this.
itgoeshere
That guy doesn't even work there
skippingmyhsreuniontogetdrunkinmydriveway
Don't forget to grab your charity snag on the way out.
NotNateEz
This isn't Lowes or Home Depot. I get angry just looking for someone to help me, and half the time they don't know what I'm talking about.
MarkSengenberger
I once had pretty much the entire floor crew at Lowe's wondering where the hell they got flashlights.
OverwhelmingSurplusOfDiggity
What would it take for him to tell me how they get the caramel inside the caramilk bar?
IntelligentLake
The caramel gets inside the bar or else it gets the hose again.
Lontri
I went to biltema the other day and asked an employee where the zip ties are. Down this corridor to shelf six in the next section, left side of the shelf. Such good instructions!
Back when I worked in retail, we were told to escort customers to the item they were asking for. It was a bit annoying at times.
Calistrasza
I love Biltema just for the fantastic customer service. I never really need anything in there, but if I ever do, I know someone can always point me exactly where I need to go
Gliocas
When I managed an antique mall, I would hide a small stuffed animal near an item, then play hide and seek with it and new employees. Explain the item, then describe if they needed help. Helped them learn new terminology as well as item locations. Our computer could tell them general area but this about 10,000 square feet of jam packed antiques and collectibles. I had great fun at that job.
HuskyHairExtraordinaire
I WISH the people at Bunnings were this knowledgeable (about hardware). The amount of time I've wasted there because the only person who 'might' know something about plumbing, or sprinklers, or lawn mower replacement valves etc, 'but they've just gone on their break, if you're willing to hang around for half an hour' is crazy. AND only to have them return from their break and STILL not be able to advise you
boxak
Where can I find this store? I have questions….
OceansRust
Australia
Meowzebub666
I had a local hardware store like this. The guy who would always help us looked, sounded, and acted exactly like a day drunk Steve Brule, but we never left without getting precisely what we needed and detailed instructions on how to complete our project. Company got bought out by ace hardware and sucks now.
Smayds
Make Your Life Grouse
Agarast
The customer chap would look pretty outstanding, if he had his hair taken care of. Lovely eyes.
eepsheep
Yeah! And he should smile more!
BulgogiBolognese
Tell me you don't live in Australia without telling me you don't live in Australia.
Thing is: if he looks like that it means: he doesn't take himself to serious, he will take down people a notch who need it, he respects women, he will make a lot of queers wonder if he is or isn't, and is all around pretty chill.
But there is a fine line as somebody looking quite similar to him might just be the biggest dickhead around. It all is in the vibe.
And weirdly which state/territory.
freakdiablo
This is definitely NOT a Home Depot. Last time I asked for help - "Hey I need some masonry screws. I don't really care about size or type, they're just for sticking 4' of small plastic cable channel to cinderblock." HD rep - "Uhhhhhh... Do we carry those?"
darkbacon
"You've got questions, we've got aprons." Which is why I go to the locally-owned hardware store. If they have it, they can show you exactly where to find it. They might be slightly higher, but I can be in and out in less than five minutes with the item(s) I wanted.
jridley
I shop at Menards. The people there are pretty great, but I also have their app on my phone; one of the only shopping apps I have. It's pretty good and tells me exactly where something is in the store.
Cilvaa
Bunnings is one of those places where I'll go there for one thing, spend an hour just looking around, and then leave with 6-7 things.. I love it!
sqeaky
The acting in this is so good, the look on his face is pure disbelief transitioning to Pure hope as he asks for help with his ex.
afroniner
But can he see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?
gnomedeplume
cocaine
philmoregraves
I've heard it's the taste you can see
cropduster5000
Don’t ask a question if you’re not ready to hear the answer
afroniner
I mean.... It's a yes or no.
OriginalAndWitty
Sugar. Lots of sugar. Unhealthy amounts of sugar.
TheLookAndFeelMUSIC
In my experience they do have a savant like knowledge of where things are in the store. Also the prices are not the lowest and they treat their suppliers like shit so buy elsewhere if you can. Fan of the customer service and snags though.
