TheRussMartinShow
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Jul 8, 2019 4:44 AM
TheRussMartinShow
120327
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48
MinorityOpinion
I was turned in to a newt! ... I got better.
beezzarro
I have a fever=wallet. I have a fracture=mastercard
jesusisherelookbusy
“My wife just texted me saying ‘We need to have a serious talk’.” = Mortuary
JamesTrickington87
Kid was brought into the ER because his finger felt tingly and kinda numb. It was January and he'd been out playing in the snow
gorgeousninja
This probably means more when you don’t have access to decent free healthcare
wolmerx
"I need antibiotics" Are you sure?
Lulabel73
If you have the flu and you think it’s serious go get emergency care though. Plenty of people die of the flu.
DaveTheScientist
The flu is in the top 3 deadliest infectious diseases in most developed countries. Most people don't know that.
NorseGod222
They should just put the prices under them.
CygloPargen
I cannot for the life of me figure out what that icon for the plague is supposed to be.
Iwannaseeit
Dead guy on his back, you're seeing his shoes and crotch I guess
JEMbalaya
I called the urgent Care when I had two types of the flu and they couldn't see me until morning. So I went to emergency care and lobby was
JEMbalaya
Empty. Then they told me I had both types of the flu and put me on medicine. I felt like I was dying. Glad I went to ER
thisisausernamelikeanyothersbutthisonesmellsweird
i stepped in a beehive after a snake attack i experienced from getting my hand stuck in a bear trap trying to get help as i have the plague?
meSparkleJumper
Tampa!!
Archbound
The plague one is i4 in tampa, the bee one is near Winter Haven, the antibiotics is also i4.
JustaPatientWolf
Get this to the military...we literally need pictures like these.
somnif
"Need medical help? VA appointment in 6 months. Need medical help now? Bottle of ibuprofin"
PlanckEraWasMyBestEra
I have a couple of chronic conditions and always call Ask A Nurse when they get bad and am told to go to the ER every time to the point I
PlanckEraWasMyBestEra
don't always listen any more because it get ridiculous and it's a lot of time wasted for them to usually say I'm fine and change my meds.
PlanckEraWasMyBestEra
But my point here is that people aren't always going because they are overreacting. Sometimes even your own doctors tell you to go to the ER
MightyIink
My appendix is about to burst... keeps me in waiting room for 3 hours to "see what happens".
squirreltactics
What if you're allergic to bee's?
xo101
Emergency care
hdPandaLord
Eat some Benadryl... you’ll be fine. ?
kriositivity
Canadians needs these billboards, but also they need to be mote serious.
INoLongerCareBoutThisName
“I stepped on a mouse trap”- maybe CVS worthy. More likely “say owww a bunch and use an ice pack”
BlackavarLion
I'm alive, I'm dead.
MarkWhoGivesaFukFrom93Tv
I don't have insurance: Emergency Room
Jakefrost86
You nailed it!!
hdPandaLord
Urgent cares are still cheaper than emergency rooms unless you’re referring to not paying your bill at all then shame on you.
Mudman2999
If you have a choice between not paying a bill st all or dying, it’s shame on the system not the person trying to stay alive
MarkWhoGivesaFukFrom93Tv
Some places I've lived don't have urgent care that will accept you without insurance. Emergency Room are required to help you
Jakefrost86
We need these everywhere. I work in an ER and we have people come in for the dumbest stuff.
xo101
Why go the doctor for a bee sting? I’ve never been stung.
darkdragonempress
Allergic reaction to the bee venom. Can be extremely serious.
xo101
I’d go to emergency then, not urgent care.
darkdragonempress
Yeah. If you don’t have a bad reaction you don’t even have to go to a doctor. Just put on some toothpaste. But for those allergic an ER 1
darkdragonempress
Is a much better choice. 2
PhailRaptor
Only required if you're allergic. Your airways will swell up in response to the venom and you can't breathe. Suffocate.
