SarahHamiltonIII
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Feb 23, 2017 8:17 AM
SarahHamiltonIII
121306
2107
68
iCommentWithMontyPythonQuotes
I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, but I'm afraid my tampon has become rather sillier recently.
ProvoloneTone
Blood spottin
lopsidemaniac
comehomefransbrauder
Kegels, my friends. Pulls it right back in.
andiwaslikebiiiitch
the fucking worst...
BklynPunisher
Yes for those hot summer days when your balls sick to your legs. Or powder them bad boys regularly.
abeaverisjustakindofrodentgetoveritalready
Or the attempted ladylike penguin-waddle of CRAPNOTFARENOUGHBACKTOTHELOOIGOOOO!!!
GiveMeAllThePizza
And the same when you can feel it leaking. Ugh.
GoCatss
I'm lost
VernonLamb
I used to clean bathrooms at a mall. Why do women put their used pads on the wall?
JennyHill
What?? Who does that?? I feel for you - that's not okay.
LilMissPinkBubblegumUnicorn
My friend asked me once about this, I told him "paper dick malfunction".
punkasaurus
When you sneeze and it tries to escape.
Octobutt
my first time ever experience using a tampon made me waddle the whole day
CertifiedPreOwnedButtPlug
Same... There was also crying
OliverClothesoff70
Me too. I'm a guy, though.
candysaur
Mine made me faint. Not fun.
Octobutt
didn't help it was the day my SO brought me to meet his family for the first time. Ever.
YippinYak
Haha yes can relate +1 *quickly tucks dick away*
squelcheswetly
I recommend putting a penis in there. Move vigorously a few times a day for a few days. /sagenod
sarahlyzzibeth
My college roomie didn't know you're supposed to remove the applicator.
SarahHamiltonIII
AManWhoWasntThere
Monty Python! Always upvote Monty Python!
TerminalInterface
trying to unstick my balls from my leg
futureman3000
Here's my method:
. Prevention is the best defense.
tarataqa
I never knew I needed these. *googles twerkgifs*
tarataqa
http://www.thenug.com/sites/default/pub/112713/thenug-WhDyMpL2vH.gif
eco79
yeah, brother, the pain is real
SemperFiZero
That's how you shake off the dry tp stuck to your ass grooves.
TerminalInterface
or when I run out of TP, and coffee filters.
ImBrutallyHonest
I laughed. +1
SarahHamiltonIII
I thought it was more like this? Then again, I don't have danglers
BklynPunisher
Nah that's for after you've freed them, it's like the victory dance.
OneHandedClapper
It's a little closer to this op
XyoLikesDinosaurs
Can confirm, I do exactly that.
guywithwifi
Every man has his own style. I personally do it like this
v.
midnightman163
BklynPunisher
That's for extreme cases of stuck balls.
weeklypooper
or taking a dry one out. ow
swinglinered
add water?
weeklypooper
If only it were that easy
auredu
I'll learn how to squeeze this thing back inside and it's my life goal now
Duder87
Sorry to have kept you waiting, my walk has gotten rather silly lately.
sabrielliraelabhorsens
100% accurate
OnePingOnly
Ministry of Silly Walks
justdoinmyshups
greyhoundbones
when the string is stuck in your bum crack
Denamic
That looks a lot like the testicle stuck to leg walk
WateryTartan
Gurl thingz
GeologyCat
worse if you don't realise it and try to sit down... the first year was rough
IspeakFrench
When I was 9 I was so jealous of my sister having her period, I stole some of her tampons and used them. Yeah...ouch
GeologyCat
The things we do when we are young...
DrTeethandtheElectricMayhem
That's much too long to keep a tampon in.
datfandomdoe
DrTeethandtheElectricMayhem
annoyedOnion
DrTeethandtheElectricMayhem
Zap117
A friend had to go to the gyno cuz her snatch smelled like death . She had forgotten a tampon in there for a month
DrTeethandtheElectricMayhem
Nuuuuuuuu!!
MisterDictionary
Hello, toxic shock!
ChucklePuss
Me too. No one taught me and I didn't read the directions. I just left it all in there, applicator and all, when I went on a swimming trip.
riggityriggitywrekt
Did the same thing first time but mine was for a P.E. class
RickyBobbyShakenBake
Oh, honey... that sounds rough!
ladyiota
I did the same thing. My mom still laughs at me 30 years later.
GeologyCat
christ that sounds uncomfortable! I had a friend in the next stall coaching me, at least.
SteveTypeRs
Pretty sure they come with directions...
GeologyCat
I was given one out of the box by my friend so i could go surfing. No box handy at the time.
ChucklePuss
Yep, but my young idiot self didn't think to read them. Instead, I got lip-pinched on a bicycle. I learned very soon after that though.
GeologyCat
ow... I feel so much sympathy for your younger self
ASmellofWineandCheapPerfume
That made me chuckle, good one.
Genstan
OMG PLEASW EXPLAIN THIS THING TO ME
abeaverisjustakindofrodentgetoveritalready
Foreign object inserted incorrectly into female genitalia precipitates difficulty in achieving standard perambulatory pattern.
Genstan
Damn bruh ty I'm feeling smarter rn
abeaverisjustakindofrodentgetoveritalready
Much obliged.
AManWhoWasntThere
chicknorris
Two words ladies: Diva Cup. Seriously the best thing ever!
raraluiz
Yes yes yes! Love mine!
SexualPeanut
Hard pass.