AliensProbably
The sausages are 60% bread crumbs, though - so you're basically getting a mildly-meat-flavoured bread-tube-in-a-slice-of-bread.
TheLookAndFeelMUSIC
Wouldn't have it any other way.
11thHourGhost
Bunnings don't supply the snags for the BBQs, that's all left to the community group to handle. They just provide the space and equipment.
Our rugby club does one pretty reg, and we've found, by far and away, the woollies bulk pack snags are best bang for buck, as the one we do can have a really variable customer count/rate, so having them in kilo packs means we can handle rush and lulls better without wastage.
AliensProbably
I'm aware. It's run by a Rotary club at one of my local Bunnings. The Coles bulk sausage packs are primarily bread crumbs, and I imagine the Woolworths ones are similarly halfway-to-vegan.
StopCallingMeIAmNotYourBrother
Meanwhile, I ask for something simple like deck screws and they send me to the plumbing department.
ToasterDent
It's because of your Australian accent - they though you were asking for dick screws for men's urinals.
Eucrow
They always ask me "What?? DECK scroos? Can you describe what you need them for? Oh, uh yeah...they are about 5 miles down that way, past the lumber and to the left."
ddubya42
"Oh, yeah they're on aisle.... *trails off muttering*"
"What was that? Did you say aisle 15?"
"Sure, why not"
Someshithead241
Cos you can't walk around and look for the sign that says "screws" and they just want you out of their face, because they've got a shit ton to do whilst you and 70 other people keep interrupting. Or you just followed instructions wrong.
Plus, and I cannot stress this enough, the people who work there don't automatically know everything about what you might need. Stop asking for suggestions, they just sell you the shit.
MaleProstateMilker88
From the job ads I've seen anyone can apply - which is of course good, but eventually you'd think someone would know where something is - or there abouts. Secondly I went to couple of hardware stores this month and for some reason there was barely any signs, and thing you'd think would be in the plumbing section was not in fact there. So there's a lot that can go wrong which would be OK if the stores weren't gigantic forcing you to look what you need for a long while.
Someshithead241
If they had the trade expertise some people just expect from you in these places (for multiple different trades) then they sure as shit wouldn't be working there.
solutionorppt
They never move the signs. The drywall aisle at mine says "Masonry" - concrete is now in the lawn & garden. Gee, I wonder why I had to ask.
But you're right - everyone working there is too dumb or lazy for a trade and doesn't know a biscuit from a dowel.
Someshithead241
Too dumb and lazy... I'm sure you would think that in your pathetic need to always feel better than some people because they work certain jobs.
I wonder how much of your resteraunt food has a strange taste.
pm1001
Clearly not home depot
shadowofacrow
Must be Ace Hardware... They know all.
BreakerSwitch
On both fronts. My local HD is full of QAnon truthers
RearAdmiralObvious
Its actually target, they've trained their staff better now but, no one goes there anymore so no one knew about it until now.
Heavy /s
SansAandAnguS
No, it's Bunnings! Home of the sausage sizzle, oh and some hardware too.
CityYeti
Must be Hammer Barn
NothingPrince
Bunnings or Hammerbarn for Blue fans.
droningonaboutsomething
It’s Bunnings
pullingsixty
That's HD orange. Fuck those guys.
OnlyBees
Bunnings
tooomanystevesgotbanned
Are they like "What's a screw?"
MmmmmSoup
Nah this is bunnings haha
Thrillhouse45
Fellow Aussie here. It's Bunnings.
bobGrimer
Lies, you just read the description.
DasWauto
https://media3.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTY1YjkxZmJlZW5rYWh2cmNlaHliZ3B5OWg3eXU2aXFmcHB0ZW5xcjF3a2w0ODA4ayZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/hpSOjkcvhDgbv9p92R/giphy.mp4
Wuz314159
If you haven't already, download the app. Set your store and it'll tell you exactly what aisle/shelf.
ThinkingAG
Why use an app for that? It is all on the website.
Wuz314159
Fair point. apps are usually much easier to use on mobile. but nothing wrong with hitting up the website at home and writing the info on a postit.
evilcoffeechick
This is the best part of all the store-specific apps. Thank you for making me less likely to have to talk to someone.
