jestefarean
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Oct 9, 2017 9:29 AM
jestefarean
207466
4458
279
saderzh
Udder nonsense
CtrlAltDav
What a douche
Knopperz
Now we just need a cow that leaps at about 25,000 miles per hour.
NotTheHeroWeNeed
But it's ~250K miles, travel time would be 10hrs not 3 days! I admit I've put too much thought into this... still...
robogeek78
What if she only jumps over the moon from a single point of view, from any other point of view she is just jumping
Alexpil
That cow would die in the vacuum of space.
borislives
As long as it makes the little dog laugh when it sees such sport. Also, has anyone seen my dish and spoon?
leftbanana
In fairy tales, cows jumping over the moon are impervious to friction and can traverse the distance in seconds
DoubleDutchButtTouch
https://media.tenor.com/images/1e7327f4bcaddd37e933bded98e639ea/tenor.gif
KharnApproves
"Hi kids, my name is Neil and despite having an advanced degree, all I do is talk shit on everything and make other adults hate science."
idonthavetimeforthiseither
Do you hate science now?
pixe1adrift
But science has proven you can only kiss yourself on the lips in a mirror
Chikun31
Did he essentially just say that a cow can jump over the moon if a cow was physically able to?
PineappleMigraine
I really think he's forgotten how to human.
FeelzGood2Poo
How it feels to chew 5 gum
XChiefAwesomeX
I've always wondered how much he got his ass kicked in high school because he's a total prick now.
AVoiceOfReason
Probably not, because millions of people like him. He's one of the greatest science communicators out there.
TheLannistersSendALovelyFruitBasket
"About"? Neil? If I'm gonna get my cow-flinger working, I can't have 'about'
GhostBear3067
Ok, so Super Cow then, got it.
Zixtank
Finally someone mention Super Cow.
ohgreatcthulhumonster
I honestly cannot stand this man
magoslich
I think if he adjusted his tone a bit he could do well, he has done some great initiatives for public sci discussion but needs work.
Granddellfthegrand
I feel like he is trying too hard to appear smart.
DanFranzen
Depends on where the cow jumps from! How fast would the leap need to be if she jumped from the ISS?
Xenolith166
No idea but it would knock the ISS ut of orbit
Xenolith166
*out
DanFranzen
What if it was a calf instead?
Xenolith166
Still would
Ilovechocolatetitties
Am I the only one that's getting sick of his shit?
Zorbaq
No. I used to like this guy. Then he started tweeting these pretentious "science facts".
Ilovechocolatetitties
Exactly! He went from being that likable nerd to being a pretentious d-bag. This is why Mr Wizard is better than him and Bill Nye
ThanatosElNyx
Everytime someone posts one of his tweets, he gets a ton of hate, so no, you are not the only one.
hereforcake
I was never not sick of him. I never thought he was more than a stage presence even with his education.
LordOfTheDownvotes
He always seemed like that guy who posts "enlighted by my own intelligence" stuff on facebook.
walkingtallmachinegunman
This is obnoxious "The impossible is possible if you did this impossible thing to do it" - Neil deGrasse Tyson 2017
percivaldanvers
Wouldn't the air friction of moving at 25,000 mph incinerate the cow anyway?
MotionOfTheOcean
That's the joke
AVoiceOfReason
Same as xkcd comics. If that's obnoxious to you, you have a very weak threshold for what is obnoxious. It's a thought experiment.
walkingtallmachinegunman
It's not a thought experiment, it's useless rambling accompanied by numbers. A cow could also jump over the moon if we bred them the 1/
walkingtallmachinegunman
size of Neptune, or if we shrunk the moon to the size of a beach ball. It's a couple of equations more than the thought of 2/
walkingtallmachinegunman
a 6 year old presented as if it were a witty and relevant statement. "Dad, a cow can jump over the moon if hes fast". "Thats great sweetie"
AVoiceOfReason
Yeah, exactly like xkcd. The earth won't stop spinning. Yet people still enjoy the what if. Get over yourself.
Yueling
Ok but what about the dish and the spoon
jazzmatazz
Little boy blue and the man and the moon?
