franknstincmplx
128206
3150
77
Thoughts on the coffin bed?
FP edit: you all apparently have really rowdy sex given the comments.
Dec 12, 2018 3:16 PM
franknstincmplx
128206
3150
77
Thoughts on the coffin bed?
FP edit: you all apparently have really rowdy sex given the comments.
nextgenpants
Dahir Insaat is just a bat shit crazy- "start up"? That might be the correct term. Weird, impossible CGI bullshit that no one will invest in
HitandRyan
I saw a mocking review of this. Apparently air vents on Death Bed are optional.
Diggitydigdigs
It locks the person in right? Kinda like a giant metal coffin that’s comfy inside?
Shishoka
After days of isolation I still have not died. Not much time left. I only wish I could warn people that dying in the earthquake is better.
SovietPlays
Ah, yes, hell bed, my favorite
Maharajmeister
New word for you Americans- “sarcophagus”
Frodosynthisis
or just a coffin sarcophagus were used for egyptian royalty
OkButWhyWereTheyFilming
Nothing like the thought of being sealed in your own coffin to make you rest easy at night.
KillerGymSox
Go Team Venture!
LateNightBunnyParty
My thoughts exactly!
Bunuslippur
You think my claustrophobic ass is going to survive in there?
Excludos
It's unbelievable how fast you're temporarily cured of claustrophobia when the alternative is straight up death..
shakedownblues
With supplies, motherfucker
BlueSpaceLizard
No sunrise, motherfucker
KanzenChowa
I want one to escape my in laws
aPokal
Or your kids in the morning.
DiracsDelta
The mimics are getting clever. They advertise now.
ArtOzz
Oh good, instant coffin.
Goldenteckel
"Instant coffin" also came to my mind as soon as I saw this post.
ArtOzz
I shouldve added "and burial." too.
HitItMoreTimesThanIchiro
It's all fun and games until someone drops the vibrator.
SaVillaHg
Rescue shows up and i'd be like "Naa guys, pretty comfortable in here....you can leave me"
drahgosempire
I was gonna say it's an instant vacation. like you get woken up and bam Chill
mikeemoo2071
Just 10 more minutes guys
keeganmommy4life7
But how do you get out when the bed is covered with building rubble?!?
getthismanabeer
Uh... that's the whole idea. Keep rubble off of you and await rescue.
ArgonSpark
Somebody moves it...
TargetedAdBot
You can buy rocket add-on that will launch you to orbit through the rubble.
EatsBees
Rocket coffin!
SecretAsianGamer
What if I need to pee?
QuiteHugeMegaPlusUltra
Do you really need to pee exactly in the 15 seconds of duration of the earthquake? Even then, would you rather pee in your home's ruins?
NineByNine
tbf pretty sure if you get dropped into this death coffin you won't need to pee or shit any more for a while.
BeesKneesJohanson
Think of all the ways this could go wrong/malfunction. It’s a cool/“safe” design but I’m not sure if an proper engineer thought this up.
MarkOfTheCovenant
*upstairs neighbors bangin heavy af* *eaten by bed* *die*
dirtbikebilly
Goal is to do it so hard the bed thinks it's an earthquake.
TheFeralDog
I was thinking the same, would need a separate sexy time bed
stoicfibre
6.th scale orgasm
EatsBees
Exactly what I was thinking
mirrorz
Cool. Full of supplies once I chew through the fucking mattress to get to them.
TheRealGinjaNinja
Thanks, I just spit my drink on my dashboard
ThePunishersVengefulBrother
The mattress is stuffed with edible housemeat.
XxStechxX
mirrorz
mmm. Exotic housemeats.
iancarry
you and your logic
Camelspotting
Logic says they probably thought of that.
GISDirtNerd
Going to need some cleaning supplies after I crap the bed when it closes around me
nelson946
My thing is, if I was stuck in there for a couple days, where am I gonna shit?
ROBOTvsMAN
What you think the masks are for?
cancerriddenlung
You'll be far more concerned about your leg and all the blood.
ZanarkandAbes
Sure, you're safe in the box... But part of you didn't make it into the box.
cancerriddenlung
Rajelf
:0
cancerriddenlung
Acatno
What if your mom is walking around upstairs and it trigger then?
FatChecker
Irrelevant, there's not a big enough spatula to pry OP's mom off the couch that she's been crusted onto since the great war.
kimsahobbit
What if your mom is walking across the street and it triggers?
Rebmemer
I think I’d rather get crushed to death over buried alive.
weedtittiesandkitties
If the building has gas a fire is likely, so it will be like a giant instapot with ingredients in it.
PwnageHobo
With enough supplies to stay buried alive for weeks
Messingwithyou
So.... Toileting until help arrives? Don't shit where you eat or sleep, right?
RehabWOlf
It comes with a pack of adult diapers
The701
Well then don't eat or sleep.
NineByNine
here's the thing. you get dropped in with the mattress. On p. much ALL those models, food and water supplies are UNDER you now.
