algoritham
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Feb 14, 2026 6:37 AM
algoritham
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dixxienormus
That is so Dogist.
TeddyBruhsvelt
Honestly fuck the dog owners who don't have enough common sense or self awareness to realize that a business being "dog friendly" does not extend to behemoth massive dogs. And I say that as someone who loves big dogs
drGrafenberg
I mean, people are the worst people, and the worst people have the worst dogs.
Now, all the worst people, with the worst dogs, will all say that it’s the other people with the other dogs that are the worst.
This is both true and not true.
Nightcaste
My dog routinely sweeps the coffee table so I get this.
TheDoctorCrankenstein
Someone tried to bring in a Great Dane.
chinesemario
Hope they have a hitching Post and water trough out the front
netutoring
Whoever wrote this was clearly enjoying themselves.
Feralkyn
I enjoy it too. It's very well-written
Lugh314159
"Educational mineral science company" pffft..... Ten to one that's a healing crystal shop
Poppypoppoppop
Yea as a large dog owner myself, I can guarantee you WE KNOW. And you are acting in bad faith if you pretend you don't know.
HashMaster9k
This was written by David Dunchovny's character from the first "Beethoven" film.
v
FortifiedWhine
Very British sign. Also, Danes and Rotties basically have meaty whips attached to their bums. Prone to "happy tail" issues.
WhiteRhino723
"cross bred with a M1A1 Abrams tank" fucking lost it there!!!
tinyfootprints
My dog, normally well behaved, decided to jump into the fish tanks when we visited a fish farm. This is the same dog who flatly refused to swim in my own backyard pool.
EmeraldLight
I have painful memories of shin bruises and abruptly cleared off coffee tables while living with a pitbull 🤣
ivymantled69
Who let the dogs in? Who, who, who...
jappie348
Must be new her expecting guests to read something in front of their face
Shovi
I like the cut of their jib.
0570
I own such a tank, with a tail that only stops moving when he sleeps. I would not even dare ask if I can take him inside a shop with valuables that aren't bolted down.
NightOwlRally
Behind every notice/warning/safety briefing is a story. Usually funny, sometimes not.
adamlstf9
“Do not stop chainsaw using hands or genitals.”
BorderlineBunny
In this case I also suspect an expensive one.
laurapede83
I used to work overnight stocking at a pharmacy. When we would get bored we would read the warning labels on packages for fun. People do some crazy shit! Why anyone would ever put a suppository of any kind in their eye is beyond me.
guitarfourtysix
Decades ago, a friend worked for Johnson & Johnson as a customer service rep. She said a woman called complaining that the spermicide "medication" tasted so horrible she couldn't take it and it ruined her evening.
vicvalour
"Every safety rule is written in blood"
TlsGrz
Or in this case minerals
JoeT85
We learned about that in boot camp and it's not a pretty story
prosper020
My friend did airborne training many years ago. I still think about the story he told me where someone accidentally pulled the wrong cord at first and dropped their something like 100 lbs pack instead of opening their chute. They got their chute opened and landed fine, but their pack hit someone else’s chute below them, and that person plummeted to the ground. Idk what if any rules got written, but the story sticks with me 10+ years later and it’s just a story for me.
johnnyFartlek
Please moor your dog.
Snooj
Before riding it home.
johnblood616
The Moops!
IMustGrowUpReally
They're all good docks, Bront.
ReallyOG
What kind of tank dog is this?
ILikeFood2000
choppedliveraldente
*bink*
TheRicM
choppedliveraldente
The moors have entered the chat!
BananaForScaIe
Had malamutes. My big oafs only went into areas the size of barns. Or my pants (LYING ON THE FLOOR!).
LifeWouldBeEasyIfIWereEasyButLifeIsHardAndSoAmI
https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1YjB0Y2NjaHR5eWF0azNvdjIxbXA4dzk2cDZwdmFtdmY5YzQ2YmQ1NiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/l46Clec1DAnwsUL6g/200w.webp
choppedliveraldente
°_0
TheMurderousCricket
They should be asking if a breed is allowed in. Not "a dog".
KiwiGameDev
That seems like you’d immediately run into the same issues that we do when we try that with people (outside the obvious ethical ones). What constitutes the breed? What if mine is a cross? How much of a certain breed counts for the purposes of your rule. 50%? What if mine is bigger than average and a risk but is still on the “okay” breed list? What if I adopted my dog from a shelter and have no clue what breed it actually is? A tonne of weird questions which could result in confusion. Vs a height
pancreas
breeding in the shop is probably not allowed
ToenailClippingsJar
Yeah no.. I have two dogs, one a bit taller than the other, but it’s the slightly smaller one that will whack shit off the table with her tail. The big guy has a curled tail, it wags the width of his back. So no worries there.