JasonThorn
When ya comin' home, son?
CrystalFier
I don't know when...
TheVaal
But we'll get together then
Ragnarok1030
This dude is such a dickhead.
AVoiceOfReason
What is wrong with his tweet?
RedDwarfIV
I don't think they're talking about this tweet specifically, although taken in context with his other tweets this can sound worse than it is
Frenchgeek
https://what-if.xkcd.com/28/
JBib
That was wonderful.
Andromedator
Why can't we favorite comments!?
jestefarean
Totally need to try this!!!
magoslich
XKCD's what if series is super good.
DJJazzyJNet
"As far as I know, this steak question originally came up in a lengthy 4chan thread, which quickly disintegrated into poorly-informed...
DJJazzyJNet
...physics tirades intermixed with homophobic slurs. There was no clear conclusion." Priceless lol
SvarvSven
A wild ride from the start, thanks
MidgetWearingaBikini
Is math related to science?
VerityCarlo
No, not really
Applepotamus
Knux101
Where did this come from
absolutezero182
Katy Perry did an interview with him. She asked that question
Knux101
Is Katy that tarded
absolutezero182
It gets so much worse. She tries to be relevant and make comments throughout, and she just doesn't do well
Knux101
link?
TheWorldIsATollFreeToilet
No, real science doesn't use numbers.
ChetManley
plot twist, upper division math classes are harder when there are numbers (proofs, logic and set theory)
mcshady
But we do use calculus. It's just all variables.
NeilTysonsAstrophysics
And/or set some shit equal to 1
PigMarshBetweenTwoSaltWaters
This is physics. Physics is essentially explaining the universe using maths. So yes.
RealFuckinNito
I... don't even know if you're serious. But in case you are: That answer can best be classified as "it's complicated", on the one hand math
RealFuckinNito
itself isn't bound by scientific laws because it deals in proof and absolutes, science deals in probabilites, margins of error, theories and
RealFuckinNito
evidence. BUT, well how do you think we calculate said margins of error, probabilites, etc. At the end of the day most scientific laws are
RealFuckinNito
or can be expressed as equations and maths are definitelly used in scientific fields, but only to process evidence, not as a source of
RealFuckinNito
evidence. And yes, that IS a very important distinction because the reason why math deals in absolutes is that it's abstract and therefore
JaromirAzarov
Bullshit. That cow would decelerate down to 0 mph in a few milliseconds (at most) due to the air resistance.
Orangicus
No, no, ignore how the cow would stop due to being torn apart by the same atmospheric resistance. I see.
GiantRobotsRule
Just squirt milk in the opposite direction to for the additional thrust needed.
FoxXTale
I’m not even going to BEGIN explaining for you
TooDumbForRickandMorty
Hey get that air resistance out of here, we're talking about a cow jumping the moon, keep it high school
rabbiebabbie
"Children, the world is like a perfect vacuum with no other forces to play with" jk wait until college
CrusherOfCities
https://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/experiment.png
AndrePositivityCat
A few milliseconds can’t even be imaginably accurate. I would think it more likely for the cow to be torn to shreds from friction.
JaromirAzarov
Considering what happens when something hits the surface of water too fast, I'd assume it's as the cow would hit a mountain...
thrain5
Mmmm. Well done steak.
FortressCraft
Assuming you're right (you're not), then launch it at 250,000 mph. Or 2.5 million mph. 25,000 would overcome airfriction tho.
JaromirAzarov
At ground level air pressure, the breaking force on the cow would initially be around 50,000 kN at 11176 m/s -> 50.000 m/s² deceleration.
JaromirAzarov
However, I hardly think the usual formulas for air resistance can still be applied to such extreme cases.
FortressCraft
Oh, it'd work, but you have to pretend the cow wouldn't turn into a fine mist :)
Axelord
This reminds me of that one time nuke-engineers put a what amounts to a manhole cover into space. Probably. Maybe. Parts of it. Some atoms.
