Adopting a shy cat

Hi Imgur, I'm your friendly neighborhood feline behaviorist. Cats are often misunderstood creatures- I can't tell you how much misinformation I see out there about them. Part of this is because cats have NOT been studied scientifically nearly as much as some other species, such as dogs!

I want to help cats by making sure that humans have a better understanding of them, and thus don't have unrealistic expectations for their behavior. I figured why not share some info on Imgur :) even if you don't want to read it, you can at least enjoy a few pictures of some past shelter kitties! Everyone pictured in this post has been adopted.

Today's topic is about how to set up a shy cat for success when you are first bringing them home! I'm always really excited when people adopt shy cats, but it is absolutely true that not every home is well-suited for more timid felines. If you have barking dogs, boisterous children, constant visitors, or an otherwise very active, bustling home, I suggest you go for a more outgoing cat.

As for how to help chronically shy cats once they are already established in their home- that's a topic for another day.

While almost every cat is going to have some kind of adjustment period when getting used to a new home, shy cats in particular will find the change in environment scary. A lot of times, cats who start off shy in my shelter will become outgoing as they spend more time there and with me, but I still know they're going to be pretty fearful for at least a few days in a home, so I make sure we send their adopters home with the expectation of them being shy at first. It's extremely important to set a shy cat up for success to help them grow confident faster and bond with you sooner.

You should have a single room with a door you can close to start the cat off in; this should be set up before you bring your new cat home. A bedroom or quiet office space is ideal. I usually don't recommend using a bathroom, as they are usually too high-trafficked and can be a little small, but if it's your only option and you're willing to put some effort into the set-up, it can be made to work. You'll of course need all the necessities in this room- food, water, litter, scratcher, toys, etc. Depending on exactly how shy the cat you're bringing home is, you will probably want to block off 'human-inaccessible' hiding spots. Underneath a bed, high on a shelf in a closet, behind a bookshelf... cats can fit into VERY tiny spots and you want to be able to easily know where they are and have access to the area. If your cat spends all it's time hiding in a tiny dark hole that you can't even see, you won't have as many opportunities to bond with them. And if there's an emergency and you need to get them out NOW, you won't be able to.

Instead, give them appropriate hiding spots, and give them more than one option. Use a covered cat bed, a paper bag, a blanket draped over a folding chair to create a crevice underneath, or a cat tree or other cat furniture. Cardboard boxes are also awesome, of course- you can either have them on their side and drape a towel over part of the opening, or flip them upside down after cutting a cat-sized hole or two to provide access. You can and absolutely should use a crate as a hiding spot; keep it covered with a towel or blanket so it's dark and cozy. Getting them used to the crate as a safe spot will make your life so much easier for future vet visits or moves.

Very shy cats should be given a day or two to adjust before trying to engage with them very much. If your cat wants to hang out with you right away, of course indulge them, but don't be worried if they run to a hiding spot if you shift your position too quickly or if there's a loud noise. You should still give them some time to get used to the room, keeping the door shut, before you let them explore the rest of your house- if you let them out too soon it could overwhelm them and push them back into hiding. Some shy cats aren't that shy about people, but are more nervous about new environments.

If your shy cat doesn't want anything to do with you at first, don't worry. Give them 24-48 hours where you don't 'actively' engage with them too much. Bring them food and place it near their hiding spot (but not in it unless they're not eating anything, even overnight), hang out on the other side of the room playing on your phone, or sit nearby and read a book to them. It can be a good idea to leave low-volume TV, soft radio, or even a fan on, as the white noise can drown out background noises that could make them feel more anxious.

After a couple of days, if they haven't shown any interest in spending time with you, this is when you need to more actively- but gently- begin to interact with them. Continue to spend time in the room talking to them and just 'hanging out', but also try to engage them more. See if they want to play: use a wand toy or shoelace and swish it back and forth for them. Even if they won't play, but will watch it with their eyes, this is still a great sign you're on the right track. See if they are interested in being pet inside their hiding spot- extend a soft hand and let them sniff it, and if they don't flinch away from you or hiss, see how they feel about a little cheek scratch. Never start off by touching your cat's butt or back; this has more of a chance of startling them. Use food as a bonding opportunity; present their food to them at mealtimes and see if they will eat in front of you. You could even try putting food in your hand and see if they'll eat it that way, just make sure you keep your palm flat so they won't accidentally nip you. You should also offer high-value food, like cat treats, plain cooked chicken, or the 'juice' from a can of tuna-in-water. I've also had great success using catnip or silver vine with very shy kitties; it can help them relax.

As they start to enjoy interacting with you, push their boundaries a little- hold their favorite treat a little further away so they have to come out of their hiding spot to get it, or swing their favorite toy further away so they have to move to play with it. They will slowly begin to feel more confident and be willing to come out of their hiding spot to spend time with you.

Once your cat is feeling relaxed and confident with you and in their room, begin to leave the door open to the rest of your home. If you have a large house, I recommend you keep parts of it closed off so your cat doesn't have too much to explore at one time- expanding their world too quickly might be too scary for them. Whatever you do, DON'T lock them out of the room you started them off in- that's their 'safe zone' and they should be free to run back to it if they get overwhelmed.

It can take a while for shy cats to feel comfortable in a new environment. Some cats progress quickly and feel at home after only a week or two, while others may need a couple of months. If your cat is making slow progress, it doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong- they are still making progress! The number one thing when adopting a shy cat is to be patient. It drives me absolutely crazy when we adopt a shy cat out to someone, explain in great detail exactly how shy they are and how to help them, and then they call a week later saying 'my cat is hiding under the bed and won't come out, this isn't what I signed up for'. If you're going to adopt a shy cat, please understand that it's a commitment, and they aren't going to magically become friendly and confident in a matter of hours. Depending on their personality, they will likely always retain elements of skittishness, and probably always be afraid of strangers. But they will love YOU, SO much. I can personally attest to this- I adopted a very shy cat who is now a little snuggle muffin and adores me and her father more than anything.

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed the cat pictures.

Other posts:

Introducing cats: https://imgur.com/gallery/XnGVWru

Separation anxiety in cats: https://imgur.com/gallery/QOt86nf

Chatty cats: https://imgur.com/gallery/F95rJRJ

Inappropriate elimination: https://imgur.com/gallery/dFa9Vfk