johnpetrucci
112238
2642
45
Jan 29, 2019 9:25 AM
johnpetrucci
112238
2642
45
clandevort
I just got why donkey Kong’s rival is a giant reptile
mofreckle
King Kong can hold tools. just you wait, there will be a scene if him wielding 2 Apache helicopters like fucking uzis
gjm147
He's a fucking ape not a monkey and this is exactly the kind of thing that gets biplane pilots killed.
QuazMasta
"wait there's gonna be...", except there already IS a King Kong vs Godzilla movie...Darn Youths.
Vergenbuurg
...now, if it were Shin Godzilla, Kong would be totally fucked.
jamandtoast
This is why they made a point to say Kong is still growing and they have no idea how big he'll get in Skull Island.
sYferaddict
It doesn't matter how big they are, one of them is going to yell "MARTHA" and they'll make friends and go beat up Jesse Eisenberg.
sonof
Laxeey
Seriously Godzilla can be hit by a meteor and not even be scratched but king kong is can be harmed by planes. How is this a fair fight?
AsianLeprechaun
But can Godzilla throw poop? Checkmate atheists.
lawideas
Gonna be? - "King Kong vs. Godzilla" came out in 1962.
Tchae
tygerpsimatrix
DIOsleftNip
going to be DK vs King Krool
SkigginUSA
JosephCraftHD
Apparently the King Kong from the recent movie was really young. In the Godzilla vs King Kong movie, he’ll allegedly be much larger.
ArgonSpark
And he's already much larger the previous Kongs.
kkanne20
godzilla would turn king kong into a fuckin meat skewer in about one second
bopbopdop
King Kong will beat Godzilla using guerrilla warfare tactics.
tnin4u
You say Godzilla's bulletproof like King Kong's gonna start shooting him.
thisgoesto11
Don't even get me started on when Godzilla fought a giant flammable MOTH and they decided the moth should win.
whitter86
But what about godzuki
assroar7
Then the winner faces Gypsy Danger in the finals.
Usstiberiusk
Bring in the Iron Giant, that’ll show ‘em
Alkuam2
"Gypsy danger is analog."
tygerpsimatrix
"That's... not how that works"
washout
[Imgur](
v)
LordofSandvich
oh that's what people are referencing
benzack1
The current king Kong is gonna be about the same size as Godzilla (100+ feet). We also see he is a quick thinker and able to weaponize thing
Begotten
Godzilla is like 400+ feet tall now in the Bryan Cranston universe
benzack1
Forgot to mention they said Kong in the skull island movie was still developing and will get way bigger.
Begotten
That will just make it harder for him to avoid being roasted by Godzilla fire
ninjaguineapig
He's an ape
MuffNinja
No, he is monky.
OddHominem
That's a very fuzzy distinction. Apes are dry-nosed primates, aka dry-nosed monkeys. Also, apes and Old World monkeys share a common ...
OddHominem
ancestor who was a .... ? If that ancestral species were still alive, we'd classify it as an Old World monkey. And since you can never ...
OddHominem
really evolve out of higher taxa, birds are still dinosaurs. Wait, that's a different debate.
CarnackiArdent
It's more that "monkey" is paraphyletic. Old World monkeys are more closely related to apes than New World monkeys, but I'm not sure the 1/
CarnackiArdent
most recent common ancestor of apes and OWMs would itself be an OWM? Five minutes of wikipedia research seems to suggest apes branched 2/
CarnackiArdent
off first but I'd have to do more in-depth research to be certain. Basically for any reasonable description of a monkey clade apes are 3/
CarnackiArdent
also monkeys, because the monkey clade would include *all* simians in such a definition.
kangdangguychoi
Calling it now, Kong is going to overwhelm Godzilla but before he strikes the killing blow... Martha.
funnystoryaboutthat
Damn you +1
ElbowDeepinaTinyOctopus
I think you mean "Mothra" don't you?
ShegorathDarkLordOfKittens
Whoosh
kangdangguychoi
Fuck me. This is better.
ButIBuildAThousandBridges
No man he's joking about Batman Vs Superman
ZerkaiZerkai
r/woosh
GlobularCloyster
What’s a king to a god? What’s a god to a non believer?
LeJoop
Godzilla is a cold blooded animal. Throw him in the water and he will get cold and sluggish.
Roclocks102
But Godzilla comes from the ocean...?
LeJoop
Global warming.... I'm telling you that shit will kill us!
Leetri
Godzilla is literally fueled by nuclear power, water only makes him run cooler and more efficiently.
TerminalGear
This is the reason why Godzilla spends long periods of time sleeping on the ocean floor.
FaithAlone
Clearly humans will build King Kong a mech suit for him to pilot to fight Godzilla. Thats the movie I want to watch.
Begotten
Interesting idea. Godzilla already killed 2 flying mech monsters at the same time in the 2014 movie tho.
FaithAlone
I am talking about a gorilla mech that shoots bananas and uses giant barrels in combat all piloted by a giant gorilla. That is what I want.
Begotten
Shut up and take my money
AgentTempest
It's easy guys: what's better, a king or a god?
MisterTangerineMan
Or a kong
DiogenesPendergast
So basically it's evolution vs creationism the film
Bilboteebaggins
Shaggy
Hutchy01
Depends on the kind of king, a constitutional monarch would be worse but a religious king like a Pope or Caliph might be better.
highteck9
ok eminem.
Imonimgurtoomuch
What’s a god to a non believer?
