I'd love to see his family tree.

Sep 4, 2024 1:35 PM

cosonfused

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332980

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650

Dislikes

27

funny

Considering he is a mumble-talker, the background music isn't contributing here.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He also says he’s part Japanese. No doubt on his mother’s side. lol

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

has he officially emigrated to putin's boudoir yet?

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

He was once choked out by Gene LeBell and pooped himself.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Don't forget and don't forgive #nukesforukraine

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

His movies have become so terrible, the ONLY way they could be profitable is if they were a mechanism for Russian money laundering.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I would watch the shit out of his "Folding your Roots" episode.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

His voice sounds lot like Trump

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

The only thing we can say for sure is that he's 100% jabroni. (RIP, Iron Sheik)

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

his family tree is a circle

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

no. he is a father of his grandfather. and his grandfather is a father of his mother :)

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Classic Pretendian

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Pretty sure he’s 100% asshole.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Are you implying that pro-Putin idiots are compulsive liars and entirely unworthy of trust or respect?

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Dude sounds like Trump…

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

It’s like he was the sponsor for ancestry.com. 😂

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

You know considering my genetics are just as mixed... a 23andMe test makes perfect sense.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The Behind the Bastards podcast has a great episode on this nutjob.

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/behind-the-bastards/id1373812661?i=1000421926086

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

23and me says I’m half Mongol and half Viking(Norwegian). Seagal is half douche and half ballsack

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

This level of confusion reminds me of trump’s

2 years ago | Likes 32 Dislikes 3

It aint confusion. He's simply lying to fit whatever situation he's in. When in his new country of Russia, he's "Russian Mongolian", when ginning up bullshit for of his 'movies' he's Mohawk or whatnot. It's all just a lie to fit the circumstance

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Also, the cadence of speech.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Was thinking the same thing, especially in the last clip.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Bullshit

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Well, he is the master of Bullshido!

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That was like trying to listen to Trump. Stream of conscience that I can hardly follow because it's such a jumble

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

In the last Seagal movie I saw, he spent 90% of the movie sat down. He even did a fight scene while sat in a chair. And when his character had to run down some stairs, they used a stuntman.

2 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I'd almost admire that grift, if it were from someone with charisma. Like Samuel L. Jackson, I'd accept that from him.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

It was so bad. It wasn't even comically bad. Just bad.

2 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Oh, come on! It takes a lot of skill to go so fatly around corners.

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Hey Steven…

2 years ago | Likes 85 Dislikes 0

What's not to believe? His mother is half of everything and his dad was.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

DUDE... he's gonna sissy slap you like a million times!

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

I lost all respect after his involvement in the AI Carlin debacle.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Will Sasso's impressions were always great. Loved his Robert de Niro.

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

the ice cream parlour bit was hilarious https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ocNLcg_IFA

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Kenny Rogers too.

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

v

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

If he -really- wanted to know, DNA testing is a thing. I think he likes his stories though.

2 years ago | Likes 54 Dislikes 0

He can also (hire someone to) research his father's side and verify that "found in a shoebox" story.

2 years ago | Likes 19 Dislikes 0

His paternal lineage seems to be well established by genealogy records — he’s got Russian Jewish blood.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I'm pretty sure they use saliva samples, not fecal matter.

2 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

A Wikipedia search and an ancestry.com account would be enough

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

He is a braggart, a pathological liar, pro-Russian and a lover of dictatorships... I don't understand how it is possible that he hasn't already been chosen in a top role for a possible Trump administration.

2 years ago | Likes 444 Dislikes 5

he can't get up off the chair

2 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Unfortunately, there's only room for one washed up actor in that cabinet.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Idk he said he's been a genealogist for the last 87 years I'm sure he'd be able to explain this. /s

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

He talks exactly like him!

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He was, he’s near Putin

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

he hasn't been given pardon and is in hiding for his human trafficking charges

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He is hiding in Russia to avoid prison for tax evasion.

2 years ago | Likes 45 Dislikes 0

You forgot narcissist. ALL his movies are total power fantasies where he has a cool job, bangs 20 year olds, win every single fight without being hit and shoots guns.

2 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

He’s busy with his current appointments in the Putin administration.

2 years ago | Likes 21 Dislikes 0

Not to mention a habitual sexual harasser

2 years ago | Likes 65 Dislikes 0

the real reason he only works in eastern europe now.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

And most likely never acquired any actual martial arts training

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

And rapist

2 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

and occasional pants-shitter.

2 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

thats the most relatable thing about him tbh

2 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Kinda wish the clips had been in chronological order

2 years ago | Likes 149 Dislikes 1

I kinda wish I could have those 50 seconds back.

2 years ago | Likes 76 Dislikes 0

Finders keepers.

2 years ago | Likes 37 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

I love to laugh at his movie reviews. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gkXbDEgYSNo

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I just watched this entire thing. Seagal is so unintentionally hilarious.

2 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That youtuber has reviews on all of his movies so enjoy.

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I hope you’ve seen him sing “I want the poonani”

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I haven't seen it, but I heard it. Yes everyone, he put out an ALBUM!

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

does anyone else smell burnt toast?

2 years ago | Likes 71 Dislikes 0

You might be having a stronk

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I think YOU might be no hot chocolate

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nicked my thought right out of my head

2 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Call the bondulance

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

2 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0