yourmomloveme
86054
741
63
Happy birthday to me!
Edit: Thank you guys!
Aug 19, 2017 4:10 AM
yourmomloveme
86054
741
63
Happy birthday to me!
Edit: Thank you guys!
amoxikillin
I honestly don't know. He has zero social media presence that I'm aware of. He deleted his fb in like 2008.
Piornet
He's a recovering drug addict who helps other recovering drug addicts in one of the worst heroin addicted counties in the US. 9" dick tho.
Sithlordofnachos
Bet that sucked the going in first.
Leinkugel
Someday I'll find out who and when I do, I'll fuck their brains out.
Terwin94
Best of luck to you on that one! Make sure he or she is clean and use protection.
Diverge
Uncle Dave? Still in prison i think
morningxafter
I have no idea. I was 11, she was 12. Lost track of her when we moved out of the trailer park.
tedcrilly
It's like love story
Jollytothegreen
Still Better than twilight
FelixtheEngine
Married her. We've been together for 34 years. :)
JeffGoldbum
Who is down voting this? And why? Congrats man, that's a beautiful thing you've got going on.
boneh3ad
She's still in our home town, probably wrecking some other dude's emotional stability.
OldDickSlap
She's married with like 5 kids. She's really happy from what I can tell, so good for her. Feel like I dodged a bullet anyway though.
CharlieBronsonsfloppyphallusfight
I reckon married with like 5 kids isn't for everybody.
jkancil
YOU! You're the person
Wextersmachinegunhands
Are you winking?
jkancil
Yes I am. Thanks. Glad you played it so cool
yourmomloveme
SickLikeMe187
Still attached to my right arm :p
yourmomloveme
mysticryane
He got married to the perfect girl for him, had another kid, and is pretty damn happy. And I couldn't be happier for him
uselessninja
TheAxeNinja
Cancun. I'll pick her up tomorrow from the airport
thevortexmaster
Not a frigin clue.
highevolutionary
Just across the street. We gon do it again.
boevis
Probably in jail
badgersbadgerswedontneednostinkinbadgers
Dead :/
Cmap008
Yup. Me too. Suicide is a bitch.
LincolnSiixEcho
Take it easy on the next one, will ya
badgersbadgerswedontneednostinkinbadgers
Hahaha! Yeah, hoping to marry the one I'm with now.
LincolnSiixEcho
badgersbadgerswedontneednostinkinbadgers
Omg, this is so perfect! She loves RuPaul's Drag Race!
pandagrrl
Same :( <3
Shelbyfr
Same. Suicide
badgersbadgerswedontneednostinkinbadgers
Damn, sorry to hear that. I just lost one of my oldest friends to suicide as well.
LeahShine88
Also same. :(
rezpawner
You lucky bastard. My ex is still alive.
RexNihil
The last I heard, she was boning my former roommate, who happened to be my mother's ex boyfriend. It was a strange time.
Internetuser666
Small town
Krisanthemum
Same. My first ended up being my only. 6.5 years and counting.
TooManyPixels
My virginity take is married to the guy i thought she was cheating on me with. They have a kid too! Super super for them!
bobnot
Thought?
TooManyPixels
Cheating confirmed
Kennytarmac
yourmomloveme
bobnot
Username checks oit
morgan0073
Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
RexNihil
No drugs involved on my part...not sure about their's, though.
SkeuomorphicallyInclined
I looked her up a decade ago. Doing fine. married. Seemed happy.
tryall
She's single, traveling the world, and I've got a kid with the love of my life. We're both happy, even though the breakup was.. turbulent
bunny808
She's at work.
saltycorpsman
across the sea with my son while im stationed in japan
SecretlySkeletonHitler
Username checks out
r1017x
He's 10 minutes away from me, after I flew over here to visit him, and he told me yesterday morning that he has feelings for someone else.
SecretlySkeletonHitler
D:
IamEasilyDistracte
I love my so I really do but I've began feeling for another. It's not something I want but it's happened and I don't know what to do bout it
mangosplashies
Rough..
123345567789
yourmomloveme
@r1017x Im sorry for him
r1017x
It's alright I'm gonna ruin his chances with the other girl
drinkup4
She's in the next room, after 25 years of marriage she won't sleep with me anymore.
QueenAmy
I hope you just mean sleep
yourmomloveme
Noob3rts
What?
abrakadumbass
he farts in his sleep. she couldnt deal with it anymore
KABARU
I had a professor once tell me separate rooms saved their marriage.
perfectbosom
I read that separate beds aren't always good, but separate duvets? Yes.
MethelyneBlue
My husband and I have separate duvets. Shit helps yo.
drinkup4
It makes sleeping better. Especially since she goes to work at 4 am and to be at 9 pm.
IHaveAPizzaTrampolineSecret
still stripping at the rusty bucket off of route 66... if you ever visit the joint ask for "rocket" and say you want a "texas screwdriver"
englishdoyouspeakitmotherfucker
Is this like that time it was suggested that I ask for a Dirty Sanchez?
yourmomloveme
CrankyCook
Taliska
I am both terrified and intrigued?...
atmac
"Texas Screwdriver"? Does it come with a complimentary tattoo if you can ride it for 8 seconds?
89cupcakes
Last I heard she moved to Germany. Hope she gets herpes. Thats right Gloria, I'm talking about you...whore!
goatfkersdidnothingwrong
Gloria the glory hole?
yourmomloveme
sweetdreamsaremadeofupvotes
Yeah! Fuck Gloria
introvertedmamabear
Not if she gets those herpes
Irnt
Damn right!