Did have a lovely, informative chat with their tool section guy about a tool I was thinking of buying, though. Still thinking about it.
StrangerNum1
It's to get you ready to not miss them when they are efficient out their purpose
InfocalypseRising
“Can you tell me where to find lumber. Just any lumber.”
“Uhhhhh” (throws smoke bomb and retreats into the shadows)
Valgov291
The number of times I've been to a shoe store and they didn't know what a shoe horn was... wat? Smh
jbrightmans
Home Depot: if over 50, generally helpful; under 30, sometimes doesn't know what a hammer is.
Blud4BludGod
That's because they stopped hiring actual experienced professionals to man the departments they have experience in for like $25-30 an hour, and started hiring whoever they could get at min wage. I worked there in the mid 2000's and they were actively in the process of making that transition. Once upon a time the guy stocking the shelves in the plumbing aisle was an actual plumber, the guy putting lightbulbs on the shelf was an actual electrician. Not so much anymore.
Gliocas
They started this in IT too and pretty much every industry. It is because there is such high demand for work these days. It is why everything breaks and sucks these days.
lolzomg123
A hammer.. that's what you call it when you drink a lotta beer right?
Mmbear
A hammer? Like the time?
jbrightmans
Hammer? I hardly know her.
CyberHexx
Don't go to a retail store expecting experts to be stocking shelves. Experts are working as contractors. Don't get mad at highschool students and people who needed a job. And learn to use the goddamn app.
SmoeAhsolse
Or just the mobile website in an anonymous window. There's no reason they need anything from my phone.
CyberHexx
You don't have to login on the phone.
SmoeAhsolse
You don't have to log in for them to collect a ton of data from your phone. Just install it.
CyberHexx
That's why you lock down that shit as well. De spyware your stuff.
SpikedDoggos
Ace hardware is where you get that catered experience, definitely not the box stores
Phlyn
idk man, i worked at an ace hardware (for a couple days) when i was 17. my first day was "walk around the store" my second day i was shown the key maker. at the end of the second day they had me man the register... with no training.... i never went back.
MyGreatestFearBoner
I appreciate Ace for sure.
LtRooney
I swear you could walk into Ace Hardware with an Uncharted style ancient puzzle box and they'd somehow know exactly what key you need to open it and just have one sitting on a shelf next to the specific fertilizer you need for your next sidequest.
Widgetboy
Helpful Hardware Man here. People do actually bring in the craziest things and expect magic. Sometimes they get it.
LtRooney
I asked for help with electrolytic etching. Ace had exactly the chemicals I needed.
Clippyjustwantedtohelp
I only get this experience from them when I come in an hour before close.
Cruxia13
Not the Ace Hardware near here. Took nearly an hour to get a single can of paint because the guy put in the wrong color code 3 times and when I tried to get him to confirm the color name before mixing it, it was "nah, don't worry! I got it this time" then he'd walk away for 10 minutes only to come back and realize it's the wrong color AGAIN... Never going back.
jridley
Eh, some of them. There's a hardware store near me that's been there about 80 years, they're great, and another that's probably nearly as old and much bigger, they're even better. But the average Ace, eh.
The best was where I grew up, in the 70s, hardware store run by a cranky old coot who lived in the back with his wife. They had EVERYTHING and it was organized in piles, and he knew exactly where everything was.
Eiladar
Around here, Ace is like a subsidized store or something; they're like older mom and pop country stores that paid to have the Ace logo on them.
jridley
Same here. Ace, True Value, Do It, they're franchises. The stores are locally owned. Ace or whatever provides a standardized drop-in inventory. There are levels though. Only the big Do It near me uses the fully-leveled-up inventory; the fastener section that in most stores takes up one wall, in their place is a whole room with 6 aisles. It's where I go if I need something weird like an extra long stainless metric hex cap screw or something.
Eiladar
True. I can usually get anything I need for light repairs or lawn/garden care at Ace, but I need to hit up something like Lowes or Home Despot for specialized tools or components for larger projects.