DrSparken
There wasn't enough air in front of it to actually stop it, particularly when accounting for tumble that would let it pass through much 1/
DrSparken
without impacting. Similarly there wouldn't be enough to hit for huge amounts of heating - it may have been partially melted and may have 2/
DrSparken
broken up into a few chunks just due to stress, but it likely would go into space with a good fraction of its speed, largely intact. 3/3
Bunsen
It was 4 inches thick, so each square cm of face has 82g of steel behind it and 1.03kg of air in front of it. Even with random tumbling...
Bunsen
reducing the average projected area, that's gonna stop.
DrSparken
Not when it's starting from at least 60 km/s. It can take *all* air in front of it with it and get hours of hang-time.
Xenolith166
Well first off the friction and subsequent rise in temperature would likely be sufficient to atomize the cow almost instantaneously.
JaromirAzarov
Kinda like jumping into water from very high kills you because it's like hitting concrete at those speeds. /2
Xenolith166
Right, yeah, that too. Crushed into a cowcake, then ablated away into nothing. Still, it'd die pretty quick.
JaromirAzarov
Not even considering the amount of energy it's muscles would have used to accelerate it to 25.000 mph would've burned it up already...
JaromirAzarov
I'm not sure. I think that the cow would be crushed due to the extremely high air pressure caused by the fast acceleration to 25000mph. /1
JazzandRain
Regardless, wouldn't the cow just end up painting the landscape?
JaromirAzarov
Pretty much. The question is if that paint would be more reddish or more blackish...
PabloIsGreat
What if we put the cow in a frictionless perfect cone?
JaromirAzarov
Then we shove that cone & cow arrangement up NDTs fat ass for posting such utter nonsense on Twitter...
SeanQuixote
Udder nonsense*
JaromirAzarov
Shame on me for not thinking of that pun myself...
Dispari
Assume a spherical cow.
idonthavetimeforthiseither
With a massive flatulence problem
JaromirAzarov
Doesn't change much. cw of a sphere is 0,45, cow probably 0,75.
Zokalwe
In a vacuum.
Counterfit
But not a Dyson
boogermonster
Jesus, Neil! How about 1 day @ 75,000 mph? Efficiency, Neil... learn it
MarsMatter
But then it won't be hopping over the Moon, that would be going right past it into deep space. Free return trajectories are a thing though.
bwatne97
yeah this all sounds like a matter of speed..I thought Neil was supposed to be smart.
HiggsBosonYoFace
As long as we're talking about impossible jumps, the cow could aim for where the moon will be in 1.3 seconds & leap at the speed of light.
0xFADE
Trajectory doesn't work that way. The goal was to jump over the moon. Not shoot past it and never come back
AVoiceOfReason
Then you're above escape velocity. This is why you're not a scientist and Neil is.
miados
well to go over the moon you have to circle it and return. if you go to fast you wouldnt return since the moons gravity would be lacking
IUpvoteForFood
Does imgur still hate Neil? Is that still a thing?
fadecomic
Found the project manager.
SixFeetShort
The problem with that is that the animal would shoot past instead of catching a gravity slingshot. It would die. ANIMAL HATER!
rockerBOO
If you go too fast you won't go over it but get launched into space
Kork
Yes because you don't want to launch into space when jumping over the moon.
BlackTrashTiger
Escape Velocity.
theros
Well I mean, *technically* that's still over the moon. Just way, way, way over.
Jbaryla
But if you go to fast the cow won't catch the moon's gravity and instead of jumping over it it will just jump past it
randelung
Well drag isn't linear, so if you want to be there three times as fast you'd have to go 9 times the initial speed.
Higure
Except the drag is only present the first fraction of the journey.
randelung
Fair enough, I was thinking of satellite height. The moon is of course way higher up, so I guess drag isn't really that detrimental.
Melonfish
This would be passing rather than over the moon. Too much speed and you won't get gravity capture. Assuming a cow has no thrust ability.
mwoodman
The existence of baby cows proves your assumption wrong.
ConsiderateFlag
cows definitely have thrust ability.
ElbowDeepInAHorse
So do horses.