NoSwervin
Dead. Brain cancer.
SecretlySkeletonHitler
D:
Steelhart
Married the guy she cheated on me with, divorced and then married the guy she cheated on him with. The Wheel is unbroken.
Clayman8
Funny. Its exactly what i expect my ex to do as well.
th1841
Exact same situation for me, just different gender. He even knocked up both women he cheated with. A real winner, that one.
Nalianna
... introduce them to one another
nation543
The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills.
galsfer06
As a non english speaker this took me some time (+ i just woke up). While with you, girl fucks another guy. Marries him. Cheats with a 3rd..
JamesonStreet
As a native English speaker, reading it made my brain hurt.
leechdemon
As a native English Speaker, thanks for your walk-through. +1
galsfer06
..man. Divorces 2nd guy. Marries 3rd guy. Godammm this woman is insane!!!
Steelhart
Yup. That she is. But I don't hate her, I am glad for it. Made me into the man I am today. I'm happily married and have a little kid. :)
Phantom0808
Mine married the guy she cheated with, she has breakdowns and sends really long miserable FB messages. Hates her life, im happy its great.
WellWellWellLookWhoItIs
Why haven't you blocked her on Fb?
Phantom0808
I do every time she creates a new accountadds and messages me its funny at this point
zeromig
The schadenfreude is too delicious.
Toastergeist
Idk. I just hope everything goes good for her. She was always a super nice person. I mean she banged me, right?
Toastergeist
goes well* I'm my own grammar white nationalist
sayitthreetimes
He's right by my side snoring like a motherfucker
ShireBagginss
Same.
GoochoLibre
Same! :3
TheHappieMe
Mine too, hahaha!
123345567789
Same same!
080080
it's sweet that you still live with your dad.
Vrim
Jesus....
RiddSann
relationship goal right there
kanybal
Well, frankly, same for me (mine is actually putting up a shelf in the next room), but it was never a goal, it just happened. It's ok to -
kanybal
have other experiences before, I kinda regret I never did sometimes (but it's absolutely no reason to break up or cheat)
RiddSann
My ex broke up with me, I helped her not feel too guilty by saying I didn't see myself finishing with my first... I regret it so much
kanybal
No reason why you should... She wouldn't have stayed because she felt bad, and even if she had, it wouldn't be for the right reasons
Mach30ThatsFasterThanMostPlanesCanGo
Are you a mother?
MrDurden93
LIKE a motherfucker.
JiggleWigglepp
I find your comment humerus
Solivoid
And I found yours hummus.
squreky
Know the feeling, except she grinds her teeth
sayitthreetimes
I have a mouth guard and I can't go to sleep without it. It's awesome!
mwppmarauders
Bf and I are both tooth grinders. Get your lady a mouth guard! It'll save her teeth.
squreky
I've tried to buy her some but she refuses. Oh well
heidimark
Have her ask her dentist. The custom ones are much better feeling than the store bought ones. And seriously, it will save her teeth!
mwppmarauders
Agreed. Mine is formed to my teeth.
DavidBennettisntmyrealname
Still hasn't occurred :P
DevoKevo
SarminBandit
merr916
Forget what other people say, wait for the right time for you. It changes the way you think, not always in a good way. don't feel pressured!
Evern
Absolutely. And desperation is not attractive, that was something I had to stress to my guy friends a lot in our 20's. You have time.
hihellobyeoh
Ffs I'm 24, still can't get laid, and I'm already an uncle... I need to lose weight too, time to dig through my favorites to find that post.
merr916
Well I guess you can use this time to make yourself Mr.Right so when Mrs. Right comes along you'll be ready and have the pick of the litter!
DugaDoug
I'm also 22, never had a relationship, a uncle, and as of last week the last single person I know. I could lose some weight as well.
Troldann
In 10 years, you could end up like me! Which is basically you, but ten years older.
merr916
Try not to compare yourself to others though. There's a time for everyone for everything. Don't let it get you down. Confidence is sexy!!
DavidBennettisntmyrealname
Yeah, I gotta hit the gym as well... But I'm down 5 pounds so far, so I'm 1/10 the way to my goal :D
yourmomloveme
DavidBennettisntmyrealname
Lol, I'm only 20 XD
HanseP
Tellcerseiitwasme
DavidBennettisntmyrealname
I'm also not that attractive and no one's ever shown any interest, so doubt it'll happen any time soon :/
Tellcerseiitwasme
TIMoonShine
I know a Dave Bennett from the UK, but since that's not your real name, must not be you. ◎_◎
Darkfiyr
Hey same, feelsbadman. At lest alcohol likes me
yourmomloveme
HanseP
Blue oyster bar will sort you out ;*
Justarandomgiffairy
I'd volunteer, similar age same situation, but you sound too self assured. It'd never work.
Justarandomgiffairy
Also I just creeped on your profile and since you're a gay man I don't see it working too well. Me being a woman and all.
Solivoid
I'm saying this in general, given the topic: I never understood why people have a passion, a longing for something, yet remain passive ab/it
Solivoid
/2 Even if someone says "I'm unattractive"...There's the gym, there are other qualities, like talents or money. There's a way around it.
Solivoid
/4 For me, that's like seeing a fat person who's longing for a fit body, yet never actually work out. Is it that the issue is too direct? eh
Solivoid
/3 I was shit with socializing with people, so I naturally started drawing, to attract them. It so happened I eventually got good at it.