Work Tweets Dump

Jun 29, 2016 7:01 PM

Aumnile

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127927

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8500

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103

Okay great

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ignore this post I'm pretending to email the manager that our staff has passed out from heat stroke

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#1 Had a coworker suffering bad emotional distress. Uncomfortable to be around. Management wouldn't do anything, but I found a new job.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Okay, great.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Those are depressing. If people had better attitudes maybe they could possibly enjoy their jobs.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#3 I really do have a twin and his college friends didn't know for a while. They thought I was just a dick when I legit didn't know them.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

After reading the first one I think I need to look for a new job.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

all these people seem like the person referred to in #1

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ok, great you in the ass

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

OMG the fucking farewell card. It's like a text gallery of stock photos but with the value reduced to zero.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

DID #21 DELIVER?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

sty," said the Knave, "I didn't write it and they can't prove that I did; there's no name signed at the end." "You _mus (426/441)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yes I did

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Reading while on break

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This is why the service in NA is completely garbage.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I think about work more at home than I do at work

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#1 I guess I'm quitting. Sadly I also saw something like this about every group having an ugly person. My friends are all good looking. sigh

9 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 1

Working from home. Week 1: Shit's great yay! Week 30: I could use some fresh air. Week 60: Grocery shopping in pyjamas? Ah sure, fuck it...

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Ok, great OP

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My coworker had pictures of her kid all over her office. Replaced them all with me for April Fools. It was great, she left them up a while

9 years ago | Likes 22 Dislikes 0

#1 ... uh... well... really?... fuck.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

My dad used to always bring me to work to meet his coworkers, now I understand why they all seemed to hate me

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

#7 Yoghurt.... +1

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Meet #30

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Anyone else read this at work?

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

me

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

*hands up*

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Imgur has been posting job stories.Even if OPs hate it they say something positive. Seems like no one is every happy working in an office.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

I worked in a windowless office for 4 years for an oil company. Good money. Got laid off. Now I do field work for 30% less. Still happier.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

For real though fuck people who steal lunches

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

I left an unopened tub of butter in the fridge at work, and today it was opened and used.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah I did that to a colleague, but that was only because I had bought the same one in, we ended up just sharing his then sharing mine

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

That's fair. I write my name on mine, but it doesn't deter anyone.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I can't even imagine what type of person steals other people's food. This makes no sense to me whatsoever.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Narcissists that believe the world is for them. We're all a bit self centered, but some make a career out of it.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

#1. Got fired a few weeks ago and they wouldn't tell me why. Maybe this is why. Also, I have self-esteem issues.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I thought that they were required to give a reason?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

In MN they don't have to give a reason

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

they said "it's complicated" and there were "various reasons". 11 years. :)

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I believe if you pushed for an answer you could've gotten one, but really that is up to you and at that point it really wouldn't matter

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Agreed. Wouldn't have saved the job, may have given me closure, but all around it wouldn't change anything. Fuck 'em :)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

One of the things that makes me not want to get promoted is that I've have to get work email on my phone.

9 years ago | Likes 72 Dislikes 0

I have to get work email on my phone, but I don't have to reply out of hours. Solution? Just pretend to have it on my phone.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I was in this same position, so I ended up doing it and just setting it to sync like once every 7 hours.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I voluntarily put my work email on my phone. If I can do it outside of work that means less stress AT work. Which there's a lot of.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

When I'm home I'm home. I don't want to have to worry about work or having to be sober

9 years ago | Likes 34 Dislikes 2

You may have a problem.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 10

It's bad, the first thing I do when I wake up is check my work emails. Avoid it as long as possible.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Or wearing clothes.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Oh my shit, that sounds like the worst thing ever! It's this new 'work ethic' where everyone's expected to reply 24/7 on some CEO shit.

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

Constant notifications, or the possibility of an incoming email, that can never be good for your well-being.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

From an HR perspective, this is actually worse for productivity. Some companies even have policies against after-hours emails/texts at all

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

I hear that's a big thing in France, maybe elsewhere in Europe too.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That's good to hear!

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Lots of companies still haven't shifted from "frederick taylorism" but more well-informed/forward-thinking co's like Google realize that 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

instead of trying to demand productivity by micromanagement, its a better investment to invest in employees' mental health/not run them down

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

That twin idea is borderline genius.

9 years ago | Likes 356 Dislikes 1

i have a twin, and we went to different colleges. It works in reverse too. His friends thought he was a dick when I legit didn't know them.

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

Posting about it on Twitter...not so much

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I have a staff member who actually has a twin and she's super awkward. So no one talks to her. I think it would work

9 years ago | Likes 36 Dislikes 0

I had people at my job convinced I had a twin cause I go by my middle name but my badge has my first name on it. A friend there helped me.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Unless you have your coworkers added on facebook, in which case it turns to way too much effort to fake that.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

But that's bad for those who have a twin... DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME!

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I'd say it's too late...

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

My girlfriend has a twin sister who is also a teacher, they have a few great stories about confused students.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Do you happen to live in California by any chance? I went to a school that had the same scenario.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Nope.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Just Photoshop pictures of yourself together and display them on your desk like "this is Denise and I on our last birthday."

9 years ago | Likes 26 Dislikes 1

This is... I on our last birthday?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 2

They used correct English. "Denise and I" is correct compared to "Denise and me".

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Denise is a weird name for a boy

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 0

How about Denephew?

9 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 0

You. I like you

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Or Dennis

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 2

Hide and seek is exactly how I avoided being written up one time for coming in late. They just seemed to forget about it.

9 years ago | Likes 168 Dislikes 0

Smart smart

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I have a friend who said he was at work when he wasn't. When the guy said "I didn't see you here," he responded "I didn't see you either."

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Using this

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

My boss doesn't care if I'm late, as long as I make up the work, and she'd like to know if it's going to be more than 15m late.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I start hid from being fired for 4 days when I was working at Amazon. They'd call me up every morning to the office but I just didn't go.

9 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 0

God bless you sir.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Straight*, fuck it whatever y'all knew what I meant probably.

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

I still don't know what you mean

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

He straight hid from being fired, as in he hid from being fired by not replying to the calls up to the office.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You probably werent going to be fired until you ignored their request for 4 days lol

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

"Why won't he accept the promotion?" - Old boss probably

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Naw I was late like all the time plus I didn't show up for 2 days in a row

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Don't suppose you were working for the one by lichfield in UK were you, wouldn't blame you for doing that if you were

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Litchfield in Arizona

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Come in late in herrendous rush and if someone tries to ask, start with some toilet shit story, stop, run ro toilet while yelling "must go"

9 years ago | Likes 58 Dislikes 0

I guarantee, no-one will ask or bother you later. At worst they'll ask "you ok?" and you can say "yeah, bad sushi yesterday I guess"

9 years ago | Likes 46 Dislikes 0

If that doesn't work, throw a tampon on them and yell "Smoke bomb!" And hide behind a chair. Works all the time.

9 years ago | Likes 33 Dislikes 0

As a male....?

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Even more effective as a male. They would be more stunned by that.

9 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 0

Pocket sand is also a very effective countermeasure

9 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

Working third shift is also a great way to not have any coworkers. It's lonely. :(

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

but it's coarse and it gets everywhere

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Pocket sand can get you into HR trouble as you can harm someone's eyes. Not recommended!

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0