Slackhammock
https://media2.giphy.com/media/mWu4th31HNRss/giphy.gif
AgentTempest
I understand to which song you are referring
ScrobbleMasterGeneral
A giant moth
Skelliton
Giant lämp.
SpearLikeNut
A very high electricity bill
DoingItWrongSince1980
IAmTheBeachIWorship
They had a very odd idea of what the Persians were like
Killeronice
A god-king it is!
assroar7
Scissors me Xerxes! Scissors me!
Weedmoney
Why be a king if you can be a god?
CoBr2
In fairness, we call him Godzilla, but his actual Japanese name is Gojira, which was combo of gorilla and whale (kujira). He’s gorilla whale
CoBr2
Not God lizard like we call him. So it’s giant gorilla vs gorilla whale.
Cyractacus
No Gods or Kings, Only Man.
FalconPunchingHitler
What is a king to a god?
g3istbot
What's a god to a non-believer, who don't believe in, anything.
FalconPunchingHitler
Ah, this guy gets it
fluhatinrapper
No church in the wild.
ParradoxUniverse
What is a god, to a non believer?
fluhatinrapper
Who don't believe in, anything.
pumasocks
*Cue instrumental*
GetSchwifty2036
*super saiyan scream*
SleppyLeBo
r/unexpectedDBZA
AllHailTrumPutiNaMo
A king. You can kill a king. It's difficult to kill something imaginary unless you're Florida man.
bobbynixon
Wouldn’t that make a God better then?
trollprozac
Ouch. That edge!
Pbtibma
I killed 3 on the way to work this morning.
AllHailTrumPutiNaMo
So, playing GOW or are you from Florida?!
Pbtibma
From Florida
MrSaturday
I am so sorry.
bicuriositykilledthiscat
King Kong has opposable thumbs, the ability to move quickly, and can climb large things.
Alecchi
So you're saying we need to make king kong sized weapons to make it a fair fight.
Inarticulated
Kong's gonna scale Godzilla's back & fucking stab out the eyes with his opposable thumbs because Godzilla can't even reach for it's own head
SkinnerTBD
is kong made of flesh? godzilla is going to nuclear flame roast his ass.
MalcomReynoldsWrap
This probably describes someone's sex life.
Enigmastick
Godzilla has survive a meteor crashing on it.
Begotten
Godzilla seemed to have opposable thumbs and ability to grab things in the 2014 movie
onecowboytoo
Yeah, well I have and opposable penis. All the women are opposed to touching it.
ElbowDeepinaTinyOctopus
Godzilla also has opposable thumbs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYVuAlNeF2U (~1:40)
Necropoledancer
So does a toddler, still wouldn't bet it'd beat a salt water crocodile
bicuriositykilledthiscat
I never said it would beat Godzilla:) But it is possible and logical that he’d put up enough of a fight for there to be a movie. Plus, /1
bicuriositykilledthiscat
I’ve had 4 toddlers.. they can just exhaust you to death?
Necropoledancer
If they're making a movie, plot armour will ensure he puts up a fight.
bakingPretzels
Perfect for quickly climbing up on Godzilla and shoving thumbs into it's eyes
Radix865
KotimainenKayttajanimi
Eat your greens, bitch!
MeanMisterClean
birch
Vergenbuurg
AllHailTrumPutiNaMo
Fake news. He has the high ground.
danescrossing
so did darth maul, look what happened to him.
edg01234
PraiseTitties
But....Godzilla literally shoots a big fuck you lazer shoot out of his mouth. I think I rather have that than opposable thumbs. Ya'mean
LadyNetrex
Dude, atomic breath. Get it right!
thecontractor
Thank you
bicuriositykilledthiscat
Godzilla has limited head movement though. A side to side sweeping laser should be avoidable by a quick, smart primate. The point is that /1
bicuriositykilledthiscat
it’s closer a fight than people realize.
goatamon
It really really isn’t. That’s the reason filmmakers scale up Kong a fuckload from the original.
bicuriositykilledthiscat
He doesn’t have to be scaled up and I never said he’d win, just that it wouldn’t be over quick. The real Godzilla movies are of a slow- /1
AlexSomething
But King Kong can fling shits the size of trucks. Now That's a weapon !
SkinnerTBD
kong climbs skyscrapers. godzilla is the size of skyscrapers.
AllHailTrumPutiNaMo
Meaning Kong is gonna climb Godzilla to make Kongzillas?!
SkinnerTBD
goatamon
Yes, and a human being also has opposable thumbs, is surprisingly agile and strong, but you still wouldn’t bet on the man in an unarmed
goatamon
fight against a 20 foot crocodile.
Arracor
Shit dude, depends on the man.
Abrausedteleprot
unless that human is Steve Erwin, of course
bicuriositykilledthiscat
I never said I was betting on a Kong victory though. Just that it’s at least plausible that Kong could fight Godzilla long enough for it /1
bicuriositykilledthiscat
to make a decent movie out of. Those that think Godzilla would just immediately zap his ass forget the advantages that Kong has.
UnpopularOpinionPuffinPersonified
Why unarmed? In a survival match where anything goes and each one is just trying to survive, I'd take a human over croc ANY day.
goatamon
Because the comparison is Kong vs. Godzilla, and Kong doesn’t use monkey rocket launchers or poison.
UnpopularOpinionPuffinPersonified
Kong is an ape. We can therefore impart ape intelligence vs. reptile intelligence into the equation. Ape has advantage there.