ChefShwasty
447875
9120
293
Fuck.
Previously, on Imgur:
1, The Intro: http://imgur.com/gallery/LspSx
2, The Reaction: http://imgur.com/gallery/DyeoT
3, The Final Straw: http://imgur.com/gallery/kvR8xsB
4, A New Dope: http://imgur.com/gallery/gh9J3
5, Neighbors Strike Back: http://imgur.com/gallery/XwHla3s
6, Upper-Management: http://imgur.com/gallery/cMo0S
7, Upper Mgmt PT 2: http://imgur.com/gallery/Uu7I0
8, Final Update...?: http://imgur.com/gallery/JxLBIa4
9, Managers FIRED: http://imgur.com/gallery/2opOV
10, THE WAR IS COME: http://imgur.com/gallery/Btif7
11, The Intervention: http://imgur.com/gallery/3OtFt
I posted this earlier and had to take it down, because I accidentally left my address on here. Big fuckin' whoops. Please don't stalk me.
Anyways, so, this happened. Remember the new, fair manager? The one that actually listened and called the Psychos out on their bullshit? The one that hosted a meeting that somewhat cultivated in her asking them to take a fuckin' chill pill and relax?
Canned. Fired. Hasta la vista, rationality.
So, I'm kinda at a loss. I'm going to meet the new managers tonight. It's just a real shame. Bianca was very relaxed, professional, fair, and intelligent.
I have this sinking fucking feeling like those psychos might've had something to do with their termination. And I really hope the new managers are open to listening to all sides of the story, and stand up for equal living rights.
But on another note...
You see that? That's an awesome pile of donations you guys have given to help animals. If you're unaware of what's going on here, check this out: http://imgur.com/gallery/Nw9w6
Some time in April (have to wait for my vacation time to be renewed at my work so I can take a full day off and do this) I'll be heading down to the Willamette Humane Society to take pictures and video, and show where your donations are going. If you bought a tennis ball thrower or laser pointer, you'll get @yourname mentioned, and get to see an adorable kitty or puppy playing with it! Or eating the food. You will see the end result of your kindness and generosity.
Here's the list of accepted donations: https://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wishlist/43LNY65R05WN/ref=cm_sw_su_w
And here's where to ship it:
Joe R
1590 Sunnyview RD
Salem, OR 97301
And as for all the packages that have been sent to me personally:
Those have remained sealed, even the one that makes a ticking noise, and smells kinda weird. I'm opening all of them on Saturday, and see if I can't make a post about all of it. I'm anticipating some weird shit. Even after someone literally sent me shit (http://imgur.com/gallery/TlhU2 and http://imgur.com/gallery/KN5tCTX).
And on a final, more intimate note, I apologize to the people I haven't replied to lately. I've got some personal (health/mental health) stuff going on that's put me in this weird depression haze. Usually I'm able to shake it pretty damn quick, but this time, it's sinking a little deeper. I promise I'll pull out of it soon and get to the letters/emails/messages.
Thank you for all the love and support, and thank you to all my wonderful Imgur/SnapChat friends who send me funny stuff. Let's end this fucking saga soon.
-Chef
EDIT: I'm really sorry I had to re-upload this. I accidentally left my HOME address fully exposed in the first picture (address above is not my apartment) previously, and as soon as that was pointed out, I had to take it down. I don't want any blowback for myself, the managers, or neighbors. Thank you for understanding.
dumpytom
@OP When you meet the new manager tonight tell them they'll probably be fired within 6 months. The turnover rate at that place is insane.
sunflower37
Just caught up with your story. Once, my downstairs neighbors called the cops, & had CPS go into my apt b/c I had 'left children there 1/2
sunflower37
unattended' (I was at work). Umm, I have a cat. AND I'm barren. People are dicks. I moved. AFTER I had a big ole party. Fuck that.
MarishkaGinny
If it hasn't been said, these people are the worst. You will ALWAYS hear neighbors at least a little in apartments. If they can't handle...
MarishkaGinny
...being reminded that they have neighbors they shouldn't live in an apartment.
TheGrumpest
I feel bad for their kid(s?). They don't seem like happy people.
DoctorNumberFour
Hmm... Has piercing a circle through the lower layer of your apartment, then proceeding to defecate through it crossed your mind, perchance?
Sinisfun
Indeed:::sips soylent green tea:::
Marbleous
I like the :::'s. Big functional programming fan.
FinallyRElephant
Shit through the floor is how the youths put it these days, I do believe.
Junai
Fuck your neighbors. Fuck them in the ear.
ChefShwasty
Right in the canal.
Lucallia
no. in the ass. with a giant thorny cactus.
FNHuskys
This is nuts. The whole thing. Nuts.