Mugsybugs
What? Are hospitals funding billboards now?
SisterFister69Hitler
Oh boy where have ya been???
somnif
Urgent Care is more like a local clinic than a hospital. Smaller scale, less extensive, cheaper.
TooFunkToDrunction
They’re like 4 hospitals in my city and they want you to choose theirs, no surprise.
waphles317
A quick google search told me that BayCare is a chain of Urgent Care facilities. So these billboards are meant to attract people to them.
UmIllHaveACokeThen
BayCare is an enormous health system comprising of at least 15 hospitals, 380 medical centers, including urgent care and primary care
brknsoul
Of course they are.. remember, patient care is about making money, not about patient care! /s
Roguetamer
Most urgent cares are only open during normal business hours. After hours you've got no choice sadly.
thatVoIPdude
Ours is open at a random time around 1PM. Get there at exactly 1, they're full for the day. Get there too early, you're told to leave and
thatVoIPdude
come back at 1. I've never successfully found out how to get seen by a doctor there.
Exoph
Well if it's something that isn't an emergency it can wait until the morning
MobileKeepsMessingUp
Sure, I'll just keep walking around with broken bones or an infection over the weekend. It's called urgent care for a reason.
Roguetamer
Infections, even minor. If left overnight can become much worse if not life threatening. $50 at a UC or $1100 at ER b/c of business hours.
PolishPancakeWithCanadianMapleSyrup
Our city has increased the number of urgent care facilities and hours to help the massive wait times in the ER (Ont. Can.)
ps238principal
"Where did you find a set bear trap?"
meSparkleJumper
In Florida??
TimeAndMemeLordOfGallifrey
Walmart?
PhailRaptor
It's the only way that one girl's hook-up can cum
RPhoenix
It's more likely than you'd think.
deweydefeatstrumanagain
Bear traps, in my bear traps?
nonCanadianGoose
My closet for starters
GingerLaird
Where do bears normally shit in the woods?
oddoregano
Bears shit where ever the fuck they want.
VladTheInhaler1
Sometimes they shit on doorsteps
Yellowscorpion
Ah but you see that's why I place bear traps on my doorstep
GingerLaird
AH, but the path between where they shit and where they do bear things is where you might find an active bear trap.
AThreeFootTallChocolateMooseWithFudgeEyes
the woods
crimsonghost65
“I stepped on a Lego” = Morgue
Jaaybiird
Best comment ever
kalabash
Themineturtle12
Ded
SincerePlatypus
They haven't finished the new ethical insta-kill design yet.
austenbronte
orangemarmaladesky
McNuggetFarmer
Hospitals don't need advertisement. You only go when needed to the closest one, unless I'm being Canadian centric here
cbale2000
There's two hospitals in my town in close proximity to each other. One has better care, the other has (much) shorter wait times.
EmeraldLight
I'm Canadian and have never seen an urgent care clinic. We have scheduled appointments or the ER.
Zicora
The closest one may not have the services you need however. Depending on the problem getting transfered can be wasted time.
Gantzz321
every Canadian hospital has the ability to stabilize a patient prior to transporting them
textilelover
Some hospitals are not great, some are great at some things but not others. Definitely shop around if you have time.
CommisarFuklaw
I don't think this is as much an advertisement as it is a PSA.
Gantzz321
then why post there brand info on the sign
MatadoR32
In the U.S. choosing Urgent Care over ER for non-serious issues, even with insurance, is the difference between a $40 copay and a $500 copay
MatadoR32
2/ Even after that, with ER you still end up paying 20-30% of the total bill depending on how shit your insurance is.
cbale2000
Another fun thing is when the ER Dr's bill separately from the ER itself and don't take your insurance (and you don't find out till after).
demosthenes89
Happened to my mom. $2000 bill cause the doc working that rotation was out of network.
