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Item #: SCP-1370
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-1370 is locked in a fire-proof glass display case, stored in Gallery 27. If the case becomes damaged by external circumstance, any container with dimensions of at least 1.25 x 0.75 x 0.50 meters will suffice as a replacement until a new display case is available. The Ethics Committee recommends that any long-term storage case contain enough space for SCP-1370 to move freely. Level 2 personnel and higher may remove SCP-1370 from its case at their discretion, but will face disciplinary action for failing to secure it properly afterward.
Description: SCP-1370 is a self-aware artificial being constructed from various electrical devices and tools. It stands approximately one meter in height and is capable of moving its articulated joints despite the lack of any power source or motors. SCP-1370 communicates in a monotone voice via a speaker mounted in its chest.
Its head is a voltmeter soldered upside down to a neck joint, giving the appearance of a friendly smile, but containing no active sensory devices. However, SCP-1370 will react to visual and audible stimuli, and its ability to do so is hampered when the head is covered or otherwise restrained. Its design appears to give more importance to aesthetic concern rather than function, as evidenced by a poor center of gravity that hampers its ability to balance and walk. It is therefore believed that SCP-1370 was created as an art object and later imbued with anomalous properties, rather than designed with those in mind.
It can currently speak fluent American English, French, and Latin, and is capable of learning new languages. Other facets of its intellectual capacity have not been clearly outlined as SCP-1370 is invariably hostile in all interactions with any being or object it interprets to be sapient; this includes but is not limited to animals, Foundation personnel, civilians, audio-visual equipment and security cameras.
If SCP-1370 encounters an object it believes to be sapient, it will attempt to engage the object in combat while introducing itself with a variety of elaborate titles which appear to be selected at random. Examples include DoomBot 2000, RoboLord the Destructor, Prime Minister Sinister and Darth Claw Killflex. SCP-1370 will often include variations to these titles based on responses it receives from personnel; Foundation staff have successfully introduced Patheticon the Garglemost and PesterBot to its lexicon.
Addendum: Many tests on SCP-1370's combat prowess have been run, each confirming that SCP-1370 lacks the physical aptitude to cause damage to any living being. Test 1370-8239 exposed SCP-1370 to a common houseplant with a speaker hidden in the plant's pot. After SCP-1370 was provoked verbally, it attempted to fold and twist the leaves of the plant within its grasp before incapacitating itself. See log that follows:
Researchers L. Allans and T. Bausoom carry SCP-1370's case into the testing chamber. The case is set down one meter from a potted philodendron fitted with a small speaker.
SCP-1370: Release me, insects. I am Doom-Master Thirteen Seventy Master Of All Doom. I shall be the herald of your destruction.
Researchers leave the testing chamber and the case is opened remotely. Although no security risk is determined, the test requires SCP-1370 to focus on the plant rather than nearby personnel. Observations are made via an opaque glass window to prevent SCP-1370 from attacking its own reflection.
SCP-1370: At last I am unleashed upon this earth so deserving of destruction. All shall be rent within my pinchers. All shall be trampled beneath my feet. I am ShivaTron, Despoiler of Mirth.
Researcher P. Davies: (through the speaker mounted in the plant) Hello! Can you hear me?
SCP-1370: (approaching the plant) Who dares. All souls will burn. You will feel the sharp sting of my wrath. Identify yourself so that I may sing damnation upon you as you die.
P. Davies: I am a split-leaf philodendron, a semi-woody shrub with large glossy leaves. (restrained laughter) These leaves can grow up to three feet long.
SCP-1370: (attempts to wrestle with the leaves) Your mockery spells your doom. I have arrived. You will be crushed betwixt my digits.
SCP-1370 falls over and is unable to right itself. After approximately six minutes it knocks the pot over, which rolls into a position that pins SCP-1370's body to the floor of the chamber. Researchers enter to return SCP-1370 to its case.
Source: http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1370
SuperSaiyanHarambe
This is like a super aggro Johnny 5.
FuryofHoboken
OMG it is just like that toaster from Old World Blues aka the cutest appliance a person could own
SomeTimesIUseImgurOkMostTheTimeIUseImgur
I don't know why these are so popular now but I love it so much.
JustHereToFactYouUp
SkyNet is in Alpha. Preorder now and get added to the Beta " no kill" list.
DepressToImpress
DO NOT INTIMIDATE ROBO-DUDE. http://www.scp-wiki.net/challenge-accepted
strugglesnuggler
The problem with this is that it lacks the other parts of the wiki. The GOIs, the extended test logs or the other short stories
chudtime
Yeeeeees! More SCP
lichandlibertine
Prime Minister Sinister = an honorific I didn't know I wanted until this moment
disreputabledog27
I like how all the other SCPs are terrifying and murderous and this is just a cute lil doom bot that tries
Imhereforthelurking
There's the jello monster who tickles you into genuine joy, and just wants to friendly and helpful. It eats fucking CANDY.
queeferito
Omg prime minister sinister
JustARegularOldPotato
Like the toaster in Fallout New Vegas! :D
freegiant
When your object classification is just right
DnoopSogg
Why did I read the whole post?
