CrimsonPermanentAssurance
29620
848
22
Sep 12, 2025 11:52 AM
CrimsonPermanentAssurance
29620
848
22
BojanglesTheFlyingCar
dude looks like he's constantly a fish out of water
cokebot9000
Likes he gives a shit about how good a job the fbi is doing.
Osiricus
Guy is in so far over his head that sunlight doesn't even reach that deep.
lightfoot2
Well, he only needs people to rough up immigrants and protesters. Glad he fired all the good ones.
Solkin
How have i never noticed his hella off center eye before this post?
Wiesel2000
When two squinters meet..... 🤪
MrSatisify
RigidGristle
ToSisPoS
He’s just annoyed that his branch is harder to spell than ICE
PileOfWalthers
DEI hire.
LivingDeadX
Somebody turned in the shooter.
Patel: "OH, THANK GOD!"
chatawillybilly
You wonder why Patel looks confused and out of place it's because this chump has no law enforcement background. All Trump cabinet members are unfit and unqualified for their positions.
GreenMnM
Ha. I just made that same exact comment 5 minutes ago. Zero hope of them doing anything to benefit anyone but themselves and their masters who tell them what to investigate and how that investigation will turn out
Funkman418
cocaine or meth head
BikeTrailsAndWaggingTails
why does this guy look like that? is it cocaine, special k, addies?
itwasababyox
Seth Meyers I think had my favorite one which is that he always looks like he just sat on his own balls
GCRust
Man looks like he owes money to the Hat Man.
Quebeker
Temu Adrian Pimento
Clayman8
#1 idk how, but the entire way he carries himself on EVERY DAMN PHOTO ive seen makes it seem like he's wearing that jacket as a "Make A Wish" kid who wanted to be an agent for a day.
Smartbutnotreally
I like how he praised the hard work of the FBI to catch the suspect in under 36 hours, 33 to be exact, when the dude was turned in by his own family. FBI had nothing to do with it
RealTurdFerguson
Sherlock Holmes used cocaine to solve crimes, so why can’t Kash?!?
Beefkins
The FBI had a very capable special agent that managed the Utah division...until they fired her for being Pakistani. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15089759/Kash-Patel-Utah-FBI-leadership-Charlie-Kirk-assassination.html
300Hectares1TankofKerosene
This guy is so out of his league. Right before this conference starts he looks down at his FBI patch and runs his hand over it, just like a little kid would if you gave them a real police badge. What a fucking joke.
newdeckchairforthetitanic
I can’t stand that the idiots are giving credit to the cops and fbi for bringing the suspect in. Good lord. His dad should get the credit.
CurbYourClassWar
Wait what happened?
newdeckchairforthetitanic
The suspect told his dad he had shot Kirk. His dad told the cops.
ActionJohnnie
Kommadore
A wild Johnny Dangerously reference‽
ToSisPoS
Farging bastiches
ActionJohnnie
Farging ice holes
drGrafenberg
No worries, we'll take anyone, papers or not!
HandFireWeapon
The fuck we will.
drGrafenberg
Not a Swede, i guess?
HandFireWeapon
Jo, jag är Svensk och du har fel. Reinfelts "öppna våra hjärtan" politik är inte vad vi har nu.
drGrafenberg
Nä, riktigt så extremt är det inte längre!
Kenbamazingbutprobablywontbe
Well... we know where all the drugs went.
nachosyndicate
He has the K-9 unit finds delivered straight to his office.
TalkingSnake
Thean has resting possum face.
TalkingSnake
https://media4.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTY1YjkxZmJlbDQxejJvajh0N2w1bXI0eTc5cjY2MjI4a2F1ZXE1dWN3bmVxaTVjMiZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/4KyhrjK1c60Y8/200w.mp4
myotherusernameismyotherusername
Please don't slander possums like this.
TalkingSnake
Tell me I’m wrong. https://media2.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTY1YjkxZmJlZWJtNzBzcDRlY2s2aDQzMXo0ZGJqbmk3MHBsaXloMzFhazE5c3d5YSZlcD12MV9naWZzX3NlYXJjaCZjdD1n/Uw0g5UZkATXplJPnRT/200w.mp4
ReggieWarrhol
Him and Don Jr always look like they've been snorting coke off a hookers ass in Vegas. Why is that?
pareidoliaperson
They have it right in their pockets at any time, that's why.
gorillaClutch
because hookers are happy to make money off these right wing dumbasses and laugh at them later.
