My story of emotional abuse

My husband and I were married at the end of September. A few weeks before, I received a Facebook message from a woman telling me she and my now husband had been in an on-going relationship for nearly a year. She included screenshots of texts from him saying he was going to end it with me in order to give their relationship a real chance. When I confronted him about it he said he had no real feelings for her but he was terrified of marriage and wanted to know he wasn't trapped. Charmer. He comes from a family of liars who act like they do it to protect one another so honesty had been an ongoing issue in our relationship. We've been together for 6 years and he was so manipulative and emotionally abusive that by the time I found out about his cheating, my first instinct was that I did something wrong or I wasn't good enough to be with him. I genuinely believed it was a phase because of the pressure and I ACTUALLY APOLOGIZED TO HIM for putting too much pressure on him during the wedding planning. He has repeatedly undermined my career goals and life plans by arguing until I agree that those feelings are irrational. He only cooks, cleans, and plans for himself but if I don't include him in a decision he would make me feel like garbage for being selfish. I attempted suicide once and he yelled at me for an hour about how selfish I was and how distracted he would be at work because he has to worry about my safety.
Lesson: saying all of this to strangers helps me see how bat shit crazy it sounds. But when you're with someone as manipulative as my husband you make every excuse to ignore it. You say you're crazy and selfish and think of every nice thing they've ever done to make up for the horrible person they are. But what I've learned is it's never too late to walk away. Yes I wish I would have had the self esteem to leave before getting married but at least I realize it now and I'm seeking help. I may have had a shorter marriage than Kim K but I cannot describe the relief of knowing that I'm not crazy and I am worth loving.
I know this will die in usersub but I'm sharing for anyone who is stuck in the pit I've been in for years. You deserve love.