MrMeleeRobot
I like how there are a good few SCP fans on this website you can find lovers of most good niche stuff on this website
TrijezniMujo
Reminds me of the toaster in Fallout Old World Blues
Mobileuserwholikestoberandom
I'm just thinking of Killgore from My Life as a Teenage Robot.
ArianaGrandesLeftTit
ive seen this before but not relatera to SCP... think it was a animation or something, maybe the movie robots
UngratefulNoob
A lot of the SCP articles need to use other source materials for their pictures. That's just kinda how they work.
MagnorCriol
I think it was Killgore in My Life As A Teenage Robot.
aSparkleVillain
Prime minister sinister!!
KaladinStormbro
Sounds kind of like Claptrap off of Borderlands lol
Jrhoney
No disassemble!
OstentatiousMusings
dauminator87
"Darth Claw Killflex" is the most metal name i've ever heard.
SaltismySugar
@camdenmyers
IVerifyPeoplesUsernames
...so, if it detects me, will it be a Terminator I'm fighting or a mouse droid?
Imhereforthelurking
Boxbot. http://gunnerkrigg.wikia.com/wiki/Boxbot
andergriff
it lost a fight to a potted plant.
HashtagDadJokes
The foundation has an ethics committee?
UngratefulNoob
The foundation does have an ethics committee. But it's REALLY not as good as it seems. Some people believe the ethics committee are the>
UngratefulNoob
>ones who actually make all the decisions.
alexburgers
The ethics committee of questionable ethics?
clevercanuck979
Who is the cutest little death machine?
PipeandSlippers
Its like the Toaster from Fallout New Vegas in the Big MT!
wartoaster
Yes hello
ShalomMyFriends
Keter?
andergriff
what?
ShalomMyFriends
Clearly you know nothing about scp
andergriff
Why do you say that? I know what keter is, i just dont understand why you said it.
UngratefulNoob
Welp! To everyone here, I do a series called SCPEveryday on imgur where I post an SCP article or tale everyday. This was my latest one...
UngratefulNoob
... Regardless, if you would like to be added to the taglist for SCPEveryday just let me know. :)
constantlyscreaming
i'd love to be added!
usmikeyl48
I love them!
sdescham19
I would like that, thank you.
[deleted]
[deleted]
UngratefulNoob
@Tagaroo sub repaturs scp s q e
UngratefulNoob
@Tagaroo sub reptaurs SCP s q e
daugbret
Add me, if you would.
CanadianFishNerd
me please
UngratefulNoob
@Tagaroo sub CanadianFishNerd scp s q e
SirReginaldDukeOfChutney
Also people can just follow you.
UngratefulNoob
Following only works if your post makes most viral though. Most of my posts get like 15 or 16 points
SirReginaldDukeOfChutney
I get alerts when someone posts something and then another when someone's post hits most viral.
UngratefulNoob
Really? Because all of the people I follow I only get alerts for most viral. Plus that's how imgur says it works.
SaltismySugar
You dirty thief. You stole from @UngratefulNoob! Lol
sparklepanties
Isn't this from the SCP wiki?
SaltismySugar
Yes, but he's doing a daily SCP thing, this was the last one he posted.
sparklepanties
So?
SaltismySugar
So... OP ripped off his idea and reposted what he's been doing daily for a while now. That's all.
sparklepanties
It's not like UngreatfulNoob has any sort of claim over them. Plus, he's not the first to post them to imgur: imgur.com/user/FoundationLeaks
MRTORGUESRIDICULOUSREVIEWS
What do the object classifications mean? Like keter and safe?
Shumani
Safe - we know how this works, you're good. Euclid - watch your ass. Keter - you're fucked.
Colenelshitpostermcgee
sounds about right
AdamNeverAskedForThisJensen
Safe: put it in a box and forget about it. Euclid: Put it in a box and keep an eye on it. Keter: Very hard to keep in a box.
wlfman
I actually assumed they were just random and meaningless
zoool
Dude, this is a really sweet and short way of explaining them. Can i steal this? Cos im guna steal this.
UngratefulNoob
I mean this is the explanation that's on the SCP website so yeah.
DinosSFM
Thaumiel: is the box
LordofSadFace
Apollion: destroys the box, the table below the box, the building that contains the box...it just destroys everything that exists
freegiant
Schroedinger: is it in the box or not?
freegiant
And if it is in the box: is it turned on or not?
Themurloc
Also safe is usually harmless, Euclid's nature isn't fully understood, but possibly deadly, and keter is undeniably dangerous and deadly
Themurloc
Also being easy to contain could drop something from keter to euclid
SaltismySugar
Euclid and Keter are also usually deadly. Keter often on a large scale.
Imhereforthelurking
Euclid can have strange effects that can be potentially deadly. Keter are extremely dangerous, sometimes on a global scale.
Imhereforthelurking
Safe: the item or being is well researched and considered harmless in its current state. Euclid: the SCP in question is anomalous and not
Imhereforthelurking
Fully understood. Further testing is required, and close observation should be undertaken. Potentially dangerous is care is not taken. 2/3
Imhereforthelurking
Finally Keter: extremely anomalous. Extremely dangerous. Testing is potentially lethal, and difficult to observe safely.