Day late first cakeday dump, excerpts from the first dump I ever favorited!

Sep 2, 2019 6:42 PM

Valtrith

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68655

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1061

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55

This problem goes farther than photojournalism.

If he's gonna get interviewed he is gonna look classy.

*Frantically reviews receipt*

To be fair you can't really read a sign at that angle.

They snuck into this dump, I didn't even know I downloaded this one, 13/10

I mean just in case I get famous...

Ravens, they're good people, even though they're birds.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Kids can be subversive little shits, but that still seems incredibly difficult...

That's a venty covera latte, acshchtually

Yay for water flavored soda!

Plus I have to pee

Yes, and now I am begging you, let this be the end of the conversation.

Pretty selfish tbh.

Oh, you're home? Whatever, I didn't even notice you were gone at all. Not like I stood at the door for 13 hours waiting for you to get home, all the while barking at even the slightest movement in the hopes it might be you pulling into the driveway. WHATEVER, GREG IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU I GUESS

I mean, that's what's happening, right?

Or until you realize you like them a LOT

Vietnam was bad

Hehe

that's literally what I said

LoOk HoW lOnG mY tOnGuE iS

the most important meal of the day

Nah bro, it's fine, I'll just eat both of these paninis

That is nice...

I have no fucks left because I gave them all away on accident

Never been to Nebraska

this is why he always looks so angry

he didn't turn the lights off, that's a vital step

Also recreational pizza, sometimes.

Yes to all

Perfectly inappropriate Joking Hazard strip that happened while my wife and I were playing the other day!

FP Edit: WOW! It only took a year! Damn folks, thanks a lot, glad you liked the things I stole and that one thing I didn't steal. In honor of the FP, perhaps just tell me something nice about your day. You know, if you want.

memes

cakeday

dump

hopeyouenjoy

justwannamaketheworldlaugh

#1 If the girlfriend doesn't understand sacrificing a piece of pasta for a cute cat photo, then keep the cat and leave the girlfriend.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Land of Lakes Butter Milk

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#30 Mine isn't long enough (flaccid) to choose a side. I wasn't aware that was a thing until I was an adult.

6 years ago | Likes 57 Dislikes 0

I’m right handed so I point it to the left...seems easier to pull out that way when toileting

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I wore briefs for the longest time, so I just pointed it up, regardless of if I had an erection.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Depends on the pants. Less room means you're more likely to have to pick a side. I prefer roomy pants, personally.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Land O Lakes Buttermilk

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Oooh that makes sense...

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For once, the OPs in between comments were actually funny. Well done you humorous fuck! +1

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#30 1)Yes 2)It just kinda hangs a certain way 3)No 4) Not if I'm careful 5) Not normally no. Suppose if I had a rash?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hahaha, nice..

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Felt rude to leave her question unanswered.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So #30 has just... Straight up never heard of underwear...?

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

sure but boxers are a thing, still a valid question

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Not everyone wears underwear. I always do, but lots of people don't.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 2

#30 I had my left leg removed when I was a teenager so I could wear regular pants. I just tuck my knob in my shoe walk around on it.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Fuckin' boss

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Woman bent over infront of me, I kicked her across the park

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I fully expect Disney princesses in there on their break

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Question is, between the villains and the heroes, who drinks whom under the table?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I've had some of the most vulgar and yet hilarious Joking Hazard combos... amazing.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I know, it's an amazing game! Forget to take pictures as often as I should I gotta say...

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#30 it's cold in here I guess.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm not that good at birds but my brain thinks all ravens have Horrifying Murder Death Beaks and so suspects those may be crows

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I was worried as well, but they do seem to have the larger bill so it is hard to tell...

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Enh, if this is the worst thing we're worrying about today, I'm not upset xD

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#30 Boxer-briefs and briefs come with a package pouch for a reason, and that reason is to preserve my equilibrium until engorgment!

6 years ago | Likes 31 Dislikes 1

I've never used that pouch.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Yeah I feel like that puts your stuff at a real weird angle...

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I just don’t get why the opening of the pouch isn’t right in the middle.It’s like you gotta torque your junk one direction then turn another

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I wear looser pants

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That is a wonderful idea, but then they bunch up under the belt!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Stole quite a few of these. Bravo!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

+1 epic ad block text

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Cynical me things the Raven images are shown in reverse order.

6 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

Omg say it ain't so!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Someplace tried to train ravens to pick up litter for automated rewards; maybe these are their descendants, seeing if the legend's true

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

That would be the best option...

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Regular me wonders

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Innocent me hadn't considered it until it was brought up

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I'm with you.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I can read, write and translate in Latin. I went to the British museum once and started translating most of the sculptures and artwork 1/2

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Because my dad wanted to know what everything said, and as I was translating, more people came up and thought I was part of the tour

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Were you a kid?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I was 15 at the time

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Was it fun for you, or did you feel weird?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#30 - Also would you consider wearing like a penis bra so you don't have this problem anymore? Or am I just talking about boxer briefs?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Your just thinking of briefs, Sports bra if boxer briefs and regular boxers are the equivalent of an old potatoe sack.

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Funny, that's what I call my scrotum.....old potatoe sack.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Boil em mash em?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Keep them out of my stew

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

how exactly the fuck do you screenshot a song?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Plug your nose and close your eyes simultaneously.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

As a Nebraskan - why the hostility to my state?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I apologize for the rudeness, but I honestly picked it so I could attract your attention and ask what Nebraska is like?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Wide open. Spending two+ hours driving to a destination isn't seen as a big deal. Football is the official State Religion. 1/

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

/2 Runza is a thing.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hey that sounds a lot like my state but soccer instead of football... What's a runza?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Runza A delicious, delicious thing.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

G_d made Nebraska so that we wouldn't have to drive through Kansas.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Which religion are you that you omit the "o" from God? I only just found out about people from some Jewish faiths doing this.

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

It's not my religion. It's out of respect for another's belief. He was Jewish.

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Does it even count when we can still easily figure out the missing letter and know what the word is supposed to be?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It's not about hiding the name. IIrc, they're forbidden from erasing the name "God" as it would be disrespectful, so they omit the O to

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

avoid erasing or destroying his name.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

#26 - As a Nebraskan - that stings, because, you know, the truth hurts and all.....

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oh no! You know I actually put that in there to get people like you! What's Nebraska like?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

LOL - I knew it! Honestly, it's mostly flat farm land. Distance is measured in time, not miles, for most of the state. #naturegetaway

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Haha, you knew correctly!! Damn right on... That sounds like a nice time occasionally?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

There just isn't much in the way of "modern convenience" accessible in most of the areas (and the midwest in general, tbh).

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It is actually a great place to visit (especially if you like the outdoors and a quiet surrounding/relaxed outing).

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I am a big fan of the outdoors, you make a good point there...

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0