msawers
127755
1796
44
Needed to use the John a little earlier than normal. The water was still blue, no dribbles on the seat, toilet paper reloaded... Great start to a shity day!
Aug 1, 2019 11:39 AM
msawers
127755
1796
44
Needed to use the John a little earlier than normal. The water was still blue, no dribbles on the seat, toilet paper reloaded... Great start to a shity day!
SKIDTURD
Or a shitty start to a great day?!
TechnicallyRight
@OP The 11am Blue Water Special is one of the eight wonders of the world. Comes with 100% guaranteed cool seating.
gelvy
Don't ymou mean a shitty start to a great day?
Odyssey9
Dude, yo, OP, I wish I was there to hug you. This is a good omen.
Kjelstad
Have a good one, partner.
mikenaulls
Now wreck it
FloodingWaters
The only acceptable use of "first post!"
hardytardigrade
"That Flush When"?
pinhero
If you double click the image, it tells you exactly where to sit your ass. Useful.
Damngoodstuff
More like a shitty start to a great day, am I right?
koops
lindabelchersfirstcousin
BEST feeling
jbonsaipics
What's everyone obsession with pooping multiple times a day at work! Everyday at my office everytime I go in there are like 3 people pooping
grantavius
That or a smurf pissed in it.
Carp46120
I bought a new toilet seat for a remodel. Took it out of the box and it was broken and really nasty. I took it back and made them destroy 1/
richa90311
Had that today! Awesome...
abeigor
Great shit to a starty day!
HsuDoNihm
Great start to a shit.
DrBoatyMcBoatface
Ugh, that is so fucking hot. I would paint that thing every shade of brown.
Xen300
Why is there a massive gap in the seat?
Nanoxt
And where is the lid?
Kennytarmac
TimeFoDat
You look at it with a Grinch-like smile and say, "Oh you're naughty aren't you? I'm gonna have to teach you a LESSON!"
zsnever
Where’s the face?
msawers
Y’all got it wrong... TFW is “That Feel When” where MFW is “My Face When”
zsnever
My bad
miskatonichiker
You won the toilet lottery. You can’t win if you don’t play.
Tvtr
He hardly won the toilet lottery if he has to shit in a stall with a 60cm gap on each side
msawers
Agreed, you should see the gap on the door...
buttwheek
Actually um I piss blue so....
StarscreamAndHutch
Might I recommend a visit to your doctor?
ceemars
King George III pissed blue. Probably those pesky colonies what did it to 'im.
FeloniousMonk13
I like to piss all over the seat but then wipe it in very lightly, so the next person sits down and wonders why it feels a little damp...
Serkus
I hope you stub your toe
FelixTheCAT5e
TFW? Are you a toilet?
msawers
So I always took it as “That Feel When” where MFW is “My Face When”... maybe I’m wrong
Allworknoplay82
The only thing worse than a cold toilet seat is a warm toilet seat.
TwoBitGreaser
Ghost cheeks
firestarters
You clearly haven’t been to Japan ?
TimeFoDat
No, it's worse when somehow the person managed to splatter shit in so many places there are crusty pieces of seat cover stuck to the seat.
ComradeZoidberg
That depends on what caused the warming.
Allworknoplay82
Probably the melting ice caps.
Kbantar
Because of the implication.
ArmedandOverclocked
i'm the only guy at work. Having a defacto private bathroom rocks.
ThatHappensToMeSometimes
I’m lucky because I’m the only girl at the office. No one else’s ass touches that seat but mine!
Xedi22
We had a problem with a (suspected) creepy dude leaving a pube on the seats during overnight. But he died in a car crash and it stopped.
BklynPunisher
That all depends on if there is an overnight shift. I worked at a building that had few female employees but some guy would use the ...
BklynPunisher
... ladies room on the midnight shift. They found out when he forgot to take his dirty magazine after he was “done”
imonewiththeforceandtheforceiswithme
The absolute best feeling is getting a new toilet. Knowing that your ass is the first to touch that seat. Hnnnnng
KiloElectronVolt
I don't know why more people don't do this. At LEAST get a new seat, but I put 4 brand new toilets in..... For $320 bucks... It's amazing.
WillAlwaysUpvoteTAWOG
http://giphygifs.s3.amazonaws.com/media/EfkhltP1fcZGM/giphy.gif
Shewy92
What happens when you sit down it is warm like someone else was sitting on it even though it's new and you live alone?
hydrocarbon82
Plot twist, the seat was swapped off the old...
Goblor
At my old job my department had different shifts so the company got new cars for our shift. Was the first shift to get to use it Was driven0
Imfromvenusapparently
I went to a Five Guys and needed a wee. Cleaner came out as I got there and the toilet was clean. I actually sat on the seat, it was nice.
cubsfanman22
phonoodle415
But the standard checklist before selling a toilet seat is to let an NFL linemen sit on it first bare naked after a game
Yesisaidthat
Im the only guy on my floor, I see blue every day.
Nightcaste
Toilet companies do a 1000-ass test on every seat.
WarwickPuckerson
I fear that unless you're literally the person to install it, you arent the first person
gatofeo
So no born again toilets?
heisenbug42
First thing I do when I install one is take a crap.
Beezlebubble
Go further. Build it. Use it. Sell it.
howToLoseTheGame
Nope, developers build it then shits in it. The QA takes a dump multiple times.
roguishdrummer
That's why I wait until 30 minutes after the housekeeper cleans the restrooms. Everyone's gone and I get a clean toilet.
Talligan
Feeling that virgin water splash up and tickle your angel hole. It's a magical feeling, bringing you closer to God
Lovethesmelloftoastedsourdoughbread
"angel hole" lol
KibblesandBitchTits
Poseidon's fresh morning breath
ParadoxicalSheep
Oh, ew, gross. I love it
KibblesandBitchTits
Thanks I thought it was kinda clever
girlsomewhere
If i was a contractor or plumber is be sure you shit in every new toilet i installed.. Just for this reason. Plop plop wooosh bitches!
Lunazaak
nono. the best feeling is knowing you're the one who cleaned it, so it's absolutely spotless & you get to be the one to mess it up
StonesOnTheHill
As a cleaner, I always use one of the employee toilets the moment I'm done cleaning it. Perks of the job.
StonesOnTheHill
Prima pooptis, if you will.
msawers
Closest I got to that was being the first person in an apartment. I bet the construction workers go there before me though...
WithNothingBetterToDo
Yes, i do this all the time. Your new toilet is never really new. Never.
KiloElectronVolt
You are the most correct.... Hung over, energy drink fueld, reheated spicy Mexican, Explosive powered construction worker shits.
Cutwail
Loled how true it is.
IPoopOnCompanyTime
Am construction worker, can confirm. See username
manslut
I'm so turned on right now
amorgan1
The first thing I say on a construction site...”this thing flush yet?”
HelicopterDickFlightschoolStudent
Closest thing is being the last one in OP's mom, much recommend
LostGiraffe
Found the virgin
HelicopterDickFlightschoolStudent
And that boys and girls is the time the internet dunked on me... goodnight
TheRealFireFrenzy
no you didn't he fucked OPs mom cant you read?
squeeks32
Found the virgin who found fellow virgin
LostGiraffe
Wait you mean it doesn't count if it's with your cousin?