Girls on Tinder

Mar 8, 2018 5:22 AM

capnthunderpants

Views

72513

Likes

2382

Dislikes

86

Girls on Tinder

v

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 1

I usually can’t stand bangs, but I think I can make an exception in this case....

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I wish i was at this party

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Go on...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nice

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I have such a hypersensitive gag reflex that I'd feel nauseous even watching a woman deepthroat me.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Jennifer just eat the fucking banana

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

It's not a fucking banana until it goes lower.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 58 Dislikes 2

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

v

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I swiped right twice. That works, right?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Why not both?

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Girl on the left, all the way

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I can swallow footlong hotdogs whole, then regurgitate them, still whole.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 132 Dislikes 3

What the fuck is thatttttttttttt!!!!!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

"Wanna sniff?"

8 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 0

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH +1

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 23 Dislikes 0

The banana comes out more curved than it started...

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

*bots on tinder

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

If you have these girls in your Tinder list, you either live in a great city or they're bots.

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

man, Lindsay Lohan has really fallen on hard times

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

An ex once said about his penis "It might not be long, but by God it's thin!".

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So the first one is the new girlfriend (Obviously not the wife) and the second one is the ex-wife?

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Now do each other.

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 3

“NOT here for a hookup!!”

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's a very thin banana...

8 years ago | Likes 25 Dislikes 2

Nah, she's just holding her mouth open really wide.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

We need a banana for scale.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It’s a perfectly average banana, and don’t let anyone tell you different.

8 years ago | Likes 35 Dislikes 0

*bot accounts on Tinder

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hey now, some of them are hookers

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Guys who look for these skills usually don't have the length or girth to warrant them.

8 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 3

every guy would enjoy these skills. you might be right about 'look for' though.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Would I even know she had them? I don't need XM if I don't like radio. You pay for these extra features.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

lol. I think it's more like a lucky extra. if you're actively looking for this, and a relationship, you're probably in for a bad time

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Do you?

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 2

Not unless I ram it in sideways

8 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 1

you made me laugh so hard hahah. here have my upvote :D

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Tuna Can Joe

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

*Offers bottle of tequila* m'ladies

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 3

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

*tips penis*

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

HAHAHAHAHA

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You must not go on tinder that often. Girls just looking to get married on there. Ain't no showing off

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 3

Girls on there want to bang hot dudes, not you. You are only worth it if you pay, meaning not hot enough. They bang hotties while you pay.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

Where you from? Girls in LA just wanna fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuk

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 3

Always upvote LA. +1

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I'm always afraid of trying that, because I keep thinking I'll drop my hold on the banana and it'll get stuck in my throat.

8 years ago | Likes 219 Dislikes 5

Prepare your inbox.

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Can’t you just like..swallow it? lol

8 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Seriously, or what if it's too ripe and breaks as you're trying to pull it back out

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

swallow

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Exactly, I don't know how many banana's I've barely touched that have broken off. What would you do? Just try to swallow it or reach in?

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

if it's that soft, I think swallowing would be fine.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I've seen a news story somewhere about people choking precisely because of this. Also of attempting to eat a live goldfish, apparently.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I once put an orange in my mouth and then it got stuck behind my teeth. Very stressful.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Just take a very sharp knife and, while panicking, hack away at the orange! Problem solved, you bleed to death.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's why you always want to have a safety person who knows first aid around when trying it. I'm available on Tuesday! **sunglasses**

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I'm available any time every day of the week.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Was looking for that obligatory "I'll help you train for that banana trick" comment ???? didn't find it, lucky you. RIP your inbox.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

as long as the "banana" is attached to someone, I think you'll be fine v

8 years ago | Likes 222 Dislikes 1

haha

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 0

Same thing could happen with a penis.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 8

v

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Why doesnt this have more upvotes?? I'm laughing so hard right now...

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

8 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

[deleted]

[deleted]

8 years ago (deleted Mar 9, 2018 12:26 AM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

Yeah, but I pretty much don't have one of those, so that's not the problem. More just feel that you can't get a good grip on a banana.

8 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

Just swallow, bananas are very soft so if you pinch a bit off or accidentally swallow it your throat can mush it and then swallow it.

8 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Your poor, poor inbox.

8 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 0

v

8 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 2

.

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

.

8 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

oh boy

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Can a man get some sauce

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

8 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

autodot

8 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1