ChefShwasty
Every single nut.
spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaccee
THAT'S A LOTTA NUTS.
DRFUZY
Where's the video of the intervention?
DiggerPlease
Yeah I wanted to hear that too, come on OP, deliver as promised or explain why it didn't happen!
henkiepenkie2
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Eoq9HJTE8E gotta say the comments on screen are a bit childish. Keep it rational chef. U better than this.
KittenMittensofSteel
You've got the patience of a saint and you're handling this much better than most people. I hope you get the justice you deserve.
ChefShwasty
Thank you so much.
KittenMittensofSteel
Jameszombob
Do the neighbors know they are internet infamous?
onetwothreefourideclareathumbwar
Yep
OmiMichelle
Is anyone else disturbed by all the management getting fired again?
ChefShwasty
I am.
OmiMichelle
Me too, Chef. Me too.
HitTheBiker
First thing i would do is go straight to the new management and fill them in on the crazy.
HitTheBiker
Second thing i would do is cut a hole in the floor and shit thru it
ThisSiteUsedtobeCool
I don't care what your excuse is, just move. Move, move, move. Your life energy is being wasted on this. Be the better person. Move.
OSCgal
Yes. Move. This has gone on far too long.
jesusmcpleasus
Felony flats, huh? That explains a lot.
StupidFingAsshole
The portfolio manager must have some serious mental deficiency if she can't figure out what's been going on by now
ChefShwasty
I'm sure she knows.
chillinoutmaxinrelaxinallcool
Just snapped you some food. Sorry about all the bullshit!!
ChefShwasty
Pork tenderloin! Looked awesome.
chillinoutmaxinrelaxinallcool
Thanks!! :)
Carnes28
@ChefShwasty neighbors know about Imgur posts, so I guess they know pretty much everyone thinks they're dicks, right? I mean, they 1/2
Carnes28
haven't sued for liable (but you've also protected all identities, so...) I guess they aren't denying the claims you made. Just wondering2/2
TheGrumpest
*libel
ChefShwasty
It would seem so. I'm not sure how I'd feel if I were them, knowing they're hated internationally...
Carnes28
If it were me, I might reevaluate my behavior, but it's not like they became ass holes over night, so I'm sure that they feel like martyrs
s1mulacrum
Don't wait for another noise complaint. Welcome the new manager, bring them a cake, give them a heads up about your crazy neighbours.
sebastionloeb
@OP we love you chef. Youre a pillar of rationallity in the sea of crazy that is imgur. Keep doing you.
ChefShwasty
I may be rational, but I'm totally not sane.
ChefShwastyJr
I love you, Father.
Santorrr
Good... Let the hate flow through you.
ellekitty
Sanity is boring anyway, some say also confining.
feeltheice
Matters not I love you. If I was in your area and had a house I'd rent it to you even if I took a loss.
ChefShwasty
Aww, I love you too!
brettiferrr
I can totally ship this
ohnoitsavikingchick
Good! Being sane isn't fun at all (I'm guessing). Never forget, "This too shall pass". You'll get out of the rut eventually :)
Zephenz
Push through it man! I'm hoping for you and so is the rest of Imgur!
TruFox
Speak for yourself.
BobThePeanutOfficial
Push it right through a hole in the floor.
ChefShwasty
Thank you! And fuck you, other guy!
ematic
DO NOT GIVE IN. DO NOT MOVE. Don't change units. Don't let the entitled shits get what they want, and keeping having their way. WIN THIS ONE
ChefShwasty
I'll win it for you.
ematic
*warm embrace.....followed by awkward, "why did we just do that?" stare*
shinagami091
Fuck that shit. I would have moved ages ago. You can't reason with crazy.
Ssssssssssss
If you're the same person I remember complaining months ago, I think you might just want to move.
dj505
Things could still get better! There's a good chance the new manager is decent, too.
ihaveaten
Have you considered getting a Lawyer? This is getting into constructive eviction territory.
itcouldbeme
awesome rush poster!
ChefShwasty
Thanks, man! It's BLACK LIGHT ACTIVATED!
itcouldbeme
can I please have a link???
SteevyT
Ok, that's awesome.
ThailandExpress
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnXRwmcKnes Our new Oregon State Song Greetings from So. Oregon btw
ChefShwasty
I love you, and your user name.
ThailandExpress
:) . Sorry for your troubles, been reading ur posts over the months. I've been a rush fan since Jr High ('83), own every album lol
ChefShwasty
Which one is your favorite?
KnowsPick
Sick!
JacobWrecker
I'm jealous.
SlickerThanNick
isn't blacklight activation a tad noisy though? ;)
ChefShwasty
Nice.
Megafelps
Hey, can i be in the update list?