Victorasaurus
I've had one for 3 years now and I'm never going back. More than worth it
chicagochick
I used Instead a couple of years ago...And pulling it out was a messy messs!
chicknorris
It's not that bad, dump it and wash your hands after
chicagochick
But at work? Public stalls...Walking out with murder hands.. idk
chicknorris
You won't have murder hands, use the tips of your fingers and toilet paper, you can clean your hands with tp a bit before washing your hands
NotSingleCatLady
My sister loves hers but I tried it and hated it. It's all personal choice really
BklynPunisher
You tried hers and hated it? Well there's your problem, get your own and maybe you will like it better.
pepperronii
Is it good for people who exercise?
chicknorris
I would say yes. I always wear a liner though for any minor leaks.
BklynPunisher
I seriously wonder what percentage of women would be ok with those?
areola51
to the top with you. seriously a life changer.
usuallyjustkidding
Two words: fuck off
chicknorris
Did I offend you Muffin?
AvengeTheCompanionCube
Two words: I'm not good at counting.
MyDarlingFeet
Tried it for a few months but it was terribly awkward to sit down and have a suction sound from nowhere. It also hit against my wall 2 long
chicknorris
You didn't have it in properly then, I've never heard of a suction sound before. It took a while for me to perfect the use of it I'll admit.
MyDarlingFeet
It was trial and error (only has the sucking sound once) and then a return to pads after having it in, in such a way that it hurt for weeks
NoCuretoInsanity
I'd like to try, but I'm worried about messes. I've never been able to do tampons, so have been on pads my entire life.
areola51
the trick is to hover and theres a certain way to pop that sucker out to make it all go in the potty.
cottoncandybingo
Diva cup can last an entire day, I only empty it when I'm at home.
joooookie
I refuse to use tampons too but I've never had problems with pads. I don't get the deal with all the hate for them?
CorrectlyOperatedVagina
Personally, I do a ton of dance (mainly ballet) and working out...way to much risk of "movement" and leakage if using pads!
chicknorris
You've gotta get comfortable with your vagina, it is messier but you don't have to change it as often, I like it
UptownFunkgotmeLockedOutOfHeavenwitha24kMagicGrenade
There's a learning curve but it does get better. And if you have heavier periods then be sure to change every 6 hours instead of 12.
UptownFunkgotmeLockedOutOfHeavenwitha24kMagicGrenade
It's still better than a pad in my experience.
DecorativeCacti
You're worried about messes but you're using pads? I haven't used pads in forever, but unless they've improved they can be pretty messy.
fricklenani
The only shitty thing about pads are the bloody pubes/vagina, and the waterfall in the morning when you first stand up. I use a diva cup now
Totsmacgee
I only used pads after I gave birth. They make my lady bits swell up and hurt terribly.
DecorativeCacti
I still have nightmares of using a "night" pad and waking up with my thighs covered in blood or shifting and sticking to my public hair.
bluetractor
How do they work? What happens if you have to..empty it in a public restroom? I want to try them but i'm apprehensive!
chicknorris
Google how they work. As for public bathrooms dump it in the toilet and clean with toilet paper if you need but don't leave paper on it.
MyDarlingFeet
Pretty much what chicknorris said.
cinemeasctha
Or when you cough and the tampon moves.
Chrisbronk
What?
nombredeusario
Or sneeze
cinemeasctha
Actually that's worst +1
BananaShip
if you sneeze hard enough, would you get a tampon bullet?
ZashchishchayushchiysyaOsushchestvitelLzhesvidetelstva
It's our family's version of paintball
Kensidian
Oh...oh god...where's the mental eye bleach
TheLordFarquad
raptorsoldier
Or trying to adjust your balls in public
Nearlyburly
Sooo, when you see guys doing that, you're thinking.....
tootscootinboogie
Or poop
chicagochick
I thought it was an irrational fear ..That id push to poop and my tampon would pop out!
lovememaddly
I just push it out when I have to poop. It's hard though-lots of kegels
chicagochick
:O #pelvicfloorgoals!
vaktmastare
Yes! I just take it out before pooping
weeklypooper
THIS IS THE WORST AND HAPPENED TO ME THIS MORNING UGG
spacecatts
I change mine every time I poop personally
tootscootinboogie
Sometimes I'll have the misfortune of a fresh tampon and then 15 min later I need to poop. I usually do what you do though.
spacecatts
SERIOUSLY and as someone with IBS...ugh
tootscootinboogie
Oh no, that's terrible!
HadMeSomeChickens
Is this a real problem?
shootsewvintage
Yup.
bluetractor
I've been using them for years and that has never happened to me
chestdesk
Yes it is
delilahviolet
Yes
Mintendo64
Yes
GiveMeAllThePizza
One of the worst.
spacecatts
Oh yes
CapitalPea
It is
ladyiota
Yes
IAmTheCutestOfBorg
Especially after having kids. I've sneezed and shot one out. With a clot chaser.
youngmountaingoat
Wh...but.....h.....er..... Nah, I got nothing.
therealshaun
cinemeasctha
I love this comment.
SagaStrangeness
JazzyDong
I'm so glad I have a penis.
Cerinna
Tampons are so much a problem for me in fact that I have to stick to pads. And please no one suggest that damn moon cup thing to me. Ew.
Electriccarsbestcars
I had a wicked heavy flow. Diva cups are life. Plus pissing on the string is probably the grossest thing on earth
Cerinna
Well with the pads I can just toss 'em in the bin. I've always had a heavy flow too, a little less so now that I'm on birth control.