TeddyMoment
Pretty sure the answer is in the question.
Tankzor
Surely they would get a dead hooker. They ain't paying for a live one.
32FGWolfhound
derekjohn
They obviously build their hookers big in Las Vegas.
alt1387
marquettegoldeneagles
Soo....drugs...
xj4low
He didn't bother to head out to salt Lake until after the 9/11 ceremony. There goes the all important 1st 24 hr of the search. All he jas done is throw money at the search. $100k for info. Trump doesn't care if the shooter is missing still as long as they can continue to blame the democrats for the shooting while knowing nothing about the shooter.
cgt9803
It's not like he contributes anything to the search except media gasbagging. Probably better if he stays in DC.
MarcUK
Are people dumb enough to think they'll get the $100k for info when the person that helped them catch Luigi's didn't get the $50k reward?
CrimsonPermanentAssurance
They ARE tens of millions of Americans who voted for Trump the second time after seeing what a Dumpster Fire his first term was
eronth
Yes. Most people are probably unaware of that lack of payout.
LoopStricken
Does this man ALWAYS look like he's just been caught enjoying having his dick crushed by a potato ricer?
AnonsAndMinions
Easy answer: High as balls on stims. I'd bet money on it.
nachosyndicate
They’re called drugs.
Lampmonster
Yeah, guy always looks like he's coked to the gills.
thatsbadmmkay
Its the meth
Bigblackdick69
I would say it more "this role is above my pay grade."
EaNasirsExcellentHighGradeCopper
thats.. thats an uncomfortably specific mental image.
Daraanel
Doesn't have to be a *mental* image.
BenderRodriguz1010
Yet not wrong
laserfork
In his official portrait I see the expression of an 8-year-old boy who swapped bodies with the Director of the FBI for a day.
TheMightyMollusk
I can hear the sound of a rotting potato slowly rotating in an old microwave.
nachosyndicate
And took some sweet pills up the nose.
WhiteRhino723
Was going to say the exact same thing... Word for word... Lol no but I did just realize I've never seen a video of him to compare with. I'm willing to believe he doesn't know how to control himself in front of a camera just like some people can't smile for a camera.
TomBrokaw
Stolen from a comment I saw yesterday: J Edgar Goober
DidaChikDumaChum
I can't believe this guy is the head of the FBI, and looking at this picture, neither can he apparently
AlexSomething
That's the Trump effect: "I can't believe [person] is [important position]"
oldradios19772000
Please tell me that's real
pyoopypops
It is. It shouldn't be, but it is.
MelfsAcidArrow
I always figured it was a combo of “these edibles ain’t shit” and “that wasn’t a fart”
AnonsAndMinions
This gave me a solid chuckle, which I badly needed. Thank you!
EmeraldNight
Add in a hint of "hey, photo op. Now"
TheLeanWolf
Nice, but what's a potato ricer? I'm picturing a device that somehow turns potatoes into rice form..
memedrift2410
That's basically what it does... Kinda
textilelover
That is pretty much what it is.
TemporarilyEmbarrassedThousandaire
It's like a big garlic press
Aquacomforter
It makes mashed potatoes
derekjohn
exactly, it makes the smoothest mashed potato, but they're a bugger to clean.
Badprenup
If you're going for that smooth of mashed potatoes personally I just use a mixer. I own one of those for other things anyways, no need for a separate kitchen device that only really does one thing.
yifin
Mixer goes too far into whipping the mashed potatoes. It's a texture thing. I'll eat them whipped but prefer icing after cooking a couple hours in a sous vide bath
magus200342
Old Toothbrush gets the fine bits on stuff like that pretty well imo
justfillingthespace
Using capital letters makes that sound like a proper name. As if you have some bird or hamster or other little critter that you call Old Toothbrush, and you just let him go to town on all your most stubborn dishes.
magus200342
Hah, not a bad name for a pet, but for some reason phone wants to capitalize toothbrush.