CargitoErgoSum
160124
2770
90
May 1, 2017 9:34 PM
CargitoErgoSum
160124
2770
90
anitabieror6
maybe she loaded yours with extra cheese. I do that for my husband cuz he loves cheese but I only like a thin layer. they look same til cut
BabyYodasChickenTendies
My gf always gives me the food that looks grosser even though it's all the same lol
nottitanium
Both would me mine. I don't have a wife (or husband). I'm so alone. Food is all I have lol
zac677
She dropped one on the floor. Eat it anyways.
StormBurnX
The first one she cooked didn't quite come out right, so she made sure the second one she cooked was just perfect, and for you.
labratlet
If she made it that seems fair. Also you get grilled cheese without the work, it's a win/win situation.
ItzGent
is this the batman with the tits?
NoSleepTilBrooklyn
I use more butter in the pan and I'm extra sure that the cheese reaches all the corners of the bread for mine. For my husband's? Eh.
nekrow
TooLegit2Quit
IT'S POISON!! ..I TELL YA !!!
AntiEvil007
Full of laxatives, shouldn't have taken her food!
Tooexforbee
This is one of my favourite movies. Simply because it's so shit that it's good.
immajinx
I give my SO the 'prettier' one. Or if we are low on meat or cheese, I go without. I doubt he notices :)
lokikismit
What? I'm not homicidal...what a second...
AlanWyckoff
She's been watching breaking back and making ricin to put in your sandwich!
ieatCheezIts
Fuck, I want grilled cheese now
stupendiferous
Got the Viagra stick in his throat and now his neck is stiff
RoderickAndara
Only one had the poison in it.
arok
When I cook grilled cheeses, one is better and it belongs to me.
ojp1977
Doesn't look like Adam West, Michael Keaton nor Bale... must be a fan made film
RosieCat
I do this with my husband, the one that's for him has more love. Made/ prepared for him. Mine gets slapped on the plate because meh for mine
pickacalah
One time my history teacher stepped out of class and left us with his wife (art teacher at the same school) and she was slicing some cheese
pickacalah
And eating it piece by piece. One dropped on the floor and when my history teacher came back she gave that one to him and none of us said
pickacalah
Anything because she was a crazy bitch
ClearBlue
The 96% of women who are crazy give all the others a bad name.
CargitoErgoSum
xD
RELAVANTGIFMAKER
rawr
LurkMasterP
IStillGiveOutDickPics
They're not identical. she only put poison in one.
yakusokuN8
What if she put the poison in BOTH sandwiches, but spent the last few years developing an immunity to poison?
jrntn
Then she would probably not care which one you ate.
Bigcurly2000
I am 100% with your wife on this one. Even if they ARE identical...It just matters.
shredder134
agreed. i could make two identical plates of food and the one on the left is mine.
Bigcurly2000
For me I think it's about subconsciously taking slightly more care over making the other person's even if the end result is the same
whatthepoint
give her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe she dropped yours and didn't want to eat it.
mostlikelytoquoteamovie
Or the other side of hers is slightly burnt
CargitoErgoSum
nope! poison!
Daloth
Using poison Ivy as the villain when your wife clearly poisoned you, That's some Meta Meming.
CargitoErgoSum
im a professional memer.
Daloth
If you can meme + get in universe referencew to the real world from the meme you have at least a doctorate in them. Or PHM, Pretty Hot Memes
smooshiebanana
She probably has put slow acting poison in the other one.
navyjeff
Reminds me of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23dzdvoU1vA
FlatPlutoSociety
Or put the poison in her own, because being married to @OP is a fate worse than death.
FuzzyMedic
The poison for hubby, the poison designed specifically for hubby, hubby's poison. Riiight.
DirtyBirdofQuestionableGeometry
Maybe she IS the slow acting poison.
malaka420
lool
DNAdartboard
I usually say that when I drop food on the floor, want the bigger piece, or made it special.
DirtyBirdofQuestionableGeometry
"Special"
JollyGreenAl
Like "Special Brownies" special?
