TroubledTimes
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If this is a reposr im terribly sorry. Let me know with a link and ill sauce. Havent seen alot of these before so i thought youd all enjoy.
LuciFern13
Hybris51129
Vicissitude
SirSockRock
TheBlackVan
10 points to Dumbledore
SpacerangerBuzzman
Fetus deletus.
hodorgoestomordor
gets me everytime
Applepotamus
muggle, plz
Standemonium
I imagine walking up to a urinal, I begin doing my thing, then hearing "GRYFFINDOR!!" screamed from the corner, scaring me into missing.
Mentallyhorsestable
I mean at least you're already peeing
nipitmundungus
My username goes well with this post :)
youroldfriend
xantha
the garbage shit boy.
UnemployedInGreenland
I always upvote #8 - I quote it all the time while running D&D.
Sensino
+1 for H. P. post, favorite for:
:D
BenSwol0
ghostharlequin
Not only this but I’m 90% sure that most of these events caused letters to be sent to parents/guardians informing them.
Blackout289
Snorting Hat
gifOfSamRockwellDancing
Anybody got a link to the dump with all the crazy Dumbledore tweets? That shit funny.
tachikaze316
#2 https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CpQmo5PWYAA3HH_.jpg Close enough.
missaroo
They needed a note to leave school grounds. All the other examples happened at school.
jamesdeanshat
Steve isn't really a last name. Good joke and ruined by poor execution. Maybe I'm bitter because I was sorted into Leibowitz house
hammersquirrel
#1 when you've been beating it relentlessly all weekend
ShifuYaku
I thought Harry was born in 1989...
ColoradoGirrl
1980 http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/Harry_Potter
ShifuYaku
Nice.
hodorgoestomordor
Nope. This year was "19 years later".
TypicalCanadianThatLikesMapleSyrup
EliMFrost
Anyone else thought #1 was floating?
JumperK
Truth be told, I thought it was from a ceramics class...
Troyificus
Well I do now...
ChobbleGobble
The best plot twist in history is Harry getting commended for disrespecting the local douche? That person needs to read more.
DahPrincess
Also, Slytherin would pick a lock and Ravenclaw would find the key
warick
Mcgonagall is the same teacher that caught him flying unsupervised and instead of punishing him, made him star of the team.
yunothink
#4 Can someone please explain this one to my friend?
hodorgoestomordor
First I was afraid, I was petrified. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBR2G-iI3-I
Nikaraptor
"-I was petrified" (I Will Survive song)
yunothink
Oooooh, thanks, and now I can't get that song from my head. So thanks again i guess.
StormheartKing
I get why they put it the way they did, but a Slytherin would pick the lock and a Ravenclaw would find the key. Lockpicking, while requiring
StormheartKing
"smarts" is the way more ambitious thing to do, while finding the key would be like solving a riddle.
StormheartKing
Rereading this, it's suddenly dawning on me why I'm still single.
DoomSkuller
Shouldn't Ravenclaw find the key and Slytherin pick the lock? finding the key takes smarts, or at least educated guesses.
ThatoneQuebecguywhothinkshesCanadian
I thought Slytherin might just blow the door down, seems easiest.
SnackMasterRanger
Or they could all use alohamora
FallingStar7669
I imagine it would be, like, they are presented with a locked door as a challenge to overcome. In that case, it's a simple mechanical issue.
TheGhostofElizabethShue
I think the assumption is the key belongs to someone else. Like there's probably murder involved.
DarkBadTheShameless
I thought the same thing
GeminiBattle
all: Use magic... you're wizards! Alohamora. open. BOOM Science... I mean magic!
Tmoneybags
Shouldn’t they all just say “Alohomora” to open it?
motherofwaggins
I agree!
Qualtagh
I thought Hufflepuffs were excellent finders...
PleasantPeasantPheasant
Yes but they're also kind enough to not break into your house unannounced.
LittleE92
Hufflepuffs-Find the key, Ravenclaws-Knock, Gryffindors-Kick it down, Syltherins- Pick the lock. At least how I would see it
Kensidian
Agreed, thought I feel like we should swap knock with Tries the handle
LittleE92
Ah yeah that would be better
DoomSkuller
Picking a lock is a dishonest task, and often a means for a dishonest end
calcifear
Eh, most lockpicking is done for sport or by locksmiths or to learn about how locks work. Could go either way.
ActionArmadillo
Yup. I'd also be fine with Slytherin "finding" the key.
ItCanOnlyBeANipple
I thought this. Also, a Ravenclaw would be Smart enough to knock first too, just in case someone answers..
TheSwedishCryptid
The password on Ravenclaw's door was riddles on the level of "What gets wetter the more it dries"
Ulthirm
I never leave my house without one.... you know for emergencies.
SomeRandomArsehole
Drunk Ravenclaw be like: "YOUR MUM!" *giggles, then throws up*
Wifwolf
A Ravenclaw would start with trying the door, just to test whether it was indeed locked.
0penname
They would probably go as far as inquire about the motive for entering. Learning whether or not they need to sneak.
Wifwolf
True, there would be a bombardment of questions to the door presenter. Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure.
BahamutBBob
#5 Also, there were thousands of them. He could have slyly stashed a few, instead of frantically grabbing one and running off with it.
SomeRandomArsehole
MsAlderaan
The real plot twist that gets Harry into Slytherin
ColoradoGirrl
Or you know opening his bedroom window so that they could have delivered it straight to his bedroom.
maohvixen
He lived in a literal closet/cupboard under the stairs... he didn’t have a window.
ColoradoGirrl
They moved him to the small bedroom upstairs before they tried to run for it.
kepler20c
You know what always bothered me? Parchment isn't wood pulp, it's animal skin. Vernon doesn't burn a thousand sheets of paper, he burns a
kepler20c
hundred sheep's worth of skin. Do you know how bad burning skin smells? It's death, and certainly not the type of smell that should be
kepler20c
coming from the home of a perfectly respectable, normal family like the Dursleys known for either having a miscreant nephew they care for,
kepler20c
or possibly for lying about the nice young nephew they abuse but nobody speaks up about. Either way I imagine that would be enough to earn
kepler20c
a visit from the police.