More DnD Stuff to please the Eyestalks of the Beholder.

Rogue “First off, no. I don’t want to break your kitchen.”

DM “You mean my kitchen counter?”

Rogue “I know what I said.”

DM “Shouldn’t there be a secondly?

Rogue *looks at fingernails* “Wait for it.”

DM “Where did this bottle of wine come from? Who are these flowers for?”

Rogue “Read the card.”

DM *Reads* “‘Look up’. Look at...OH DEAR GOD! Put your shirt on! You can seduce the damn goblin. Just...hoerrff!! Urgh. I just threw up a little.”

That fine print though...

Player: So to solve this puzzle I have to hold my breath, stand on my head, and try to solve this riddle written in high Dwarven?

DM: *notes say hold up mirror to instructions that are written in reverse common* Sure, that’ll work!

Wiseass, literal minded, magic users.

Let’s be honest, this is the role of any DM or player in DnD.

Uncertain if this could work as a multi class. That would be badass. Necro-Botanist.