SteelMakesMeHard
418039
13800
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Laughed my ass off. It was a beautiful thing.
That is all..
Happy browsing
FP edit: I wasn't expecting this to make FP. On that note.. to all the people calling bullshit.. I give zero fucks. it was a funny moment for me. I really don't care if strangers on the internet believe me or not. As for where my son learned it.. i'm not 100% sure. i've watched shanghai noon with him once and his grandmother listens to james brown.. but i suspect he learned it from Pinky Pie (My Little Pony). Do what you do imgur (the same goes for the nay-sayers)
UselessCargo
Things that didn't happen.
RetardedFireExtinguisher
The Karazy Kid (2017)
judocop
My kid will know judo and will say, "judo know if I got a gun... judo know if I got a knife..."
Dwizzard121
b4il3y
CreatureFromtheBlackLegume
Don't hit me--i'll hit me!
imgursresidentasshole
/r/thathappened
zylex
Was his name Arnold?
Scallamoosh
Hungrypiemonger
swiggity swooty i'm moving with my booty
toxiclulz
Hizoran
Get him a tapout shirt, then people will know he's tough
CAPLOCKSCREAMS
Good ol' James brown reference - kid's got style
TyrisGC
Owen Wilson <.< >.>
tiduszecht
"I don't know Karate, but I DO know Karazy." -Roy O'Bannon (Owen Wilson) [Shanghai Noon
michaelshobermansphere
Taught my daughter if someone hits her, hit them back harder. At pre-k, a big kid pushed her and she pushed him so hard he hit a wall, and
michaelshobermansphere
...started crying. That was the last she got bullied. She is now 18, at Uni and sassy af. Fuck bullies.
RenegadeTQ
I too, have seen that episode of Hey Arnold!
chickenmilanga
That's my self-defense tactic against other humans.
Bhx1993
I just start telling the guy that I'm gonna jerk him off, haven't lost a fight yet. Jerked 2 guys off, but never lost.
heyguysitsmeamanda
This was my favorite comment by far.
metalfoto
Uh your kid rocks!
turketron3000
So your son quotes a James Brown song? Mhmm.
blanco6969
Then everyone clapped.
DrSymphonic
I taught my kids Krav Maga & not to strike until the other person takes a swing. They had no problems striking a bully hard to stun them.
SteelMakesMeHard
Good for you :) +1
eclecsys
Krav Maga is the shit
ElderMaxson
Ah, your son got the "Terrifying Prescence" Perk early.
CthulhusGreasyBallsack
as well as the "Confirmed Bachelor"
TheOtherOneWithTheHair
HAhhahahha well played +1
thelegendaryWhiteyDionysus
How much James Brown is he exposed to?
SteelMakesMeHard
A good amount :)
OneShucklak
So which is it, James Brown or shanghai noon?
SteelMakesMeHard
Both. I watched Shanghai noon with the kid once. His grandmother likes James brown. But he could have gotten it from my Little pony.
GuitarMuscles
You don't mess with crazy, man.
USSRsub
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdeP3KRCPXQ
TheHeathLedger
The karazy*
nebworb
Pulling the Hey Arnold on that fool.
Kittybitters
Don't hit me, I'll hit me!
RUBIX3D
Hashbrown123
4 hours until you die!!!
Lobuttomize
The most real story
krispykreme420glazeit
Of all the stories that _definitely happened_....
GifIsPronouncedJif
I'm pretty sure jokes don't need to be real to be funny.
cucumberboy
if they present themselves as so I would feel deceived!
TheOtherOneWithTheHair
Yeah, don't mind some mediocre joke but they're going to insult our intelligence with the "I'm a proud father, this totes happened" fuck 'em
ZombieZooZombieZoo
Then the entire classroom clapped
rickeyspanish
The line is from Shanghai Noon. Maybe his kid saw that movie.
superwasabi
and before that movie it was a james brown lyric
takeoffurpantsandjacket
Or maybe the dad did
Espio217
Dude. +1 for the Shanghai noon reference. your kid a boss.
HellhathnofurylikeIdoLogan
That's where my brother and I get 60% of our jokes.
SteelMakesMeHard
He's only seen it once :)
OneShucklak
So which one is it, James Brown or shanghai noon?
SteelMakesMeHard
Shanghai noon from me, James brown from Grandma and the. There is the possibility he got it from my Little pony.
brianthefly
You have give him right direction!
RiririricketyCricket
James Brown actually said that
OneShucklak
I just got so sad thinking that an eight year old referenced the payback just to learn he was referencing Chris rock
GeraldsNinjaStar
Who was referencing James Brown – The Payback
ShadoWulfI17
He was referencing Owen Wilson tho.....
scotthamm5
And then the whole dojo applauded.