NineByNine
so yeah. just dropped arse over teakettle into a fuckin' dark coffin. LIGHTS are under the mattress too! and yeah. good luck w/toilet.
Doctorgivemethenews
Then you wake up 500 years in the future, and you’re the smartest person on earth.
TheRogueDangler
getthismanabeer
Would be an upgrayedd for lotsa folks.
Fletcher1985
I get that reference
echonite
You would have to be from 500 years in the future to not get that reference.
RelartOfGivia
I'm cool with it. As long as it has its own wifi connection and my PS4.
BobRossHB
Ummm power supply
TossABabyYodaToYourWitcher
What about a TV
TuggSpeedmann
NOOOOOOOOO!!!!
toft80
If you are rich enough to buy this, you probably wont be living in that deathtrap apartment block anyway.
Cereaza
Was about to say. If you can afford this, maybe just find a nicer building.
snakeoilsalesman
They gave versions of them to the poor living in high-rises in the blitz... Basically an iron cage with a mattress in it. Saved my grandma.
ThisIsSpaceballsTheUsername
Or New Mexico. No natural disasters besides boredom
grandmastonguekiss
Sand fleas?
Narwhilian
Downtown Seattle could get the shit quaked out of it. And it's not cheap to live there. That being said I think you're right in most cases
LetMeGoogleThatShtForYou
Farts really hard, gets locked up
mypuffrollwontturnover
Or sex
JaromirAzarov
If the sensors mistake you having sex for an earthquake you're either doing it very wrong or very well, I suppose...
SemperCallide
Seriously what are the building codes on that block those things just crumple.
NotMyUsualOnlineName
I think you're underestimating just how powerful earthquakes can be.
Steelflameblade
Especially if the area isn't known for earthquakes, and doesn't have the precautions that an earthquake prone area would have.
SemperCallide
That’s true. Hence Haiti, I suppose
NotMyUsualOnlineName
Dunno if there was any damage, but there were two earthquakes (4.4 and 3.3) sw of Knoxville, TN this morning. Not a common thing there. The
NotMyUsualOnlineName
record for the area was a 4.7 that happened in 1973.
Steelflameblade
I knew it, I thought I felt something last night. Couldn't tell if it was a quake or just the ventalation really being fucky and vibrating.
SpruceCaboose
We've had a 6.5 and 7.0 here in my memory. Literally hundreds of times more powerful than that and still not a big deal. That said, 1/2
ravnicrasol
Depends, I've seen some apartment that only the filthy rich could afford living in and they're not exactly modern buildings.
FrostyRaptor
Well California does get alot of earthquakes so I guess it makes sense.
drGrafenberg
They still stand because no quake has yet claimed them. Could be location or quality, both works.
leahatard
Gentrification!
KiLLeRdAcKeL2
*hipsters
Malkozaine
Honest question, Is Gentrification a good thing or bad? I assume it comes down to how fast it happens?
judobeer67
Both of the above can be seen as right awnsers
judobeer67
Unless the Hong Kong one is below this one oof
TheRogueDangler
brasschaos
there it is thank you
SpazzOut
ReverseTrapTsukasa
"Fucking Mimics"
tantallous
You'd think after the first couple times he'd learn and leave it alone.
TwoDogsInABathtub
Or to look at the chain? i dont even play that game and i know to look at the chain.
SillySnowFox
You just slap them first.
NineByNine
I love how people fall for this shit that late on. you can just swing the camera through every chest that's a mimic to see inside it.
NineByNine
hell you can fucking just look at what direction the chain is pointing. If it's at you, it means you're it's next meal.
MusterTheRohirrim
Chain to you, chomps on you; chain away, loot away!
NineByNine
fuck me that's genius. I love it. well done.
NineByNine
OR BETTER YET, FRIGGIN JUST WATCH IT GODDAMN BREATHE
sturmhauke
Ah mimics. A favorite troll tactic of game devs and dungeon masters everywhere.
TwoDogsInABathtub
Im more of a dropping mountains out of the sky kind of DM myself.
PowwerOrb13
Then you're just trying to kill your players. Mimics only kill the stupid and reward the heavily armed who don't run out of weapons
PowwerOrb13
God I love sticky mimics when weapons get stuck to them
sturmhauke
Or rust monsters, who eat your fancy plate armor for breakfast.
thtsbs
What’s the game?
Foxiol
Dark Souls, the first one.
Zixtank
The chain. Look at the damn chain!!
Voltair
haco1234
I saw the first episode and I was rlly uncomfortable. IDK WHY. It was fucking crazy tho. I’ve seen castlevania and that’s more Fucked up.
v01ara
It gets better. It’s mainly thee to serve as a reminder that this world sucks, the later episodes are more about him as a person less shock
Lagikrus
It has been made only to make people speak of the pilot. I find the other episodes much better and with that D&D feeling that I love.