A dog is a dog, whether it’s a yorkshire terrier or great dane. The yorkie might be small, but could potentially destroy everything up to about knee height, whereas a great dane.. well.. lol
CylensTheDiscourse
Why discriminate against certain breeds? "a dog" encompasses many different kinds. It doesn't matter the breed, what matters if it (and its tail) is big enough to do significant damage to its surroundings.
RyvaTheRenamon
Because dogs, unlike people, range from things you can literally put in a purse, or beasts that are larger than some people.
Dannyalcatraz
We’ve had a couple of border collies you’d swear had thagomizers on their tails. Certain knickknacks had to be elevated until they were geriatric.
Blackfinity
I knew that reference but had no idea Larson's gag-name ended up being used to name the anatomical feature IRL. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thagomizer
FortifiedWhine
Yes, scientists are nerds with senses of humour. As I recall, Gary Larson also coined "Anatidaephobia" which is the fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you and has a species of Lice named after him.
DietCokeIsMyDrugOfChoice
One of my favorite weird fact stories haha
TheGreatAtomsk
that's a reasonable request. danes can be derpy as fuck and have no concept of the reach and force of their tail. also the owner of of a big dog should be fully aware of that in the first place and not bring the dog to such places.
TheoreticalString
Dan
Gwenx
As a Dame i find this very rude! 😤😮💨
TheoreticalString
Danes? I think this is an Irish Wolfhound.
Feralkyn
The tallest dogs are now Great Danes in terms of records.
egoAristippos
🇩🇰 will also be offended
barbarian818
Most of my Mom's Danes never seemed to even know they had a tail. Big lovable dorks.
greymarch2000
You'd think
ForlornHopeful
As someone who's family owned a pair of Newfies I can totally relate to this
myfishtankiscoolerthanyours
Wood floor+newfie+anything fragile= this notice
asm80dfa8sdfj
You'd be surprised, it seems like owners of big dogs are just as oblivious as the dogs are to their size when in public.
JoeT85
I'm not a dog person, but I like the concept of dogs. The best thing about big dogs (in theory) is that they have no idea they're big dogs.
MadamPuddifoot
As someone who has be hot in the eye by a Dane tail: can confirm 😜
netutoring
My friend's Great Dane insisted it was either a lap dog or a puppy still. Sweetest, most imposing puppy ever:P
FortifiedWhine
Yeah the ones we had in doggy daycare were big enough to sit in your lap and keep both front paws on the ground. Basically backed up and just sat on you.
netutoring
He desperately tried to do that...but I was there to teach my friend's kid:P I had to make him sad.
DeltaBlast
Why would a dog need to go in a building? Aside from a guide dog, but those are trained to not break stuff anyway. I've never taken my dog inside anything like a store or museum or whatever.
Feralkyn
A lot of folks have dogs like family. It's not that it NEEDS to go anywhere; it's if you can take it, why not, instead of leaving them locked up at home?
In Europe, at least, dogs are typically welcome in a lot more places, and it's common for (WELL-BEHAVED) dogs to be out & about even in some shops. They're also welcome on public transport, so you'll have them on trains/trams etc.
Feralkyn
I think the only place I haven't seen them here/where they're not allowed is inside of restaurants (outside sections are fine) & in grocery stores for hygiene reasons.
IHaveGreatKittenRecipes
Some people are *really* into the 'my pet is my child' thing and insist on taking them EVERYWHERE. I've seen neurotic purse dogs yapping their skulls off at a HUMAN doctor's office. What the hell could you *possibly* need a non-service-animal PET in a doctor's office for? And it's super obvious when it's actually a trained companion VS 'mummy's speshul baby', lady, we can tell you shopped for the doc who wrote that ESA paperwork and that 'service animal' vest is cheap af on Amazon.
Einbrecher
There's not always a good place to tie them off outside. Then you're just sort of hoping nobody nicks them and/or does something stupid around them to get bit/etc. We've spent a ton of time/effort socializing our dogs, but there's always that random thing that sets them off that you didn't know about, and of course it's going to happen when you're not there. Had one dog who just went nuts at POC in wheelchairs. He was fine with POC, and fine with wheelchairs. But apparently, don't ever mix them.
thedill2000
As a big dog owner, I find nothing factually inaccurate.
pilomotor
Even if your horse is the size of a dog, you should not ride it. Dog spines aren't built to handle that kind of extra weight.
thedill2000
https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPWE1NzM3M2U1OGE4djkzMTc2N3RydXM1amhrcXI3eDk2ZWdibDNqZ2FmODhvYmk1bSZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/jXD7kFLwudbBC/200w.webp
pilomotor
It's possible to recognize a joke and also correct misinformation at the same time.