DNAdartboard
Lohocla
like iocane powder?
pizzapartyhard
Like ground up glass a la Oz.
Everythingisracist
The secret is that I have built up a tolerance
BenderBendingRrodriguez
Inconceivable!
smooshiebanana
No, that would be fast acting, if it were a real thing.
Lohocla
well, yeah, this is true.....was thinking more along the lines of weak enough in small enough dosages that you can build an immunity
dontcallmeplath
As basically a wife, it only seems identical. I make smaller portions, little tweeks to my own. His usually has double whatever mine has.
wheresthebaby
Basically?
ErinSparkles
And see here mine would have that extra slice of cheese or bacon and I would give my hubby the one lacking that extra slice bit.
ihavenoideawhatthefuckimdoing
Either that or mine is fresher/hotter
zatgal
This. Pasta, for example. I give him less onions and more mushrooms when I serve it, because I know that's how he likes it. Love as food.
Thor1229
I always give my husband the better one. Double cheese, toasted more evenly, mine usually has pepperoni in too.
Raecracy123abc
I love how all the "basically wives" (me too) are all like "yeah I do that too." While all the wives are like aaa-hell-nawl
MickChester
I always give my boyfriend the "better" dish.
CryloRen
Just served my boyfriend the bigger portion of fish, haha. It's true. I put more care into his.
Penguinsandbroadswords
He likes his burnt more but only on one side. And he likes mustard on them (gross). So if he eats mine, I go hungry, because I won't eat his
punkybeanster
I put mayo on mine and husband hates mayo.
DrJeremyStone
"As basically a wife"......go on...
Shayceror
Mom here- mine has mustard inside, theirs do not. We have Fiestaware so the mustardy one is always on blue, theirs is on any color plate.
bunnyrut
yeah. i take the ugly and smaller portions for myself when serving.
doyouthinkthisisagamenothisispatrick
Awwww
WolfPrincess69
This!!
IDidntWantToDoThis
I often add a little ham and mustard to my grilled cheese. My wife doesn't care for that as much.
broodletoodle
I get my stuff just a little bit crispier. Then he tells me all my crispy food is gonna give me cancer. Still delicious
MoreCowBellBaby
DrYoloMcSwagmasterIIIEsq
Burnt food is carcinogenic
broodletoodle
like barely....everything is carcinogenic
rumnmonkey
You get rid of that man!
broodletoodle
he still burns it for me anyway!
ViolentGrace
Yep. My bf of 8 years gets double cheese and lots of butter. Mines scattered cheese and JUST enough butter to toast it.
LamarTheHeadhumper
:C that sounds awful. Why would anyone do that to themselves *says a fat dude*
ViolentGrace
Using a quality cheese it melts and fills the whole sandwich. I use it just for dipping in tomato soup, so it still tastes wonderful.
IProvideFakeContext
Thats the dream right there.
TheBestRussian
Why's everyone giving their husband the better one?? Fuck that, I'm taking the one with more cheese. Damn now I want a cheese sandwich.
spaceystacey
I take the last one cuz it's warmer.
hottamalehothottamal
I give him the one that looks nicer, but mine probably has 3x the amount of cheese.
Tripstone
Husband is taller and bigger than me, if I ate the way he did I'd be a pale blueberry of fat
TheBestRussian
So's mine but I somehow manage to eat more than him. To be fair, it does show... :/
NotSoSmartAlek
Pleased to make your acquaintance, Ms. Beuaregarde!
thefuzziestnipplesever
Kate? Is that you?
TheBestRussian
Is Kate russian?
thefuzziestnipplesever
Anastasia? Is that you?
TheBestRussian
Still nope
Tyrannotron
Trying to fatten him up so other women won't want him and he'll be stuck with you? Clever.
FullMetalBitch
I starve mine so he's so skinny he needs me to get around
BiologicallyHazardousMaterial
Does he wear you like a suit of armor?
blainetog
Yes, but only for one part.
BiologicallyHazardousMaterial
Pictures or lies. WE DEMAND TO SEE ALCHEMICAL COD PIECES!
Elunar