Voltair
I feel that rape and murder and babykilling are probably enough to make you uncomfortable.
lordofthedice
Castlevania has gore, but pretty sure nobody got raped. So, that might be a large part of it.
haco1234
In the episode it actually sounded like people were dying and then that woman got raped and I was like”holy shit what the fuck”.
haco1234
I thought it was gonna be a fun anime like a lot of the other ones but I was DEAD WRONG.
stercusmoriturussum
Apart from the repost - what happens if you dangle a foot out, or just climb into the bed when the trigger fires?
[deleted]
[deleted]
Mazan
I don't see why it should close with such a violence that it would hurt you. The building will not collapse THAT quickly.
buttscratchergetyourbuttscratched
Or are trying to get to the bed but were too late
etilauqa
The "monster" will eat it
ilovedogknots
That’s why the first one
TheFeralDog
Or rough sex makes it close...
SmellOfMonkey
Then you have more room in the safety casket.
CapitalNick
Goodbye
AdamWeishaupt23
Simple. Your limb is severed and you drown locked inside, in your own blood.
Ensano
Or when you stretch your legs in the morning.
HughLaurie
Just have little walls or a sock-like top sheet to prevent limbs from being able to hang out.
ImNotAnOrange
you'd probably be okay in that last one, its got a head and footboard and the side flap things look like they leave a small gap
thebadhorse
Camelspotting
Your foot falls in with you I'd guess, and the bed can probably tell when you're in it.
kingramzeez
Good point
ravnicrasol
As far as I've checked the thing moves faster than you can react (so ouch) but it only fires if someone is on the bed to begin with.
kodiak931155
So..... to shreds you say?
dirtyketchup
What if there is a fire after the earthquake?
orbitn
Tasty snack for the survivors
dirtyketchup
I’ll make sure to store popcorn kernels in my sheets
jukusei
MisterMayor
Yes
CyberCunt
Maybe like at a sawmill, detecting that youre touching it and trigger a safety?
BeastByDre
intashu
You should have learned that already, keeping limbs off the bed is how the monsters get you!
Gilganesha
Not if you have your faithful teddy bear with you !
Echo18
But it's also how you keep the room from spinning when you're drunk.
TwoDogsInABathtub
I usually just hold on to the lawn so i dont fall of the earth when im drunk
intashu
Are you truly drunk if you manage to make it to the bed though?
ariesisboss422718
Oh thow hast much to learn of the levels and types of drunk.
Irreal
Maybe they drink in the bed.
Radix865
CaptainQuarkk
An interesting show.
Radix865
Yup.
Themurkydepths
You wouldn't happen to have the source would you?
CaptainQuarkk
Jinrui wa Suitai Shimashita .It's not bad if you want your yearly dose of "oh". Heads up: eps are not in chronological order, but still good
Frenchyman
Bye bye foot
Lobstrositiesbitme
Your capa is detated
blastedsteak
I understand this reference
apbadogsZ
RIP in peace Ed Truck
Quizz25S
What happens if it triggers and your house doesn't collapse?
UnattendedDeviant
Im thinking designers have place a manual or battery powered release mechanism inside the unit.
Frenchgeek
It makes the robbery way easier. Why?
AllThatJazzzzz
there must be an emergency release inside.
Jinxer13
what if you accidentally press it while flailing around as it goes down? (at this point i just enjoy trying to poke holes at the concept)
Binsto
make it a pul system or a 2 button system , or a hold for release button
TheFeralDog
Then you slowly suffocate or die of thirst.
PowwerOrb13
It said it has supplies and I doubt it comes without air holes unless you're more worried about drowning
TheFeralDog
I was joking...
WaterUnderTheRocketAppliances
To shreds, you say?
markdg
Was his apartment rent controlled?
RipOffTheBandAid
iLikeBeerandSquirrels
i want to buy you a beer
WaterUnderTheRocketAppliances
Can I have a squirrel instead?
iLikeBeerandSquirrels
of course! you're not gonna try and fuck it again, are you?
WaterUnderTheRocketAppliances
somethingisup
Fucking perfect
pandemicpete
darkavatar1183
And how is his family holding up?
warmNchewey
To shreds you say?
DarwinIsDead
yourFriendlyNeighborhoodBushSnake
Here ya go
v
FilthyLord
TresusIbor
An accurate representation of my asshole reading the above comment.
saltandsunshine
BlueSpaceLizard
Day 25: Supplies are running low in my bed-tank. As far as I can tell, I am still the sole survivor from the destruction of the Earth...
Quizz25S
Protects against interplanetary annihilation or your money back!
MyBigMouth
MrRobSteel
Now imagine the sound of the last bit of milkshake through a straw.
EmailFail
You get a faster death than suffocating
Perchuuu
Suffocating? Yes. I'm betting the engineers didn't think of that....
Ensano
Like airplane crash position
AttackMyWeakSpotForMassiveDamage
Brace position actually does protect you, but most airlines don't have enough room for you to do it correctly outside of first class.
Ohfishyfishyfishyfish
Well thats 50 different types of fucked up. I don't think I wanted to know that
Anonawesome
There's extensive research and explanation for the brace position just a single google search away. You do your own thing in a crash though.
saltandsunshine