GriffinMann41
I often get incredibly debilitating sharp pain in my chest/gut, i'm talking 'Sit down and wonder if today is my last' kind, and with 1/
edalton454
Sounds like what I had. Turned out to be Gall Bladder. My sympathies to you.
GriffinMann41
my lack of the emergency funds and not having medical insurance means at this point I just deal with it because I'd rather be *dead* than 2/
GriffinMann41
stuck in crippling inescapable medical debt for the rest of however long my life would last. Welcome to the American dream, baby. 3/3
JoshJitsu
Sounds like acid reflux. Try omoprezole with magnesium.
demosthenes89
For Americans, urgent care is much cheaper and faster than the ER. I only go to the ER if I think I might be dying.
sourshampoo
Downvoting because your country is fuct
demosthenes89
Lol yes we certainly are.
cbale2000
To be fair, the cost difference is a good motivation for people to only use the medical care they need, rather than take up space in ER.
Gantzz321
the cost factor should be a good motivator to change the American system an stop being a 3rd world country already
cbale2000
MrHaveANiceDay
Hahah oh boy let me tell you about INSURANCE NETWORKS. Serious injury or illness? What if your insurance doesn't COVER the nearest hospital?
MrHaveANiceDay
So enjoy deciding between going to the nearest hospital and risking not having the bill covered or going further to one in-network!
McNuggetFarmer
Then this billboard should be advertising what insurance will be covered by going there to. It doesn't say this, so why the billboard?
MrHaveANiceDay
Because the healthcare industry in the USA is an amoral profit-seeking entity, not a care-giving one (pun intended)
MrHaveANiceDay
Why do I say 'going' like the ambulance isn't taking you? Well BOY HOWDY, because it's like $5000 for an ambulance ride
MrHaveANiceDay
But fear not! The USA is crippled by medical debt, higher health costs, and lower life expectancy as long as we're not 'SOCIALIST!'
MrHaveANiceDay
Sorry, and to clarify: going to in-network doesn't mean you don't pay. It just minimizes the huge burden of medical debt you'll take on.
OriginalSyn
Naw we need this in Canada too, fellow Canucks going to the ER for non emergencies is a real problem to our system.
Gantzz321
no it's not, you don't go right into a bed in ER you are prioritized which is the same thing
OriginalSyn
It's still a waste of resources, that person is using up space and at some point an ER doctors time when ti could be used elsewhere
OriginalSyn
It's still a waste of resources, that person is using up space and at some point an ER doctors time when ti could be used elsewhere
Gantzz321
so needing double the resources is not a waste in your opinion
OriginalSyn
Properly allocating resources with an educated population doesn't necessarily mean that you need more, might even result is in fewer.
CallMeMatrix
"I stubbed my toe" ICU
KingMercenary
Stubbed toe? Urgent care. No toe? Emergency care
BlackavarLion
I kid you now, I once kicked the wall in my sleep and tore off my toe nail.
CallMeMatrix
IOnlyCommentWithIrony
I stepped on a Lego
CrazedDrifter
"I stepped on a Lego" Morgue
Coopiness
Thats a bit drastic dont you think I mean, amputation is a given, but death by lego. Wow
LouisSlungpue
soepie7
"I have a cold"
zorkandbork
Quarantine.
loyboys215
Morgue
CallMeMatrix
no, you can come back from, but it takes a lot of healing, pain meds, and phyiscal therapy to learn how to walk again
BlackavarLion
You do if you contract a flesh eating virus.
AbsolutelyUndecided
"I got a paper cut and accidentally got lemon juice in it." RIP
CallMeMatrix
wouldn't that be more like burn unit
Jwulf148
Sounds like a level 2 trauma, get the trauma team on board!