ShadowBannedForMakingMemes
That dojo's name? Albert Einstein
AfroSamuraiRM
The sensei? Bill Cosby
ihateeverythingandmore
hehe
LongCommentChainAppreciator
Feel drowzy het?
LongCommentChainAppreciator
*yet
Mackwop
Never understood why people feel the need to make shit up
PffftNext
Just cos nothing noteworthy ever happens in your life doesn't mean the same is true of the rest of the 7 billion people here. Idiot
Mackwop
You seem very upset that I dont believe a strangers fake story
PffftNext
Because im sick of people here never believing any fun story they hear. Are you seriously suggesting that no stories like this ever happen?
ElCabaro
There is no mercy in this dojo!
Johnnybeesknees
This kid is going to win a lot of fights without laying a finger on anyone
AREALLTHEGOODNAMESTAKEN
Thats what sun tzu taught and how I've won all my fights
personwhotakesfleetfootwork
This post is me_irl and that's kind of a good thing I guess I mean you lose social skills but gain automatic protection from fuckboys
PuppermintJerryJr
THIS KID IS GOING PLACES.
TotallyNotADogPlottingWorldDomination
Sun Tzu says: "Supreme excellence consists of breaking your enemy's resistance with autism"
ThisWasATriumph
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pN8E8L5c9WI
shigetsu
did that in middle school in a sense. got jumped when i left PE got gutpunched and then a knee to the head just askd you done? & walked away
shigetsu
too be fair the 3 kids were kinda weak. but they didnt even look at me after that so win win
TangoIndiaTangoSierra
ADHD kids have mastered crazy before birth!
KingZullu
The legend of the unfingered
tamalero
unless he does that near a cop.. D:
TheOtherOneWithTheHair
Acting a little crazy is not a crime, threatening someone with assault is, the other guy would get a talking to and that'd be the end of it.
tamalero
Not in this environment of fear man. Id bet they would tazze you.
Rorandes
Don't hit me! I'll hit me! Ow! I'm crazy!
imnotinprisonhidingaphoneinmybutt
Works in prison too, though you may want to set your sights higher for your son.
TheOne07
Dude. I just realized he is the future King. (From OPM)
TheFinalDoctor
Hey Arnold
CodySchoenthal
I was so worried no one else thought that immediately
scooterific
This may be true but wouldn't hurt to teach him self defense anyway in the case that he meets someone who is actually crazy
WARHAMMER405
Sun Tzu would be proud.
texasjimmy
Half the the fight is knowing one's capabilities
samsonguy920
That's the right way to do it. Duels have never happened because the two challengers got so into rules and exceptions that they just decided
samsonguy920
> a draw was good enough.
bronypokey6918
til he is 17 and gets his ass kicked for looking like a dipshit.
intruding1
Really though, the crazy kid at my school never got picked on because he promised any fight would be to the death
drunkinstupor
'Nutter'
BiteTheHandsThatThieve
Like that video where the dude challenges people and then strips down to his undies.
TheDamDog
Works really well until the other guy starts to strip too
Dumbstatz
how i avoided being bullied my entire childhood
NotAMeatPopsicle
In highschool: 5-1 is bad odds, so pointed out my risks in a bar punch in the head which means my only option is to fight for my life. 1/
NotAMeatPopsicle
So i thought I was going to get my ass handed to me but 3 of them were going to have to explain why two of their buddies were dead.It worked
choggie
My personal formula was crazy first, fight and either make a friend or worse enemy then at at that stage, premeditated/orchestrated revenge.
MrHasuu
i actually fought back, and they never bothered me again. i guess i dont have enough karazy
Uplinkdsanrok
Later in life, "Do you want me to jerk you off? Hey, everybody I think he wants me to jerk him off." -Sammy Cacciatore, BMS show
Uplinkdsanrok
Quick thinking kiddo OP
spongebobsdeaduncle
Johnnybeesknees
Oh that's perfect
ButLogicallyTho
"I didnt think he could, but i wasnt gonna mess around and find out"
Pootisborn
When Megaman finally finds a use for the top spin.
V3G4N
Hilarious
IDrinkAndIKnowNothing
Source?
TheBestBlasian
The 2016 Rio Olympics
HawkthePlayer
The art of fighting, without the fighting?
JasonThorn
If you can win without resorting to violence, you beat them physically AND psychologically.
HawkthePlayer
Sun Tzu knowledge right there.
