Nicidimus
361455
6228
214
Mar 6, 2015 3:43 PM
Nicidimus
361455
6228
214
RaynSideways
Lost it at #BlastEndedSkrewt.
MrsHiddle
Went to http://wizardsonly.com/ .... Found out I'm a muggle. Life over.
imentirelyrelevant
It should've been #PatrificusMahDickus.
TheEvilOverLordOfFlowers
Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders
DogtorRay
Turning into a cat would be a plus for me, a boyfriend and a kitty!
DontClickThisISwearItsForYourOwnGood
WHY DO THEY TAG THEMSELVES IN EVERY TWEET
sexwithdinosaurs
yeah as someone who uses twitter way too much, this bugs the shit out of me.
HogwartsToiletSeat
I'm relevant and I LOVE these.
LanaSmith
it always weirded me out how easily the houses could be thought of as gangs colors and everything why spread divisions among your own?
RoonildWeezlab
Perfect, a Harry Potter post! Ideal for my first comment. Don't screw it up, don't - David Yates! Fuck.
pedrobrv
I must be fun at parties, because: #2 I think there's a section in the Ministry of Magic for language translations (like gobbledegook) 1/?
pedrobrv
and international communication, so I assume Ancient Runes is a useful skill there. #14 Only because it's never stated doesn't mean 2/?
pedrobrv
they're single. McGonagall for instance is a widow. #19 You'd know, when angry veela become distorted, ugly. Fleur is only part veela. 3/3
MuggleStudies
Still unsure of what a rubber duck is for
mrbenlanders
more plz
lemonsherbet
#12InchesUnyielding xD
boomer0001
my fav
redrovered
There's so much HP fanfiction about magical dildos
lemonsherbet
Engorgio
Expectopatronshots
http://imgur.com/pvcQN8A well played
Nevermour
polyjuice to turn into a girl or boy to see yourself(that person) naked should like be on the list
nateonabike
#IKnowWhichHalfIsGiant got me.
SaltyHams
Same
Snowpocalypse
upvoted because of "You don't have to lonely at WizardsOnly.com"
mollyollyolly
I went there and was disappointed...
Tilden
These. We need more of these.
P0ffee
Anyone else go on Twitter to look for this, thinking it was a real parody account?
magikid
I don't understand why it's not.
TyphoidExplosion
This post is a keeper. +1
hencethequeef
No, no. http://media.tumblr.com/57d207c754315da394ec0811d0ecd17a/tumblr_inline_nke3p4MUVT1rorkhx.gif
ineverfinishanyofmy
I wonder how Hogwarts is doing after almost 20 years since Harry's little adventure
ThespianJester
Learning probably happening...
Confusion567
Not to mention, the headmaster is now No-Nonsense McGonagall instead of Chocolate-Frogs-And-Whimsy Dumbledore.
goodguyC
To be fair, the werewolf was an amazing defense against the dark arts teacher...
tankmemes
Barty Crouch Jr was pretty good too.
imfromtheinternetandimheretohelp
Something something know your enemy
Confusion567
I mean, most of them were fine teachers in some way or another (except Umbridge), just also evil [lupin wasn't evil, but racism]
Mylakka
He wasn't evil but he STILL tried to eat his students. Regardless he should have taken his wolfsbane. That was criminal neglect.
pedrobrv
Not really though, Quirrel was a weako and was bullied by the students, Lockhart never taught anything other than about himself 1/2
pedrobrv
and Snape never explained how to do something, he just went after you expecting you to figure how to defend and resist on your own. 2/2
Confusion567
[that is, from the perspective of students not friends with him, that's maybe a thing you don't want from a teacher, that he's a werewolf]
makarsviolin
These left me stupified. +1
FubukiAmagi
All the people in Slytherin, AWK! All the people in Ravenclaw, AWK!
airandfingers
Did you know it's actually spelled stupefied? Liquefied, putrefied, and rarefied too, but it's petrified, not petrefied. English ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
HeroThatWasNeeded
WhenTheMusicsOver
Have you been waiting your whole life for just one, FUCK? One tiny little innocent, FUCK? When you feel like you're shit out of, LUCK?
scottau74
The second one doesn't make sense. Why would Hogwarts give degrees? Graduating it is like finishing highschool.
Rapiecage
iirc the exams at the end are their specialties. I'm not sure if Wizard University exists.
theseventh
They go up to the equivalent of A-levels, up to age 18. You pick about 4 subjects to begin to specialise in, before degree.