Tralinlu
Most people probably wish ICU upon the person who built the wall there instead of two inches to the right.
ets57
- Jack Daniel
AlexisWalker
I mightve actually broken my toe because the wooden crate i was standing on couldnt support my weight. But i cant afford to get it checked.
forgetthisnoise
Tempted to post some of my husband shaming pictures here. He flops to the ground and rolls around screeching when he stubs his toes
pareidoliaperson
P
FlyrishHoney
Friend works ICU. Says stitches busted on a patient, intestines went into colostomy bag. EMERGENCY CARE.
CallMeMatrix
damn
lavendergirl
"I stubbed my pinky toe" RIP
Bendmydickcuminhersnatch
I got a paper cut, MRI
aboxofcheezits
Coroner is the word you are looking for.
ThermiteSnake
Can confirm. Blasted my pinky toe on Friday. I want to die with every step.
PinkyToeSlayerOfTableLegs
I beg to differ.
TheSomethingSomethingGenericReplyGuy
I stepped John Wick's pencil
CrazedDrifter
do they call you "lead foot" now?
PGTipsMonkeh
How dare you make me see this with my own two eyes.
TheSomethingSomethingGenericReplyGuy
paulguy119
Amusing. Unfortunately we're critical of people overreacting with medical care but not for people who don't seek it when they need it.
Trassation
It's only because I can't afford to pay for it.
ElectricRainbowBright
This right here. I waited to long and almost went septic from a kidney infection. I thought it was just a cold.
Solkanarmy
in the US, people have to ask themselves the question "can I afford to live?" that's way too sad to criticise those who don't seek help
AgentNovember
I’m very critical of people who don’t go to the hospital.
ItsWaluigitime
Nah Im critical of both
RNFlatus
I agree with you and I'm an ICU nurse.
battlepants
Perhaps "man up" was not the best advice...
MrSpookywasagoodboy2
Well if the emergency room wasn't the only place some people could get treatment, maybe this wouldn't be a thing, urgent care does not
MrSpookywasagoodboy2
accept uninsured or madicaid
shmekie
BECAUSE WHY SHOULD I PAY FER SOMEONE ELSE’S HEALTHCARE!?!? /s
valen00
I mean do they not understand insurance which is just that but also buying the CEO a boat?
Skelliton
Where I work we had a woman coming in demanding a medical certificate to stay at home from work because of mosquito bites...
HisBabes
Who can’t afford it when they need it so the issue becomes critical.
nanamonster
I've probably should have gone to the hospital more than once in mylife but felt like extreme pain wasn't serious enough to bother them.
VindictiveBathToaster
I have healthcare through work. I haven’t see any doctor for any reason since 1998.
DaveTheScientist
Damn dude, you really really need to see a doctor. A whole lot of shit can build up over 33 years; things that seem minor, but are actually
DaveTheScientist
indications of larger issues. Blood pressure, cholesterol, kidney/liver function, melanomas, nerve function, etc.
VindictiveBathToaster
*21 years
DoorCellar
That doesn't mean it's not true about 33 years and you're closer to it than you aren't. But seriously, get a once over.
DaveTheScientist
No idea why I had the number 1986 stuck in my head. Weird.
calichillionaire
Only people who use the ER as a general practitioner.
WeAreAllStoriesInTheEnd
My GP sends people to the ER for things like earaches because she is booked for months and my town has no walk in clinic.
paulguy119
An ER can't turn you away like a general medical practice can.
bChrispy
That's a shame, cause honestly so many people go to the ER with mundane minor medical problems...
Yesisaidthat
Knew a fire fighter who would routinely have to run out firetrucks to apply bandaids
Notme68
In America, if you're uninsured you have to go to the ER for an ear ache.
bChrispy
Really? That's so dumb to waste ER time with that. Also... Why would you go to a doctor for a simple ear ache to begin with?
