Story of a guy who was hurt on the job

October 10th, 2012

The morning of my accident I remember looking at the three trees that needed to be climbed and thinking it was a big job for the small crew we had. The boss decided that we would have three guys climb and two on the ground. Normally I would have climbed the smallest of the three trees (as I was the least experienced climber on the crew) but we had recently hired a new guy who had more experience working in another province but who hadn't climbed for us yet. My boss asked me if I would mind if the new guy climbed the small tree (which was a 65ish foot tall Douglas Fir) so we could see what he was capable of, and I didn't mind at all. I loved working on the ground just as much as I loved climbing.

The new guy did a great job. He did things a little different than I did, but we could all tell that he was good at his job. Things were pretty hectic because we had more stuff to clean up and feed into the wood chipper than we were capable of doing, but me and the other ground guy did our best to keep up.

After taking all the limbs off the small tree, the new guy dropped an xmas tree sized top and then would start firing down 3-4 foot chunks of the trunk of the tree that could be cut into firewood. I was bent over picking up my chainsaw so I could process the top that had come down when I heard the new guy yell. By the time I heard him, it was too late, and one of the 3-4 foot pieces landed flat across my lower back.

It was a freak accident. It had apparently bounced off another tree and flown across the yard to where I was, so it was just extremely unlucky for everyone. I remember the whole incident. It was strangely calm and serene. I remember looking at the dew on the grass and thinking of how beautiful it looked from my awkward perspective.

It didn't take the guys long to get down from the trees they were in and come check on me. Two of them had tears in their eyes which was the first indication to me that something was probably pretty bad. One of the other climbers was (and still is) a very good friend of mine so I asked him to light me a cigarette and then to please call my ex-girlfriend and tell her to tell my then three-year-old son that I love him.

I was taken by ambulance to the hospital, although I remember asking the paramedics if they could please just take me home and put me in my bed. I was sure I would be okay. Turns out I was in shock and I'm very relieved that the paramedics were as good as they were. They really got the ball rolling as far as saving my life goes. They laughed off my silly request and made jokes with me and kept things light while still maintaining professionalism and making sure that I wasn't in too much pain on the way to the hospital.

The first hospital I went to wasn't capable of handling an injury like mine because it's a small hospital in our small town. They stabilized me and I vaguely remember seeing some of my family members and my ex-girlfriend crying over me. My aunt recently told me that it was a bizarre scene because I was so messed up on morphine and I was smiling reassuring everyone else while they panicked.

My injuries turned out to be pretty severe. I had spiral fractured vertebrae L2, L3, L4, L5, and S1, as well as broken a bunch of the ribs on my left side. Two of the ribs had gone in one side of my lung and out the other so I was essentially drowning in my own blood at one point. There were also some less significant breaks in my back as well. All in all, I had broken 20 bones in about half a second.

It was a foggy morning so I couldn't be air-lifted to the nearest major hospital in my province, so instead I was taken in another ambulance to a bigger hospital about 250 kilometers away. I don't remember that ambulance ride because I was unconscious through most of it. My friend who was with me when I was hurt had told his GF what happened and she had posted it on Facebook (which I didn't mind) so by the time I got to the second hospital there were more family and friends there waiting for me. I don't remember too much of my time there. It was only a few hours. I wasn't allowed any food or water, but my nurse would wet a small sponge and let me put it in my mouth. My cousin has since told me that at one point I said to her "Shannon, you love me, right?" and when she said yes, I apparently said "Then I need you to spit in my mouth." Don't judge me! It had been hours and hours by this point with no food or water and lots of pain meds and my mouth was dry! Of course she just laughed at my request and we still joke about it to this day.

Finally at about 2:00 the following morning they were able to get a helicopter in to fly me to a third hospital where I would receive surgery (11.5 hours!) to try to put my spine back together and where I would stay for about 3-4 weeks.

Hospital time

I don't remember much of the first couple weeks after my surgery. I think I was unconscious for most of it. I wasn't allowed solid food and was fed through an IV for eleven days. I went from 170 lbs to about 138 lbs in that time and was skinnier than I have ever been in my life. Despite the weight loss and the pain and being hungry all the time, I enjoyed my time in the hospital. Morphine is a hell of a drug! I vaguely remember being very entertained by the World Series at one point, but I've never been a big baseball fan. I mean, if you can watch baseball on TV and find it interesting, you must be high, right?