PhysicsAndRomance
For anyone who hasn't seen it - enrich your life by googling 'A Very Potter Musical'
DinoBotBot
"I gotta get back to Hogwarts! Gotta get back to schoooolll"
murderhobbit
It's so good
AbsolutionJailor
#StarKidsInSolidarity
redrovered
And don't forget A Very Potter Sequel for the best villain of all time
JonestownClassPresident
Did you get my text?
peachsnapple
draco's obsession with pigfarts + rumbleroar = hilarity
DinoBotBot
I love his irrational fear of the potty
NotRick
#8 Imagine being her boyfriend. You agree to meet up somewhere, and when you get there you find a cat. You ask the cat whats wrong. 1/2
NotRick
You start flirting with the cat, asking it to change form. Then she comes by, and you realize you were flirting with an actual cat 2/2
Confusion567
"WHAT THE HELL YOU DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE ME?! YOU THINK WE ALL LOOK THE SAME?!"
HashtagDadJokes
"#10PointstoDeanThomas"
WhenTheMusicsOver
Because he's black?
xscythe7x
#IKnowWhichHalfisGiant
hufflepufflife
#Wood4Wood
ineverfinishanyofmy
9 3/4 points*
mrmnbvcxzxcvbnm
Shh let them have their rounded dong size!
zackofspades
Past 9 inches you may as well round the fuck up. Dude got that DD dick.
NotRick
Do they use inches?
RubberCatTurds
So, don't the British use metric? (9.75 cm = 3.84")
theseventh
Metric for objects, imperial for people. When granny asks how much the baby weighs, she isn't gonna understand kg so lb sticks for people.
CaptainUnspeakable
Have you seen wizard money? They definitely have not switched to metric.
pmmeyourtitsforpuns
Werent wands also in inches
SirBedeveretheWise
JK Rowling said that Wizards use the standard system because metric is too normal
CaptHollyShort
Depends what we're measuring. Penis size is in inches, height is in feet and inches, distance is miles..... Some things are metric
RubberCatTurds
I would like to believe you, but I have a nagging suspicion that the bro code is being used to help Dean.
CaptHollyShort
I'm a girl
Ekajra
Never let a Birt mock an American for our system. They use metric, imperial, and whatever else they feel like. Like stone.
CrazedChronicler
Can't believe the worst thing they have to say about Umbridge is that she's racist.
SAMUSSlaughter
I would have went with spawn of satan, but hey to each their own.
therogueduchess
Umbrage and Hitler might have gotten along... so yeah, not as much "racist" as "wants to euthanize all non-pureblood humans".
superben
#CentaurRapeFTW
UnspokenX
#ThatsMostDefinitelyMyFetish
wantfastcars
I thought they mentioned her first
hjvaughan
#10PointsToWantfastcars
CoconutCyclone
They were mentioned in book order. She's the 5th one.
Debug200
Wooosh.
therogueduchess
Naw, that was turban dude. Remember how Voldy was growing out the back of his head?
wantfastcars
I was making a joke about her being the "actual dark lord" making Quirrel the racist
Sexlexic
The room of requirement was mostly used for hardcore bondage.
WhenTheMusicsOver
INCARCEROUS.
Confusion567
It always gives you... exactly what you need. Matter of fact, I wonder if it's one of those "knows you better than you know yourself" 1/
Confusion567
deals. Like you go in hoping to find a new textbook or something, and it gives you whips and chains instead. "Oh my god, I never knew..."2/2
pedrobrv
In the books for it to work you have to walk near it 3 times, thinking "I need (...)". so if you're thinking "i need bdsm" it'll give you.
helpnonamesareleft
#GoodFinder got a laugh out of me.
WhenTheMusicsOver
FINDING THAT GSPOT.
ThisNameIsLame
#WizardsOnlyDotCom was my favorite one.
Wrkncacnter
what the hell is a hufflepuff.
evillesbianfromthesnakehouse
http://imgur.com/kfwwTpB
Wrkncacnter
Fuck, that gif is perfect. +1
AbsolutionJailor
I get stupidly happy whenever I think I've found a StarKid. It's usually a false flag though, and then I make myself sad.
HPWombat
I met the StarKids at LeakyCon. They're super nice!!
heartinlandslide
Look at this! It's Rocketship Potter! Starkid Potter! Moonshoes Potter! Traversing the galaxy for intergalactic travels to Pigfarts.
evillesbianfromthesnakehouse
I legit made my account so that i could finish someone's reference to Gaston from Twisted with "A BUFFALO MONSTER!"
ohlavache
Me! I'm one!
AbsolutionJailor
Damn! I can't think of a reference to celebrate my happiness! Um. *Draco rolls around the stage and koala hugs under a bench* Blast!
KeleesiPls
What does that one mean?
AbsolutionJailor
Running joke in the Harry Potter musicals on YouTube by StarKid Productions. They're stellar if you like/can stand musicals.
helpnonamesareleft
It's a quote from A Very Potter Musical.
Crystilized
The hufflepuff house are known to be good finders, like raven claw is known for being smart or gryffindor known for being brave
Crystilized
Honestly they have the most shit trait to be known for, which is why everyone laughs at Hufflepuffs