BallsGoBounceBounceBounce
False, you can go to a CVS clinic, Kroger Minute Clinic, etc. But it’s like a $100. Beats a 2k ER bill
demodulated
That's what triage is for. They'll treat the patients with the greatest need first.
bChrispy
Yeah absolutely. But they still have to see the patients with minor ailments, wasting time and potentially delaying the help for someone els
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McFluffySundae
If people didn't abuse the ER then they wouldn't be so backed up that they have to neglect some patients. There's literally 15 other Dr. 1/2
McFluffySundae
offices and urgent care places within a 10 min drive of this ER. Even when you get taken back the staff is spread so thin they cant 2/3
ItsWaluigitime
Working in an ER, I honestly have a hard time believing they ignored you if you were truly having a seizure. No offense.
McFluffySundae
Didn't say I was having a seizure. Said I was having trouble breathing. Had to run and get someone to actually do anything and all they 1/2
McFluffySundae
did was hook up to monitoring machines which nobody monitored even when they started making noises, they were too busy in the next room 2/3
McFluffySundae
What ended up happening is we went somewhere else later after things stabilized a bit, found scarring in my lungs and that I'd had a tiny1/2
McFluffySundae
mini heart attack that night which went untreated until we went to the new doc which was an hour away from my home. 2/2
Goryofa
I just want to note this isn't an issue in Canada. I only recently discovered it was in the US, actually.
nclu
Well... let me introduce you to Mr. Munchausen and his saddest incarnation By Proxy.
toesarephalanges
If you’re referring to people not getting checked for health issues, I think that you would find it is more of an issue than you’d think 1/
toesarephalanges
Health literacy isn’t really an issue that can be solved by free healthcare unfortunately. Though not having to pay would definitely 2/
toesarephalanges
Help in the decision to go get assessed when/if they notice something a little off.. 3/3
Goryofa
Your last point is what I mean. I'm not saying it fixes it 100%, but the decision is less weighted, so maybe 40%.
Riouxen
Not sure where you live in Canada, but this is definitely a problem where I live. Overfull ER because people panic and go there instead of-
Riouxen
-the care clinic.
DaveTheScientist
I'm pretty sure he meant people not seeking medical treatment when they need it, isn't really an issue in Canada. We certainly do have
Goryofa
This is what I meant. Yes people still ignore symptoms, but the whole money being a reason not get stitches or something simple, not so much
Shellzie2010
I have a hard time believing that's not an issue. Cost isn't the only reason ppl avoid medical care - time, bravado, denial, fear, ignorance
DaveTheScientist
people overusing hospitals for minor issues.
TheMinisterOfCommonSense
Some people can't breathe after a beesting, just saying
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keyonne
If you use an Eli pen you’re supposed to go to the ER. My husband is allergic to nuts.
ProphetofEntropy
the adds are fucking dumb, i need antibiotic, not emergency, its for my plague, OMG EMERGENCY!!!
CMarshmallow
I can still breathe but I swell up far more than anyone has a right to. Ludicrous size.
noptic
Had a repeated issue with "harmless" inflammations that would get so bad within days that they had to cut them out. Still many Doctors ...
noptic
... in urgent care refused to do anything before the whole thing got messy because it was "harmless". Well they gave me the same ...
noptic
... antibiotics that had failed to do anything multiple times before.
Medic36
Then the complaint is anaphylaxis, not beesting.
JohnSmithJrTheThird
Some people can't breathe after fisting also
PopeTart
4 out of 5 urgent care doctors agree, Oral fisting is not recommended.
TheRussMartinShow
The 5th is just a freak.
randorandoreallythatnamestakentoo
EpiPen... Not trying to be a dick
Ronelyn
...followed by a trip to the ER, says the Epipen carrier, since there's always a dangerous chance your anaphylaxis has gotten worse.
keyonne
You’re supposed to go to the ER after using an epi pen. It doesn’t always solve the problem, just makes it so you don’t suffocate in the way
keyonne
there. My husband is allergic to nuts. If he accidentally eats some we always have to go to the ER for what’s essentially more epi pen but
keyonne
in an IV bag.
valen00
It's also oxygen and intubation if it doesn't work well enough
DorthLous
...Which is a temporary relief, yes, one of our best inventions. You still need to go to the hospital immediately.
ping0s
Not everyone knows if they’re allergic .