The doctor who did my surgery explained to me that I was very lucky as my spinal cord hadn't been severed, but it had been stretched quite badly. He wasn't sure how this would affect me because all spinal injuries are different and this wasn't something that he sees very often, if at all.

Finally after three weeks in the third hospital I was transferred to a spinal rehabilitation clinic that specialized in cases like mine. The clinic had a physiotherapist who would come and get me every day and we would do exercises together. We did little things like I would lay on my stomach and try to bend my legs at the knee. My right leg was no problem and as far as I could tell my left leg was fine too, until my physio asked me to watch my left leg as I "moved" it. I turned my head and watched as I tried and tried and tried to bend my left leg at the knee, but it wouldn't move. I had been convinced that I was doing it, but apparently I had no movement in that leg at all. I guess it's not uncommon. Similar to when someone loses a limb and they get a "phantom itch" or a burning sensation in a limb that isn't there anymore.

Having a young son at home, I was determined to get back on my feet, so when I was offered a motorized scooter, I said no. As fun as that could have been, I didn't think it would motivate me to get better. I hit the parallel bars every chance I got and worked hard to try to move my left leg.

Eventually I was offered the opportunity to purchase some custom made forearm crutches. They were awesome. They had shocks and reflectors and padded arm bands. Seriously cool shit. I loved them because I was able to be a little mobile again. It was a really big deal to be able to be a little independent, although I still wasn't allowed out of the hospital on my own.

Back on my feet

Through all of this, I was working with a government appointed case worker who was in charge of working out how much money I would be allotted each month since I wouldn't be able to go back to work for a long time, if ever. I was quite foolish and didn't hire a lawyer and I signed documents that really limited what I was able to do and what kind of legal action I was allowed to take. It was one of the dumbest things I've ever done, and I wish I could take it back now, but I can't. All I can say is that I think it was unfair to allow someone who is on so much prescribed pain medication to sign legal documents. The last two and a half years have been a financial nightmare because of the decisions I made during this time.

Despite all that, I was absolutely blown away by the support I received from friends and family. I had grown up in a tight knit punk rock scene in my fairly small town of 50,000 or so people. Everyone in the scene knew everyone else. Thanks to some seriously special people, there were some benefit shows put on in my name (I believe there were three) which included silent auctions. People donated so many different things and bands came from all over to play for free to help me out. It was one of the nicest feelings I'd ever had, at that first show, to be able to get up on the stage on my crutches and look out at a hundred or more people who were there because they loved me and they wanted to help and to say thank you. I'll never be able to thank them enough.

Being a dirtbag.

I don't hear this one very often anymore, but I used to hear it all the time. People would assume that since I was hurt on the job I would somehow be given a big chunk of cash and I'd be rich for the rest of my life. Not the case. I make enough money each month to pay my rent and to eat, but I've also incurred a ton of debt since I was hurt. It's an awful feeling to have to borrow money or do unsavoury things to get a few bucks. Selling personal belongings, begging, and other things that have been done have made me feel like a bad person, but its been necessary in order to get me to where I am now.

Yup.

Before my accident I had a ton of hobbies. I played hockey, skated, hiked, fished, climbed, and I loved going out for drinks with my friends. Playing catch with the football or playing drunken soccer. Swimming at the lake. Those were the days. The one constant throughout all those activities though, was booze. I drank a lot. Like, a LOT. I was a high functioning alcoholic, in fact. And boozy times often led to cocaine just to get me so I wasn't spinning. (I want to be clear here that although I definitely had a problem, I have never in my sons life been high or drunk around him. I never even so much as smoked a cigarette when he would come stay with me for the weekend. I may have been a dirtbag, but I never wanted my son to grow up thinking that was acceptable, so I didn't do it when he was around. End of story.)

Anyway, because of a my accident and the painkillers that I was on, I couldn't drink. I felt like I had kicked the drinking problem, but by the time January rolled around and I was out of the hospital and away from the watchful eye of all the wonderful doctors and nurses, I had kicked the pills instead, and I was back on the booze. I drank like crazy for awhile, and I wasn't able to take my son for overnight visits (because I couldn't keep up with a three year old in my condition anyway, which just made me want to drink more).