Megafelps
Somebody just told me i can just follow you, so no need, but thanks anyway! Hope you get some peace soon
Andalite
Add him on Snapchat he posts every time there's an update
DoritoNinja316
Just follow him. All the parts if his story always makes FP
ChefShwasty
I'll try.
ArinL
Need updates!!! I'm lucky I have come across now and then. Hoping to see it work out in your favor!
aethernyx
Now I'm vested in this, me too please :)
niftybiscuit
me too please :)
Ifavouriteanimalgifs
Same here
seoulhyunnie
me too please!
Cartoones
.
DouglasAdams042
Put me on there as well if you can mate. Though I am following you on snapchat as well anyway xD
LadyWidebottom
Just follow the user if you have the mobile app
DouglasAdams042
Fair point there
sweetnaivety
I asked to be on the update list but I only got updated once, so I followed on mobile, yay.
BrazilianThunderPanda
Fuck that shit. People can click the + by your user name, follow you and get notifications from Imgur when you post.
Megafelps
Oh i can? Thanks!
missastromccluskey
not on a freaking laptop
Merisiel
Unfortunately, that's only available on the mobile apps. For now. https://help.imgur.com/hc/en-us/articles/218362583-Following-a-user
MatrimBloodyCauthon
I CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT :(
TheAuthorOfTheJournalsMyBrother
I don't think you can on PC
DildoSchwagins
Could we possibly get THEIR address so we can send them "fun, exciting, and totally appropriate" [for the situation].
Dreigiau
Well, he did post where to send stuff to him,if you just +/-1 from the number it might get to the right place (probably not since thru floor
stormtroopergotmyback
That address is his work I believe.
ChefShwasty
Hahano.
SnookerSylph
Chef if you're not going to take the initiate and shit through a hole in your floor then we need their address to ship em shit lol
TomBrokaw
While your refusal is wise, rational, logical, humane, and enlightened...
HitlersArtCritic
If you had THEIR address, you'd have HIS too, since its clear he's above them. Plus I think its illegal and anything we do will hurt him.
DrKriegersClone
Well, shipyourenemiesglitter.com isn't really hurtful per se.
HitlersArtCritic
No, but not everyone will just "send glitter." Especially if they're willing to travel and do something to influence this.
Hybris51129
It really sounds like you need to cut your losses and bug out.
TheAvengingKnee
He has brought it up before and the @OP can't afford to do that.
Thisusernameispoliticallyincorrect
*cut a hole in the floor
DigHat
I hope the new manager is as good. My mom used to say hope for the best and expect the worst, so you am never disappointed. Stay strong Chef
Bigolmantitties
thank god youre not my parents
AirfishNomad
I read this in a book in school and told my mom. Found out she opted to expect the best and fear for the worst. Using this for my offspring
amyphister
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_TKXPPjhRk
heirloomengraving
Hope for the best and prepare for the worst.
mebe21
Hope is the first step on the road to disappointment.
lollymj
My Dad used to tell me that, too. It's fantastic advice.
DigHat
You are* also if you could add me to the update list that would be awesome.
TheSwedishMoose
You can subscribe to users on mobile.
ForSomeAbstractReason
We had an amazing manager for 2½ years, then she left. The new manager put a chain smoker below us (apartment was previously nonsmoking, and
ForSomeAbstractReason
I guess that changed with the management too). I told her I was pregnant and asthmatic, and the only option we were given was to move.
AMagicFlyingTurd
That sucks n shit but I'm surprised and impressed you did the little 1/2 symbol rather than just typing 1/2
ForSomeAbstractReason
Hold the 1 on mobile to gain access to fractions :)
Thornaxe
DongSayaDae
If i was a smoker - and my above pregnant asthmatic neighbour asked me to take some care about my smoking i would. -
ForSomeAbstractReason
He didn't, and it actually got worse -.- I think he was just a shitty person and I was unlucky.
DongSayaDae
Some people are assholes, wish you the best. Also if he lives right under you then all you have to do is cut a hole and shit through it.
DongSayaDae
Such as going outside, walking a bit until i reached your front door or air vent.
ForSomeAbstractReason
Not even that much effort required, we were 3rd floor, so all he had to do was smoke in the living room to spread it up to our apartment.
KindaOkay
have you thought about cutting a hole in the floor and shitting in it?
Pineapplebanger
Or dropping sent shit into the hole made in the floor...
kojinko
EMCLOLS
You deserve a award XD I swear this comment made my day today.
usernametakenisthestoryofmylife
But shit quick, they might have a broom, and that could get ugly.
MnemonicMonkeys
Or erotic
GerberLegalTeam
None of these posts would really be complete without this comment.
bitemark
I still think OP (or somebody) should put that on a shirt and sell it.
wefearchange
Why shit in it when he's got shit all ready packaged and ready to shoot down a shit chute?