TheMinisterOfCommonSense
600 bucks each now in Canada, free at emergency... Just saying
GondwanaCraton
$600? That's an USA healthcare level of stupid!
randorandoreallythatnamestakentoo
Thats insane... I dont have any allegies so Im ignorant when it comes to that stuff
TheMinisterOfCommonSense
Might be a little less, but the expiry date is fairly short
OpenMouthHotKiss
Yeah its usually about a year so youre payomg $600 a year gor something you hopefully wont use, more of you do have to use it
edgareplekjekk
600 for a century old drug :(
boredoftheworld
I wasted a lot of time wondering “wtf is a beasting? What new perversion is that?”
siler7
It's where the space bar is just too much trouble.
upsidedownhead
Came here to say that. Googled it.... You don’t want to know what comes up
WaterUnderTheRocketAppliances
And how do I tell the difference between flu and plague as a non-doctor-person?
friendlesspharmacystudent
The flu will have muscle pain, sore throat and has a faster onset than most forms of plague if I remember correctly.
halfwindsor
You don’t have plague
VISMAL
Thank you DR. Halfwindsor ! I’ve been a bit tired recently and was worried.
Zahnradfee
Might be infectious mononucleosis. --- sincerly, the internet
VISMAL
Thanks for the nightmares internet !
SciencePetsComputers
The boubonic plague has a entry pointthat becomes noticeable,like a flea bite. Also causes necrosis,ruptured lymph nodes, and vomiting blood
SciencePetsComputers
Any of those last 3 symptoms is reason enough to go the E.R regardless, to state the obvious.
HisDudness
A large part of my diet is beets, so I'm honestly never really sure if I vomit blood.
Lulabel73
Plenty of people die if the flu.
HisBabes
Yep. Too many ppl either don’t take it seriously or can’t afford the doctor appointment as well as time lost from work.
Lulabel73
Well I live in Australia and even though it’s free people are still dying. It’s pretty bad at the moment.
HisBabes
Elderly, children & those that are immunocompromised are especially at risk. I know healthcare is free down there but that doesn’t stop -
Dragondraikk
Ask WebMD. Hint: It's cancer
BlueCat1
Start at urgent care. Upgrade if recommended/necessary.
BlueCat1
This is assuming you caught it early enough that you can’t tell if it’s flu or the plague.
CMarshmallow
How many fuckers in masks are following you around?
CMarshmallow
Also, are they old-timey long-nosed doctor masks or are they modern paper face masks?
GingerLaird
Depends. How much blood is in your tissue when you blow your nose?
PedestrianElectrobastard
Depends on how much coke I've had. Those ice cubes really scratch up the old mucus membranes.
ElynaerDeiros
They had us in the first half not gonna lie
Smallbrownrabbit
Well if you eat raw marmot in Mongolia.....
HisDudness
... Go on...
Smallbrownrabbit
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/may/06/mongolian-couple-die-of-bubonic-plague-after-eating-marmot
VISMAL
But... why? Did this happen to you? How was the Mongolian marmot tartar?
Smallbrownrabbit
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/may/06/mongolian-couple-die-of-bubonic-plague-after-eating-marmot
VISMAL
So ... not so good ? Did y’all ask for a manager?
HalstenTorqThorkelson
Well, the buboes on your neck, under your arms and around your groin are usually a giveaway.
PopeTart
See, asking imgur helped
MarvinSuggsMuppaphone
Though there are also pneumonic and septicemic plagues, which I think I’d also take to the ER when blood came from places it shouldn’t.
HalstenTorqThorkelson
That's a given. Blood from any orifice it shouldn't be coming from should take you straight to the ER.
MarvinSuggsMuppaphone
But it appears to be the major differentiation between the other plagues and the flu.