TheOtherOneWithTheHair
The real art of fighting without fighting
SteelMakesMeHard
Yup :) he pulled off crazy really well too.
Gonz000
Gonz000
TheCuntCrusader
Too well...
eldarriath
He learned from the best...
VoIdemort
Take your shirt off. If that doesn't work, get completely naked. If that doesn't work, put a rock in your shirt and helicopter it at face.
Chewbaccabra
CheezeWhiz
I think you mean KARAZY.
Czarmorte
I would say he's a black belt in Karazy then. :)
NoSelfiesOfficer
Not to worry. He will be like the dude that won't get in any fights because every respects his humor.
Buckbeak1486
Should have filmed it!
SteelMakesMeHard
Me and my family were just talking about that
TheWizardsWife
I'm sure you'll have another opportunity someday.
DeathB4DNF
Full crazy would be stripping down naked, a former Navy guy I know did this and it was fucking hilarious.
realOnYx
pics or it didnt happen, also i dont believe u bcause MURICA
beerlady
I've seem that done to break up a fight in high school.
HafCoJoe
I uh, think that might be taking it a bit far for an 8 Y.O...
LurkerByNature
Some kid on the playground grabbed my daughters hair at pre-school. My son ran over, pulled them apart, and stood nose-to-nose with the kid-
redheadedsloot
When I was in kindergarten a boy tried to kiss me under the monkey bars so I punched him in the face. Mom laughed so hard she cried
gingerjess
I've only been in one fist fight, and it was about my baby brother. Who tries to pick a fight with a toddler in a stroller?
noturaveragepunk
Me and my brother are real close in age and he used to be really small so I had to step in between him and a few bullies
Ilovealldogtypes
Once I stood up for a group of girls by scratching the bully and then I got in trouble. I learned the lesson "no good deed goes unpunished".
PedestrianElectrobastard
Yeah. The only thing more certain to get you in trouble is defending yourself.
TheWuggening
Still have to do it though
PedestrianElectrobastard
Defend yourself or defend others? I'd rather be in jail than get killed, but as for others, society has made its decision as far as I care .
TheWuggening
idk... I could go either way on, really. Robbing someone the opportunity to learn to defend themselves might not be a moral good. 1/2
itsybitsyspider
Mostly because of the "Zero tolerance" bullshit that doesn't care what happened. The defended and aggressor will get suspended either way.
Thatoneguywhogot18kdownvotesin24hr
My little sister in kindergarten didn't take shit from anyone first kid tryed to bully her she threw to the ground and was slamming his 1/2
Thatoneguywhogot18kdownvotesin24hr
Head in the concert over and over again and if the teacher didn't step in probably would have killed him moral of story don't pick on people
pleaseusethisaccount
or moral of the story your little sister sounds like a psycho
waggadaoku
"Slamming his head in the concert"
v
Girtouh
"Slamming his head in the concrete"
HandsomeSwede
Slamming his head in the concert? Sounds like a good time
classifiedairspace
LurkerByNature
And said "Run inside sister. Run inside and don't watch." If a teacher hadn't shown up I firmly believe my son would have gone Liam Neeson
dschuma
I got chills
DiabloD3
Good kid, I like his style.
OfficialJoeBiden
I wish I could be that big of a badass
IShouldBeStudyingRightNowInsteadOfBrowsingImgur
Sheepdog.
TaviTurtlebear
DingleBits
Your kid knows how to instill fear, I like it.
Hanakimi
My brother usually participated in the bullying so I love knowing brothers like this really do exist.
joshgrimm
"... and don't watch" is what turns this from scary to pants-shitting.
Imightbethedroidyourelookingfor
I was 11 years old and snapped when I kid my age was bullying my 6 year old brother. I grabbed him by his shirt and lifted him up 1/2
Imightbethedroidyourelookingfor
Against a wall. Told him to never lay a hand on my brother again. Shook for an hour afterwards.
fudgesickle
You did good!
ZarcharyTaylor
Plot twist: brother is 27.
SanJoseSpartan
This gave me a solid morning chuckle
BlindyBlindMansSonnySon
had to restrain my self from chinning a 3 year old into the stratosphere after he hit my kid in the face with a toy dinosaur
DrLongSchlongius
How would he "stand" nose to nose with the kid then? Is he also Peter Dinklage?
beerlady
and a half
ThereIsNoWayImChangingMyNameToThat
Iunderstoodthatreference.jpg
67cows
...Donuts high
NeckDeepInAHorse
*wide
Califoxxycation
high.
67cows
*tall
GrabEmByTheEmbassy
You don't know his life.
SupercalifragilisticexpialidociousShenanigans
Why not both?