serakaida
308385
8351
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Apr 4, 2017 10:49 AM
serakaida
308385
8351
87
LordOfTheGingers
Well humans don't migrate...
WilyLlamaTrio
@lifeofablondie
CatsAgainstHumanity
Baetheon
I knew this post would end with Diogenes from the moment someone defined coconut as a mammal.
SpelligMitsake
MOANA
SleepyBrains
Acoconut would, by the same definition, consider all mammals fellow coconuts
BewilderedBeaver
Except people. People are just nuts.
Yolodog66642069
Thank you for this gross over simplification
TheSecretZcr38or
Nipples
mikeatike
Ancient Greek trolling.
Silmariella
The best kind of trolling.
singingturtles113
The what?!
billdozer86
They had a chance to break into the song from Moana and they blew it. Fucking blew it.
BeeDaTo
Exactly. You've messed up, OP. Glad I'm not the only one who felt this way @billdozer86
billdozer86
I'm a 30 year old man that doesn't like musicals or Disney and I fucking love Moana. So good. Chokes me up.
kayxdosenfahrer
What about dolphins?
Flyndaran
They produce milk and have a few tiny whiskers.
cupcake13
What about them?
HamsterHuey
They have fur prebirth, are warm blooded, and breathe with lungs not gills. Some dolphins have a little fur on their head.
HowCurious
sippycup101
"You know what this joke needs? Current events and politics."
HowCurious
ItsCarverTime
I shit you not, I'm in my BIO465 lecture right now, its a class on Evolution. Seriously contemplating intersecting about the coconut
WookieWookieWookie
I wouldn't, because your teacher will point out that coconuts don't produce milk or grow hair. This is a stupid argument based on people
WookieWookieWookie
Incorrectly using the words hair and milk.
Idownvotefornosauce
Haha Diogenes that silly guy. I was there for that.
PurpleAppleBag
Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?!
Lawodis
Funny, but mammal falls under vertebrates (among other things) and a coconut definitely doesn't have a spine (among other things)
iamlikelytoforgetthis
Consider the lily!
SpaceSpeed
Well, the birds, then. Any birds. Well, have they got jobs?
IOwnTheSpire
So the birds are scrounging?
GTPTB
Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?
QueenCousland
A swallow could grip one by its husk.
Meandme2
It's not a question of where he grips it, It's a simple matter of weight - ratios
Ledan
Logical fallacy, property thingy. Classic example: "All birds have 2 legs. Socrates has 2 legs. Therefore Socrates is a bird" Doesn't follow
Ledan
And a mammal is an animal that, amongst other things, gives live birth and feeds its offspring with milk. Coconut is the product of a plant
TheFlanos
I was looking for this
xmaneds
taking issue with morphology-based phylogeny: // puts on geneticist hat: "CLADISTS RULE !!"
jnet1985
Consider the coconut, and while you do that, I'm gonna rummage through your stuff.
ClosedForANationalHoliday
CONSIDER ITS TREE
pangyre
Coconuts don’t make milk. They make water and endosperm. Coconut milk has to be extracted from the latter. Also it is not milk.
mzmzpants
does this mean coconuts R male? I mean, sperm, right?
pangyre
And coir isn’t hair.
ThisIsFrigglish
"Would-be smartasses will always require you to include as many specifics as possible to keep them from pretending they don't understand."
DonnaNobleInTheLibrary
Well, a group recently suggested a new definition of "planet". Problem is, their definition would add over 100 new tiny planets just here.
Mimelife
This reminds me of coding for the imaginary user. As a programmer, you assume that the user is so dumb or so smart, they'll break the code.
Shargan8
I wish to become a programmer... but life happens... how is that going for you?
Mimelife
(sorry for the really late reply) its going well, it's certainly not easy everyday, but I'm glad I stuck with it.
the12thletter
This is useful though. You always need to consider edge cases, and can never assume the general public will "know what you mean".