JayEnfield
doodlydoodlydoo
Still the only rational response.
HalVonDon
upvoting this is mandatory
fatimous
Knowing his luck they may try and throw sharp objects up the hole, or pull a firearm. Neighbors sounds outright batshit crazy.
puddlewalker
Or a hose line into their apartment with mustard gas
DrDresDog
I feel like someone asked this question before
whatseventhepointt
I don't know if I should be proud of this or not. I am though.
MValles85
.
HeyDontBeADick
Bahahaha +1
PleaseNotTheFace
First comment. BAM. There it is.
JayEnfield
asspickle
or drop pickles in the hole!
Grudgebearingmidget
Mud pickles?
RemiRixJones
Username: relevant.
Zombraina
1. Cut hole in floor. 2. Pickle in ass. 3. Shit pickle into hole. 4. Profit
usernamerelevantsoon
Ahh , the Chicago Sunroof , made infamous by Saul Goodman
usernamerelevantsoon
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkZ15zBcJTU
deftpwnz
He wanted some soft serve, I gave him some soft serve.
boonearoo
In an apartment complex, it's the Detroit Skylight.
ChefShwasty
Never crossed my mind,
Combatmatt
Now that it has. Thoughts?
thecmerrilees
You really need to apply some creative problem solving then. In all seriousness, hope you pull through!
realmenfightnaked
then have you considered taking a shit on the floor and poking a hole in it
Fuhque92
Cut the hole then reseal it with wood glue, theyd never know
JayEnfield
emguhraeb
attack from a different direction. consult your lease, consult local ordinance laws, do what your allowed to do. and do it well. remember
emguhraeb
if you know your boundaries, you can do whatever the hell you want as long as they arent crossed ;)
bagelman2
Try it
iilloovveeiimmgguurr
Dude I've been waiting for your update. It's been awhile
Heibrin
We can provide cutting tools. Or shit. Lots and lots of shit.... just saying.
Pauun
I'm surprised no one has yet to send you a cutting tool of some variety
98VoteForPedro
pretty sure thats what the shit was for
Willybum84
ImmaNeedBoutTreeFiddy
Willy bum bum
HalfPint3895
Same ????
OtherBarryDylan
I'd strongly recommend it. Hell, I'd consider coming up to Oregon and eating nothing but Mexican food for three days before to contribute.
IAmTheBadW01f
Hey, you can mix it up with some Indian curry too!
hippybobby
From the sketchiest gas station
IAmTheBadW01f
Honestly it can be high quality stuff; if it's spicy enough it'll cause the lava flow
tomyironmane
Dude, I'll eat brussels sprouts and broccoli and wash it down with a pot of coffee before shitting in their heat exchanger.
OtherBarryDylan
And not good Mexican food either. Like sketchy, dirty restaurants guaranteed to give me the shits.
MnemonicMonkeys
Then add in some Wendy's for good measure
anarkyle
That's not hard in Oregon.
VoIdemort
So you're offering your services as shit prostitute?
hippybobby
And gas station indian curry
LotusOfTheCatalyst
There's a couple of those in my area. But those are mine, and mine alone.
tomyironmane
Haribo Sugar Free Gummi Bears. LET THE ASSPOCALYPSE BEGIN!
brettiferrr
This suggestion is a very sharp double-edged sword
Eighteenminusfive
WHOA Satan, take it easy there!
iConfirmAnythingAndEverything
This went south real quick.
senseihugo
Dont forget cheap light soda!
justyourfriendlyneighborhoodimgurian
Incase @OP needs help...here it is. 1) Cut a hole 2) Admire that hole 3) Shit through the hole 4) Rejoice!
Ryebread91
Looks like a comic you'd find in captain underpants.
delpharseven
5) Close hole because it is smelly.
Dorkette
You forgot to add the most important part.. Eat a ton of spicy food the day before and unleash it the next day :D
F1Monkey
As a doctor I prescribe doing this as a daily regimen. We can follow up on how it affects your health in one week.
Ragswolf
We might need to do some clinical testing for this experimental therapy. Get some control groups going. Same hole of course. To save costs.
JayEnfield
DanteHicks79
That is fucking glorious
boxesoftacos
It's a glorious hole ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
justyourfriendlyneighborhoodimgurian
Wait, are you supposed to even be here today?
DanteHicks79
I'm not! 37?!?!
ChefShwasty
That is a stellar drawing, man.
justyourfriendlyneighborhoodimgurian
Just helping out, my friend!
SonsOfMoog
Lost it at the tube socks.
justyourfriendlyneighborhoodimgurian
My life is complete. Thank you!