TheDairyPope
If it's thrust you want, you need a bull.
jestefarean
8 hours at 225k seem reasonable?
KohlThaler
what about puting ths cow on a metal platform and lighting a nuke underneath
unknownmale
ashes to ashes... beef to dust
CASREP
Floor it??
TheLazyLibrarian
How about we do this without killing the cow? Hm? On that note, does anyone know how many Gs a cow can take before it turns into a mush?
JHawke
Cowphysics are a tad different from ours but mine has just told me it is approximately 6 MOOs and a smacking sound.
unknownmale
8 hours at minus 41 degrees celcius... she'd be frosen solid
OneShot510
So........ a cowsickle? Or moosickle?
doggiedawg
For my salary? Sure! For cow chuckin... Not so much.
jimicus
Nah, the cow would burn up at that speed. And what sort of monster eats their steak well-done?
Jwhite777
It would burn up from the radiation in the Van Allen belt as well.
StephNugs
My mom's ex. He always cooked shitty cuts well done. It was terrible and so so dry.
[deleted]
[deleted]
bwatne97
fastest achieved so far
SNoodleWatcher
Yea cause all those cows that realistically jump 25,000 mph
Freeflare
By humans, those cows have very advanced 'Moon jump' technology.
utkarshtyagi
So we talking realistic shit?
CalleC
Don't think a toilet can survive a 36,000 mph shit
SatansTesticles
It cant
galvertez
wanna bet
GoodChange
"Realistic" sure but it would have to be a pretty fit cow
HumanVector
Fastest achieved by a human* We don't know how fast cows can take off at.
ThePsychicZombie
Cows weigh more than people and assuming that their tech would be on-par with humans is fair for the sake of a hypothetical physics prompt.
DoingItWrongSince1980
I hear that their methane based propellant is pretty effective.
mwoodman
20 speed.
demodulated
They can achieve a little extra thrust with simultaneous coordinated udder squirts.
lurkinforlove
galvertez
if that was a comic strip i would read that comic strip
demodulated
It's not the same but I always loved Cudley the Cowlick in the TMNT comics.
Rip42
Na, they use those as control thrusters.
demodulated
Science has come a long way. We use aerosol spray cheese canisters for that now.
DremStiildViing
Reaction controller udders
guywithapetfish
This MF must sit at his desk all day thinking up pointless stuff to say to try to remind people he's smarter than them
swedishish
"...smarter than they are.*" https://imgur.com/WLuyUyH
ingelri
Yes, but this one was pretty funny though.
nipplepanties
Aaahhhkchtually
NovaAtdosk
Dammit let me favorite comments imgur
idonthavetimeforthiseither
He is smarter than most, why do you seem to have a problem with that?
AVoiceOfReason
Why is it not okay for him, but perfectly okay for what-ifs on xkcd? Quit being intimidated. Take interest and participate in the humour.
jdtempl242
Cause what ifs have a lot of thought and effort put in. NDT didn't even account for air resistance!
LickingTillMyTongueFallOff
Except he tweets wrong stuff from time to time.
AisforIlliterate
Eh. Not all his jokes come across, but I found this one funny. It's just some basic math anyway.
AisforIlliterate
Well, basic algebra.
OtterAvalanche
As much as im inclined to agree, i think this post in particular is neat and cute.
SprungLake
This is supposed to be funny though
Greatwood
He kinda goes into that in one of his specials. Says he is one of the luckiest people on the planet cause he can just sit and think
Timeandrelativedimensionsinspaghetti
At least he's qualified to talk about the stuff he does, unlike Bill Nye who just as a mechanical engineering degree
idonthavetimeforthiseither
Take mechanical engineering and get back to us about easy it is. Try not to committ suicide when you realize how much you overreached
Timeandrelativedimensionsinspaghetti
It must be very hard if it also makes you a evolutionary biologist and a climate scientist.
Timeandrelativedimensionsinspaghetti
It's like saying that a guy with a business law degree could be a financial analyst. They aren't the same
idonthavetimeforthiseither
Engineering helps develop an analytical mind. It doesn't limit you to one field. Good people don't fit into boxes like you believe.