It was one of the worst times of my life. I was so miserable. Despite the drinking, I was working hard to get back on my feet again (literally) and one day I had a thought: I've spent so much of my life doing all the wrong things to my body, what would happen if I tried for just one month to do the right things for my body. I bet I'd be able to get around easier.

Sure enough, once I stopped drinking and I wasn't constantly either drunk or hungover, I started feeling better. I could form cohesive thoughts and physically, I was better than I had been since my accident. Before long, I bought myself a cane at a second hand store and I was able to ditch my crutches and start walking with that instead. Not long after that, I was allowed to start having overnight visits with my boy again. And shortly after that, I applied to a local college to see if I could upgrade my high school in order to find a new job.

It was great to see the results that I got in school. To know that I still had a pretty good head on my shoulders. And I've found new things to love about life. I can't play hockey anymore, but I know the game inside and out better than most because that's how I can still be involved. By learning about every little detail and knowing everything I can know about all the players.

I read books again! I had stopped reading, aside from reading to my son, but I'm back at it and it feels great. I had almost forgotten how much I love a good book.

My hobbies aren't what they used to be, but they're still hobbies and they keep me busy.

Back to school... Back to school...

The government agency that's in charge of people who have been injured on the job in my province definitely came through in one way: They paid for me to go to school. After upgrading my high school, I decided that I would like to work in a hospital, so I looked into doing a HealthCare Office Assistant course. My plan was to get everything I could out of it and then look into a job in medical transcription so I could work from home, but I found that I really enjoyed other aspects of the course. I spent 10 months in school learning and meeting amazing new people (mostly other adults, but some people who were just out of high school as well) and it was a great environment. My sobriety and my education really made me value my life again. I had never felt better!

I finished school in January of 2015 and in March I was hired at the very same small hospital that I was initially taken to. It's been amazing! I feel so good each and every day.

This accident has put my whole life into perspective. Things have changed for me in more ways than I ever could have imagined, but it's all for the better. My son is now two and a half weeks shy of his sixth birthday and he's my best friend in the whole world.

My relationship with his mom and her common-law husband is amazing. They're two of my very close friends now, and I'm extremely happy to be a part of their other young sons life (he is two months shy of his second birthday and he's a wonderful, beautiful boy too).

My high school sweetheart had been living in India at the time of my accident but she flew out here when she heard I was injured and she just never left. We've been living together for two and a half years now and she really helps me to keep things in perspective. She's wonderful! She keeps me on my toes and keeps me from getting too down on myself. I am a very lucky man.

And finally, about eight weeks ago, I ditched my cane. I can walk! It's not easy and there is a lot of permanent nerve pain, but I can do it. I still use my cane most of the time for the sake of safety, and I probably always will, but I can walk which is a huge accomplishment.

I dunno why I decided to post this. I guess its good for me to write it all down finally and to be able to see the progress I've made. I know everyones experiences are different, but I just want to say that there can be good things taken from bad situations. It's all in how you choose to deal with things.

I don't have any hard feelings towards the guy who dropped the log. He's a nice guy and he has called me on the anniversary of the accident both years since it happened. I think he's taken it harder than I have.

I know that tons of people have been through way worse things than this and probably come out ahead of where I am, but I just want you guys to all know that I changed my life with hard work and perseverance and I know any of you could too. I've gone from being depressed and drunk to happy and sober and all it took was a broken spine!

tl;dr - Guy gets crushed by a tree, helps him connect with friends, beats alcoholism, life becomes awesome.

June 2nd Edit: I just want to thank everyone for all their support. You guys are amazing. I posted this with the intention of just finally being able to see my story in writing and hopefully finding other people out there who have been in a similar situation, and I succeeded in that and then some. The support from the Imgur community has made the last couple days really easy for me mentally, which is really nice. I've been trying to respond to each and every comment and message but it's tough to keep up! But I just wanted to let you guys know that today I went and spoke to a woman at Legal Aid in my town and she pointed me in the direction of a government funded program that is set up to help people in my scenario navigate through the workers comp stuff. I really appreciate all the messages and the love, guys. Thanks again!

Pigpen