I feel wrong...

I feel wrong...

I was just told that my grandfather passed away a few hours ago. Of course, it was expected, he's been in a coma for days. I can't help but believe he is the reason my family is so dysfunctional and torn. I am, in a way, happy he's gone.
But I feel guilty.
After years of my dad telling me that his father was a monster, I'm relieved he's gone. I miss my Nana terribly, and I barely knew her. Again, he was so terrible to her, so abusive, my father thinks that's what sparked her Alzheimer's. I will never forgive him for any of the shit he's given my family, so why do I feel so bad for not grieving?