Timeandrelativedimensionsinspaghetti
Thats is the most sanctimonious piece of crap I've ever heard. He's a tv show host trying to stay relevant and you know it
PigMarshBetweenTwoSaltWaters
His job is to teach people about science; this is what he does in his tweets. I don't know why you interpret this as him reminding you 1/2
EruditeLeanings
If this was all he was doing then why didn't he mention the cow would die in space and not achieve the 'jump'?
idonthavetimeforthiseither
You seem to not
doingallthethings
I think it’s the subtlety of “FYI” at the beginning as if to say “look what I knew and you didn’t you ignorant swine”
PigMarshBetweenTwoSaltWaters
that he's smarter than you are, or why you feel the need to be a twat. If you don't like him, move on. I thought it was funny. 2/2
guywithapetfish
I'm not saying this makes me think he's smarter than me, just that that's what he's going for. Look up his leap day tweet
idonthavetimeforthiseither
He is smarter than you. So what? There's a guy half my age at work who's a lot smarter than me. Love talking with him and learn a lot daily
guywithapetfish
There's not much educational about this. He basically did a highschool physics level calculation and didn't demonstrate how
DudePlayinADudeDisguisedAsAnotherDude
Kind and f like if you don’t like this comment you could not be a twat and just move on?
magoslich
I get that he is something of a 'face' of science. But he is often smug or pedantic about it and I feel his mannerisms could be better 1/2
magoslich
if he is trying to be another Sagan. Neil has good content sometimes but he jumps out of his lane a lot and it breaks down imo.
idonthavetimeforthiseither
Opinion ain't truth
magoslich
And? That doesn't negate what I have to say about him. If he is to be an envoy of science, perception of him is very important to the role.
idonthavetimeforthiseither
No, peer review, results, evidence, knowledge count, not whether or not you step on some cupcakes toes
mandadadada
I don't think he does this to brag, some people really love science, just like imgur loves memes.
blahblahghost
It's a little of both. Watch him interact with other science presenters like Bill Nye/etc. you can see that they're annoyed by him a lot.
AVoiceOfReason
No they're not. You're imagining that. Bill Nye and others speak very highly of him.
mandadadada
Plus how can you be bragging by making some simple calculations. It's just a tweet, can hardly post serious shit at 140 characters anyways
DudePlayinADudeDisguisedAsAnotherDude
Nah, he’s definitely a pompous ass.
mandadadada
He could be more humble. As there are plenty of other "science people" who are. But I still think he is pretty 'okay' all thing considered
JamesProton
Almost everything he tweets tries to sound like a profound statement. For me personally, it gets old fast
mandadadada
He is not my favorite "science" person but yeah I don't think he is a good comedian honestly. But I find him mildly interesting atm
delecti
His tweets don't come off as "isn't this so cool?", but instead "well actually". Look to Carl Sagan or Richard Feynman to see it done well.
magoslich
That is my general criticism of him. He seems to be trying to fill that void but hasn't captured the tone of either which can be bad.
Velisity
I dont like him that much. Im so glad he wasn't a part of the series "how the universe works" which is a fav of mine
ThrobbinHoodz
He strikes me as the kind of person who rubs it in your face. Not a fan.
andergriff
His field aren’t supposed to have to deal with fame.
idonthavetimeforthiseither
He's doing a good enough job at it
magoslich
I'm hoping he readjusts after a bit and learns how to better present his discussions over time.
andergriff
To be fair, the internet kind of put him on a pedestal, and I don’t really blame him for letting it go to his head, considering people in1/2
rabbiebabbie
That's funny cause all your trends and family told me you love when guys rub it in your face
ftwcode
One day you'll see Tyson as the clowning attention whore that he is and STFU. I loved this guy, but it's over.
yourbodyonscience
ThrobbinHoodz
Heyyooooooooooo
Velisity
...ok.. Youre sooo hilarious.
rabbiebabbie
My trends and family think I'm hilarious
Madchair
Somebody please call an ambulance, there's a 3rd degree burn
mandadadada
All over but specially onnthebface