DoctorTheta
You can't make anything foolproof, because they'll always be better fools
fairybug
That is my absolute least favorite form of humor. It's funny every once in a while, but an excess of it is just insulting.
NatetheHumanPopsicle
Which form? The chicken joke? The ambiguity joke? Is your comment it's own play on the ambiguity? Idk ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
AyAyRonn
I imagine that's how my mom feels when my dad's side of the family is together. Actually, that's exactly how she feels. She's verbalized it.
fairybug
If she feels the same way I do, perhaps it's for the same reason: because, eventually, it comes across as mocking her intelligence.
fairybug
Also: killer username. Now tell your dad's family to go to Oshaghennessy's office for bad jokes!
boevis
Contemplate your navel orange.
PotatOSLament
Consider the platypus.
AngryFennec
I didn't even know oranges had navels...
alexburgers
Some do.
CthulhusGreasyBallsack
some are fuzzy navels
thelovechildofhitlerandstalin
My belt leaves a rust spot near my navel
QuazMasta
So you have an orange navel. Contemplate that.
thelovechildofhitlerandstalin
I am Donald Trump
InfOracle
Contemplate the Rust Belt.
ImgurCouncilOfLlamas
It used to be the steel belt.
shimmernshine
Where'd you get the coconut?
QuazMasta
We found it.
shimmernshine
Found it? In Mercia? But coconuts are tropical!
QuazMasta
The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or plover may seek warmer climes in winter yet they are not strangers to our land
shimmernshine
Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? [tbh my favorite line in the entire film]
QuazMasta
Not at all. It could be carried. [i had to look up the house martin/plover earlier cuz i only remembered swallows]
FuzzyMedic
"Consider the lily ..." "He's having a go at the flowers, now!"
Meandme2
Oh, give the flowers a chance.
A1710monstr42
A1710monstr42
seije
THE JUDEAN PEOPLES' FRONT!
A1710monstr42
A1710monstr42
Assklowne
Because coconut trees are autotrophs not heterotrophs and also cell walls
idiotn00b
ur a autotroph
nero4ty2
mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell
AnAwkwardlyLongKissingSceneInDancesWithWolves
But this is talking about morphology based phylogeny. Morphology = the way it looks.
AxelYamanaka
But that's not what the simplification said.
Assklowne
There's also the chloroplasts and the fact that coconuts don't have mammary glands so it's not really milk or hair for that matter
Assklowne
And, lest I forget, you can't be a mammal without first bring part of the animal kingdom
[deleted]
[deleted]
cogs
Aw, geez. It's a jesting little poke. Damn, you guys are touchy. Who pissed in your cornflakes?
Assklowne
What did it say?
capitainechips
Thank you
Millillion
Correct, but this was, as is noted, a comment on morphology-based phylogeny, which can run into similar issues, though this is obviously 1/?
Millillion
a greatly exaggerated and silly example. 2/2
Flyndaran
Some animals have symbiotic photosynthesizers and go months without eating effectively being autotrophs. Clarity is often needed.
Assklowne
Is this for real? Like what animals?
Flyndaran
One cute video by Scishow about some https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AcX2n1rC4W4
Assklowne
Isn't nature neat
kmr5709
This is stupid, coconuts don't have mammary glands. Hair and milk does not characterize something as a mammal.
crazydiamondmlp
That's what facetious means.
fluhatinrapper
I have nipples greg, can you milk me?
WookieWookieWookie
Not to mention coconuts don't make hair or milk. Those are just misuses of those terms because they resemble those things.
ImmenseOreChasm
I have nipples Greg. Could you milk me?
Flyndaran
Yes they do, but most people know the difference between literal milk and hair, and figurative forms.
10tacles
Coconuts have mammary glands?
Flyndaran
No, but coconut juice is usually called milk.
10tacles
The post before you said "This is stupid, coconuts don't have mammary glands" and you replied "Yes they do" it was amusing to imagine a
10tacles
coconut with tits
Flyndaran
True, nuts with tits just sounds weird all around.